Title: You Get Us Out
Author: Dinen Glamor
Pairing: Frodo/Merry/Pippin
Rating: NC-17
Summary: In typical hobbit post-party style, the drinks are flowing,
only this time it's a special Elvish liquor...or so Merry and Pippin
believe until Frodo translates the label.
Warning: Threesome. Well, obviously.
Author's Note: This is for the Threesome Challenge of the Library of
Moria Forums.

"Frodo, look what we found!"

Frodo turned to see his friends enter the room. He had been with Merry
and Pippin at a Proudfoot's coming-of-age that evening and, slightly
affected by wine and pipeweed, they had all decided to stay together
in Bag End. Merry and Pippin had wandered off a few minutes
previously, claiming desperate hungers for midnight snacks, never mind
that it was three in the morning and they'd been eating for twelve
hours already.

"What did you find, Pippin?" he smiled.

Pippin triumphantly brandished an emerald glass bottle. Merry eased it
out his hand and took a surreptitious sip.

"More drink!" Pippin cried.

"More?" Frodo said in mock-alarm. "I should have thought you'd have
had quite enough this evening. After all, you aren't used to drinking
like Merry and me."

"I am used to drinking, Frodo Baggins, as you well know!" Pippin
insisted. "You're the one who gave me my first mug of ale."

Frodo shrugged, laughing.

"Here, you have some," Pippin offered. "Merry, for goodness' sake, let GO."

Merry reluctantly released the bottle and Pippin handed it to Frodo.

"You're going to stand here until I drink, aren't you?" Frodo asked in
amusement.

"Like you'd need me to," Pippin laughed. "You may look like the bloody
personification of perfection, but those innocent eyes aren't fooling
anybody here."

"Tsss," Frodo sighed, "I am undone. How has my never-ceasing act
failed to fool you?"

He took a swig all the same and waited for the sharp taste and tingly
feeling. Instead, he felt a rather unexpected warm glow spread right
through him, and tasted fruits and summer.

He handed it back to the eager Merry, frowning.

"That's peculiar; where'd you get it, anyway?" he asked.

"Bilbo's study," Pippin said shortly.

"Well, that explains why it doesn't taste like alcohol – it's almost
certainly something to help him sleep, or just a calming drink. Look,
it's got a label."

"Oh, yes – but it's in strange script, elvish or something," Pippin
frowned as he wrested it from Merry's grasp.

As Pippin touched Merry's hand to take the bottle, something strange
seemed to come over the young Brandybuck. He suddenly stiffened, then
after a few seconds, a moan came from his lips. With no warning, he
leapt onto Pippin and pulled him into a desperate and fierce kiss.

"What...?" Pippin gasped as Merry let him come up for air.

Frodo had picked up the bottle just before Pippin had been seized and
was looking from the label to the couple in disbelief.

"Oh, Pippin," he said in despair, "you've really done it this time."

"What? What? What have I done?"

"Let me translate this for you," Frodo answered. "It says: Draught of
Insatiability – Drink one sip of this aphrodisiac for an overwhelming
lust and spend hours of fun with your loved one or whoever happens to
be around. Made by nude elves in Rivendell. Contains peach
flavouring."

He looked up from his reading.

"I...I don't understand," Pippin said desperately.

"Don't you?" Merry asked, wide-eyed and looking slightly delirious.
"Do let me explain. That bottle you found in the study, that one which
was definitely going to be some really good drinking, actually
contains a potion which is going to make me absolutely gagging for
it!"

"Oooh, Merry," Pippin gasped. "How much did you have?"

Frodo could see that the bottle was half-empty.

"It doesn't matter anyway," he said. "It says that one sip is enough.
We've all had one sip at least."

Pippin bit his lip and blushed.

"We HAVE all had one sip, haven't we, Pippin?"

"Well, now that you come to mention it, I might...not have...," Pippin
whispered.

"What?" Merry exploded. "You convince Frodo and me to have some of
this stuff – which I might like to add, is rather fast-working..." –
Frodo tried to resist letting his eyes flick down to Merry's crotch
but failed and was able to verify the truth of Merry's statement –
"...and you don't even have one sip?"

"Um..."

Pippin was not in a position to argue, his exact position being pinned
beneath Merry.

"Well, that's it. There's only one thing to do: you got us into this
situation, you get us out," Merry proclaimed.

Oh Eru, it really was fast working. Frodo felt the desire wash over
him as he looked at Pippin's startled face and imagined the full
mouth, currently opened slightly in surprise, all over his body.

"What in Middle Earth do you mean?" asked Pippin, sounding slightly scared.

"You're not being very quick this evening, are you Pip?" Merry noted.
"I mean, I want your mouth over my cock and I want it before I just
about explode from wanting it."

"Um..." Pippin started.

Merry didn't let him continue. He trapped him in another ferocious
kiss as he quickly tore Pippin's shirt off.

"Oh, all right then," Pippin said breathlessly as they broke apart.
"If you really want to."

"Wait!"

The two looked up guiltily. They had completely forgotten that Frodo
was in the room.

"Look...I'm not sure if...you can't..."

"Frodo!" Pippin cried, "Now is not the time to revert to respectability!"

"I'm sorry, Frodo," Merry said huskily. "I mean, I understand if you'd
rather we didn't in here. But, as I'm sure you know, that was quite a
powerful drink. If you don't want us here, I'm taking Pippin outside.
Now."

"No! No, I'm not stopping you," Frodo quickly reassured them. "It's
just that I can't...I mean, it's going to be pretty hard to..."

He ran a hand through his hair. "Look, I can't just watch you two. I
had some of that stuff too, and I must say, its effect has been rather
sudden and powerful..."

"Yes, we can see that," Merry interrupted, looking pointedly south.

"Merry!" Pippin reprimanded. Then to Frodo: "You're right. Sorry,
Merry's sudden advances rather wiped the fact that you'd had some from
my mind. Of course, I will take full responsibility for the effects of
that potion and do anything I can to alleviate them."

Merry sighed. "Too much talk."

He leaned over and grabbed Frodo's hand, pulling him closer. Then he
stroked the bulge in Frodo's trousers.

Frodo's reaction to this was cut short by Merry standing and pressing
their mouths together. Then he was pulled away and now it was Pippin
he was kissing, more softly and more intimately, their tongues sliding
together.

He felt Merry taking his shirt off as he kissed Pippin and felt
Pippin's skin against his own. The next few minutes were a flurry of
clothing and soon they were all naked. They collapsed into a pile of
bodies, a tangle of arms and legs and hair and lips and skin. Except
for the agonising sighs, they were silent as they concentrated on each
other, enjoying the revelations of touch.

"Do you have any...?" Merry asked at last.

"Oh, not here; in..." Frodo started.

"...Bilbo's study?" Pippin supplied. He slipped out from under Frodo
and Merry and found his trousers, producing a vial from the pocket.

"What?" he asked defensively as he saw the amused expressions of the
other two. "I thought it might be useful. And I was right."

Merry stopped smirking when Pippin poured some oil onto his hands and
began to run them up and down Merry's length. He closed his eyes and
moaned.

As Pippin finished, he advanced to Frodo and began to gently prepare
him. Frodo gasped as he felt Pippin's fingers inside him, making him
ready.

Merry bit his lip as he watched. "You have no idea how much I want this now."

"I think I might," Frodo sighed.

Merry trailed his hand down Frodo's arm. Pippin moved back and Merry
slid into Frodo and began moving back and forth, gently at first but
getting stronger all the time. He could feel Merry's breathing on his
neck and his fingers dancing over his skin.

Frodo thought that he'd never know such exquisite pleasure as he did
then. He soon discovered he was wrong as Pippin knelt before him and,
after smiling mischievously up at him, took him deep in his mouth.

He couldn't see anything, couldn't hear anything, his whole being
desperately trying to keep up with the double gratification. Again and
again, he felt shudders of almost unbearable ecstasy course through
him as Pippin, teasing, flicked his tongue over his head, and Merry,
lustful as he, pushed ever faster.

"Oh, Merry," Frodo breathed.

Pippin paused.

"Don't!" Frodo begged. "Please, Pip, don't tease me now, I need you."

Pippin smiled. "Good," he said innocently trailing two light fingers
up and down Frodo's cock.

"Aaaah....Pippin...more, please, more..."

Pippin gladly complied.

Then Frodo felt Merry's hands tighten upon him and a second later,
heard the long, raw moan that accompanied Merry's final thrust. It was
enough to send Frodo over the edge, spilling into Pippin's mouth.
Pippin swallowed loudly as Frodo's screams died away, leaving Merry
and Frodo breathing heavily.

"That was...that was..." Frodo attempted.

"Absolutely amazing," Merry sighed.

"Glad I could help," Pippin smiled.

"Wait; poor Pippin! You've been rather neglected here..." Frodo realised.

Pippin shook his head. "No, no, it's my fault you two got horny. Don't
worry about me."

"Your fault?" Merry asked. "We should be bloody grateful. And don't
tell me you don't feel like it after being part of THAT."

"Even if he says he doesn't, we've got evidence to the contrary,"
Frodo pointed out, looking at his erection.

"Give in now, Took!" Merry cried. "You'll come before the night is over."

Frodo and Merry leapt upon the surprised (though not unwilling)
Pippin. As Frodo pinned him down, Merry proceeded to give him a
blowjob. After Pippin succumbed to this treatment, Frodo released him
and joined Merry, both of them pleasuring Pippin. Their tongues slid
against each other as they worked up and down the length of him and it
was not a very long time before Pippin released over the two of them.

After washing, the three of them fell into the largest bed in Bag End,
exhausted.

"We should do this again some time," Merry said dreamily.

"Yes," Frodo agreed. "Anytime you want to slip me some aphrodisiac is
fine with me, Pip."

Merry and Pippin exchanged an amused look.

"Silly Frodo," Pippin said fondly. "That wasn't an aphrodisiac."

Frodo looked at them in surprise.

"What do you mean?"

"It was just a random drink we nicked from Folco. No alcohol content,
definitely no aphrodisiac, just a rather pleasant peach taste," Pippin
explained.

Merry laughed.

"We were rather horny, you know. That much is true. But we did want
you to be involved in the proceedings. Sneaky little fantasy of
Pip's."

Pippin playfully punched Merry's arm.

"Trouble is, we know you. You won't get drunk enough to do something
like this if you can help it, and you'd never respond to any advances
or even outright requests."

"You may not be a perfectly good hobbit, but you're still too damn
good for our liking," Pippin grinned. "So we found an elvish-common
tongue dictionary in Bilbo's study and wrote out a nice little label."

"Mmmm, nude elves..." Merry sighed.

"And that was enough to convince you that you had just had some
aphrodisiac and you therefore had a perfect excuse to be involved in
such goings-on."

"Hey! It was also our...well, mainly my...amazing acting skills, you
know!" Merry retorted.

"Yeah, because it takes a lot of skill for you to act horny, Merry,"
Pippin agreed sarcastically.

"Wait...you two tricked me into sex?" Frodo asked in amazement.

The two nodded sheepishly.

"You're not angry, are you, Frodo?" Pippin asked anxiously.

Frodo shook his head in disbelief. He remembered the delicious madness
of the hour they had just spent together.

"Well," he said finally, "like Merry said, we really must do this
again some time."

*The End*