Title: Sauron One, Sam Infinite 
Author: Shoe Sparks (shoesparks@hotmail.com )
Pairing: Frodo/Sam/Sauron
Rating: R
Summary: After the most unlikely person imaginable--with
Frodo!
Disclaimer: I acknowledge that someone other than
myself holds the copyright to these characters. No
profit has been made from this story.

Author’s note: This is my companion piece to "In the Darkness Bind 
Them" by  Nienna Calaquendi.
   I understand it was written as a challenge posted on the Library of 
Moria, and the author feels it is not Rape. According to definitions, 
set by the Library of Moria :
Rape: Consummated sex that is fully against one character's will.
Non-Consensual Sexual Situations: If it's not rape, but it is not clear  
that both characters want it, this is the warning to use. It also  
applies to rape situations where the attack is cut short and not  
completed.
   I feel it was just a glorified version of rape. Which led me and 
inspired me to write this.

                        Sauron one, Sam Infinite

Chapter One:

   The day had lingered on. The land was harsh, barren with sharp 
jagged rocks everywhere. One of those days they speak about like the 
aheader you go the behinder you get. Mostly we just kept climbing, on 
and on. It was dreary and cold and as gray as our moods. So I started 
hummin' a little. Just to try and lighten the mood a bit. You looked at 
me as if I was daft. Then you smiled, just a bit and shook your head. 
But even that little smile told me you were still here.

    Sometimes it's as if we were just takin' a stroll across the shire. 
You laugh and tell one of old Bilbo's stories an all. But it never 
seems to last very long. It's times like these I wish we had more 
company, although it's only been a few days since we split up.

   That evil ring just keeps callin' to you back whisperin' to you. I 
know this.  I here the way you gasp as if you're chokin', grabbin' at 
the place it lays under your shirt. Shaken' with fear. Sometimes so bad 
you loose your footing. Do my best not to get to far from you these 
days. On a count a, you been hurt enough, and if I can save you even a 
little pain, I will! A nasty fall about now wouldn't do you no good. 
You're getting weaker by the day. You don't eat much, and don't sleep 
much either.

   That ring, it's wearing you down to nothin'. I see it you know I do. 
Sometimes you yell at me and say nasty evil things. But that ain't you 
talkin'. I know this. Whatever evil curse is on that thing is what's 
making you do and say those things.  Tryin' to take hold of you. It 
scares me too. The sooner we get rid of that thing the better!

   I awoke suddenly with glimpses of shadows and a feelin' of terror 
surrounded me.  I looked for you. Where you were last when I drifted 
off, but you were gone! Panic, fear and rage overtook me. Where Were 
You! Your pack and all your things were all still there. I listen. I 
listen hard as I can.  Nothin'! Nothin'! Nothin'! Where did you go?

   I grabbed up all our things and started wandering aimlessly through 
the darkness. No footprints in all these rocks.  No sign of you. 
Listening into the night.  Seemed like hours had gone by. I had to go 
slow. Circling the rock we made camp at. Going wider with each pass. 
Couldn't chance missin' you. Somethin' told me you that you were hurt, 
or worse yet, takin' by that evil ring.

   Many thoughts ran through my head. WHERE ARE YOU? I NEED TO FIND 
YOU!  Despair grows fast in me. The path is getting' harder to walk. 
WHERE ARE YOU! Dear Lady, Where is he?  Then as if in answer to my 
desperation, I here a faint sound. It's the sound of pain and terror, a 
choking, gasping whine, and then silence.
   I walk on slowly and here your shallow breathing. Then I saw you, 
shadowed in the night lying on the cold ground. Tears flowed like rain 
on a river. I could not stop.Alive you were, but just barely, I feared 
and Nothin', Nothin' could have prepared me for what I saw nothin'."Oh 
Frodo".

  You were shakin' all over.  Almost like convulsions. You were starin' 
at nothin'. I fell to my knees at your side. Wept with angry tears of 
rage! What had happened to you? How did you get here? Why did you 
leave?
  Marks of scorches grazed across your back and sides. Your clothes 
shredded as if somethin' clawed and ripped them apart. Scratches, deep 
on your arms and legs. Three long thin burns across your mouth, chin 
and across your neck. "Oh Frodo."

   I took my cloak as gently as I could and laid it across your quaking 
body. Your first response was a violent lashing out. Softly I spoke 
your name. Over and over, and you seemed to calm down a bit. I took 
your face in my hands, "Frodo, it's me. It's your Sam."I'm here. I'm 
here."

  I didn't know if I could reach you. So far gone you were, but your 
breathin' slowed. The shakin' seemed to lessen the fight was over, at 
least for now, anyways. You went limp. More tears overtook me. Ever so 
gently I laid you in my arms. I slowly rocked you, like a mother with 
her newborn babe.

    A million questions running through my mind, but I can only hold 
you as close as I can and weep. Dawn was breaking in this bleak and 
dreary place. You haven't moved at all. If it weren't for your 
breathin' I would not think you alive. It's always coldest this time of 
the morning. I have to do something or you will die here and now. I 
wrap you as tight as I can and softly lay you down. I make a fire and 
warm some rocks to put around you, to help keep you warm. It's hard to 
do when I can't seem to stop cryin'.

     That's when I see it, a shinny glimpse of gold, flickering in the 
firelight. Looks like you tried to throw it away. It's coated with 
dirt, like it had gotten wet and rolled in mud. Well, it can stay there 
for all I care. But it makes me wonder a lot. So many questions!

      I open my pack; take out some tea and a pan. We got enough for a 
while. On a day like this, your gonna need it.  I start warming the 
water, then go through your pack. Take out some clothes and a rag, to 
clean you up a bit. Still you don't move. Maybe it's best, at least for 
now anyways. Oh Frodo, what has happened to you?

      I lift you slowly to my lap and remove what's left of your shirt. 
I wash the mud from the side of your face. The burns are swollen and 
raw under the layer of dirt. You stir just a little. I wash the blood 
left behind off your neck and arms. I think my tears are getting you as 
wet as this cloth. You feel like a rag doll in my hands. The scorch 
marks are deep and dark on your pale skin. But what could have done 
this to you? There weren't no fire when I found you. No smoke in the 
air.

   Again the ring glitters in the distance. I think I here it laughin'. 
No, more like snickering at me, but in my mind. NO! No! No! You evil 
thing! I'll not let you, stay out of my head! Is this the answer? Was 
it that evil thing that has hurt you? Did he find you? Did he do this 
horrible thing to you? Does he know who you are? Is he the one? Did he 
take you? No! No! No! I chant on and on No!, and again I weep. I hold 
you tighter and rock your small body to me. I rock us both for I do not 
want to have these thoughts in my head anymore. I cannot fight such an 
evil thing or save you from it. You are left helpless to such torture. 
How can I protect you? What do I do now? What can I possibly do?

   I don't know how long I sat there. Holding you. Rocking you. Rocking 
us both. Weeping. Despair filling my heart and soul. NO! SAM! NO! You 
cannot give up! You cannot give into this evil. Don't you see, if you 
do, he wins! You have to help him. You are all he has. You have to save 
him. There is no one else, just you Sam, just you. I look upon you. I 
have but one choice.

  So I wrap you tightly and set you ever so gently down upon the 
ground.Then, for my own peace of mind, I put a big rock over that nasty 
ring. I don't want to look at it anymore. The water has grown as cold 
as the night. So I rebuild the fire and warm it again with renewed 
determination to finish what I have begun. Chocking back the tears. No 
time for them now.


   You are clean now, dresses and surrounded with warm rocks. Lying on 
the blankets, with both the cloaks wrapped tightly around you. I use my 
extra shirts, for a pillow, for your head.  You stir just a little. You 
pull my shirt to your face, as if to breathe me in. Kinda like you need 
to know I'm there. Hours go by and your sleep deeply, almost a healing 
kind of sleep like when you were back in Rivendell.
    I here you breathe deeply, then gasp with sudden awareness. You 
jump up with a start. Eyes wide, looking around lost and confused. I 
say your name. "Frodo". You see me and wince in pain. I pour us some 
tea and come to your side.

"Hello Frodo, Let me help you". I set the cups down and lift you slowly 
to me. You wince a little as, I set you on my lap so I can hold you up. 
I lift the cup to your sore chard lips. You drink slowly and hold the 
cup tightly. Warming your hands as well. As I look upon you again I 
start to cry. It breaks me seein' and knowin' what he did to you. For 
there is nothing I can do but to be here and see you through this too.
    Softly you speak. "Sam, Oh Sam,"  and I loose it all again. Pull 
you closer to me and rock you again. You let me and you weep as well. 
After a while you put your hand to my cheek, look me in the eyes, and 
softly say, "I'm alright Sam, I am, really".

     But you did not see the burns across your cheek, or the gashes in 
your arms and legs. These are what I have seen. I also know you will 
have to feel the pain of them.

"Sam. Where are we?"
"I'm not really sure, Frodo. I think we're about a half a mile from 
where we made camp last night." " Do you want to talk about it, 
Frodo?""Not that you have to or nothin'."
You look down, take a long sip of tea, and stare off into the distance.
   "I kinda had a lot of time to think on it all. He knows who you are 
and he took you last night, I reckon'."
You spit your tea out at my words.
   "Sorry," I said. "Just thought sayin' it out loud may help you with 
the fear inside, is all."
   You started to tremble as memories flooded over you. At least that's 
what it seemed like. I held you closer, your head in my hand and rocked 
you some more. You closed your eyes to the pain. Nestled your head deep 
into my chest as I rocked you, with a flood of tears from the both of 
us.

   After a time I stopped, lifted your chin gently with my finger. "I'm 
Here Frodo, and I'll never let you go again. I'll not let him hurt you 
ever again. Even if I have to tie you to me!"
You smiled a little, but the pain was still etched upon your face. I 
pulled you in, and kissed your forehead.
     With your head lowered in a small soft voice you said, " Oh Sam, I 
don't remember how I got here. I thought it was you, at first. Your 
warm breath on my neck, your soft kisses on my ear, I'm so sorry Sam."

     I became enraged, took you lightly by the shoulders, "Frodo, Frodo 
NO! NO! You've done nothin' to me sorry for. Nothin'! It weren't you! 
It was pure evil, all wrong it was. I know this! So don't you ever go 
sayin' your sorry to me for it. That nasty evil thing did this to you, 
and I'll not let you be hurt like that ever again! I'll keep him away 
or I'll die tryin'! That's a Promise MR. Frodo, A Promise!"

You look at me, with a kinda lost, unsure look in your eyes.
"I'm scarred, Sam." Your voice was so small.
"I know, Frodo, I know."
"I love you Sam."
"I love you, I have always loved you Frodo. Always."
I leaned back against the rock, wrappin' the cloaks around us tighter, 
and brushed a curl from your eyes.
"Thank You, Sam."
I close my eyes and kiss your forehead, and more tears come.


   I don't know how long we stayed wrapped within the warmth of each 
other. In spite of, or because of all that had happened, I just didn't 
want to let you go. We drifted off together. Breathing each other in.

  Suddenly, You awoke with a start, clutchin at you neck, "Sam, Sam! 
Where is it, Sam?" "Did he get it, Sam?"

"Calm down, Frodo", as you pulled me back to you.
"It's Alright. It's right over there, under that rock, but I don't 
think he could take it even if he wanted to. You see, I thought about 
it as well. I figure unless you give it to him willingly, it could do 
no good to him in the form he was in. Kinda like those wraiths. They 
couldn't take it from you, but they tried to make you give it up 
willingly with them chants and all. If you get my meanin'?"

"Sam."  You looked at me, your eyes much brighter than before.
"I must have been out a very long time. You know your much smarter than 
you let on Sam," and you smiled.
I think that was the first time I smiled since I found you in the 
night. I hugged you and kissed your head.

"So, Why the rock, Sam?"
"It was like, whisperin' to me, laughin' at me.  Trying to get into my 
head. I'll be havin' none of that mind you so I took that big rock and 
put it on top of it. Shut it up quite nicely if you ask me. Haven't 
heard a peep out of it since. Really, felt it was the last thing you 
needed right now as well."
"Oh Sam, My Dear Sam, Thank You."
Your eyes were sparklin' and your smile was a joy to be beholdin'.

"I think I can get up now, At least I should try."
"Hold on to me and don't be getting in no big hurry."
You did stand and I helped you steady yourself. You winced a little, 
but seemed to have a pretty clear head about you.
  "How about some more tea, Frodo, and a bit of food?"
"That would be lovely, Sam." You started walking around a bit, "Don't 
be getting' off to far now!" I can't help but worry.
"I won't Sam." So I got the fire going again and I was putting on more 
water when I heard you yelling. "Sam, Sam!"

  I found you standin' behind the big rock. Your shirt was off on one 
side. A look of terror and fear upon your face as I came to you. You 
were trembling so.

"Now, why did you go and do a thing like that Mr. Frodo?" I said as I 
took you into my arms, pulled your shirt back up and kissed your 
forehead.

"Your supposed to heal a bit before you go lookin' at wounds, you know 
that. If I had had bandages you would not have seen all this."

   I rocked you a bit as the tears fell from your cheeks to my hands. I 
lifted your head to face me, wiping the tears away with my thumbs.

"It's gonna heal, Frodo. I'll make sure of that. It just takes a little 
time. Can't be expecting to heal over night. Can you." I said as I 
looked into your eyes.
"I'm here Frodo. Now you just come on back with me and have some more 
tea."

"I can't Sam."

"And Just Why Not?"

"I have to pee."

" Oh."  I said as I turned beet red, and with that we both broke into 
glorious laughter. So I turned my back and waited. Small gasps of pain, 
but you would be ok. I would see to that. We walked back to the fire. I 
held your hand, and kept you near to me. Swearing to myself this would 
never happen again.

   The rest of the day was spent talking and resting. You needed it 
after all you been through and so did I, I must admit? The journey had 
been longer than either of us expected it would be. It was good to see 
you smile now and then over something small. You weren't movin' to good 
but I figured we'd make better time with you rested than the way you 
were right now. Even if we had to stay a day or two extra wouldn't 
bother me none.

  The evening was gettin' nearer, the sun low in the sky and the colors 
seemed brighter than they had been in forever. We sat by the fire, 
watching the stars come out. We hadn't seen stars in well over a month. 
I had a feelin' it had something to do with that rock, or at least what 
was under it. I wished we could just leave it there but I knew better. 
Frodo was very quiet all of a sudden, much more than before. So I 
poured us some tea and sat down next to him.

"So, what you thinkin' about? Not that it's my business an 'all, just 
wonderin'?"

"Well I suppose mostly of the night. I'm a little afraid to sleep 
that's all Sam."

"There you go again, worryin' about things that you aught not to. I'm 
here and that's my job Frodo. Besides we know now what kinds of low 
down things that Dark Lord can do, and I got it all worked out. He 
ain't gettin' no where near you."

   With that I reached for my pack.
"Look what I got! " I said, as I smiled at him.
He looked up at me as I pulled out the elvish rope, and couldn't help 
but giggle. It was so good to here that from you. It had been so very 
long that we had anything to giggle about at all.

"I think maybe your trying to compromise me, Sam"

"Frodo!"

I know I turned all shades of red. You just laughed so hard you hurt 
yourself.
"Serves you right!" and I took the rope and through it around you, 
pulling you so close, "You will never get away now."

"See I figure I'll make a bed next to those rocks over there. You'll 
sleep next to them. Then I'll tie us together and put the ends under 
me. That way he can't make you untie them. He can't get behind you 
either. I said I would keep you safe, and I'll do whatever it takes!"

"Oh Sam, How did I ever get so lucky as to have you with me?"
"Well, If your truly askin' it's my Old Gaffer that done it."
"What?" asked Frodo with a very quizzical look upon his face?
"It was him who told me ages ago, Go with your heart Sam and you'll 
never go wrong."
"I knew my heart way back then. This is where I'm supposed to be to be, 
Frodo."
With that said I took you to me and kissed your hands. Tears began to 
fall, again.

   You slept like a baby. It only took a little while before you 
drifted off. I worried you may have bad dreams and I was ready for 
that, but we slept better than we had since we left Moria. When I 
awoke, you were just laying there watching me. Your eyes were so much 
brighter than yesterday.
"Good morning, Sam."
"Did you sleep well Frodo?"
"Very well indeed. Sam"
"How about you untie me and I will make the tea?"
"Oh, I can do it Frodo."
"I want to Sam, You've done enough. Let me do this for you. After all 
if it wasn't for you I would never feel this good today. I can't 
remember the last time I slept this well."

So I watch you stir the coals and bring it back to flame. You move 
slowly and I can here little winces of pain now and then. All in all, 
you do seem so much better than you did yesterday.

"Frodo, before we make the tea, I think maybe we should clean those 
wounds up a bit first?"
"Perhaps your right Sam."

You bring some water over and I get out a clean rag and some soap. You 
take off your shirt.
"Here let me get your back."
You turn and I try to be as gentle as I can. I see you tense up.

"I'm sorry, Frodo." You turn and take my hand and look so kindly at me.

"It's alright, Sam. You're doing just fine," and you smile just a bit.

"You know, it was a lot easier when you were out of it. Now that you're 
awake you feel it much more than before." I clean your back and all the 
places it would be hard for you to reach.

"There you go Frodo, Oh one more spot, " as you turn to face me. I took 
the rag and washed the marks on your face and neck. You could see me 
holdin' back the tears wellin' up inside.

"Sam, Why don't you put the tea on and I'll finish up?"
"Alright then, but you holler if you need me."
" You seem to be healin' quite fast", I said as I stirred the coals and 
put the water back on.
"I bet it has somethin' to do with all that elvish bread and teas we 
got."
"That could be, Sam'."

I recon it was as hard for you to see your wounded body as it was for 
me. I here you wince and I want to run to you and take care of you, but 
I work on the tea and breakfast. I pour the tea and dish up some food. 
Sounds like you're about done. I turn and see you trying to put your 
shirt back on.

"Here, let me help you with that, Frodo."

"Thank you, that smells good. I think I'm hungrier than I have been in 
quite some time."

You eat really well. It is so good to see. We pass the day mostly 
restin' and tellin' stories. It's much warmer than it has been lately. 
Can't help but wonder if is has anything to do with that foul thing 
under that rock. We walk together collecting wood for the night. We 
plan to start out again when we wake up. We both dread putting' that 
ring back on you, but we know it must be done. We will face that 
tomorrow. No sense worryin' about it now.

   I was really surprised. You ate four times today. Before it was hard 
to get you to even pretend to eat. It brought joy to my heart to see 
that. Sleep came easily to you. I think I might have tuckered you out 
with all that wood collectin'. You were watchin' me packin' up and the 
next thing I know you were sound asleep.

   Couldn't help but giggle a little. You looked so cute, lyin' on your 
side all curled up, with the ends of the rope stretched out by your 
sides. Your hands were tucked up under your head lookin' like a little 
one back home napping' in the shade of the party tree who's mum was 
busy with elders or somethin'. Those days seem so far away now. Again I 
hope no nightmares come to haunt you, hopin' for just one more night of 
peace. With this I stretch out next to you tie the ends of the rope, 
and hide them under me. You cuddle closer. I kiss your head, and drift 
into the calm night.This night I dream.

Chapter Two:

   Many days have past since that night. You are sleeping. I can here 
you breathing now, Sam, so very deeply. It feels wonderful to be so 
close to you. You were right I do feel much safer. This rope thing 
seems a little much but at least he can't take me away without you 
knowing. We haven't talked about that night much. I wouldn't know how 
to begin such a talk. I wish you had thought of that rock thing sooner. 
We both seem to feel much better after we bury it. It's becoming a 
ritual. It seems to ease our spirits after the long hike. We do seem to 
talk a lot freer than we did before. Hard to put up walls after all you 
been through with me. Though some things are hard to talk about even to 
myself. That night, most of all.

   I read a lot in Rivendell about obsession and possession and the 
powers of good and evil. I wanted to know more about it after our 
experiences with those wraiths, and also about victims of mind charms 
and such. Now that it has happened to me, I'm not sure how to deal, or 
feel about it.

   It doesn't like the rocks you know. It tells me things. Whispersto 
me of things it will give me if only I put it on. It says it can make 
me feel wonderful and sends hot tingles through me at odd times. 
Promising me more. Sometimes they are so strong it stops me dead in my 
tracks. At times like that I grab for you and hold on hoping they will 
pass.Wanting so much more. You never question me, and you never turn me 
away. I don't suppose you ever would.

   I'm frightened by these feelings Sam, and so confused. I never 
expected this kind of torment. Even the pain, he caused me, he made it 
feel exquisite. I lost all control. He had it all. My mind, body, and 
soul! I did not know where I was or who I was then. It didn't matter. I 
just wanted and need it all. He made me want this. He is still making 
me want this.
   So how do I explain this to you Sam? It does not go away either. The 
more I wear the ring, the more I want, need, desire. My insides crave 
more. To feel the touch again. Anger and rage try to overtake me.  It 
is a madness he has thrown upon me. With every step I must fight this. 
I don't know how much longer I can resist.

    You're so close to me. That elvish rope keeps me closer than maybe 
I should be. You move a little, even closer than before. They call this 
spooning. You're trying to keep me safe and warm. I know this, but my 
insides betray the trust you have in me. It seems the closer we get to 
Mordor the more intense and lost I become. I think its part of the 
connection between him and the ring. My head spins between all these 
desires and the Quest. Confusing me even more.

   Oh Sam! You just pulled me even closer to you. If you were awake, 
you would realize just what this is doing to me. My body does not 
listen to my mind. It has a will of its own. Physical desires were 
never that important to me before. That's probably why he came to me 
that way. So he could make me vulnerable to his will. Make me want, and 
need so badly I cannot think. He draws on this knowledge and makes me 
even more exhausted and confused. Knowing this does not make it any 
easier. In fact, it intensifies my need all the more. You just pulled 
me to you. You're holding me ever so tight. I feel your hands so warm 
on my chest and your breath on my neck. Oh Sam!

"Sam!" "Sam, Wake up!"
You jump with a start. I roll to face you.
"What is it Frodo? What's wrong?"
"Untie me Sam, untie me now!' He did and I move away quickly.
"I'm sorry for waking you Sam, but we must talk now! It's important."
You blink and rub your eyes like a small child would.
"I must talk to you now before it overtakes me again."
"Frodo, What is it? Tell me."

I move to stir the fire. In its glow, I see you looking at me with so 
much concern. I tremble at the thoughts spinning in my head.

"Sam, I had to wake you for I was afraid I may hurt you." I say as I 
come back and sit by your side.

"Why would you think that, Frodo? It's alright."

You reach out to me and I pull back. I see the hurt in your eyes, for 
you do not know or understand.

"This is very hard for me to tell you Sam, but it is even harder to 
control these thoughts in my mind. So I want you to listen and don't 
say anything until you here it all. I hope then you will understand and 
maybe you can help me. For you are all I have Sam."

    So I began and told you all I remembered about that night. You 
listened to me as I told it all. How I thought it was you. How I could 
not see or hear anything. How it felt as if I had too much ale and my 
head was swimming. How all I could do was feel, and feel I did.
   Much more than I ever had in my life. How when I realized it could 
not be you, and I wanted it to stop, he took more of me. Probing deeper 
into my mind and soul. Down to the very depths of my being taking all 
of me.
   Each time the pain came I tried to wake but he would make the 
pleasure rise with more desirer than before. He did this until I was no 
longer there, only need, rage, and desire inside me"
     I watched you as I spoke. I saw the anguish grow, along with the 
fear and sorrow in your eyes. You spoke not a word, but listened so 
very intently.
   Then I told you of the ring. Of how he put it in my mouth, and what 
I did in response to it. How he ripped and tore at me. The intense pain 
made me want more because the pleasure he gave next was all the 
greater. The burning heat that raged through my weak and empty body 
overpowered my sense of reality until I was spent and burst back into 
this one.
   Shaking in fear and disbelief I spit the ring from my mouth,staring 
at it, then ripping it off me and threw it as far as I could.
Then I looked around. I did not know where I was, or how I got there. 
Cold wet and scared, I thought it must have been a dream. Then I heard 
him say, "You and I will soon meet face to face, Frodo Baggins, very 
soon. I am waiting."
   I look away from you. This cannot be good for you. It hurts me to 
have to tell you all this but I know I must.
   "Sam, I don't remember much after that, but each time I put the ring 
on it calls to me. I here him whispering in the background, promising 
me more pleasure if only I put it on. It's getting so very hard to 
resist it, and most often I don't want to.  I'm terrified more now than 
I have ever been in my life Sam, and I don't know what to do."

   "As we were lying there tonight, my head was spinning so much. I was 
going deeper down and you pulled me closer to you. Maybe you felt it? I 
don't know? The desire was taking over me I and I started to imagine 
what it would be like to take you by force, like he had done to me. I 
found myself looking at the rock, wanting the ring, I wanted to feel it 
again, like an addiction. That's why I had to wake you. I'm so very 
scared Sam!"

    I was too afraid to look at you, with the fear and horror that must 
be in your eyes. Now knowing what I had meant to do to you. Surely you 
must hate and detest me now. You lifted my head to meet your eyes, and 
pulled me close to you. Together we wept, as we did the day you found 
me there.

   "Oh Frodo, Your not as far gone as you think you are. His control 
over you is waning or from the sound of it, I'd be laid out and stark 
naked right about now! It's just not in you to be hurtin' me. I know 
that. So don't you go a frettin' so."

   I pushed you back from me.
   "Don't You Understand Sam! I really meant to rape you, Sam!

   You pulled me back to you. Your gentle warmth surrounded me and the 
scent of you was so very calming.

  "Aye, I know Frodo, but your lookin' at this all wrong. I understand 
it is the only way you know how to look on it right now. So just relax, 
and let me talk for a time. Not sure it will help, but let me try. OK?"

    The look in your eyes seems so much deeper than I ever remembered 
it before. I nod my head and you begin.

   "You see, the feelings you're havin' right now are only natural."
I move to object but you put a finger to my lips.
   "Yours are just misplaced right now. You've never done or felt 
nothin' like this before. You buried that part of you a long time ago. 
Hid those feelings deep inside you, and now that you know about 'em, 
it's only natural for your body to be wantin' more. Those are some very 
power feelings for anyone's body to have to deal with."
   "It musta been one of the hardest things for you to tell me this. 
You bein' such a gentle hobbit and all. So now I'm gonna tell you 
something just as hard for me."

   "When I found you, my heart was as broken and as torn apart as your 
poor body. I thought I would loose you to this foul place. You were 
shakin' so badly. The blood and the scorch marks all over you, well 
they just overwhelmed me Frodo. I didn't think you would live much 
longer. I wrapped you up and held you, rocked you and cried like a 
baby. It musta been for hours. I don't rightly know for sure."
   "Mostly, I'm ashamed to say, was out of self pity it was. What was I 
to do if you died right here in my arms? It weren't until dawn that I 
even did anythin' to help you at all." When I did and I was cleanin' 
you up is when I figured most of what you just told me out. I just 
didn't know what to say or do about any of it."

  "I was also very jealous and that made me feel awful bad Frodo. You 
lyin' there half dead and me feelin' such things at a time like that. I 
was quite angry with myself for a long time. But I just couldn't help 
it. I was the one who loved you. I should have been the one to have you 
first and teach you about these things. Not some foul creature in the 
dark." I kicked myself a lot thinking those things and the guilt's been 
eatin' me alive."

   "I always thought my feelings must be wrong, I bein' your gardener 
and you bein a gentle hobbit and all. But if all I could ever be was 
your gardened then I was willing to be just that. Least ways I could be 
with you, by your side."
  "Anyway, I must admit it's been awful hard for me to lay next to you, 
so close and not take you as mine. Show you what love is supposed to be 
like. Not the violent evil thing that has taken you."

  "You're all I ever wanted Frodo. I love you, with every once of me. 
Heart mind and soul. I always have for as long as I can remember. I 
want to share everything with you and no one else. Always and forever, 
but after all you been through, I still didn't have the guts to tell 
you."

  "I wish I had told you sooner. Maybe I could have spared you some of 
this pain. I know, if you would let me, I could show you the true 
meanin of your desires, and then you would understand your feelings 
better. Maybe, you would not feel so lost as you do now. I love you 
Frodo Baggins. I always will."

   "So Frodo, now you know my secrets as well. I will do anything to 
help you through this. I'll do anything you need me to do. I'm here for 
you every step of the way. Whether or No."

   We sat in silence for quite so time. Both of us trying to sort out 
all the words of pain, guilt and love we had for one another. But it 
was you who reached out and took me close to you. You held me and 
kissed away my tears. With all the love in the world, you showed me how 
much stronger love is, than evil could ever be. From that moment on I 
knew I could never be without you again.
" I Do Love You Sam, Always."