You say you can't trust me
Have you tried ?
You say you don't love me
That's a lie
There are so many so many rainbows
That we were to climb
But baby baby why can't we survive ?
We've got to get our heads untangled
And free our state of mind
The difference is why,
the difference is why
Sometimes the scales get unbalanced
Don't you know the reason why ?
The difference is why
Yeah ! , the difference is why
Does this have to mean goodbye ?
-- Lenny Kravitz - the difference is why
Rivendell
Elrond waited until he was sure his trusted advisors was seated before he turned around in a dramatic gesture "my trusted advisors, but most of all my beloved friends" he said and looked at Glorfindel and Erestor "I have come to a decision regarding my eldest son" he said, and both the summoned elfs looked down at their hands.
"I will send him to Aman" Elrond said with a pained voice
Erestor gasped and Glorfindel just stared at his lord "is there really no hope for him to mend?" Erestor said
Elrond shook his head slowly "I do not think there is, but I will do as Elladan asked, I will send for Elrohir"
"What about the mute elf?" Glorfindel said
"This is my 'son'! I right now I am not worried about a stray elf" Elrond said sounding a bit more irritated than intended.
"Forgive me" Glorfindel whispered and looked back down on his hands in his lap, it was not like Elrond to loose his compose this easy, but then again it was not every day he had to send his eldest son from his side.
Elrond sighed and smiled sadly "I understand your worry Glorfindel, but you must understand mine"
"Shall I then make preparations my lord?" Erestor asked timidly
"No, I will make the preparations myself" Elrond said and sat down in his large chair behind his desk "you can send these letters to Arwen and Elrohir" the lord of Rivendell handed Erestor 2 scrolls.
"I will" Erestor mumbled
"That was all my lords" Elrond said "now we just have to pray that sending him to his mother is the right choice"
"Yes" Glorfindel and Erestor said in unison.
Rohan
Elrohir's first thought had been to send a servant, but somehow that would just look like he was backing out, so he had decided to bring Legolas' personal belongings to Dinalu's chambers himself, he put down the box with Legolas drawings and some clothing, before he knocked the door "Dinalu? Are you there?"
The door flung open and Dinalu stood there as had he known it was Elrohir "what do you want?"
"Legolas had some of his belongings in my chambers" Elrohir said and bend down to pick up the box and hand it to Dinalu
"Oh, thank you" Dinalu said softer than before and took the box from Elrohir
Elrohir knew this was his cue to leave, but he still stood in the door "when will you be leaving for Mirkwood?" he said while he kept his gaze fixed on the door knob
"The day after tomorrow" Dinalu said and walked into his chambers to put down the box.
"Oh" Elrohir sighed "I should leave, I need to pack my belongings as well, I should be heading home" he turned reluctantly from Dinalu's door
"Elrohir, we need to talk" Dinalu said to his husbands back
"We do?" Elrohir spat "I was not aware that there was anything left to talk about"
Dinalu just watched Elrohir as he turned to face him again "we should at least find a way to settle this" Elrohir just looked at him with sorrowful eyes, and Dinalu continued, "to annul our vows"
Elrohir bit his lip as he walked past the doorstep and into Dinalu's chamber "if that is what you wish" he said and sat down heavily in a chair, wearing a mask of indifference upon his face
"You started it, now finish it" Dinalu spat
"I started nothing" Elrohir said, still looking away from his spouse "you asked me to choose between you and my twin" he turned to look at the blond elf "and that is the one thing I cannot do"
"Why can't you see he is dangerous?" Dinalu whispered
"Because he is my 'twin' Dina!" Elrohir cried "my mind knows he did something terribly wrong, but my heart wont see it, I love him, I love him more than I love myself"
"And apparently more than you loved me" Dinalu whispered more to himself, than to Elrohir
"That is not true" Elrohir said as he calmed down some "I loved you like nothing else, you were the other half of my soul Dinalu, I left my home to be with you" he shook his head slowly "but you cannot ask me to choose, I simply refuse"
"You wont have that problem anymore" Dinalu said with a fake sternness as he stood up "I had hoped we could somehow reconcile upon my arrival here, but you are lost to me" Elrohir looked up at Dinalu clenching his jaw not to cry "but I had suspected this, so I had my fathers chief advisor draw up a parcel to officially renounce the bond" he blond elf moved to stand next to the small desk in the room "all I need is your signature here" he pointed down on a paper "and you are free to indulge yourself in mortal men, and insane brothers"
"please don't Dinalu" Elrohir whispered
but Dinalu just pointed at the paper once more "do not think me stupid, son of Elrond!" he yelled "I know who you were kissing before I came along, and I know what you did while I was not here"
Elrohir paled, how could he know?! His mouth formed a 'O' but no sound came
Dinalu on the other hand felt his tears begin to run, hot and wet down his cheeks "you bedded him didn't you?" he cried
"No!" Elrohir whispered "I never bedded anyone but you since I met you"
"I meant your brother" Dinalu roared, "You bedded your brother didn't you?"
Elrohir broke into heart wrenching sobs "w-we didn't realize..." he cried, Elrohir looked up at his husband "h-how did you k-know?" he mumbled "we.. We made a pact that day" a new sob surfaced and Elrohir shook his head in denial "he swore.. He swore"
"Your precious Elladan didn't break your pact Elrohir" Dinalu said while he sat down on the bed to look at Elrohir who cried so had he had difficulty breathing "but someone saw you, someone observed you" the Mirkwood prince whispered with a voice full of malice "she saw every single stolen kiss, every hidden touch"
"You lie" Elrohir suddenly yelled
"Do I now?" Dinalu asked somewhat calmly "but I didn't care, I loved you from the second I saw you, even with this knowledge"
Elrohir refused to look up, and whispered, "Why are you doing this?"
Dinalu stood up once more and pulled Elrohir to his feet "see I know this pact you speak of so freely Elrohir, and I know why you wish to have your brother around" he pulled Elrohir towards the table with the scroll "because our love was always a lie" he whispered almost sensually in Elrohir's ear "you would touch my body and think of your brother, wouldn't you?"
"No, I have never..." Elrohir whispered
"If there is any even remote caring left in you, then you will sign here" Dinalu said and planted a quill in Elrohir's trembling hand
Elrohir raised his head and looked at Dinalu, then to the pen, the paper and back to Dinalu. "No" he whispered, "I wont! No matter if you believe it or not, I meant every word of my bonding vow, I will not sign this parcel and make me a liar" he dropped the pen to the floor and raised the hand he had been holding it in to caress Dinalu's cheek, he wiped away his husbands tears and whispered "all this time you were afraid, and I did not see why"
Dinalu closed his eyes crying silently
"You were afraid I would love Elladan more than I love you" Elrohir whispered "this is the reason for your reluctance with the bonding" Elrohir ran his thumb over Dinalu's trembling lips "tell me, husband mine. Why did you? Why did you bond with me if it was all a lie?"
A sigh escaped the blond elfs lips and his eyes fluttered open "because I loved you, and I convinced myself that making you my husband would chase away all the demons"
"And did it?" Elrohir asked
"No" Dinalu sighed "the more I loved you the more the thought of loosing you ate away my heart, until there as nothing left but.. Claim, you were my prize Elrohir, you were my victory"
A hurt expression surfaced on Elrohir "did you share your life and bed with me to get back at Elladan?"
"No" Dinalu said quarried "I did all of that because you were mine, and your love was mine to have, not his"
Elrohir paled and slowly removed his hand from his husband's cheek "I will sign that paper of yours, if it is true that my love did nothing but make you into this hateful being in front of me" Dinalu nodded slowly but as Elrohir bend down to pick up the quill, Dinalu grabbed him and pulled his husband into a kiss, at first Elrohir felt himself melt into the long lost touch of his husband, but then he suddenly struggled to get free "let go of me" he mumbled into their kiss
Dinalu let go but looked utterly confused "why? I thought you wanted... "
"And I do" Elrohir gasped taking a step back from his spouse "but not like this" he took a deep breath "if you really think I have done a crime, and if you really take me for a despicable elf, I cannot argue with you" he hung his head and looked at his boots "but I implore you not to toy with my heart like this, I am not some wanton prize for you to claim"
the blond elf sat down on the spot where he stood, as if a puppeteer cut his strings. "I know" he whispered "and you are right, I lied. I 'did' love you regardless" he looked up at Elrohir who still stood "and I still do"
Elrohir kneeled in front of Dinalu with a sad smile "you had not need to lie for me to let you go, I will set you free if you no longer wish me as your spouse" he said and took Dinalu's hand "I tell you what, I went with you and bound myself to you because I wanted to, because I love you and will do so for the rest of my eternity, but I also love Elladan" Dinalu opened his mouth to object but Elrohir silenced him with a finger to his lips "let me tell you the truth" he whispered "I did bed Elladan, your spy is well informed, and we enjoyed each other more than once" and unreadable expression ghosted across Elrohir's face "but it was all in youthful frolic, we were very, very young Dina, we knew it was wrong, but it was also tempting and wonderfully decadent" Elrohir chuckled hollow to himself "we didn't think at all, and it is a very long time ago my love" the dark-haired elf shook his head "it only ever happened twice, and when I met you, we had not acted anything but brotherly for years before"
"Elrohir.." Dinalu whispered
"No, non of this now" Elrohir said "I don't know how you knew, but I can assure you that you are my husband because I love you with my entire being, but I understand why you would want to disown our vows, and I would forgive you for telling to world why you did so, and this leaves us with the parcel of yours, I will sign it now but know I do this for you, and not for me" with this he stood up and before Dinalu could do anything Elrohir had crossed his signature at the bottom of the page "now you can add liar to your list of my crimes" he whispered as he turned and left the room.
Site Info
We are the home of 1292 authors from among our 2552 members. There have been 2904 reviews written about our 3820 stories consisting of 10734 chapters and 29400445 words. A special welcome to our newest member, Rosamundeb.Categories
Skin Change
Donate
Help us keep one of the oldest running LotR archives available to all. Even the smallest donation helps!
Many thanks to our previous donors!
Many thanks to our previous donors!
