Morning smiles like the face of a newborn child,
innocent, unknowing...
Winter's end, promises of a long lost friend
speaks to me of comfort.

Lorien is so light that it's hard to tell when the sun begins to rise. I can only tell that day is breaking when he begins to stir in my arms. I know that he told me to rest, but sleep would not come to me no matter how long I waited. I did not lie when I told him that I would find no rest here. Even with his chest pressed against mine, my head tucked under his chin, and his arms wrapped around me my mind is too torn to sleep. I must come to a decision that will affect the remainder of my life, and I must make it very soon.

I cannot deny my desire for the Ring, although my purpose for desiring it has shifted somewhat since this ill-fated quest began. In the beginning, I only wanted to save my beautiful city. I know that Minas Tirith is failing. Gondor will soon fall and I cannot save it alone, no matter how much I would wish to. But I cannot help but feel that the Ring could save my homeland where I alone would fail. However, that is not the only reason that I would desire the Ring.

I would have the Ring in order to keep my king safe. It was only last night that I was able to in some way acknowledge him as such with words, but I have felt it for many days now. A man as noble as Aragorn could be nothing less than a great king of men, and even if he never does claim the throne of Gondor I would follow him wherever he would lead me. I love him, though I fear to tell him that. He has his Elven maid, and after this war is over he will have no need of me in his bed, though I do believe that I would remain in his heart. But I do not know if I could return to being merely his friend when I have already been his lover.

But I fear... I have nothing to lose,
I have so much to lose here in this lonely place
Tangled up in your embrace,
There's nothing I'd like better than to fall.
But I fear I have nothing to give.

I have fought the call of the Ring because I know it is what he would have me do. I have given so much of myself to fighting its song, and the rest of me I have given without reservation to Aragorn. My resolve is weakening, and I fear that I have nothing left to give. Even now I am forced to give less of myself to him in order to continue to fight the Ring. And I do not know how much longer I can continue.

My desires are pulling me apart, and I fear I will soon go mad. Frodo is right to look on me with fear, and Legolas to look on me with distrust. I no longer trust myself, either. My only trust, my only hope is in Aragorn, and I fear that it will not be enough to save me. I must choose either the Ring or my king, and I must choose now.

Wind in time rapes the flower trembling on the vine,
And nothing yields to shelter it from above.
They say temptation will destroy our love,
The never ending hunger.

I glanced up at his face still relaxed in sleep, and my choice was made. It was that simple. Perhaps the Ring could save Gondor, but the price would not only be my soul, it would also be his. While I would gladly offer my soul to save my city, I could not do so with his. And so we will destroy the Ring and save Gondor, together. And when he marries his Elf maid, I will take whatever place is offered to me in his life. As long as he is near me, I can learn to be content.

I closed my eyes, sleep beckoning now that the song of the Ring was fading from my mind. I had feared that my temptation would destroy me, but it did not. My hunger for the Ring did not overpower my love for my king. My choice was right. And I will fear my fate no longer. For my fate is to be by my king's side, for as long as he will have me. And I feel that he will have me for the rest of my life.