Title: Heart in Chains. 
Author: Morgana --> morganalebeau@yahoo.com 
Pairing(s): Haldir/Glorfindel, Haldir/Erestor, Erestor/Elrond, 
Orophin/Celeborn. 
Rating: NC-17. 
Summary: Who is Erestor and what happened to him in his long life? 
What caused him to save Elrond's life when the High-King died, 
leaving the Peredhel alone and hurting? 
Disclaimer: These characters are all Tolkien’s. 
Warning: male pregnancy, angst, AU 
Author’s Note : Although there are some references to the Silmarillon, I 
am no expert in these matters and mostly depend on information 
supplied to me by Ilye and my beta Sulien, who I want to thank for 
beta reading this monster. So excuse me if I stay vague at times.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Heart in Chains. 
Part 1 


His life couldn’t be more miserable! Erestor huddled in the corner of 
the room, which he shared with the other servants and wondered what 
he had done to deserve this. 

Nothing. He had done nothing to deserve this, but Feanor hated him 
and the Elf was making his life unbearable. It had all started when 
Feanor’s father, Finwe, had decided to remarry. Feanor never approved 
of Finwe’s second marriage and had done everything he could to break 
up his father and his new wife – Indis. 

Feanor had loathed his new family, especially Erestor, whose mother 
was Indis’ oldest sister. The Elfling had quickly become one of Finwe’s 
favorites, and insanely jealous, Feanor had begun to harass mother and 
son, until in the end, they had been unable to take any more and had 
fled.  

Finwe had ordered Feanor to bring them back and Feanor had been 
forced to carry out his father’s orders. He would have been happy to 
never see Erestor again, but his father had decided differently. When 
he had returned the runaways, he found to his utter delight that they 
had fallen out of grace and that Finwe no longer favored them.  

Erestor had learned the hard way what that meant. His life had 
changed drastically since they had lost Finwe’s favor and he wished he 
could go back to living with his mother, but Feanor had separated them 
and he didn’t even know where she was and if she was still alive. 
Without Finwe’s protection he was at Feanor’s mercy. 

“Erestor?” 

Celegorm, one of Feanor’s sons, stood in the doorway and menacingly 
stared at him. The elder Elf was a vision of ethereal beauty, but 
personal experiences had taught Erestor not to trust him.  

“Why are you still here? My father ordered you to help in the stables.” 

Erestor slowly pushed himself to his feet, staying close to the wall. The 
last thing he wanted was for either Feanor or Celegorm to grow angry 
with him. Father and son had violent tempers and their moods could 
change abruptly. He had often been at the receiving end of their wrath 
and would carry bruises for days. Just when they would start to fade, 
father or son would inflict new injuries. 

“I am already on my way,” said Erestor quickly. As an Elfling, he didn’t 
have the physical strength to defend himself against the much stronger 
Celegorm, who loved to torment him. It was best to sneak away before 
Celegorm’s mood changed.

He had nearly left the room, when Celegorm reached for him, curling 
his fingers cruelly around his left wrist. Erestor managed not to groan, 
knowing Celegorm would enjoy seeing him in pain. “I will be late.” He 
carefully lowered his eyes, trying hard not to agitate Celegorm further. 

“You are already late, child.”

Celegorm’s hold on his wrist was growing painful and he squirmed, 
trying to get away from the other Elf. “Please…” He had learned a long 
time ago that begging didn’t help, but it was his only means of 
placating Celegorm.

“You are just like your mother.” Celegorm’s voice dripped with 
loathing. “I do not understand why Feanor decided to keep you here. 
We should have left you with her. Your presence here is a disgrace. 
You ran away from my grandfather.”

/Nay, we ran away from your *father*. I loved my grandfather./ But 
Erestor knew why Feanor wanted him here. He possessed healing 
powers that were unlike anything Feanor had ever seen and the Elf 
wanted to command them. It was probably the sole reason why he had 
been brought here. “My Lord, I need to—“

“How do you dare oppose me, whelp?” 

Erestor whimpered, as a sickening snap echoed through the room. 
Celegorm had just broken his wrist – again. It wasn’t the first time 
Celegorm or his father had injured him. Celegorm then released his 
wrist, but not before twisting it sadistically. 

“Never forget your place here, child. You are at our mercy. Your 
mother’s actions saw to that.”

Erestor nodded obediently, and was careful not to show the pain he 
was in. His healing powers never worked on himself, and it would take 
weeks for his wrist to completely heal. In the meantime, he would 
receive more punishment because he couldn’t properly carry out his 
appointed tasks with the limited use of only one hand.  “Aye, my Lord.”

“Then go, now!”

Celegorm pushed him hard toward the doorway and Erestor almost 
tripped over his own two feet. He didn’t want to go to the stables 
because the harassment would continue there. The only moment of 
peace he normally knew was when he studied with the elder healers. 

Once outside, he cradled his wrist against his chest and fought back the 
tears that were trying to escape his eyes. He couldn’t show any 
weakness now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor sucked in his breath, realizing he was no longer alone. The 
healers, who he had studied with, had long left. He didn’t need to look 
over his shoulder to know who was watching him. The hair at the back 
of his neck stood rigid in warning and gooseflesh had formed over his 
entire body. At times like these, he wished he was older and stronger. 

“According to your teachers, you are making excellent progress,” 
Feanor said calmly. 

Erestor slowly turned around, knowing from personal experience that 
being disobedient would earn him Feanor’s wrath. He kept his eyes 
trained on the floor, hesitant to look at his nemesis, even when Feanor 
seemed to be in a good mood. He remained motionless when Feanor 
began to circle him, sensing probing gray eyes on him. Showing 
weakness would make this worse and he tried to hold his ground. “I 
like studying with them.”

“They tell me you do well for someone as young as you are, child.” 

Erestor stopped himself from releasing a relieved sigh. It seemed Feanor 
was actually pleased with him! But then disaster struck.

“But you are also clumsy. You did not satisfactory carry out your 
assigned tasks in the stables today.”

Erestor bit his bottom lip in frustration. “That is because Celegorm 
broke my wrist.” A growl escaped Feanor and Erestor’s eyes, still 
trained on the floor, widened with apprehension. 

“A broken arm is no excuse for not carrying out your tasks.”

Feanor’s cold tone made him shiver. His gaze involuntarily darted to 
his nemesis and he gasped softly. Feanor was an Elf of exceptional 
beauty. His long, dark hair reached his buttocks and the gray eyes 
could shine benignly when their owner was in a good mood, but now 
they shot daggers, and they were aimed at him. “I offer you my humble 
apo—“

He never got the chance to finish, as Feanor brutally backhanded him 
across the face. The power of the blow sent him crashing onto the floor 
and his breath hitched due to a blinding pain that sliced through his 
jaw. Acting instinctively, he knelt and lowered his eyes again. “I am 
sorry.” Talking hurt, but he knew Feanor wanted to hear him say the 
words. “I am sorry that I disappointed you.”

“You continue to disappoint me. I should have listened to my sons 
when they advised me not to bother with you. But your healing powers 
can come in handy.”

Erestor swallowed hard. “I will try harder.” 

“Aye, you will, or I will tell the healers to exclude you from their 
lessons.”

Erestor gasped in shock. Studying with the healers was the one thing 
that made his life bearable. But how was he supposed to keep Feanor 
contented when he always carried injuries that kept him from 
successfully carrying out his tasks?

“Do not disappoint me again.”

Erestor whimpered in pain after Feanor had left the room. His fingers 
gently probed his jaw and his eyes filled with tears. Now he could add a 
broken jaw to his broken wrist. This had been an especially bad day 
and he had the feeling it wasn’t over yet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That night, he was ordered to wait on Curufin, another of Feanor’s 
sons. Through the years he had learned to avoid running into Feanor, 
Celegorm, Curufin and Caranthir. The four Elves loathed him and used 
every opportunity to show him. 

At times, he would find comfort in Maglor’s arms and it would make 
him wonder how Feanor’s sons could be that different. Maglor was the 
only one who treated him like an Elfling who still needed protection 
and proper care. But Maglor unfortunately was seldom close enough to 
protect him from the wrath of the others. 

He managed to stand motionless, after putting the bowl of soup in front 
of Curufin. Already sporting injuries, he didn’t want more added to 
them. 

“You little, incompetent…”

Erestor’s eyes nearly glazed over, seeing the angry expression in the 
gray eyes, which were so much like Feanor’s – cruel and unforgiving. 
What had he done wrong this time?

“The soup sloshed over the rim and onto my sleeve when you put down 
the bowl! Can’t you do anything right?” 

Curufin glared at him and Erestor instinctively backed up into a corner. 
“I could not help it!” His broken wrist had made it extremely difficult 
to carry the bowl without spilling any soup. The tears that had swam in 
his eyes most of the day now spilled down his cheeks. He was only a 
child, trying his best to please these grown ups, but his injuries were 
hampering him! Why couldn’t they see that and understand that he 
was doing his best? He wanted Maglor -- wanted to hide behind the 
Elf’s broad back, but Maglor wasn’t close. 

Suddenly, Curufin jumped to his feet, grabbed his injured arm and 
dragged him from the room. Erestor released a pain-filled yelp, wishing 
for the torment to stop, but the Elf continued to drag him through the 
corridors, sending unspeakable pain through his injured limb. “Nay, 
please!” He already knew where they were headed and he didn’t want 
to go there!

Curufin opened a door and then flung him inside. Erestor landed hard 
on the cold stone floor, crushing his injured arm beneath him and he 
screamed in pain. He considered begging for mercy, but then gave up, 
knowing Curufin would never listen. 

The heavy wooden door slammed shut and he pulled his knees up to 
his chest, wrapping his good arm around them. He shivered from fear. 
They always locked him up in this dark room when they were 
displeased with him. There wouldn’t be any food tonight, and they 
wouldn’t let him out until it was morning and time for him to return to 
his daily chores.

Shaking with sobs, he tried to control his fears. Shadows danced 
through the room and ghostly sounds made his skin crawl. “Nana, 
where are you? I do not want to be alone.” 

After long moments, he finally cried himself to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Erestor? Pen-neth?”

The soft and kind voice woke Erestor and his eyes widened, seeing 
Maglor kneeling at his side. “You are back.” Acting on impulse, he 
raised his arms and flung them around the Elf’s neck. It had taken him 
some time to realize that Maglor and Feanor were opposites. Although 
Maglor’s appearance much resembled his father’s, the Elf was nothing 
like Feanor in character. Where Feanor was mean and violent, Maglor 
was kind and understanding. 

Holding on tight to Maglor, Erestor tried to bring his too fast breathing 
back under control. Erestor sobbed softly, enjoying the feel of Maglor 
rubbing his back. “I try so hard to please them, but…”

Maglor soothed him and Erestor was forced to let go when the elder Elf 
reached for the candle which he had brought with him. He lowered his 
gaze in shame, realizing what Maglor would see. 

“Aiya, I am too late – again.” 

Erestor allowed the gentle probing when Maglor examined his broken 
wrist and jaw. 

“That wrist needs binding and you won’t be able to eat properly with 
that broken jaw.” 

Erestor clearly heard the anger in Maglor’s voice, but he also knew that 
it wasn’t aimed at him. The elder Elf had tried to speak up on his behalf 
before, but Feanor had forbidden his son to bring up the Elfling ever 
again. “I am not allowed food at any rate.”

“Who did this to you, pen-neth? Who broke your wrist?”

Erestor trembled, knowing Maglor only wanted to help him, but the 
elder Elf would get himself in to trouble because of this and he didn’t 
want that.

“Tell me, Erestor. This cannot continue. They have been mistreating 
you for many years now.”

“Celegorm broke my wrist,” mumbled Erestor eventually, snuggling 
close to Maglor.

“And your jaw?” 

“Feanor was displeased.” Erestor tried to stop crying, but it was hard 
now that someone supportive was holding him. These moments were 
much too rare. Maglor never stayed long and it wouldn’t be long before 
he would be back at the others’ mercy. 

Maglor’s expression hardened, hearing Erestor’s words. “I will bind 
your wrist and fetch you some soup from the kitchens. I wish I could 
take you to my rooms with me.”

“Do not fetch that soup for me, please. I would pay for that later if 
someone found out and so would you,” whispered Erestor in misery. 
Maglor had taken him to his rooms once before to look after him, and 
when Feanor had found out, the elder Elf had dragged him back to this 
prison. Maglor had also been punished, but his benefactor had refused 
to tell him in what way.

“I have to get you away from here, Erestor. You won’t survive more of 
this abuse.”

“I am strong, Maglor. At least that is what Nana always told me.” 
Erestor wanted this moment  -- this embrace -- to last forever, and 
vehemently clung to Maglor. “I will survive.”

Maglor pulled back and Erestor stared into genuinely warm and caring 
eyes. Maglor was the closest thing he had to a father, and he hoped the 
elder Elf could stay for a few days, making his life a little more 
bearable.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Maglor had left when the morning had dawned, not wanting to create 
more problems for Erestor. The Elfling now found himself being 
pushed down the corridor toward Feanor’s quarters. His heart 
thundered in his chest, scared of what would await him in his 
tormentor’s rooms. He desperately hoped Feanor didn’t know of 
Maglor’s comforting visit that night. The last thing he wanted was for 
Maglor to get in to trouble as well.

After the guard had opened the door, he was pushed inside and he bit 
his tongue in order to keep from screaming out at the pain that swept 
through his broken arm. Sensing Feanor’s presence, he kept his gaze 
trained on the floor, doing his best to avoid the piercing gray eyes. 

“Child, do not stand there! Come over here!”

Hearing the urgent tone to Feanor’s voice, Erestor cautiously looked at 
the elder Elf. Feanor glowered at him and then extended his left hand. 
He could see that one finger was bent in an awkward way; it was 
probably broken. /And he wants me to heal the injury./ This was a test. 
Feanor’s healing ability would easily take care of the broken finger, but 
the elder Elf wanted *him* to do this.

“I will allow you to eat breakfast if you do this now.” 

Erestor -- hungry -- nodded. It had been days since he had eaten last 
and even a glass of milk would fill his empty belly. Gently, he placed 
his good hand on Feanor’s and concentrated. The healing energy 
coursed through his tiny body and disappeared into Feanor’s, healing 
the broken finger. 

Collapsing against the wall, Erestor’s tired eyes cautiously searched 
Feanor’s. The dark-haired Elf seemed pleased, but one could never be 
sure. Maybe Curufin had told him about the accident with the soup and 
Feanor would punish him anyway. 

Feanor flexed the finger and smiled. “Ai, you are truly blessed, pen-
neth.” 

Erestor shivered, wondering what else was going through the elder 
Elf’s mind. Feanor had told him on several occasions that he would 
remain his servant for the rest of his life, as Finwe had lost all interest 
in him. Erestor was deadly afraid he would never get away from Feanor 
and that the abuse would never stop. “I did well?” He quickly covered 
his mouth with his good hand. He hadn’t wanted to say the words 
aloud. Feanor would find them offensive; the elder Elf had told him to 
hold his tongue in his presence.

“Aye, you did well,” said Feanor sweetly.

Erestor’s instincts kicked in. Feanor was never that kind to him! 

“It is a shame that Curufin complained about your clumsiness.” 

Erestor’s mouth went dry. What kind of punishment had Feanor in 
mind for him?

“I am afraid you do not deserve breakfast after all. Return to your 
chores and make sure I receive no more complains.”

Erestor’s stomach chose that moment to growl hungrily. Big-eyed, 
Erestor stared at Feanor in alarm. But Feanor ignored it, and signaled 
for the guard to take him away. 

Once he was in the corridor, he collapsed onto his knees. Using his 
healing powers always drained him and he had already been weak to 
begin with. The guard tried to pull him to his feet, and applied 
unbearable pressure to his broken wrist in order to do so.

Tears sprung from his eyes, as he dragged himself back onto his feet 
again. He had no idea how to survive this day, but he had to. 


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That evening his presence was requested by Celegorm, as the Elf was 
one servant short. Erestor’s heart fluttered with fear at hearing that 
Curufin and Caranthir would also be present. A large amount of wine 
had been delivered to Celegorm’s rooms and Erestor expected the 
worst. The three brothers always turned extremely violent and mean 
when drinking.

He stood rigid, trying hard not to draw their attention, while the three 
brothers were dining. Wine flowed luxuriously and he could that tell 
they were quickly growing intoxicated. He wished he had the courage 
to flee the room, but that would only mean more punishment later. He 
had to endure this here and now.

“Child! More wine!” Caranthir raised his glass and waited for Erestor to 
carry the crystal carafe to their table.

Using his good hand, Erestor cradled the carafe against his chest, 
careful not so spill any of the red liquid. He even managed to 
successfully fill Caranthir’s glass, but when he tried to return to his 
corner, things took a turn for the worst.

Curufin, seemingly stretching his legs, tripped the Elfling and then 
everything happened at the same time. 

The crystal carafe slipped from his tiny fingers and shattered into 
hundreds of pieces. The floor was now covered with tiny shards and 
Erestor, unable to maintain his balance, went down as well, landing in 
the middle of them. The shards cruelly buried themselves in his skin 
and he yelped softly, trying to bite down the pain. 

“Ha, look at the whelp!” Celegorm laughed, amused.

Erestor’s breath caught and he stared at his hands in misery. The glass 
had buried itself in his palms, causing him pain. Pleadingly, he looked 
up at the three Elves, extending his hands in a silent plea for help. It 
only caused them to laugh harder. 

“Take him to his quarters,” said Caranthir, who was still chuckling at 
Erestor’s misfortune. “He is useless!”

One of the guards grabbed Erestor’s collar and pulled him to his feet. 
Erestor had stopped crying, having no more tears left. Feeling numb 
and utterly helpless, he allowed the guard to drag him to the servants’ 
quarters. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Curled up on his blanket, he stared at the wall. The servants he shared 
quarters with knew better than to pay him any attention and 
completely ignored him. He had managed to pry most shards from his 
hands, but some had remained, deeply imbedded in his flesh. Maybe 
Maglor would remove them once the elder Elf had the time to check 
on him. 

Tired of having to live this life, Erestor forced himself to fall asleep, 
dreaming of his mother and her welcoming arms.

TBC 

Beta read by Sulien.
All mistakes are mine. 

Heart in Chains.
Part 2


Erestor had thought this day would never come, but it was finally 
happening. After decades of suffering abuse at the hands of Curufin and 
Celegorm, the two brothers had decided to live with Maedhros, and 
more importantly Maglor. That meant he would finally be reunited 
with his former protector. 

Things had first changed when Feanor had died. In his arrogance, his 
former tormentor had chased after Orcs, never waiting for support. A 
Balrog had attacked and Feanor had eventually succumbed to his 
injuries. Erestor had felt strangely satisfied, hearing about his nemesis’ 
death, but then things had taken a turn for the worse, as he was forced 
to live with Curufin and Celegorm and act as their servant. His freedom 
had never seemed more out of reach. 

Shaking himself from his musings, he concentrated on the present, 
reminding himself that he was going to live with Maedhros and 
Maglor!

Whilst most of the other Elves were on horseback, he had been told to 
walk. It wasn’t that he really minded being one of the few on foot, but 
he was tired and he still hurt from last night’s beating. 

Curufin had grown more violent during the last few decades and took 
great pleasure in showing Erestor his place. Last night had been 
exceptionally bad. Curufin had drunk too much potent wine and had 
beaten him all the way down to the servants’ quarters, leaving him 
bruised and aching. The servants had looked away – as they always did 
– and he had tried to hide under a blanket, licking his wounds. 

The next morning he had been forced to get up early and finish the 
chores he hadn’t gotten to the evening before, leaving him so tired that 
he now almost fell asleep on his feet. He was walking and his eyes were 
open, but part of him had dived into the world of sleep and dreams.

“Stay awake!” Curufin -- seated on his aggressive steed -- kicked Erestor 
in the back.

Erestor nearly stumbled, but managed to catch himself by grabbing 
hold of the tail of the horse in front of him. “I beg your pardon, my 
Lord.” He kept his eyes trained on the ground, not wanting to aggravate 
Curufin further.

Curufin seemed to finally grow tired of harassing him and the elder Elf 
joined his brother, who was riding at the head of the party. 

/Only a few more days,/ thought Erestor, trying to uphold his courage. 
/And then Maglor will be close again. Maybe he will take me on as his 
servant. That way I could get away from Curufin and Celegorm./ But 
he doubted the two brothers would ever let him go. 

Arien stood high in the sky and her rays burned through his clothes, 
searing his flesh. He was thirsty, and watched, miserably, when 
Curufin and Celegorm splashed their faces with water. Several servants 
groaned, as they were thirsty as well, but the water would be rationed 
until they reached Maedhros and Maglor’s keep. 

It would be a long and exhausting walk.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Maglor walked into the courtyard after seeing his brothers’ approach. 
When their request to be allowed to stay with him had reached him, he 
had wanted to decline, but Maedhros had reminded him that they were 
blood and that brothers shouldn’t desert each other. With great 
reluctance he had given in, allowing them to take up residence with 
Maedhros and him. 

Curufin and Celegorm had been forced to leave their realms due to 
their aggressive and dishonorable actions and their need for shelter had 
put Maglor in the position to dictate some conditions. One of them was 
that Erestor would become his personal servant. He wanted the 
younger Elf away from his abusive brothers. 

His two brothers dismounted and Maglor forced himself to calmly 
welcome them. Then he turned to Maedhros, who would show their 
brothers to their assigned quarters. Now that Curufin and Celegorm 
had disappeared inside the keep, his eyes searched for Erestor.

When he finally laid eyes on Erestor, a distressed sigh left his lips. The 
former Elfling hadn’t changed much. Long, raven hair framed a pale, 
bruised face. The long strands were still unbraided and slightly tangled. 
The large, doe-like eyes looked haunted and black circles had formed 
beneath them. Although Erestor had long reached his majority he was 
too small for his age – too frail. Looking closer, he noticed that the 
younger Elf limped. Apparently, his brothers still enjoyed tormenting 
Erestor, but he vowed to put a stop to that. 

“Erestor, join me over here!” As he had been closely watching Erestor, 
he caught the happiness and joy that appeared in the chocolate eyes 
upon hearing his voice. Had his brothers already told Erestor about his 
new task? Knowing his brothers, he reckoned not, as they wanted 
Erestor to feel intimidated as long as possible. 

Erestor smiled for the first time in decades, seeing Maglor signal for 
him to approach. He stopped himself from flinging himself at his 
former protector, knowing such behavior was inappropriate in public. 
“Uncle Maglor…”

Maglor smiled; he still remembered the last time Erestor had called him 
that. Erestor had cried when he had left. “Walk with me, pen-neth.”

Erestor wavered. “But Curufin and—“

Maglor cut him short. “You are no longer their servant. You serve me 
now.”

Erestor’s eyes mirrored his confusion. “I do not understand.” What was 
Maglor talking about?

“One condition for them to be allowed to live with me was that they 
released you in to my care. I am now responsible for you. Curufin and 
Celegorm will never hurt you again.” Maglor wasn’t prepared for the 
impact his words had on Erestor and suddenly found his arms filled 
with a distressed Elf. “Hush now, I mean it. I am not playing games.”

“I never thought… Had stopped to hope… When Feanor died and I 
had to live with them… I…”Unable to finish his sentences, he pressed 
closer to the elder Elf. “I was afraid… to hope… that you had not 
forgotten about me.”

“I understand, pen-neth. Believe me when I say that things will change 
from now on.” He didn’t tell Erestor the rest of his plans yet, seeing 
how overwhelmed the younger Elf was. “Come, let me attend to those 
bruises and other injuries you are hiding, and then I will send you to 
your room with a tray filled with food.”

“My room?” Erestor’s already big eyes widened impossibly. “My own 
room?”

“Aye.” Maglor smiled. /For the time being. I want you as far away from 
Curufin and Celegorm as possible./

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor tried hard to hide his discomfort, now that Maglor was 
examining his injured foot. The elder Elf could do little against the 
bruising, but his injured foot was a different matter. After thoroughly 
examining the poor limb, Maglor was binding it now, finally giving it 
the support it needed. 

“Try not to walk for the next few days, Erestor.” Maglor put away the 
bandages and gave Erestor a stern look. “That foot needs rest.”

“How do I do that? I need to do my chores and—“

“No more chores for you, at least not until your foot has healed.” 
Maglor pushed his arms beneath Erestor’s back and knees and easily 
lifted the underweight Elf. “And you will eat everything I put in front 
of you, is that understood?”

Embarrassed at being the center of attention, Erestor nodded timidly. “I 
will try.” He had no idea what was happening with him. No one had 
ever fussed over him before. Well, his mother might have, but his 
memories of her had faded with the years.

Maglor carried Erestor to the bed and lay him down. “Are you 
comfortable?”

“Is this my room?” He’d had never had his own room before. He had 
always shared quarters with the servants. 

“For now, aye.”

Shivers suddenly traveled down Erestor’s spine. “For now? I won’t be 
allowed to stay here, then?” Of course not! He had been deluding 
himself!  But if that was the case, why was Maglor being this nice to 
him?

“Nay, I did not mean it like that!” Seeing Erestor’s fears return, Maglor 
did his best to soothe the upset Elf. “You will leave shortly, because I 
do not want you anywhere near my abusive brothers. They tormented 
you for too many years. I need to know you safe someplace else.”

“Where am I going, then?” Erestor didn’t like this. He wanted to stay 
here with Maglor; the only one he had ever trusted! His fingers wanted 
to claw at Maglor’s shirt, but he quickly stopped himself, realizing how 
pathetic he would look to the elder Elf.

“I want you to eat this and then you will go to sleep,” said Maglor, 
putting the tray on Erestor’s lap. “Eat everything on that tray! I will be 
back with some hot milk in a few minutes. Hopefully it will help you 
fall asleep.”

Erestor watched Maglor leave his room and then stared at the tray. “He 
cannot mean that! I cannot eat all this!” He wasn’t even sure what kind 
of food this was! He had lived on bread, cheese and water. And this 
food was hot! His food was never hot! 

Awkwardly using the fork -- as he wasn’t accustomed to using one -- 
he managed to place a piece of meat in his mouth. He sighed; the taste 
was fabulous and he dove in, cleaning the plate just as Maglor had told 
him to. On the tray were also several pieces of fruit and he greedily 
buried his teeth in a juice pear. The sweet juice dribbled down his chin 
and he wiped it away with his sleeve. 

He had never before felt this full and he leaned back into the pillows. 
Maglor was spoiling him! Growing tired, his eyes began to darken and 
grow dull. He was quickly falling asleep. 

And that was exactly how Maglor found him. The tray balanced 
precariously on Erestor’s lap, and the fingers were buried in the sheets. 
The empty expression in the unfocused eyes told him that Erestor had 
lost his battle against his sleep. “I do not think you need this hot milk 
after all.” He would drink it himself then. Seating himself on the side of 
the bed, he placed the tray on the floor and studied Erestor. The 
younger Elf looked vulnerable, malnourished and neglected. But that 
would change. 

He had already sent word to Elwing and Eärendil and they had agreed 
to take Erestor under their wing. Now that the twins had been born, 
the parents needed extra help, and hearing that Erestor was a gifted 
healer had worked to his advantage as well. He would tell Erestor the 
good news tomorrow when the younger Elf was rested. 

“Sleep now. You are tired.”

Erestor struggled to wake up again, but failed. “Do not… want to… 
sleep.”

“You are exhausted. Sleep.” Maglor soothingly caressed his charge’s 
hair. “I wish I had gotten you away from them earlier. They already did 
so much damage.” But Erestor no longer heard him. The younger Elf 
was sound asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Where are you sending me?” Erestor still didn’t know what to think of 
this. When he had woken up Maglor had presented him with a set of 
new clothes. He was now wearing a brown shirt, black leggings and 
soft leather boots – though putting them on had been a struggle, as his 
bandaged foot refused to fit in there.

“To the Havens of Sirion, where Elwing and Eärendil live. They have 
just had twins and need someone reliable to look after them. The fact 
that you are also a healer made their decision easier to let you watch 
over them. You will mostly deal with Elwing, as her husband Eärendil 
is often away, sailing. They will shelter you in turn for watching their 
twins. That way, you will be out of my brothers’ reach.” 

Seeing Erestor’s sad expression, Maglor said, “You do understand why I 
am sending you away, don’t you, pen-neth? If it were up to me, I would 
keep you here, treat you like a son, but my brothers’ presence makes 
that impossible.” Maglor pleaded with Erestor to understand. “If I kept 
you here they would find other ways to harass you.”

In his heart, Erestor knew Maglor’s words to be true. “I appreciate what 
you are doing for me, but… I had hoped I could stay here – with you. 
You are the only friend I ever had.”

“You will make new friends, Erestor,” said Maglor warmly. “Elwing’s 
twins are still mere babies, but one day they will grow up into fine 
young warriors. The fact that you took care of them will create a strong 
bond. You will have friends. Trust me on this.”

“I will go to the Havens of Sirion, then.” Erestor’s heart felt heavy now 
that he had to leave Maglor again. “I wish I could stay though.”

“I know you do. And you won’t travel alone. One of my men will take 
you there.” Maglor rested a hand on Erestor’s shoulder. The younger 
Elf looked better after a good night’s sleep and he hoped Erestor would 
continue to grow stronger once he was away from Celegorm and 
Curufin.

“When do you want me to leave?” Erestor plucked at his sleeve, feeling 
nervous and insecure. He knew no one at the Havens of Sirion. 

“Tomorrow morning. My brothers will celebrate tonight and much 
wine will flow. I want you to stay here in your room and lock the door. 
Make sure no one enters. I do not know how quickly they will learn 
about my plans for you, and as they are unpredictable, I do not want to 
find out their reactions to this news whilst you are still here.”

“I will keep my door locked,” promised Erestor softly. “Will I see you 
again before I have to leave?”

“Maybe.” Maglor gently squeezed the younger Elf’s shoulder. “Make me 
proud of you, like a father would be of his son. Be kind to Elwing and 
obey her. Although she is still very young, she is also very wise, as well 
as protective, now that she is a mother. I would not be surprised to 
learn she would mother you as well.”

That last sentence actually made Erestor smile. “Thank you for 
everything. You saved my life.”

“I am glad I could be of service. Though it is much too late. You never 
deserved such cruel treatment, pen-neth.” He rose from his chair, 
briefly hugged Erestor and then marched out of the room. “Lock the 
door behind me!” he said on his way out.

Erestor obeyed, quickly locking the door. His life was about to change 
again and this time hopefully for the better.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rhoss, one of the few guards Maglor trusted unconditionally, would 
escort Erestor on his journey. The warrior would also remain at the 
Havens, to become Elwing’s personal guard. That way, Maglor 
reckoned that Rhoss could keep an eye on Erestor as well. 

Maglor had found a moment to say his final goodbyes and joined them. 
Erestor and Rhoss had already mounted and Maglor could tell that the 
youngest Elf was nervous. Erestor had probably never before been on 
horseback. “Travel slowly,” he said, addressing Rhoss. “There is no need 
to rush.” 

The warrior nodded in understanding. “And maybe you would like me 
to teach him some basic survival skills?”

“Teach him after you arrived in the Havens. This is a very confusing 
time for him.”

Rhoss nodded again. “I will make sure he gets there in one piece and 
introduce him to Elwing and Eärendil.”

“They are expecting you.” Maglor now turned to Erestor. The Elf still 
looked like a child to him. “Elwing is a very kind woman. She will treat 
you well. Your life will change for the better once you live with her.”

“I hope so,” whispered Erestor softly. “Wish I did not have to leave you 
to get a better life.” Although several Elves, including Rhoss, were 
looking at him, Erestor leaned in closer, giving Maglor one last hug. 

Feeling Erestor’s arms around his neck, Maglor smiled and patted the 
back, making sure Erestor didn’t accidentally fall from the back of the 
horse. “May Elbereth bless you and keep you safe on this journey.”

Erestor controlled the tears that swam in his eyes, maintaining a calm 
front, but inwardly, he was screaming. He didn’t want to leave the one 
Elf who cared for him. 

But then Maglor gave the sign and Rhoss steered his horse toward the 
road. Erestor’s horse followed instinctively. Looking over his shoulder, 
Erestor waved at Maglor in goodbye. His gaze briefly shifted to 
Maglor’s right, catching sight of Celegorm, who was glaring at him in 
loathing.

/Maglor was right. My life would have been hellish if I had stayed here. 
I have to leave./ Maglor’s form grew smaller and eventually faded from 
his view. Patting the horse’s neck, he hoped he would find some 
measure of peace serving Elwing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Rhoss? What is that?” During their journey Erestor had come to 
somewhat trust the warrior, as Rhoss was always kind and patient with 
him. That beginning trust was also why he now dared to ask this 
question.

“That is lots of water!” said Rhoss teasingly, having long ago decided 
that this young Elf was much too serious and shy. When he had begun 
to make some teasing remarks Erestor had withdrawn into himself, but 
now the younger Elf was growing more confident and actually smiled 
at his teasing. 

“I know,” said Erestor, grinning. 

“That is the river Sirion,” explained Rhoss patiently, “And that is the 
bay of Balar. This will be our home for quite some time.”

Erestor loved the way Arien’s golden rays were reflected by the water 
and his eyes widened, seeing the ships that traveled down the river. 
The Havens were a marvelous sight and he nearly lost himself in his 
admiration for the beautifully crafted ships. The houses, build from 
wood and stone, housed busy Elves. He instantly liked this place. The 
soft breeze, coming from the water, played with his hair and he quickly 
covered his mouth after releasing a pleased giggle. He just didn’t giggle, 
never!

Rhoss laughed warmly and then urged his horse to continue. 

Erestor found they were heading for one of the larger houses, which 
was completely made from stone, except for the roof, which carried 
straw. The closer they got, the more scents he was able to identify. 
Someone was cooking a delicious meal. And then there was joyful 
laughter, coming from inside the house. It was a women’s voice. 

“Nay, Elrond, do not do that! Elros, stay here!”

“That must be Elwing,” whispered Erestor in surprise. For the very first 
time it registered with him that this *was* his new home. He hoped he 
would be happy here.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“My Lady? This is Erestor. Lord Maglor already told you about him.” 
Rhoss had taken it upon himself to introduce them.

Elwing nodded, shifting one impatient twin from one arm to the other. 
“Aye, he sent me a letter.”

Erestor had first stared at the floor, uncertain how to act around her, 
but her sweet and kind voice made him look at her. She was beautiful. 
Long, raven- haired with big gray eyes, she didn’t radiate the authority 
Erestor had expected to find in her. Instead, she appeared caring and 
loving to him, judging by the way she was holding her sons. One of the 
boys was tugging at her braids and the other was trying to crawl off of 
her lap. They were obviously a handful, but Elwing just smiled at them. 
Erestor instantly liked her.

“I would love to help,” said Erestor, priding himself with the fact that 
he sounded calm.

“Maglor also told me you have some healing skills,” said Elwing. 
“Elbereth knows we need them. These two always get themselves into 
trouble. Yesterday, Elros crawled out of the room and Elrond followed 
– of course. I reached them just in time, as they were about to pull at 
our goat’s tail. The poor animal would not have liked that and might 
have retaliated. I need an extra watchful eye directed on them.”

“I will do my best,” said Erestor, smiling at the babies. 

Seeing Erestor’s expression, Elwing asked, “You have never seen babies 
before?”

Erestor blushed slightly. Celegorm and Curufin only allowed females 
close who were without child. But of course they got pregnant after a 
while and then they were sent back to their elders. “I have never seen 
babies before.” 

“As you can see, these two are twins.” Elwing signaled for Erestor to 
come closer. “This is Elrond, the younger of the two, but also the most 
curious one. Open your arms and hold him.”

Erestor wanted to protest, afraid he would drop the baby, but Elwing 
persisted. She showed him how to support the baby’s head and he felt a 
bit more secure holding Elrond. “He is cute.” Elrond was staring at him 
with big grayish-blue eyes and then opened his tiny hand to grab his 
finger. 

“He likes you,” said Elwing pleased. She rose from the chair and walked 
over to a door in the back. “This is your room, next to the babys’ and 
mine.” 

Erestor followed suit and swallowed hard, finding the room pleasantly 
decorated with paintings of the sea. “Thank you, my Lady. You are very 
kind.”

“Remember that when the twins cry their lungs out,” said Elwing 
goodheartedly. “Will you help me bathe them?” She hoped Erestor 
would take over certain tasks as she felt exhausted. The twins were four 
years old now and constantly kept her busy.

“Please show me what to do.” Erestor followed Elwing to the 
bathroom, all the time staring at the tiny Elfling in his arms. Was it just 
his imagination or were Elrond’s eyes twinkling at him? /You really are 
cute. And aye, I think I am going to be happy here, looking after you 
and your brother./

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine. 

Heart in Chains.
Part 3.


“Elros, do not do that. That is mud! Dirt! Do not throw it at… Elrond.” 
Erestor sighed, finally understanding why Elwing had been so 
exhausted when Rhoss and he had arrived. The twins seldom slept, 
were always moving about and Elros especially had a wicked streak. 
Elrond was the calmer, more serious one. That was probably the very 
reason why Elros had decided to throw several handfuls of mud at his 
twin, who until now had put up little to no resistance. 

After watching Elwing take care of the twins for some weeks, she 
judged he was ready to handle them for one hour. She had told him to 
take them outside and play with them in the gardens, but then Elros 
had crawled away and found the pool of mud. 

“Now I have to clean up your brother.” But he couldn’t let Elros out of 
sight either. That meant picking up them both and taking them to the 
bathroom. “Elrond, please behave, whilst I stop your naughty twin.” 

Erestor saw the handful of mud that was aimed at his face too late and 
the cold substance hit him on his right eye. “Elros!” Removing some of 
the wet earth from his face, his gaze traveled to Elrond, hoping the 
younger twin didn’t plan on imitating his brother. “You are a good 
boy,” said Erestor soothingly, seeing Elrond look at Elros in irritation. 
“At least you are not throwing mud at me.” 

“Are they giving you trouble?” 

Hearing a strange, male voice, Erestor reacted at once. Determined to 
protect the twins, he pulled Elrond behind him and picked Elros up 
from the muddy ground. “Who are you? What are you doing here? 
What do you want?” He took in the stranger’s appearance, wondering 
why he hadn’t heard the Elf approach. Maybe it was because he was no 
longer as tense as he used to be when living with Celegorm and 
Curufin. 

The dark-haired Elf’s probing gaze worried Erestor and he tried to 
shield the twins from the stranger’s looks. “What do you want?” 

“Ada!” Elrond, who had felt scared because Erestor had reacted that 
oddly, had finally looked up, uttering one of the few words he had 
already learned. “Ada!” Enthusiastically, he began to half walk, half 
crawl toward Eärendil.

“You are their father?” Erestor still felt reluctant to trust the stranger, 
but seeing Elrond’s warm smile and the eagerness with which the 
Elfling grabbed hold of his father’s leg, he gave in, putting Elros back 
onto the ground. 

“Aye, I am Eärendil,” said the dark-haired Elf. His blue eyes sparkled 
like clear water and he quickly lifted his sons in his arms. “Ah, I missed 
the two of you!”

Elros was cooing happily and Elrond tried to get his arms around his 
father’s neck, failing of course, as his arms were much too short. Erestor 
found himself smiling, sensing the twins’ pleasure at being reunited 
with their father. 

Elwing, who had seen her husband walk into the gardens, joined them 
and giggled, seeing the state Erestor and Elrond were in. Smiling at 
Eärendil, she intertwined their fingers and smoothed back Elros’ 
tangled hair. “Erestor, why don’t you clean yourself and Elrond up, and 
then join us for dinner in half an hour?”

Erestor blushed weakly. From the first day on, Elwing had treated him 
like a friend, maybe even as a younger brother, but never as a servant. 
He still remembered the first time she had invited him to have dinner 
with her. He had been rendered speechless and had later apologized for 
not saying a single word all evening long. The truth was that he had 
been overwhelmed by her friendliness. 

Nodding, he accepted Elrond into his arms when Eärendil handed him 
the youngest twin. “This won’t take long.” As he turned around to head 
for the house, he heard Eärendil laughing and Elwing lecturing Elros. 
/This is a happy family./ And he began to feel part of it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After sitting Elrond down on the cupboard Erestor took hold of a 
washing cloth and a bar of soap. After soaking the cloth in tepid water 
and creating lather, he moved the fabric over Elrond’s face, removing 
the mud. “Your brother is a lively one.” Elrond looked at him 
pensively, which made Erestor smile. “I have been called too serious by 
Rhoss many times, but you are even worse than me. Why are you 
looking at me like that?”

Elrond cocked his head and looked at him with large, gray eyes. Erestor 
smiled at the Elfling and continued to clean him up. “There. 
Fortunately Elros missed your clothes.” 

Unexpectedly Elrond raised his right hand and pressed its palm in the 
mud that still clung to Erestor’s face. “Aiya.” Now he could start over 
again. “Give me your hand before you spread it all over yourself.”

Catching the Elfling’s gaze, he wondered about the mischief he read in 
the large gray orbs. “So you did that on purpose! You are a naughty 
little Elfling and you deserve to be punished!” Punishment always 
consisted of tickling, raspberries delivered to Elrond’s naked skin and 
more tickling. One minute later, Elrond was squirming happily, 
giggling and trying to avoid those tickling hands. 

“Elrond likes you,” said Eärendil, who had decided to check on his 
youngest son. He liked what he was seeing. Elwing had chosen well 
when she had agreed to taking Erestor in. His wife had just told him 
how fond she had grown of Erestor and he wanted to thank the 
younger Elf for looking after the twins. But he wasn’t prepared to see 
the frightening panic in the younger Elf’s eyes upon addressing him. 
Apparently Erestor hadn’t heard him enter and felt intimidated. 

Erestor reacted instinctively, finding himself in a small room with a 
much older Elf, and backed away from Eärendil. He had learned the 
hard way to be cautious around other Elves. 

When Eärendil didn’t try to approach, Erestor gathered his courage. “I 
hope I cleaned him up satisfactorily.” Carefully, he picked up Elrond 
and then placed the Elfling in Eärendil’s arms.

“You still need to clean up yourself,” said Eärendil, careful to keep his 
tone warm and gentle. When he had read Maglor’s letter, he had read 
between the lines, realizing the real reason why Maglor was sending 
Erestor to live with them. He had met Maglor’s brothers once and had 
taken an instant dislike to them. “You might want to hurry as Elwing is 
already setting the table.”

Erestor nodded, feeling shy and hesitant. He hoped Eärendil 
understood that this wasn’t something personal. He just wasn’t 
comfortable around male Elves. “I will join you in a moment.”

Eärendil cradled Elrond, who was yawning tiredly, against his chest 
and left the bathroom, hoping Erestor would quickly join them. Elwing 
had grown very fond of the younger Elf in a very short time and now 
Eärendil was curious to find out for himself why Erestor made such 
excellent company.

In the bathroom, Erestor stared at his reflection in the mirror. “Calm 
down. Calm down. Eärendil is not like Curufin or Celegorm. He does 
not mean me any harm… I hope.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eärendil sat down at the table, watching Elwing place the twins in 
their crib. Elrond and Elros weren’t thrilled about that and their tiny 
fingers clung to her dress, trying to stop her from leaving. 

“You need to sleep.” Elwing sat down and resorted to the one thing that 
could get them to sleep. She sang them a lullaby. 

Eärendil got up from the table and went into the kitchen to check on 
their food. Elwing had never wanted many servants around, preferring 
to do things herself. But Erestor seemed to have changed her mind and 
he thanked the younger Elf for that. At times he felt like she was doing 
too much, and now with the twins around Elwing would exhaust 
herself. 

“What is your impression of Erestor? He has been taking care of the 
little ones for some weeks now and it looks like they are smitten with 
him.” Eärendil had waited for Elwing to stop singing and now slung an 
arm around her waist. Looking into the crib, he found that Elros was 
asleep, but Elrond wasn’t. But at least the youngest twin was quiet and 
giving them a moment of peace and quiet. 

Elwing, seeing that her husband had already carried the food to the 
table, seated herself opposite him. After making sure that Erestor was 
still in the bathroom, she said, “I like him. He has a good heart, is kind 
and very protective of the twins.” She paused momentarily, giving her 
husband a thoughtful look. “But I also worry for him. He is easily 
startled and intimidated, barely shows any initiative and…” She was 
forced to stop talking when Erestor shyly shuffled over to the table. “Sit 
down, mellon, and eat with us.”

Eärendil caught the confusion in the younger Elf’s eyes at being called 
a friend. /I will write Maglor tonight. I have many questions 
concerning this one./

Erestor gingerly seated himself, occasionally glancing nervously at 
Eärendil, which the elder Elf found disconcerting. Erestor obviously 
didn’t feel safe with him close. /Caranthir, Curufin and Celegorm have 
a reputation for being cruel, rash and aggressive. If he lived with them I 
understand why he is acting this way and why Maglor asked us to take 
Erestor in. But I want to know for sure./

“Would you keep an eye on the twins tonight?” It took Eärendil several 
moments before he finally managed to make eye contact with Erestor. 
The misery, pain and fear in the large eyes tore at his soul.

“Of course, that is why I am here; to take care of them,” Erestor almost 
tripped over his own words, rambling in an effort to hide his 
nervousness. 

“Good, for I want to spend the evening with my beautiful wife,” said 
Eärendil, pleased that Erestor would look after their children. “I am 
surprised however, that you find the company of two babies 
satisfactory. Isn’t it about time you took a mate?”

Erestor nearly choked on his vegetables. “Mate?” Open-mouthed, he 
stared at Eärendil in shock. He had never before thought of finding 
himself a mate. For too many decades his life had been ruled by Feanor 
and his menacing sons. What was he supposed to say to that? “I am still 
too young to bind myself to someone,” Erestor said eventually, hoping 
Eärendil wouldn’t push the matter. 

Eärendil reckoned Erestor was already several hundred years old, and 
that wasn’t too young to be bonded. But, it was Erestor’s decision 
eventually. He could merely try to give the younger a nudge in what he 
considered the right direction. 

“We should eat now.” Elwing smiled, a bit embarrassed when her 
stomach growled. The twins kept her busy, and she had used up her 
energy reserves. 

Erestor looked at the food on his plate. Living near the water meant 
they ate sea food most of the time, and although he had found it funny 
tasting in the beginning, he was now getting used to it. He was 
wondering what they would be eating this time. 

Seeing his questioningly expression, Elwing gladly explained. “’Tis 
trout, Erestor, griddled trout with fresh herbs. Try it, I am sure you will 
like it.” 

Erestor broke off a piece of freshly baked bread, instantly smelling the 
rosemary she had added to the dough before baking it. Taking his first 
bite of the trout, his eyes widened when his taste buds tingled and then 
exploded. 

Eärendil couldn’t help finding Erestor’s expression amusing and 
laughed warmly. Erestor looked like he had never eaten something like 
this before. He and his wife watched in amusement as Erestor cleaned 
his plate in minutes. It looked like he was about to *lick* it clean and 
Eärendil quickly exchanged a look with Elwing. “It seems Erestor is 
still hungry.”

Elwing smiled, pleased that Erestor was beginning to put some meat on 
his bones. When the younger Elf had arrived, he had been much too 
thin for her taste. When she had finished as well, she got up from the 
table and carried another, slightly larger plate to the table.

Erestor’s toes curled, inhaling the sweet scent. What was it this time?

“Round pastries basted in honey,” said Eärendil, licking his lips. This 
was one of his favorites. 

Elwing placed a pastry on each plate and watched them devour them. 
She nipped from her glass of wine, once more noticing that Erestor 
didn’t touch his and preferred water instead. Whenever he looked at 
the carafe filled with red wine, a frown formed on his brow. /I wonder 
who drank so much wine that he is wary of it./

“’Tis… delicious,” moaned Erestor in divine pleasure, regretting the fact 
that delicious was such an inapt way of describing this delight. 

“Here, have another one.” Elwing placed a second pasty on his plate, 
enjoying watching him eat. When Eärendil reached for her hand, she 
intertwined their fingers again, lovingly rubbing the skin. As Eärendil 
was away often, she cherished the moments that he was at home. She 
was already looking forward to walking the gardens with him tonight 
and maybe he would take her down to the Havens to watch the sunset. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Aiya, Elros, behave.” Erestor had uncovered their favorite toys once 
the twins’ minds were set on creating havoc, but Elros’ idea of fun was 
stealing away his brother’s little boat. 

“Mine!” Elrond suddenly lunged for his boat and pulled it out of his 
twin’s hands. 

“Elrond, that is not a nice thing to do.” Erestor sighed, wondering if 
these two would ever give him a moment’s rest. The twins were never 
apart, and when they found it necessary they teamed up against him. 
Erestor had found that Elros was usually the one to instigate some 
mischief and then Elrond would follow his twin’s lead. “Look, it is an 
octopus!” The ‘octopus’ was made of soft brown fabric, with eight long 
legs and a big, bobbing head. It was Elros’ favorite toy. 

Elros reached for it, buried his tiny fingers around two legs and then 
pretended to attack Elrond with it. Elrond shrieked and Erestor quickly 
provided the youngest twin with his defense. The youngest twin closed 
his fingers around the blue dolphin, which was slightly larger than his 
brother’s octopus and a fierce battle between the two toys -- and boys -
- erupted. 

Erestor leaned back and watched them. They were occupied with their 
play and he could  ‘rest’ for one moment. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Elwing pressed a finger across her lips, signaling for her husband to 
stop talking. 

Eärendil smiled, seeing the twins had fallen asleep in Erestor’s arms. 
Well, they had obviously exhausted Erestor, and all three of them had 
fallen asleep on the floor amidst an arena of toys. “I will put them in 
their crib.”

“Should I wake Erestor?”

“He will wake up when I remove our handfuls from his arms,” said 
Eärendil knowingly. He could sense the tight bond that was developing 
between Erestor and his children. It was good to know they were well-
cared for during his absence and that Elwing had help raising them. 

The moment he removed Elrond from Erestor’s arms, the sleeping Elf 
stirred, Erestor instinctively tightening his hold on Elros, who was still 
cradled against his chest. 

Eärendil placed Elrond in the crib and then returned to get Elros as 
well. Erestor’s eyes filled with alertness, and Eärendil could tell the 
younger Elf was ready to defend the child if necessary. “Peace, ‘tis only 
I.” 

Erestor nodded tiredly. The twins had worn him down. “They are so 
energetic.” 

Elwing giggled, agreeing full-heartedly. “And they will get worse.”

“Aiya, no,” Erestor whispered in mock shock. “They are little 
monsters.”

“Elros is,” said Eärendil teasingly, “Especially when he is close to any 
mud!”

Laughing warmly, Erestor felt honored to be part of their little family. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Elrond? What are you doing here?” Erestor stared at the Elfling in 
surprise. How had the four year old managed to get out of his crib?

Elrond cocked his head, opened his arms, reached for the side of 
Erestor’s bed and climbed onto it. 

Erestor, afraid that Elrond might fall, quickly gathered the Elfling in his 
arms. “Pen-neth, you cannot come into my room like that. When your 
parents notice you are missing, they will panic, and we do not want 
that.” He planned on taking Elrond back and tucking him in again.

But the youngest twin had different ideas. “Naya,” Elrond mumbled, 
still struggling to learn to pronounce words. “Staya”

“You cannot stay here, Elrond.” Erestor searched the child’s face, 
wishing Elrond was old enough to tell him why he had sought him out. 
“Is it something Elros did?”

Elrond slowly shook his head and then proceeded to snuggle up to 
Erestor. “Staya.” He hoped he had finally made his point and that the 
elder Elf understood that he wanted to stay. 

But Erestor wasn’t going to give in. “Your Nana and Ada will be upset 
when they cannot find you. I have to take you back.”

“Naya!” With one hand Elrond clawed at the material of Erestor’s night 
shirt and fiercely shook his head. Making it even harder for Erestor to 
lift him, he tightly snatched the sheet in his other hand. “Staya!”

Erestor realized that arguing with a four year old wouldn’t get him 
anywhere, so he carefully tried to pry Elrond’s fingers loose from the 
sheet and his night shirt. “You need to sleep in the crib, pen-neth, and 
not with me.” The piercing look Elrond gave him told him the Elfling 
didn’t agree. 

“Let him stay for the night if his presence does not bother you,” said 
Eärendil, who was standing in the doorway. 

Erestor gasped in surprise and his eyes frantically studied the elder Elf’s 
face for signs that Eärendil was angry with him, but the twins’ father 
was smiling instead. “He does not bother me.”

“Elros managed to climb into our bed, snuggling up to his mother. I do 
not know why they left their crib, or why Elrond sought you out 
instead, but I am inclined to let him sleep here. I do not want to upset 
him further by returning him to an empty crib. Elros has a similar hold 
on my wife and I could not pry him loose either.”

Erestor found he had involuntarily kept his breath during Eärendil’s 
speech, and now sighed, relieved. Apparently Eärendil approved of 
Elrond sleeping in his bed tonight and he wasn’t sure how to react to 
that. He had to admit that he enjoyed cradling Elrond in his arms, but 
he was just the minder, and not one of the Elfling’s parents. Elrond 
should have gone to Elwing as well. 

“I brought his blanket and one of his toys.” Eärendil quickly scanned 
Erestor’s rooms with his eyes and felt a bit worried, seeing the younger 
Elf had added nothing to the room. It was like no one lived here. Didn’t 
Erestor have any personal belongings?

Erestor gave in. “I will keep an eye on him, but I wonder what 
happened that the twins went separate ways.” 

Eärendil tucked the soft blanket around Elrond’s tiny form and his son 
immediately pulled it up to his shoulders. “I will allow this once, 
Elrond, but tomorrow night you have to sleep in the crib with your 
brother.”

Elrond pouted at first, but then accepted the marvelously colored 
Wentletrap shell his father gave him. He placed it against his ear and 
slowly fell asleep, listening to the calming sounds of the sea. 

“I do not think he will cause problems now that he is asleep, but taking 
him back to his crib would wake him again.” Eärendil smiled kindly, 
seeing the distress -- shock almost, in Erestor’s eyes. “You will get used 
to them sneaking into your bed. They might not have done it to you 
before, but my wife and I find them sleeping in between us on a regular 
base.”

“I will keep the door locked then.” The moment he had spoken the 
words, Erestor realized he had said the wrong thing – according to 
Eärendil at least. He could see the disappointment in the other Elf’s 
eyes, but why was it there? He quickly tried to explain, “Elwing and 
you are their parents. It is not right that Elrond comes to me instead.”

“Ah, is that it?” Eärendil finally began to understand. “We are not 
keeping score here, pen-neth. If Elrond prefers you to hold him 
tonight, I do not feel envious of his choice. He is a child and all 
children look for love and affection. I watched them when they were 
around you today. They like you, and Elrond especially is fond of you. 
Accept and enjoy their affection, Erestor. They give it because they 
want to, and Elwing and I know they do not love us less for liking you.”

Eärendil’s words slightly reassured Erestor and he felt he had to make 
some admission of his own. “I… never… I grew up alone. I was not 
allowed near my mother and… I do not even know if she is still alive. 
Elros and Elrond remind me of that. I want them to feel loved because I 
never did, but I do not want to take anything away from you. I feel… 
torn.”

“Don’t. There is no reason to feel like that. My wife already considers 
you part of our family and I think you know that as well. You just have 
a hard time accepting you found a place where you fit in, where you 
feel welcome and wanted. That will change with time. If my instincts 
are right, I reckon you never felt loved before and this is a novel 
experience.”

“Maglor cared about me. He made sure I got away from them… They 
weren’t kind.”

Eärendil nodded in understanding. “Some of Feanor’s offspring are as 
ill-tempered as he was.” He slowly walked back to the doorway, 
knowing Elrond safe and sound asleep. “I am leaving tomorrow and I 
want to ask you to look after Elwing as well. She tends to overestimate 
herself and then exhausts herself.”

“I will look after all three of them,” promised Erestor, surprised, but 
honored, that Eärendil thought he could take care of the sailor’s family. 
“I won’t disappoint you.”

“I know you won’t.” Eärendil closed the door behind him and returned 
to their bed, curling protectively around his wife and son, and quickly 
falling asleep.

Erestor rearranged Elrond in his arms until the small Elfling was 
perfectly comfortable. Doing something he had never done before, he 
pressed a chaste kiss on the child’s dark hair. “Sleep tight and may 
Elbereth grant you pleasant dreams.”

Erestor finally felt no longer alone; like he belonged. Maybe Eärendil 
was right and had he found the family he had always wanted. Sighing 
deeply, he already knew he would regret having to fall asleep without 
Elrond in his arms the next evening. 


TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine. 

Heart in Chains.
Part 4.


Elwing waved at her husband, when his ship -- the Vingilot -- 
disappeared at the horizon. She had hoped he would stay for a longer 
period of time, but his restlessness and the urge to find Valinor had 
gotten the better of him. She consoled herself with the fact that they’d 
had a few days of peace and happiness together. She rested her 
fingertips on the Silmaril -- the Nauglamir -- and gently caressed the 
perfect jewel, which she wore in a necklace beneath her clothes, 
hidden from curious eyes.
 
It was time to return to the house and let the twins distract her. At 
times she wondered if she would have survived being separated this 
often from her husband if he hadn’t given her the twins. The boys 
made her happy and filled her lonely days with mischief and love. And 
now she had Erestor’s company as well. She sincerely liked the dark-
haired Elf, but had also noticed how timid and uncertain he was. It 
made her wonder what had previously happened to him. Her husband 
had told her that he had written Maglor and she was now eagerly 
waiting for a reply.

Leaving the cliff she had been standing on, she returned to her house, 
and came upon Erestor and the twins in the gardens, where they were 
playing. She was relieved to see that Erestor had put them far away 
from the mud and Elros was behaving for a change. The boy probably 
missed his father already. /I need to cheer them up./

Erestor looked up at her when she came to a standstill in front of them. 
Her beauty always took his breath away. The long, dark hair, which 
she wore loose, danced on her back and her chocolate eyes also showed 
golden specks. Elrond and Elros were fortunate to have her for their 
mother. 

“Eärendil and I gathered sea shells last night,” she said, sitting on her 
heels next to Elrond, who loved to examine their texture and listen to 
the sea, echoing in the shells. “Would you like to see them?”

Elrond nodded at once. A serious expression – which seemed somewhat 
odd for one as young as he was – appeared on his face. He then reached 
for Erestor, awkwardly curled his arm around the Elf’s neck and clung 
to him, making it very clear that he wanted Erestor to carry him. 

Elwing smiled warmly and gathered Elros in her arms, whilst watching 
Erestor’s timid expression change into one of fear. /Elrond, you can 
sense it as well. Erestor needs your love more than I do at this 
moment./ She had realized long ago how sensitive and intelligent her 
youngest was. 

Erestor felt somewhat nervous, cradling Elrond against his chest. 
Eärendil might have told him that he didn’t mind that Elrond liked him 
that much, but he still felt like he was trespassing, taking something 
away from Elwing. 

“Erestor, follow me inside.” Elwing guided him into the kitchen, where 
Eärendil had deposited the bundle filled with seashells, which they had 
gathered last night. After sitting Elros down, Elwing opened the bundle 
and began to show the shells to her sons.

Elrond, who found it impossible to remain seated on Erestor’s lap, 
pushed himself to his feet and reached over the table to gather several 
shells in his tiny hand. 

Erestor smiled at Elrond’s eagerness and helped him, when several 
shells proved to be out of the twin’s reach. The pleased smile Elrond 
gave him made him feel warm inside, and when his gaze locked with 
Elwing’s, he saw approval in her dark eyes. She had accepted him as 
part of her little family and for that he would be eternally grateful.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Weeks passed by peacefully and consisted of caring for the twins. 
Erestor had fully settled into his new daily routine and was truly happy 
for the first time in his life.

He was also afraid it wouldn’t last.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor was on his way back from visiting the havens to buy several 
delicacies, which Elwing wanted to prepare for their next dinner when 
screams shattered the silence and made his worst nightmares come 
true. He started running toward the hill Elwing’s house was built upon 
and suddenly heard the terrified cries of the twins. Suddenly, mayhem 
erupted all around him.

From everywhere soldiers appeared, swarming the havens. A large 
group of them seemed concentrated around Elwing’s house and that 
made him increase his speed. He had no battle skills whatsoever, but he 
would die defending Elwing and the twins. 

Recognizing some of the guards he shivered with fearful anticipation. 
/What are Maglor’s guards doing here? And why are they attacking 
these good people? Elwing! Elrond, Elros! Hold on!/ 

He had no idea how to defend himself when he flung himself into 
battle. He grabbed a sword, which had fallen onto the floor and blindly 
hacked away at the soldiers that were targeting the inhabitants of the 
Havens. Some of them had come to Elwing’s rescue, but were now 
paying a high price for their willingness to help.

Erestor could hardly believe what he was seeing. Maedhros had just 
slain Elwing’s gardener and was now heading toward the twins, who 
were sitting huddled in the corner of the room, holding each other 
tightly. “Nay, leave them alone.” He hadn’t fully registered yet that he 
was about to attack Maedhros himself, when a sharp blow to the back 
of his head sent him crashing into the floor. Panting softly, he lay 
there, unable to move at all. 

A sea of screams erupted around him and the whimpers of the dying 
filled the kitchen area. He heard Elros wail pitifully and Erestor prayed 
to the Valar that the twins would remain uninjured. In the end, he lost 
his battle to remain consciousness.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When he woke next, the battle had long come to an end. Pushing 
himself onto his knees, he stared in horror at the dead bodies lying 
around him. Some belonged to Elves whom he had come to care for 
during these last few months. There was also Elwing’s gardener, the 
maid that sometimes assisted Elwing in the kitchens and…

His breath caught, recognizing two of Feanor’s sons. Amros and Amrod 
had been slain and a pool of blood had formed between the Elves’ 
bodies. Erestor’s eyes filled with tears. This was so wrong! Elves didn’t 
slay one another! How had this come to pass? And why had Maglor 
lead the attack?

Feeling nauseas at the sight of so many dead, he pushed himself to his 
feet, using his sword to support him. His gaze swiftly traveled to the 
corner of the room, hoping against all odds that the twins had been 
spared. But the blankets they had been sitting on were empty; the boys 
had been taken. He consoled himself with the fact that no blood 
showed on the fabric. Maybe Maglor had managed to stop more 
bloodshed and had taken the twins into his custody. /I hope so. I 
cannot believe Maglor is capable of murdering two innocent children./

Feeling sick to his stomach, he made his way through the kitchen and 
headed for Elwing’s room. He had to know what had happened to her. 
/Please, Elbereth, let her be alive!/ Someone as sweet and caring as 
Elwing didn’t deserve such cruel a fate. Opening the door to her room, 
he involuntarily halted in his tracks, whilst his eyes searched the room. 
There was no sign of Elwing and there weren’t any bloodstains either. 
He had to believe that she had somehow escaped. 

“Aiya, Elbereth, why did you let this happen?” Now that he was back 
in the corridor, he had to carefully step over the dead bodies in order to 
make his way to the living area. He didn’t want to go there, but the 
healer in him urged him to check if anyone had survived. By using his 
healing powers he might be able to save a life. 

When he came upon Rhoss’ body, he released a pained whimper. They 
hadn’t even spared their own! Crushed by this revelation, he collapsed 
onto his knees next to Rhoss’ body. He forced himself to calm down 
and his eyes widened, realizing the guard was still breathing shallowly. 
“Aiya, maybe I can help!”

Sweeping back the guard’s long auburn hair, he gasped loudly, finding 
the blade of a dagger deeply buried in the guard’s chest. /If I remove it, 
he will lose even more blood. Blood, which he can ill afford to lose!/ 
Torn, he curled his fingers around the hilt, keeping it in place. 

“Rhoss? Can you hear me?” He searched the guard’s face, whilst he 
ensured the dagger remained deeply lodged in Rhoss’ chest. He had to 
guide his healing energy into the Elf’s body before he could even think 
about removing the dagger. “Rhoss? Meldir? Please talk to me?” He 
needed someone to reassure him in this hour of madness.

Rhoss managed to focus his gaze on Erestor and his heart was weighed 
down, seeing the younger Elf’s pain and horror. He wished he could do 
something to soothe Erestor, but the call of Mandos was growing 
stronger and he would enter the Great Halls in seconds. There was 
nothing he could do to comfort Erestor. As his eyes closed in death, he 
hoped Erestor would find the strength to survive this ordeal.

“Nay! You cannot leave me alone!” Shocked to see the guard’s inner 
light go out, Erestor fastened his hold on the dagger. “I won’t let you 
die!” But he was too late. Rhoss was already dead. He hung his head, 
grieving for his friend’s death, when the door was slammed open. A 
silver-haired Elf, dressed in silver and gray, advanced on him, aiming 
an arrow at his heart. The newcomer’s eyes flashed with anger and 
loathing, and Erestor realized that very moment which conclusion the 
other had reached.

He immediately let go of the hilt of the dagger and tried to explain. “I 
did nothing! I merely tried to help!” Despair washed over him, reading 
the hatred and distrust in the other’s eyes. “You have to believe me! I 
found him like this!”

“Keep your lying tongue in check,” growled Orophin. He had been the 
first of the rescue party to reach Elwing’s house, and although he was 
still shocked at finding a massacre had taken place, he tried to remain 
calm and controlled. “I should end your life, kinslayer, but I won’t 
stoop to your level. Rise from the floor and stay close to the wall, or I 
will bury my arrow in your chest.”

Too shocked to protest, Erestor obeyed. The sword he had been holding 
crashed onto the floor with a loud bang and he raised his hands, trying 
to plead with the silver-haired Elf. But then Erestor froze, finding that 
the hand that had held the dagger in place was covered with Rhoss’ 
blood. It was during that terrible moment that Erestor realized no one 
would ever believe him that he was innocent. “It is not what it looks 
like!”

“Keep your lies to yourself,” spat Orophin in loathing. He was under 
strict orders from his Lord not to take any lives, but right now, he 
wouldn’t mind ending this kinslayer’s life. The dark-haired Elf 
deserved to die!

“Orophin!” Rumil now joined his brother and stared in disbelief at the 
corpse at his feet. Then his gaze settled on Erestor –and the 
bloodstained hand. “Muindor-nîn, (brother-mine), what do you want 
me to do?”

The house was now swarming with silver-haired Elves, who were 
checking for survivors. Erestor wanted to tell Orophin again that he 
was innocent, but was stopped when a strong fist crushed into his face. 
He went down to his knees, but did not lose consciousness. His hands 
were bound tightly behind him and a bloodstained piece of cloth was 
pushed into his mouth, gagging him. His blurry eyes pleaded with the 
two Elves who now dragged him between them, but seeing their 
determined expression he knew convincing them of his innocence was 
impossible.

He was thrown onto the grass and when he looked up, he found he had 
been flung between the remains of Maglor’s guards. Even Amrod and 
Amros’ bodies had been gathered on this pile. 

Shaking like a leaf and fearing for his life, he watched quietly as two 
new Elves appeared to his right. One of them was a she-Elf of 
incredible beauty and she vaguely seemed familiar to him. Her cold 
eyes reminded him of Feanor’s and he quickly shifted his gaze to the 
Elf standing next her. This Elf’s eyes showed compassion, regret and 
immense sorrow. Erestor bowed his head, unable to look at them any 
longer whilst his fate remained uncertain. What would they do to him?

“My Lord Celeborn? My Lady? Most of the kinslayers were already 
dead or have fled, but we found one alive.” 

Erestor looked up at hearing the strained voice. A third Elf now stood 
with Orophin and Rumil. His long, silver hair glowed with Arien’s 
light and the hazel eyes were swimming with tears. 

“Elwing and the twins are nowhere to be found. We must assume they 
were taken by Maglor.” Haldir tried to sound and appear distant and 
detached, but knew his eyes were giving his fierce emotions away. “My 
brother Orophin came upon this one,” and he pointed at Erestor, “who 
was still driving a dagger into the heart of one of Elwing’s personal 
guards. We await your judgment. What punishment do you deem 
suitable for such horrible a crime?”

Erestor’s heart pounded madly and in his despair, he managed to spit 
out the cloth that had kept him from talking. Before any of the silver-
haired Elves could react, he pleaded urgently. “My Lord, my Lady, I 
had nothing to do with this slaying, Please enter my mind and 
convince yourself that I am innocent! Argh!” A boot crashed into his 
back and sent him crouching onto the grass. He was grabbed hard from 
behind and the gag was put back in place.

“This won’t happen again,” promised Haldir, upset that their prisoner 
had dared to address his Lord and Lady in that manner.

Galadriel glared at Erestor before addressing him. “I refuse to defile 
myself with your horrid memories, kinslayer. Keep them to yourself.”

Her chilling words crushed the little hope he had still left inside him. 
/They will condemn me for this. Will she order me killed?/ Gagged, all 
he could do was stare at her pleadingly. 

“Husband,” Galadriel said, “What punishment do you deem just?” 

Celeborn, still taken aback by the slaughter that had taken place, forced 
himself to react. It was beyond him how one Elf could slay another. All 
he knew was that this had to stop. “We will not slay one of our own.” 

Galadriel’s eyes narrowed at that. “Death would be just punishment for 
what he did.”

“Nay, I won’t allow it,” said Celeborn steadfast. “The slaying will end 
here. We have to show that we are better than them. We must set an 
example.”

Galadriel seemed displeased, but didn’t openly object to her husband’s 
decision. “Life-long imprisonment, then.”

Saying ‘aye’ greatly burdened Celeborn’s soul, but he agreed to her 
ruling. “This one will be our responsibility from now on.” Looking 
about, he called the three brothers to him. “Haldir, Orophin, Rumil. It 
will be your task to guard this Elf. Make sure he does not flee. He is to 
be imprisoned for the rest of his life and you will act as his guards.” 

Erestor’s world shattered into small pieces when Celeborn passed his 
judgment. /Nay, I did not kill Rhoss! I tried to help!/

“My Lord? We found one more of Feanor’s men. He is dying, but 
maybe you would like to talk to him.” One of the silver-haired sentries 
had brought the dying Noldorin Elf and now placed him at Celeborn’s 
feet.

Erestor’s eyes widened, recognizing the soldier as one of Celegorm’s 
confidants. When Celegorm had died, his men had joined Maglor’s. 
/And he knows me…  I can see it in his eyes. What will he say?/ His 
heart thundered madly, hoping the guard would speak the truth in his 
dying hour. 

Celeborn glared at the dying Noldorin Elf. “Why?”

“The Silmaril… It belongs to us.” Celegorm’s former confidant panted 
hard. Losing interest in Celeborn, his gaze settled on Erestor. “Ah, it 
has been a long time since we met, Erestor.”

Celeborn’s eyes narrowed. “You know him?”

“Finwe adopted him when he married Indis. Erestor is the son of her 
oldest sister… Kin!” he spat the word in disgust, recalling that Erestor 
and his mother had tried to flee. And now he had one last chance to 
make Erestor’s life even more miserable. “Erestor is Maglor’s right 
hand… His second in command…” His strength was leaving him fast, 
but he found delight in the fact that he had utterly ruined Erestor’s life.

Celeborn watched silently as the soldier released his last breath. Now 
that the guard was dead, he concentrated on Erestor again. “You are 
Finwe’s kin… and Feanor’s.” They had to be even more careful around 
Erestor now. Luckily Haldir and his brothers were excellent fighters. 
Looking Haldir in the eye, he said, “Guard him carefully.”

“We will,” replied Haldir. He wasn’t looking forward to carrying out 
his new task, but would do as Celeborn had bid. “He will pay for his 
foul deed for the rest of his life.”

Overwhelmed by everything that had happened to him, Erestor began 
to rock himself, sobbing softly. He hated showing his weakness, but his 
life had just been ruined. Never again would he experience happiness 
or bliss. /Aiya, Elwing, I hope you and your sons survived./

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Kinslayer…”

“Murderer!”

Erestor had long lowered his gaze and now stared at the ground, whilst 
Haldir and his brothers dragged him to a certain section of the 
improvised camp. Eyes filled with hatred were trained on him and he 
tried to make himself as small as possible when Orophin forced him 
onto his knees to tie his hands to a post that had been driven in the 
ground behind him. Bound and helpless, he listened closely, hearing 
Haldir move away from him.

No one interfered when the warriors began to spit at him in disgust. 
The occasional boot impacted with his back, making him flinch in pain. 

But Haldir, Orophin and Rumil looked the other way as long as their 
prisoner wasn’t seriously injured. Their rulers’ verdict had been clear. 
Erestor was to stay alive, but imprisoned, and they couldn’t blame some 
of their fellows for feeling the way they did. Seeing so many Elves slain 
had enraged them and Erestor deserved to be punished for his part in 
the slaughter.

Erestor tried to curl up, but as his hands were tied to the wooden post, 
his space was limited, and in the end, he endured the enforced 
humiliation. His head bowed, he tried to recall Elwing’s soft voice, 
singing a lullaby to her sons. He had to survive… Somehow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next few days were hellish for Erestor. His hands remained tied 
and Orophin held the end of the rope in his hands, whilst driving his 
horse to greater speed. Having to run along was exhausting Erestor and 
he wasn’t sure how much longer he could endure this treatment.

At night, when the party made camp, he was given a small amount of 
water and some lembas to keep him alive, but he was forbidden to 
address his jailors. That first night, he had tried one more time to 
convince Orophin that the silver-haired Elf had reached the wrong 
conclusion, but the sentry had brutally pushed the gag back in place 
before he’d had the chance to drink his daily water ration.

Despair had long overwhelmed him and he realized that he would 
never taste freedom again. He had no idea where they were headed, 
but Celeborn and Galadriel had made it very clear that he was to 
remain with them for the rest of his life. They would make sure he 
never left and suffered in solitude. 

His life would be a lonely one, with only misery keeping him company. 
Closing his eyes, he tried to shut out their voices, which were still 
calling him a kinslayer. Maybe he could lose himself inside his mind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Celeborn and Galadriel settled down, erecting a temporary structure to 
house their people and he was confined to a room. At first he had 
wanted to rebel and protest to this injustice, but he quickly realized 
how useless that was. Their minds were set in stone, determined to 
make him pay for a crime he had never committed.

His three jailors hardly spoke with him and after a while, he grew used 
to the silence that surrounded him. At nights, he would dream of the 
twins, and listen to their happy giggling. Waking up each morning was 
pure torture, however.

After long years, Celeborn and Galadriel moved to another place, but 
his treatment remained the same. Year after year he spent in solitude, 
eating just enough to stay alive. As he was denied any distraction, he 
would sit in front of the only window of his room and stare outside, 
recalling the happy weeks, which he had spent with Elwing and the 
twins.

When Celeborn and Galadriel finally moved to Caras Galadhon, he 
quickly realized they planned to stay there. High in a mallorn tree, 
they confined him to his talan. Each morning one of the three bothers 
relieved the other, guarding him closely. 

He lost track of time, and the only thing that told him that time was 
passing, was seeing the seasons change. He especially loved winter, 
when a virgin white blanket would cover the lands. He could stare at 
the dancing snowflakes for hours and it was his only joy in these 
endless years.

Finally, he gave up all hope, resigning himself to the fact that he would 
never be free again. During many nights, he found himself wishing he 
had died alongside Rhoss, and that he hadn’t visited the market that 
day. But the Valar had decided differently, condemning him to this 
mockery of life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor sat staring at the ancient trees, watching two birds building a 
nest. Spring had made the flowers blossom and Arien warmed Middle-
Earth. It truly was the time to fall in love, build a nest, and raise little 
ones.

But not for him. Eternal winter remained in his heart. 

Erestor was therefore shocked to see Galadriel and Celeborn enter his 
room unannounced. The two rulers seemed troubled, although they 
were doing their best to hide it from him. He forced himself to rise 
from his chair and to bow deeply. It had been ages since they had 
visited with him. When they had last, it had been to inform him that 
Lothlorien would be his prison for the rest of his life.

“Erestor, there is something we need to discuss with you.” Celeborn 
wasn’t sure this was the right decision, but they didn’t have a choice. 
During one of those first years of Erestor’s imprisonment, the dark-
haired Elf had displayed impressive healing powers when a maiden had 
taken a fall. He had healed her and from that moment on, Galadriel had 
monitored him closely. Celeborn had sensed her interest in him, and 
knew she would use Erestor in whatever way she deemed necessary. 

“Of course, my Lord.” His seldom used voice sounded alien to Erestor, 
as he stared at the floor, unwilling to meet their eyes. His skin crawled, 
like it always did when Galadriel was near. 

Her soft, melodic voice suddenly floated through the room. “Would 
you like more privileges? Access to our library and the occasional stroll 
outside?”

Erestor’s eyes widened, and then he did look at her, but he wished he 
hadn’t. Her blue eyes were as cold as ice. “Aye, I would like more 
privileges.” But at what price would they come?

“Elrond Half-Elven, Gil-galad’s Herald, is grieving for the High-King’s 
death,” said Celeborn unexpectedly. 

Erestor flinched, recalling holding Elrond when the Elfing would sneak 
into his bed. “I regret hearing that.”

“We already lost Gil-galad,” continued Celeborn calmly, “And we 
cannot afford to lose the Peredhel as well.”

Erestor had heard Gil-galad had fallen when defeating Sauron and like 
the others, he grieved for the High-King. But why were they now 
discussing this with him? /They want something from me./

“You are a healer,” started Galadriel, “As well as a kinslayer. But this 
time, you might use your powers for good instead of evil.”

Flinching at her cruel words, Erestor averted his eyes. He had long 
stopping trying to convince them of his innocence. “I will help in 
whatever way I can.”

“Elrond is fading because he grieves for his King… and lover,” said 
Galadriel, who carefully observed Erestor’s reaction.

/Lover?/ That idea was hard to reconcile with the fact that Erestor still 
remembered Elrond as a tiny Elfling. 

“He will leave for the Great Halls of Waiting and we cannot allow 
that.” Galadriel took up pacing the room. “Elrond has lost his 
connection to life and we need to provide him with a new one. We 
cannot allow him to fade as we will need him in the future.”
 
Erestor’s stomach did a sickening somersault. What was it that she 
wanted?

“You are a gifted healer and your life energy could sustain Elrond, 
provide him with a link to Arda,” said Galadriel calmly. “We want you 
to bind yourself to Elrond.”

Erestor gasped in shock, seeking out Celeborn’s eyes, which were more 
compassionate than Galadriel’s. “What?”

“You will bind yourself to him and your life energy will help him 
recover.” Galadriel’s voice hardened. “In order to create this tight and 
unbreakable bond you will submit to him… physically. Elrond is 
yearning for his lover and will mistake you for him. He will use your 
body in whatever way he deems necessary. A bond, formed in that 
manner, is unbreakable.”

Erestor wrung his hands. “But…” What Galadriel proposed was a 
monstrosity!

“Elrond will never learn of your existence. He will recover, grow 
strong and fulfill his destiny.” Galadriel’s eyes burned with 
determination. “In return for your services we will allow you access to 
the library and a bit more personal freedom.”

Celeborn cleared his throat; he didn’t completely agree with his wife’s 
plans. “Your pain will be brief, and after you return here, you will find 
ample distraction.” He had tried to convince Galadriel to send Erestor 
as Elrond’s official new consort, but she had replied it would be too 
much honor for a kinslayer. 

Erestor’s head reeled with their request. /I would bind myself to Elrond 
for all eternity and he would never know about it./ 

“Will you comply?” Galadriel’s eyes probed Erestor’s.

Erestor sighed distressed. A long time ago he had promised himself to 
protect Elwing and the twins in Eärendil’s absence. After all what had 
happened, how could he not stay true to his word? “I will do it,” he said 
in a resigned voice. “I will bind myself to him.”

Galadriel’s eyes glowed victoriously, whilst Celeborn’s shone with sad 
compassion.

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine. 

Heart in Chains.
Part 5. 


Ithil shone with unrivaled brilliance that night, giving Elves and Men a 
chance to bury their dead and care for the wounded. Several shelters 
and tents had arisen where healers and soldiers were trying to ease the 
pain of their injured comrades. The Battle of the Last Alliance had 
come to an end and they had won, defeating Sauron.

But the price had been high.

Cirdan had retreated into the tent Elrond and Gil-galad used to share. 
The High-King had died and his Herald was about to follow Gil-galad 
to the Great Halls of Waiting. 

Cirdan’s right hand rested on Elrond’s clammy brow, concerned now 
that the half-Elf felt as cold as ice. The gray eyes were motionless and 
Elrond’s breathing was growing shallower. They were running out of 
time. How could he possibly convince Elrond to return to them?

Elrond had gone into shock when the battle had come to an end. They 
had been victorious, but they had lost Gil-galad and Cirdan hoped they 
would be able to reclaim Elrond for the living instead of having to bury 
the half-Elf as well.

“You must fight, mellon.” Cirdan rubbed the icy brow, hoping for some 
sign that Elrond was coming around, but nothing happened. Worried, 
he pulled the blanket that covered the half-Elf’s naked body up to 
Elrond’s shoulders, tucking the fabric around his friend’s form. “What 
do I do, should you die? It cannot be your fate to die today.”

He had undressed Elrond after carrying the half-Elf to the tent. His 
charge’s clothes had been drenched in blood and the armor would be 
uncomfortable when lying down. Once Elrond had been naked, he had 
used a blanket to keep him warm. But now his efforts to save Gil-
galad’s Herald – and lover – seemed to have been in vain. Elrond 
refused to return to consciousness. 

“I know you loved him, meldir. We all did. But your love went 
deeper.” And Gil-galad had returned that love. Elrond and the High-
King had been happy during these last few days, but Cirdan had seen 
the apprehension in the half-Elf’s knowing, gray eyes. Elrond had 
known their time was limited and had tried to make the best of their 
time together. 

“Elrond, we cannot lose you as well. We need you!” Cirdan hoped 
Elrond would listen to him, but the half-Elf remained motionless. /He 
is fading, and fading fast./ Death was swiftly approaching. “And then 
we have to do without the both of you.”

His hand left Elrond’s brow and now took the half-Elf’s right hand in 
his. “You have to listen to me. Gil-galad would want you to fight and 
overcome this. Please, mellon.”

He continued his pleading for a few more minutes and then gave up. 
Elrond wasn’t responding and fighting at his King’s side had drained 
Cirdan. He wanted to lie down and rest, but he had one more battle to 
fight. They couldn’t lose Elrond!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Glorfindel, who had taken up position outside Elrond’s tent, raised an 
eyebrow when a party of four riders came to a standstill before him. He 
recognized one of them and wondered what Haldir, one of Celeborn’s 
personal guards, was doing here. 

Haldir dismounted, gathered his cloak around him and handed 
Glorfindel a scroll, which carried Celeborn and Galadriel’s seal. 
“Glorfindel, my Lord asked me to ensure you read this.” Nervously, 
Haldir’s gaze traveled to the one Elf that was still on horseback, whilst 
Rumil and Orophin also dismounted. Rumil had a tight hold on the 
reins, making sure the hooded Elf couldn’t leave.

Glorfindel also kept one eye on the hooded rider whilst unrolling the 
scroll. He instantly recognized Celeborn’s elegant handwriting. 
Apparently word of Gil-galad’s demise had spread quickly and 
Galadriel had decided to send a healer to help Elrond recover. /So this 
hooded rider is a healer?/ After reading the message, he considered 
everything he had learned. 

“I assure you that my Lady Galadriel only wants to help,” said Haldir 
softly. He had heard many tales of valor and bravery where Glorfindel 
was concerned, and he felt somewhat intimidated, knowing whom he 
was dealing with. “My brothers and I are acting as his personal guards. 
We traveled without rest to get here in time.”

Glorfindel drew in a deep breath. “Wait here,” he said, addressing 
Haldir. Then he vanished into the tent. 

Cirdan looked up, when Glorfindel entered. “I asked you to give us a 
moment alone.”

Remaining quiet, Glorfindel handed Cirdan the scroll. “Just read.”

Cirdan read Celeborn’s letter and then his gaze returned to his charge. 
“I cannot reach him. Elrond is drifting away from us, searching for his 
lover.”

“What do we have to lose?” Glorfindel shared Cirdan’s worries. They 
had already lost Gil-galad and couldn’t afford to lose Elrond as well. 
“Shall I tell the healer to attend to Elrond?”

Cirdan – fatigued and feeling helpless – let go of Elrond’s hand and rose 
from the bed. “Aye, tell him to enter.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor was fighting his panic to his best ability. He had agreed, but 
that didn’t mean he wanted to do this. Being bound to Elrond Half-
Elven, Gil-galad’s Herald, was a frightening prospect, but the rewards 
Galadriel had offered had been too good to decline. In exchange for 
saving Elrond, he would be allowed outside once a week and Galadriel 
would give him unlimited access to the library. After the life he had 
led, that sounded like pure luxury.

He could sense their eyes on him. Haldir, Rumil and Orophin’s eyes 
never left him and he recalled that they were under orders to end his 
life if he tried to flee. But escape was not on his mind right now. 
Around him, Elves and Men were in pain and the sense of 
abandonment around him was suffocating. As a healer, he desperately 
wanted to help, but he waited for Haldir to tell him to dismount. He 
didn’t want to end up with an arrow in his back.

Suddenly, the blond, which Haldir had addressed as Glorfindel 
returned and nodded his head once. 

“Your healer may enter.”

Erestor held his breath. This was it. His panic increased, but he 
managed to keep it under control. After locking gazes with Haldir and 
obtaining permission, he dismounted, making sure the hood stayed in 
place. Slipping his hands into the sleeves of his robes, he waited for 
Haldir’s orders.

Another Elf now also left the tent and Erestor stared at him in surprise. 
Never before had he seen a bearded Elf. 

“I am Cirdan, one of Elrond’s friends.” 

Erestor didn’t know what to say and simply waited. 

“I gather you are a healer?”

Nodding once, Erestor wondered what would happen next. 

“I will take you to Elrond,” said Cirdan, pulling back the flap of the tent 
to let Erestor enter. “And I will stay with you.”

“Nay,” said Haldir firmly. “My Lord Celeborn clearly states that the 
healer needs to attend to Elrond alone.”

Glorfindel and Cirdan had also read that passage, but didn’t feel 
inclined to permit it.

“My Lords, you have to trust us. We want to save Lord Elrond’s life. 
That is why we are here. That is why we brought this healer.” Haldir 
hoped they would cooperate.

After a moment’s thought, Cirdan reluctantly agreed. Seeing 
Glorfindel’s suspicious expression, he saw his own unease reflected in 
them. “Haldir is right. We need to put our trust in Galadriel and 
Celeborn. They know what they are doing.”

Erestor released the breath he had been holding when he finally 
stepped into the tent – toward his destiny. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gingerly, Erestor looked about. To his right, on a cot, was Elrond Half-
Elven. Memories of tending to the mischievous twins when they had 
been Elflings returned to him. He had found Elrond adorable back then 
and the child had been smitten with him in turn, but now Elrond was a 
great warrior. A warrior who was mourning his lover’s death. And 
there was only one way to keep the half-Elf from following Gil-galad to 
the Halls of Waiting. 

After drawing in a deep breath, he dropped his cloak onto the ground. 
A bowl filled with water had been placed aside Elrond, and the silvery 
surface  caught his reflection. His long, dark hair was unbraided as 
always, and his brown eyes filled with panic. The blue paint, which 
Galadriel had used, covered the area around his eyes, making it look 
like part of his face was veiled. All this to ensure no one ever found out 
his identity. 

Making his way toward the cot, he extinguished all candles that 
formerly illuminated the tent. When he reached the cot, he sat down 
on the chair Cirdan had vacated. Taking a moment to study the half-
Elf, he realized that Elrond was handsome, even with the touch of 
death upon him. The long, raven hair carried warrior’s braids and dried 
Orc blood tainted the slightly tanned skin. The gray eyes were devoid 
of emotion and yet the healer in him sensed the presence in the 
seemingly unconscious half-Elf. 

Did he have the courage to follow through? He had told Galadriel he 
would bind himself to Elrond and by doing so ensure the half-Elf’s 
survival, but he couldn’t help feeling sorry for himself. Elrond would 
never find out who had saved him and the bond wouldn’t stop the 
Herald from finding a new lover, as the half-Elf wouldn’t even know 
he was bound.

But for him, the situation would be different. For the rest of his life he 
would feel Elrond’s pain, and lend him strength when the half-Elf 
needed his support. But in return he hoped to regain a tiny bit of his 
freedom, if Galadriel kept her word. 

Resting a shaky hand on Elrond’s brow, he felt the half-Elf’s impending 
death. Instinctively he tried to stop the cold from claiming Elrond, 
pushing the alien presence away with his own mind. Having reclaimed 
Elrond for now, he rose from the chair, undid the belt that held his 
robes together and shrugged out of them. They pooled at his feet and 
stepping out of them, he centered himself. He needed to form this bond 
now. 

Erestor saw a small, ceremonial knife on the small desk next to the bed 
and took hold of it. Cutting his wrist deeply, he detachedly watched 
the blood flow down his hand. His blood would form this link and give 
the half-Elf the strength to survive. 

Reverently, he knelt next to the bed. His wrist now hovered above 
Elrond’s mouth and a few drops of his blood slid passed the open lips, 
flowing down the half-Elf’s throat. Now that he had set the process in 
motion, he waited for Elrond to react, whilst wrapping a piece of cloth 
around his wrist. He knew what would happen next and feared the act, 
but he had committed himself to this and there was no turning back.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Elrond panted hard, as a metallic tasting liquid flowed down his throat. 
His body was slowly coming alive again, and with it the horrid 
memories. “Ereinion!” The last thing he recalled was seeing his lover 
burned to cinders by Sauron, but then warm and inviting arms 
enfolded him, rocking him comfortingly and he leaned into the 
embrace. 

“Melamin!” Gil-galad was alive then, because no one else would dare 
hold him like that. Elrond nearly panicked. Why was it this dark? Why 
couldn’t he see? “Where am I?”

“In your tent.”

The voice sounded alien and familiar at the same time. “Melamin?” It 
had to be Ereinion! His lover hadn’t deserted him after all! Gil-galad 
had tricked Sauron and hadn’t died! Ereinion was still with him. 

“Hush now, and do not worry. Everything will be well.”

“Why is it this dark? Why can I not see you?” Elrond’s hands reached 
for the warm form next to him. The only thing he could think of was 
making sure that his lover hadn’t left him. “I had such a bad dream.” 
Now that the war was over, he needed to know his lover was still his!

Elrond grabbed the other Elf tightly, and encountering only bare skin, 
he sighed blissfully. Ereinion had had the same idea then and wanted to 
make love with him. “I need you, melamin. I need to know you are still 
here with me.” Saying those words would signal to Gil-galad what he 
needed most; to be inside the High-King. For one moment he felt 
confused, seeing brown eyes in a sea of blue. 

His bed partner struggled briefly, which puzzled Elrond, but then a 
smile surfaced on his face. Ereinion was a passionate lover, who was 
mostly on top, but there were times when the High-King wanted to be 
claimed in turn, but would put up a fight first. The few times that Gil-
galad was on the receiving end of his passion, the High King preferred 
to be taken hard. It seemed this was such a moment and he was happy 
to oblige. /Ah, you probably already prepared yourself for me./

Overcome with need and passion, Elrond brought his arms up behind 
his lover’s back, and after rolling the Elf onto his stomach, he blanketed 
him. “Mine, you are mine. You will always be mine. And I know what 
you want, for I want it too!”

Pulling his partner onto his hands and knees, he positioned himself at 
the tight entrance. Without thinking logically -- overwhelmed by 
desperate need and convinced that his lover had already prepared 
himself for some rough lovemaking – he pushed inside. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor never expected Elrond to react with such violence. Before he 
knew what was happening, he found himself on his stomach and then 
on all fours. He had known this would happen, but the suddenness and 
force that the half-Elf displayed made him panic. He struggled briefly 
but stopped all movement when Elrond began to enter him. The hot 
head of the other’s sex nudged against his entrance, and he tried to 
mentally prepare himself for the penetration, but he had no idea what 
to expect. Suddenly, he was being burned and the pain that shot 
through him was like nothing he had ever felt before. 

Elrond’s hard flesh forced its way into his body, tearing him in the 
process. Helpless to stop the half-Elf, Erestor bit into the pillow to 
muffle his cries, not wanting anyone to enter and find him in this 
humiliating position. Just when he thought that the pain couldn’t be 
worse, the half-Elf began to thrust. 

Tears of pain fled his eyes and dripped down his face. He had 
involuntary tensed, trying to expel the intruder, but this caused him 
only more pain. Biting down harder, he forced himself to endure 
Elrond’s strokes, which now gained in speed and intensity. The sound 
of flesh against flesh -- Elrond’s heavy sacs slapping against his buttocks 
-- made him nauseous and he swallowed convulsively, trying to keep 
himself from throwing up the little he had eaten. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Aye, meleth-nîn, I knew you would never leave me.” Elrond 
continued to drive himself home into his lover’s body, savoring the 
tight glove around him. It had been some time since he had last 
claimed the High-King and his lover felt as tight as the first time he had 
taken him. Pounding hard, he bit into his lover’s neck, finally reaching 
orgasm. 

The moment he spilled his seed in his lover’s body, something changed. 
Warmth was born inside his heart and a glow seemed to engulf his 
body. Had he finally turned delirious after all?

Exhausted, he thrust one last time and then collapsed on top of his 
lover’s body. “Aiya, you are so tight, Ereinion.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hot tears of pain, shame and utter humiliation dripped from Erestor’s 
face as he laid there, feeling abused and hurting in places he had never 
known existed. Elrond felt heavy on top of him and he wondered what 
to do. Suddenly, the half-Elf pulled out and a slicing pain moved 
through his lower body, making him bury his teeth into his knuckles to 
keep himself from screaming out in pain. 

Erestor now also felt the bond that had been forged. He even sensed 
the half-Elf’s ecstasy, which was still mixed with a hint of despair. 
Then, a sigh left Elrond’s lips and the half-Elf slipped into a healing 
sleep, which was being fed with Erestor’s life energy. 

In shock, Erestor bit down his pain, managing to roll away from 
underneath Elrond. After fighting down the urge to curl up in a fetal 
position, Erestor gingerly studied the one he was now bound to. The 
half-Elf looked different and he instinctively knew that Elrond would 
survive and eventually recover. /You will never know I am bound to 
you and for that I am grateful./ What good would it do Elrond to know 
he was bound to such a pitiful creature?

Following his instincts, he placed his hands on Elrond’s brow. He 
closed his eyes and directed his remaining energy into the half-Elf’s fëa. 
When he had given as much as he could without extinguishing his own 
inner light, he let his hands fall down onto the bed. Panting due to 
exhaustion, he imprinted Elrond’s features in his mind. He would never 
see Elrond again and the half-Elf would be the only ‘lover’ he would 
ever have. For one moment he felt disappointed that this would be his 
sole sexual encounter, but now that he knew how much pain was 
involved in this act, the last thing he desired was being subjected to it 
again. 

It was time to leave and he pushed himself into a sitting position. He 
gasped in pain, and his eyes widened, realizing he was bleeding 
between his legs. Elrond had torn him. 

Gritting his teeth, he managed to get to his feet, but he swayed and had 
to reach for support, or else he would have fallen. Shaking like a leaf, 
he bent to pick up his robes. He nearly doubled over in agony and cried 
hot tears when more warm blood dripped down his thighs. 

With grim determination, he slipped into his robes, fastened them with 
the belt and then draped his cloak over his shoulders. After putting up 
the hood, he took a few shaky steps toward the exit. He felt utterly 
humiliated now that the half-Elf had made him bleed, but wasn’t that 
to be expected? Galadriel had warned him that Elrond would use him 
as the half-Elf saw fit. He should console himself with the fact that he 
would never have to undergo such humiliation again. 

Finally, he stepped out into the open. He avoided looking at them, not 
wanting to meet anyone’s eyes accidentally. He slowly made his way to 
his horse, hoping he would be able to ride back to ‘Lorien without 
Haldir or his brothers finding out that he was injured.

Mounting his horse took his last strength, but he managed. Now that 
he was sitting on the horse’s back, the pain in his lower body increased 
tenfold and he nearly fainted. His shoulders slumped and he bowed his 
head in defeat, waiting for Haldir to mount as well. The trip back to 
Lothlorien would be nothing but torment.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cirdan and Glorfindel exchanged a worried look when the healer 
reappeared. Both smelled the metallic tang of blood on him and 
wondered what had happened. Cirdan was the first to leave the ‘Lorien 
party and disappear into the tent. 

Haldir, who had seen Erestor’s hesitant movement, mounted quickly. “I 
am sure Lord Elrond will recover now. Should you need the healer’s 
services again, please send word to the Lord or Lady.” He turned his 
horse around and signaled for his brothers to follow him. Rumil had 
once more claimed the reins of Erestor’s horse to make sure their 
prisoner couldn’t escape.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Glorfindel watched until the party had vanished from sight and then 
ventured into the tent, wondering in what state he would find Elrond.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The first thing Glorfindel noticed was the blood that clung to Elrond’s 
lips. The half-Elf was tucked away beneath a blanket, apparently still 
asleep. The Elda came to a standstill beside Cirdan and looked at him 
questioningly. “What happened here?”

Cirdan’s brow was knitted. “When I entered I found that all candles 
had been extinguished and I had to relight them. It was dark in here 
when I entered.” 

“What about the blood?” Glorfindel touched a finger to Elrond’s lips. 
“It is fresh.”

Cirdan seated himself on the chair and studied his charge. “Something 
about him is different.” 

Glorfindel had to agree. “’Tis a healing sleep now.” The emptiness in 
the gray eyes had vanished. He studied Elrond, wondering how the 
healer had accomplished this. 

Unexpectedly, Elrond’s eyelids fluttered, announcing the half-Elf’s 
return to consciousness.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Elrond felt disorientated, but seeing the faces of his two best friends 
reassured him. “Cirdan? Glorfindel?” With difficulty, he pushed 
himself in an upright position and his eyes immediately searched for 
his lover. “Where is Ereinion?”

Cirdan released a distressed sigh. “He died, meldir.”

Elrond’s eyes widened at hearing this. Aye, he remembered but… “He 
was here a moment ago! I made lo—“ His voice faltered, mid-sentence. 
“It cannot have been a hallucination! He was here!”

“Mellon, can you tell me why there is blood on your lips?” Cirdan’s 
concern returned, seeing the wild expression in his friend’s gray eyes. 

“Blood?” Confused, Elrond raised a hand and touched his lips. His 
fingers came away stained with blood. “I do not understand.”

“I wonder what that healer did,” mumbled Glorfindel, intrigued. 

“Healer? What healer?” Elrond frowned deeply, recalling what had 
happened a few moments ago. He had made love to Gil-galad! 
“Ereinion is not here?”

“He is dead, Elrond. You must accept that.” Cirdan’s voice was laced 
with comfort.
 
“Then who…?” Elrond’s eyes narrowed. “May I have a moment alone? 
I need to compose myself.” 

Glorfindel nodded once, judging his friend sane and alert enough to 
take care of himself. The change that had taken place inside Elrond was 
truly remarkable. “Mellon, let us give him some privacy to mourn his 
lover’s demise.”

Cirdan gave in and followed the blond outside. 

Elrond stayed behind, feeling shocked. He had made love to Ereinion; 
he hadn’t imagined that! He had been inside his lover, had felt how 
tight the High-King was! But…

/He did not reach orgasm./ His lover’s inner muscle hadn’t milked him 
dry! Thoroughly confused, he pushed down the covers. Shocked, he 
stared at his flaccid member – and the blood that clung to it.

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine.

Heart in Chains.
Part 6.



Leaving the camp, Haldir kept a close eye on his charge. Just by looking 
at Erestor’s body language he could tell that the other Elf was hurting. 
Galadriel and Celeborn had told him to be very alert and to ensure that 
Erestor wouldn’t escape. They had also told him to return to ‘Lorien as 
quickly as possible, so he pressed his heels into the flanks of his horse, 
urging it to make speed. 

As Rumil was still holding the reins of his horse, Erestor didn’t have a 
choice and was dragged along for the ride. The bouncing movement 
made him sick to his stomach and more blood ran down his thighs. So 
many times he had wished he could heal himself, but his powers never 
worked on himself. He had to endure this torment and hopefully he 
would get the chance to recuperate once they were back in Lothlorien.

Haldir exchanged a look with Orophin. His younger brother had 
disliked Erestor since finding the dark-haired Elf driving the knife into 
Elwing’s personal guard’s chest. In contrast to Orophin, Rumil had 
accepted their duties and tried to be detached and impersonal when 
dealing with Erestor, but things were different with Orophin.

At times, he caught Orophin glaring at Erestor with barely concealed 
hatred in his eyes and he had tried to talk to his brother about this, but 
Orophin had simply shaken his head. He had seen Erestor slay one of 
their own and his mind was set; he would never forgive Erestor. 

The night was still dark and Haldir estimated they could travel several 
more hours before the horses would need to rest. He wanted to return 
Erestor to Lothlorien as quickly as possible, knowing Galadriel wanted 
him confined there. 

Erestor sensed their distrust and it only added to the physical and 
mental pain he was already in. The agony that continued to build in his 
lower body was becoming unbearable and he knew he would 
eventually pass out, but he wanted to hold on as long as possible. Being 
on horseback and unconscious was not a good combination. So he 
gritted his teeth and managed to keep conscious. The pain, however, 
continued to intensify. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hours later, Arien’s first rays touched a Middle-Earth that had 
momentarily been freed of evil. 

By this time, Erestor’s fingernails were deeply buried in the leather of 
the saddle, holding on tightly. Suddenly, the earth beneath them gave 
away and vanished into a gaping hole. Orophin, who was riding in 
front of him, was pitched from his saddle into the crevice that had 
suddenly opened at their feet when his horse planted all four legs and 
lowered its head in order to stop in time. 

Haldir released a shocked cry, seeing his brother disappear beneath the 
earth. Looking over his shoulder, he found that Rumil had stopped 
Erestor’s horse in time and both Elves were now staring at the gaping 
hole in front of them. It was also at that moment that Haldir saw how 
pale his charge was. Pale and shaking like a leaf. That was something 
he had to investigate after reclaiming Orophin. “Rumil, stay here with 
Erestor.”

Rumil, who had wanted to dismount, glared at his oldest brother. He 
wanted to help as well, not be stuck guarding their prisoner!

Erestor wished he could help, but knew they wouldn’t let him – they 
didn’t trust him. So in order to not distract them, he sat quietly, 
relieved that the bouncing motion had momentarily stopped. His lower 
body felt intensely enflamed.

Haldir slid off his horse’s back and cautiously approached the crevice. 
Using strong Elven rope, which he had tied to the saddle, he lowered 
himself into the hole. 

“Do not think you can escape now,” hissed Rumil, “We have orders to 
kill you if necessary.” It wasn’t that he hated Erestor that much as he 
felt the need to threaten him so as to intimidate him to the point that 
he wouldn’t even think of running away. 

Erestor nodded and concentrated on the rescue mission. It was a shame 
that Rumil was stuck guarding him as Haldir would have greatly 
appreciated the help. 

Long and stressful moments passed, but then Haldir reappeared, 
carrying Orophin over his shoulder. The younger Elf was motionless 
and hardly breathing, but his eyes were open and frighteningly lucid. 

Tenderly, Haldir laid Orophin down on the ground, checking for 
injuries. “Orophin? Are you hurt?”

“I… cannot… move…” Panic and fear shone from Orophin’s eyes, as 
he was unable to move. “My neck… I fell onto… my neck.”

Haldir’s breath caught. “Nay…” If his suspicion was correct and 
Orophin had broken his neck, it would take years, maybe even decades, 
for his brother to recover. Even his Elven healing ability couldn’t cure 
such a grave injury in a few days. And then there was the possibility of 
complications. What if the injuries were too severe and the bones 
wouldn’t mend properly?

“Hal… dir?” Orophin began to fight for breath. His lungs, which had 
been working fine a moment ago, now stopped all together. His panic 
increased, realizing he was dying. This was a mortal injury! His eyes 
frantically moved in their sockets, realizing he couldn’t draw in his 
next breath. 

Haldir, panicking as well, grabbed his brother’s hand and tried to 
control his raging emotions. “Nay, we cannot lose you!” 

Rumil, unable to remain on horseback any longer now that his brother 
was dying, let go of the reins of Erestor’s horse, jumped onto the 
ground and hurried over to them. “Aiya, Muindor-nîn, do not leave 
us!” Devastated, he knelt at Orophin’s other side, also cradling a hand.

Orophin’s lips were slowly turning blue and his eyes began to mist 
over. He had never thought he would die like this! He would have 
accepted dying in battle, but not because of an earth slide!  

Lost in their pain and grief, neither Haldir nor Rumil noticed that 
Erestor had managed to dismount. Gathering his cloak around him, he 
bit down the pain that swept through him with every step that he took. 
He was a healer and it was in his nature to help where he could, even 
when the wounded was one of his jailors. 

Haldir suddenly registered a third pair of hands on Orophin’s body and 
wanted to glare at Erestor, who was disturbing Orophin’s last moments 
with his two brothers. But then he held his tongue, seeing the 
anguished expression in those dark eyes. 

Rumil also wanted to sweep away Erestor’s hands, which the raven-
haired Elf had rested on Orophin’s throat, but something kept him 
back.

Orophin was still alert, although a terrible coldness was trying to eat 
him from the inside out and his eyes widened, feeling Erestor’s warm 
hands on him. His brothers’ hands didn’t feel that warm!

Centering himself, Erestor called on his own life energy – the little he 
had left after pulling Elrond from the brink – and let his remaining 
energy flow into Orophin’s body, hoping it was enough to heal the 
injury. 

For long moments, Haldir and Rumil stared at Erestor in disbelief. 
Then they looked down and found that a warm glow surrounded 
Erestor’s hands. That glow disappeared into their brother’s chest and 
they both sucked in their breath, feeling Orophin’s fingers twitch. 

“Muindor?” Haldir’s eyes widened, afraid to believe what he was 
seeing. Orophin was moving about, squirming beneath Erestor’s hands. 
His brother’s breathing was normal again and Orophin was even trying 
to sit up. 

But that attempt was sabotaged when Erestor collapsed on top of 
Orophin. The raven-haired Elf’s body had gone completely limp.

“What happened?” Rumil was also afraid to believe Orophin had been 
healed, but then again, Erestor was a healer. Why would their prisoner 
heal one of his enemies? “Haldir? What do we do?”

“Get him… off… cannot… breath.” Orophin, stunned by Erestor’s 
action, stared at the dark-haired Elf who now moaned miserably. 

Haldir was the first to act. With extreme caution, he gathered Erestor – 
his brother’s savior – in his arms. After what Erestor had done for 
them, the raven-haired Elf deserved some respect. 

“Orophin? How do you fare, Muindor?” Rumil assisted Orophin when 
his older brother sat upright. Three pair of eyes now stared at Erestor. 

“He healed me. Why?” Orophin shook his head in disbelief. “Why? He 
knows I loathe him.”

“He is a healer,” offered Haldir after pondering Orophin’s question. “He 
could not turn his back on you.”

“A healer,” mumbled Rumil thoughtfully. “I still wonder how a healer 
was capable of taking a life.”

“Aye, I saw him driving that knife into the guard’s chest,” said 
Orophin, confused. But he couldn’t deny that Erestor had saved his life. 

“We can ponder this later. First, we need to take care of our healer.” 
Haldir lifted an unconscious Erestor in his arms and carried him toward 
his horse. After placing Erestor back in his saddle, he steadied the Elf 
with a hand, supporting his back. “Rumil, help Orophin onto his horse 
and make sure he does not go anywhere near that hole!” 

Orophin felt disorientated and unsteady when he walked toward his 
horse but the frightening numbness no longer terrorized his body. 
Once he was safely back in his saddle, his gaze sought out Erestor again. 
/Why?/ 

Erestor slumped forward and his upper body now rested against his 
horse’s neck. 

Haldir, worried for both Erestor and his recovering brother, decided to 
search for a location where they could set up camp. All of them needed 
to rest. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Long moments later, Rumil pointed out a suitable spot and Haldir 
agreed. His gaze came to rest on Orophin. His brother was awfully 
quiet, but seemed to have recovered from his fall. “Are you still in any 
pain?”

Orophin shook his head. “I am rather tired, but there is absolutely no 
pain.” But memories of being unable to move and breathe still 
tormented him. Erestor had changed that. Erestor had given him life 
again when he had been ready to release his last breath. How was he to 
react to that? How to act when Erestor regained consciousness? The 
hatred which he had formerly felt toward the raven-haired Elf was 
quickly vanishing.

Haldir dismounted first and went over to Orophin, just in case his 
brother needed support while dismounting. But Orophin gracefully slid 
off of the horse’s back and began to gather firewood. Now that Sauron 
had been defeated, the area was relatively safe and they could risk 
building a fire. He distanced himself, needing a moment to deal with 
his near death experience.

Rumil dismounted as well and helped Haldir to get Erestor onto the 
ground. He gasped in shock, seeing the fresh blood clinging to the 
saddle. “He is injured, Haldir.” 

Catching sight of the blood, Haldir’s features contorted. “Then I should 
examine him. I still find it odd that he cannot heal himself. Hand him 
to me.” Rumil placed Erestor in his arms and Haldir carried his charge 
nearer the fire that Orophin was preparing to build. 

“Rumil? Do you still keep that blanket in your saddlebag? And 
Orophin, can you arrange for some fresh water? See if a stream is 
nearby.” Orophin would welcome the chance to get some moments 
alone. His brother left at once after nodding his head.

Rumil had removed the blanket from his saddlebag and now spread it 
out over the cold, somewhat damp earth. Haldir then placed their 
unconscious charge on it, lying Erestor down. 

“It is best to do this now whilst he is still unconscious.” Haldir was 
amazed at the protectiveness he suddenly felt toward Erestor. /He 
saved Orophin’s life. I am indebted to him. And I want to know why he 
did that./

Slowly, the two brothers pushed Erestor’s heavy cloak out of the way 
and turned him around. Both gasped, seeing the bloodstains on 
Erestor’s robes. Their gazes met above Erestor’s body, both thinking the 
exact same thing.

Erestor had been sent to rescue Elrond, and from what they had 
gathered, Galadriel had instructed Erestor to bond with the half-Elf. 
Making love strengthened a new bond and apparently Erestor had been 
on the receiving end. 

“Riding must have been pure torment,” whispered Rumil softly. “And 
he never said a word.”

Haldir wondered why. “Maybe he thought we would not take the 
bleeding seriously.” They hadn’t been very kind to the raven-haired 
Elf. 

“I found water.” Orophin, also realizing the nature of Erestor’s injury, 
paled. With stern determination, he placed the water skins next to 
Haldir and then sat down to build the fire, adding wood. He remained 
quiet, having lots to think about. Erestor’s deed had upended his life. 

“Do we have some spare leggings with us?” Haldir looked at Rumil, 
knowing his youngest brother at times packed odd things into his 
saddlebags. 

“Nay, but I wish I had.” Rumil sighed distressed. “Maybe I can help by 
gathering healing herbs?”

Haldir nodded his approval. “But do not stray too far from the camp.” 
He was staring at his charge, feeling strangely helpless. There was so 
little he could do to help Erestor. 

“I can heat some water for a healing tea,” said Orophin unexpectedly. 

“I am sure he would appreciate that,” said Haldir, “But he is bleeding 
severely. He will have to apply it internally.” 

Rumil got to his feet and disappeared between the trees, hoping he 
would easily and quickly find the plantain leaves, sage, and yarrow that 
he needed. 

“I still do not understand,” whispered Orophin, using the small kettle 
they always took with them on their journeys. At times, even Elves 
needed to eat. 

“Maybe we should ask him when he wakes up again.” Realizing there 
was little he could do to help, Haldir unclasped his cloak and placed it 
over Erestor’s body, which was now beginning to tremble. “We should 
have been more alert.” 

Orophin’s usually melodic voice sounded harsh, replying to Haldir’s 
remark. “We are only checking on him now because he saved my life. 
If that earth slide had not happened, we still would not know he is 
hurting.”

Haldir bowed his head in shame. “You are right.” It had been easy 
during all these millennia to merely think of Erestor as a kinslayer. 
They had never bothered to look any closer. 

Orophin stared entranced at the water, almost willing it to come to the 
boil. “We should have brought more supplies. The only thing we have 
is Lembas and water.”

“We did not know we would end up with a wounded Elf on our 
hands.”

“Haldir, I was dying when he reached for me. His warmth enfolded me, 
kept my fëa from traveling to the Great Halls. How can I ever repay 
him for saving my life?” Orophin looked at Haldir pleadingly. “How 
can I reconcile that with the fact that he took a life in the past?”

“I do not know,” said Haldir tiredly. He had guarded Erestor for many 
centuries, but had never been interested in the healer. He had carried 
out his duties and when he had been relieved he had never given 
Erestor a second thought. He had been convinced the raven-haired Elf 
deserved his punishment. But now he wasn’t that sure anymore, after 
witnessing Erestor healing his brother. 

Absentmindedly, his hand had found its way onto Erestor’s brow and 
his fingertips were trying to smooth away the deep lines that had 
formed there. He had never tried to get to know the other Elf and 
maybe it was time to change that now. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rumil soundlessly approached the camp and, once he had reached 
Orophin, handed his brother half of the healing herbs he had gathered 
to make tea with. The other half he handed to Haldir, who knew of 
other ways to use these herbs. Looking at Erestor, he found that the 
injured Elf was still asleep. “He did more than healing Elrond Half-
Elven, didn’t he?”

Haldir nodded. “He bonded with the Peredhel and confirmed their 
connection by submitting to him. The half-Elf could have been a bit 
more… considerate.” Realizing his protective feelings toward Erestor 
were growing stronger, he wondered what that meant when looking 
toward the future. 

Taking hold of the herbs Rumil handed him, he put them in his mouth 
and began to chew until the leaves had turned into to a smooth paste. 
Once it had reached the right consistency, he put it in the leaves that 
had formerly held the waybread, which he now handed to his brothers. 
“Eat, we will need our strength.” This journey seemed ill fated.

“His tea is ready,” announced Orophin. “See if you can wake him up.”

Haldir wasn’t sure it was the right thing to do, but complied, knowing 
Erestor’s body needed the plants’ healing qualities. “Erestor? Wake up.” 
He slowly shook the healer’s shoulder, hoping Erestor wouldn’t startle 
himself awake as he had seen happen in the past.

This time Erestor’s eyes only slowly regained awareness and he was 
thoroughly confused, seeing Haldir’s concerned gaze directed at him. 
Then he began to remember everything; arriving in Elrond’s tent, the 
pain that had followed and giving life back to Orophin. The least Haldir 
could do for him was to let him sleep. Why wake him? Whilst asleep, 
his body had felt numb, but now the pain had doubled in strength. 
“Please… Can’t I continue to sleep?”

“Not yet,” replied Haldir, who was suddenly growing aware of the 
pleading, and somewhat childish tone. “We made you some tea.”

“Tea?” What kind of odd dream was this? The three brothers had never 
been interested in taking care of him before. /I saved Orophin. They 
are probably doing this because they feel indebted to me./ 

Orophin had filled a cup with the healing tea and now walked over to 
where Erestor was resting. “This would be easier with you sitting up.”

Sitting up? Erestor cringed; he still felt like he was being burned from 
the inside and sitting up was not a good idea. “I do not need the tea. 
Thank you for making it, but—“

“We will help you,” said Haldir in a remarkably gentle tone. “You can 
lean against me.”

Erestor suddenly realized they knew and immediately lowered his eyes, 
falling back into behavior he had learned during his childhood when 
he had been afraid to look at Feanor. /They know! They know, know, 
know./ Panicking, he wondered why they were taking care of him 
when it would be much easier to make fun of him. 

He flinched violently, feeling Haldir and Rumil’s hands on him. Both 
Elves were gently pulling him upright and just when the pain 
threatened to overwhelm him, Rumil eased him back against Haldir. 
He suddenly found himself cradled against the sentry’s muscular chest. 
Feeling lost, he let them take charge. He was in no condition to oppose 
them. 

The fragrances of several healing plants drifted into his nostrils and he 
easily identified them as herbs meant to stop bleeding and infection. By 
the Valar, he felt so embarrassed now that they knew Elrond had made 
him bleed. They probably thought him a whore as well as a murderer!

“Sip, Erestor,” commanded Haldir in a gentle tone. Erestor’s behavior 
worried him and he realized that, if he had paid attention before, it 
would have worried him back then as well. But he had ignored it. 

Erestor automatically obeyed; another instinct that had been ingrained 
in him by Feanor and Celegorm. Raising his eyes, he probed Orophin’s, 
trying to assess if the Elf had made a complete recovery. Although the 
blue eyes seemed somewhat dull, he could tell the Elf hadn’t sustained 
any permanent damage. His healing power had just been strong enough 
to pull Orophin back. /It is no wonder that I feel like this. I pulled two 
Elves back from the Halls of Mandos./

Haldir cleared his throat, uncertain how to address this. “We noticed 
that you are bleeding – internally.” Erestor’s blush now faded and a 
ghostly pallor appeared instead. “We think we know what you did. You 
bonded with Elrond Half-Elven.”

Violent tremors coursed through his body, realizing that if he hadn’t 
been bound to Elrond already, he might have ended up being bonded 
to Orophin instead. It surprised him that he had been able to pull the 
sentry back without forming a bond. 

Taking Erestor’s silence as an affirmative, Haldir continued. “Rumil 
gathered healing herbs. We put part of them in your tea and I made a 
paste with the other half. You are a healer. I assume you know how to 
use this paste?” He cringed, feeling Erestor trying to pull away from 
him. “Do not worry. None of us will apply that paste. That is something 
you need to do yourself.”

Erestor was relieved that he was spared this final humiliation. “I will 
also heal without it.”

“But it will take you much longer to heal and you will continue to be in 
pain, especially once we continue our journey,” said Orophin calmly. 
His changed feelings puzzled him, but he accepted them nonetheless. 
When he had felt Erestor’s warm, healing touch, he had instinctively 
known that the dark-haired Elf was incapable of inflicting pain, or 
taking someone’s life. He just didn’t know how to combine that new 
knowledge with the scene he had witnessed such a long time ago. 
Erestor had killed that guard!

“Maybe some privacy would convince you to apply the paste?” 
suggested Rumil. He had put himself in Erestor’s place, trying to 
understand the other Elf’s fears. “We can leave you alone for some 
minutes. No one will be watching you.”

Erestor stared at Rumil in surprise. Were they actually trying to be 
kind to him, or was this just a new trick to hurt his feelings? He was 
afraid to trust them. 

“I can tell you are hurting,” said Haldir, whispering softly into Erestor’s 
ear. “You saved my brother’s life and did not run when you had the 
chance. Instead, you healed Orophin. We trust you not to run away 
now either.”

/Like I am in any state to run away!/ thought Erestor dejectedly. /I 
cannot even walk unaided./ He tried to pull away, seeing Haldir reach 
for him. It was an old reflex, which he had adopted when Feanor had 
begun beating him. 

Haldir’s eyes widened and his hand froze in mid-air, seeing and 
correctly interpreting Erestor’s reaction. “I am not going to hit you.” 
What else had he missed when he should have been paying attention?

“You should accept the offer,” said Rumil, rising from the earth. 
Inclining his head, he hoped his brothers understood and would follow 
him away from the camp.

Haldir placed the leaves, holding the paste in Erestor’s shaky hand and 
then eased his charge onto his side, so he could rest without being in 
too much pain. “We will return in a few moments. We will call out to 
you first to make certain you have finished.”

Trembling over his entire body, Erestor watched the three brothers 
move away from the camp. He still didn’t know if he could trust them 
to keep their word. What if they were playing with him and would 
burst out laughing when he was pushing the paste inside his abused 
passage? Could he take the risk of further humiliation?

Haldir exchanged a saddened look with his brothers once they were 
out of Erestor’s sight. They had no plans to peek, wanting Erestor to 
have his privacy. “What do you think? Will he use the paste?”

“I do not know, Muindor,” said Rumil, feeling miserable. He kicked a 
small pebble over the ground, feeling annoyed with himself, a feeling 
he shared with his brothers. “We will give him some minutes and then 
we will check on him.”

Haldir nodded once. “We will have to make sure he takes care of 
himself.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back at the camp, Erestor was straining his hearing. As far as he could 
tell, the brothers had kept their word and were giving him his privacy. 
Staring at the bundle that held the paste, he knew he should use it. 
Applying the paste would help him heal and keep the pain to a 
minimum. Sighing, he made his decision.

After prying open the bundle, he gathered some paste onto a fingertip 
and reached behind him. His breathing was ragged and his senses 
remained trained on the three brothers, determined to pick up on them 
should they return unexpectedly. 

The moment he pushed the paste into the injured channel, its healing 
qualities began to unfold, cooling and numbing the area. Quickly, he 
repeated the treatment until he had coated the most severely torn 
section. Sighing blissfully at the absence of pain, he pulled his robes 
back in place. Suddenly he grew aware of the fact that it was Haldir’s 
cloak that was keeping him warm. What had he done to deserve such 
kindness? Ah, they felt indebted because of Orophin. This had nothing 
to do with wanting to take care of him. They were just repaying a debt.

Feeling depressed and alone, Erestor pulled Haldir’s warm cloak closer 
to his body. He had better enjoy this whilst it lasted.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Erestor? Have you finished?” Haldir called out softly, and when he 
didn’t get an answer, he walked toward the camp. From this distance, 
he had a clear view of Erestor, who had fallen asleep again. Signaling 
for his brothers to follow, they came to a halt in front of their sleeping 
charge. 

All three of them felt relieved, finding that Erestor had used the 
healing paste. 

“We will spend some more hours here,” decided Haldir. “Rumil, you 
take first watch and I will take second. Orophin? Rest, you just 
returned from the dead.”

Orophin snorted at Haldir, but did it softly, not wanting to wake 
Erestor, whose face was finally relaxed in sleep now that his pain had 
lessened. He privately vowed that things would change from now on.

TBC

Muindor = brother
Fëa = soul 

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine. 

Heart in Chains.
Part 7


“We should leave now.” Haldir had let Erestor sleep until dusk and was 
now growing impatient. Galadriel and Celeborn expected them to 
return as quickly as possible and they were already late. “Prepare the 
horses for departure whilst I wake Erestor.” Haldir sat on his heels 
beside the sleeping Elf and pushed some wayward locks away from 
Erestor’s face. The blue paint was losing its radiance and left a ghostly 
impression on the other’s face. He regretted having to wake Erestor, 
but it would be best to depart now. 

“Erestor? Wake up.” He gently shook Erestor’s shoulder and caught the 
terror in the brown eyes upon awakening. “We are about to leave.” If it 
were up to him, he would prefer to check to see if the bleeding had 
stopped, but he knew instinctively that Erestor wouldn’t allow it. “Can 
you get to your feet?”

Erestor groaned softly, expecting to be hit by a sickening burning 
sensation when he sat up, but the pain was absent. There was some 
minor discomfort, but he could deal with that. Recalling Orophin’s 
accident, his eyes sought out the silver-haired Elf’s form. “How does he 
fare?”

Haldir understood at once. “Orophin slept peacefully for some hours 
and seems completely recovered. I want you to know that you have my 
eternal gratitude for saving his life.”

Erestor nodded absentmindedly. Centering himself, he frowned. His 
life energy was flowing away from him, into someone else’s mind and 
suddenly he understood; his life energy was sustaining Elrond, 
strengthening the half-Elf. He sighed dejectedly, knowing he would 
never feel whole again now that a part of him was missing. The only 
way to ever reclaim that feeling of oneness would be to live with 
Elrond as his bonded mate, but that day would never come. From now 
on, he had to get used to feeling weak and incomplete. 

“Erestor? Do you need assistance?” Haldir grew worried, not receiving 
an answer. 

Erestor shook himself from his musings. “I can manage on my own.” It 
was seldom that someone had offered him assistance and he wasn’t sure 
how to deal with that offer now. He slowly pushed himself onto his 
feet, suddenly growing aware of the supportive arm wrapped around 
his waist. Hadn’t he told Haldir he didn’t need the help?

“You are still weak,” remarked Haldir softly. “Let me help.”

His first instinct was to shake off the supportive arm, but Erestor didn’t 
have the strength to spare and allowed himself to be led to his horse. 
Aiya, he was not looking forward to having to ride on horseback again! 

“Rumil? Help me!” Haldir called for assistance.

Erestor blushed fiercely when the two brothers carefully placed him on 
the horse’s back. His face contorted, because the ache in his lower body 
was returning. Gritting his teeth, he tried not to show his discomfort, 
which would grow even worse once they sped up. 

“We will ride slowly,” said Haldir, mounting as well. 

Tightly clutching the saddle for support, Erestor put up the hood and 
bowed his head. The fact that they were helping him only added to his 
embarrassment. Only Maglor and Elwing had ever helped him before. 
He just didn’t know how to react to them. 

Orophin steered his horse closer to Erestor’s. “I wanted to thank you 
for what you did. You kept my fëa here on Arda. I am not yet ready to 
leave my brothers behind.”

Embarrassed, Erestor nodded, but remained quiet. What was he 
supposed to say? 

Getting frustrated with Erestor’s shy behavior, Orophin asked, “And 
how do you fare today?”

Erestor tensed. Why was Orophin asking him these questions? “Fine.” 
But it was a lie. He was still hurting inside, though the pain no longer 
compared to the agony he had been in yesterday. 

Orophin didn’t buy it, but didn’t call Erestor on it. Instead, he 
exchanged a questioning look with Haldir. How to proceed from here? 
“We still have some Lembas left and you have not eaten yet.” He 
uncovered a piece of the bread and offered it to Erestor. Next, he 
presented a full water skin to the dark-haired Elf. He felt hurt, seeing 
the distrust in Erestor’s eyes. “Take it. You need to keep up your 
strength.”

Erestor gingerly took hold of the Lembas and took a few bites. Then he 
washed everything down with a few mouthfuls of water, careful not to 
drink too much. Handing the water skin back to Orophin, he wondered 
about the displeased look in the sentry’s eyes. What had he done now?

“You can drink more if you want. We have ample supplies of water.” 
Orophin wished he could offer Erestor something more substantial. 
Maybe they could go hunting the next time they rested. Knowing 
Haldir, they would rest again shortly now that Erestor was growing 
tired again. 

Rumil, who was riding on Erestor’s other side, considered everything 
he had just seen and heard. He was overcome by the need to get to 
know Erestor better. “You bonded with Elrond half-Elven…” he said in 
a thoughtful tone, “And yet the Lord and Lady want you to return to 
‘Lorien? Would it not be best for you to remain near your bonded 
mate?”

Erestor was severely startled by that question. Why was Rumil asking 
him this? He remained silent, not wanting to explain. 

“Erestor? Rumil made a valid point,” said Haldir, who now joined them 
as well. “Why leave?”

Realizing there was no way out, Erestor nervously cleared his throat. “I 
am only following your Lady’s orders.”

“Which are?” Haldir wondered about Galadriel’s motives. 

Erestor fidgeted with the end of a sleeve, not wanting to explain 
further, but also realizing they wouldn’t leave him alone until their 
curiosity had been satisfied. “Elrond Half-Elven still has to play some 
role on Arda and the Lady Galadriel urged me to save him. I complied, 
of course.”

“Of course,” repeated Haldir thoughtfully. /She probably didn’t give 
you much of a choice to begin with./  

Erestor bit his bottom lip, wishing they would leave him be.

“But I take it you would have preferred to get to know your new mate 
instead of having to rush back to ‘Lorien.” Haldir’s eyes narrowed, 
something was wrong with this.

Erestor sighed. “He is not my mate, Haldir. I bonded with him in order 
to save his life. This is no marriage.”

The three brothers exchanged worried looks. It was Haldir who 
eventually voiced their thoughts. “A bond was created for life. You are 
married to him. The two of you are life mates.”

Exasperated, Erestor pushed back his hood and glared at Haldir. “You 
do not understand. I am bound to him, but Elrond Half-Elven is not 
bound to me. He does not even know someone brought him back from 
the brink. As far as he is concerned, I do not exist. He thought he was 
making love to Gil-galad, not me!” Exhausted – and embarrassed for 
losing his temper – Erestor averted his eyes. 

Haldir couldn’t conceal his shock and disapproval. What had Galadriel 
and Celeborn been thinking when ordering this? They had condemned 
Erestor to a half-life, constantly feeding and sensing his mate whilst 
Elrond remained blissfully unaware of the fact that someone was 
suffering in his place. 

Orophin growled softly, displeased. “I cannot understand why you 
agreed to such a bargain.”

Releasing a deep sigh, Erestor tried to explain, “I have been confined to 
my room for three millennia. Long and lonely years with nothing to 
occupy my mind. I was cut off from life, and never allowed to venture 
outside.”

Haldir nodded; he and his brothers had guarded Erestor for most of 
those years and yet they had never given it a second thought, 
convinced as they were that the Elf deserved that punishment. “So 
what did they offer you?” He knew very well that Galadriel and 
Celeborn would never set Erestor free. They would merely throw him 
breadcrumbs.

Orophin was taken aback, seeing the sudden sparkle in Erestor’s dark 
eyes. 

“I will be allowed to go outside once a week and to read the books in 
the Lord’s library.” Erestor smiled happily at that prospect. After years 
of frustration, boredom and loneliness he would be allowed some 
distraction.

Rumil snorted loudly. “And that is why you let them destroy your life?”

Frozen in shock, Erestor quickly stared at his hands. “You do not 
understand. My life was ruined the day I met Feanor.” His eyes 
widened, realizing what he had just said. 

“Feanor?” Now Haldir’s curiosity was piqued.

“I do not want to speak about him.” Remembering his childhood 
brought back too much suffering. Erestor uneasily shifted in the saddle, 
wondering if they were going to travel to ‘Lorien nonstop. In spite of 
the pain, he relished being out in the open after so many millennia of 
confinement. 

Haldir was realizing the same thing. He had never asked himself just 
how Erestor dealt with the constant confinement and now that they 
were in the woods, the dark-haired Elf seemed more at peace. “Rumil? 
Scout ahead and find us a place to make camp. Orophin, would you go 
hunting?” Orophin didn’t appear to be affected by his near death 
experience, but Haldir remained cautious. 

“I will bring back some game,” promised Orophin, also feeling the need 
to eat more than just Lembas. After exchanging a glance with Rumil, 
both Elves left, leaving Haldir alone with Erestor.

The sudden departure worried Erestor, who now found himself alone 
with Haldir. It felt more like he was at Haldir’s mercy now that the 
other two Elves had gone. /And why did they leave in the first place?/ 
The three brothers had been told by Galadriel to watch him constantly.

Making sure their trot was slow and not causing Erestor any 
discomfort, Haldir wondered what subject was safe to bring up in 
conversation. “Would you enjoy watching the sunset tonight?” 
Although Erestor’s room had a window, it faced north and it had 
probably been millennia since the raven-haired Elf had last seen the 
sun set or rise. 

“I would like that,” whispered Erestor gingerly, still feeling distrustful 
now that Haldir was acting this kindly. 

The silence returned, making Haldir nervous. “Did the paste work? Did 
it lessen your discomfort?” Glancing at Erestor, he easily caught the 
other’s blush. 

“Thank you for gathering those herbs and making that paste. It helped, 
aye.” Erestor felt at a loss and before he knew it, words he hadn’t 
wanted to say left his lips. “Why are you being this kind to me? You 
were not before.”

Haldir felt ashamed of his past behavior. “Seeing you heal Orophin 
opened my eyes.”

That wasn’t the answer Erestor had expected. “Opened your eyes?”

“You are a healer. I do not know why you killed that guard, but—“ 

“I never did!” Erestor exploded with emotion. For millennia he had 
tried to convince them that he hadn’t taken part in the kinslayings; that 
he had merely tried to help! /I was keeping that knife in place! Rhoss 
had already lost too much blood and removing it would have 
quickened his death!/ His fingers had been curled around the hilt, 
trying to lessen the blood loss. That had been the exact moment 
Orophin had entered, calling him a murderer. He had tried to explain, 
but no one had ever listened. In the end, he had stopped trying. 

“I wish I could believe you,” whispered Haldir, “but Orophin saw you 
commit murder.”

/Orophin saw me keeping the knife in place to slow down the blood 
loss./ But he didn’t bother to protest any more. No one ever listened. 

Haldir felt saddened, uncertain what to think of Erestor. The dark-
haired Elf had been imprisoned for millennia and maybe it was time to 
give him a bit more freedom. Were Galadriel and Celeborn planning to 
keep Erestor locked up forever? 

“I found a great spot!” Rumil appeared to their right, a big smile on his 
face. “And I encountered some Men. I managed to trade part of our 
Lembas for clean leggings.” A triumphant expression appeared on his 
face. “Then you won’t have to wear those bloodstained robes any 
longer.”

Erestor’s face colored red, being reminded of his injury. Uncertain what 
to say, he just remained silent.

Rumil, who had expected a bit more enthusiasm on Erestor’s part, gave 
Haldir a questioning look. 

Haldir nodded once. He would ensure Erestor changed into those 
leggings. After Rumil had handed the garment to him, Haldir followed 
his brother to the campsite.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Half an hour later, Haldir had built a fire and was roasting the rabbits 
Orophin had managed to catch. Orophin had been slightly 
disappointed that he hadn’t found any more game, but the rabbits 
would do. 

“Here, change into these.” Haldir offered Erestor the leggings. 

Erestor didn’t feel comfortable meeting Haldir’s eyes, but forced 
himself to accept the leggings. 

“You can change behind those bushes,” said Haldir, instinctively 
knowing Erestor would never change with them present. 

“You are letting me out of your sight?” Erestor felt confused. Haldir’s 
behavior puzzled him, as did Rumil’s and Orophin’s. 

“I trust you not to run away,” Haldir replied calmly. “Now go change 
and then join us for dinner.” He watched closely as Erestor disappeared 
behind the bushes. 

“Muindor?” Rumil placed a hand on Haldir’s shoulder. “What is on 
your mind?”

“I have the feeling we wronged him.”

“He has slain one of our own kin, Haldir, you can never forget that.” 
Rumil felt conflicted as well. “But that does not mean we cannot take 
care of him.”

Haldir nodded and then followed Rumil to the fire, where Orophin was 
dividing the food into four portions. He smiled, seeing that one portion 
was bigger than the others. 

Erestor hesitantly approached the three brothers. He did feel better 
now that he had changed into the clean leggings. Uncertain if he was 
supposed to sit down or to remove himself from the situation, he 
looked toward Haldir for instructions.

“Sit down and eat.” Haldir gestured for Erestor to sit down beside him. 

Erestor gingerly complied, sitting cross-legged. When he had changed 
into the leggings he had checked on himself. He had been extremely 
relieved to find that the bleeding had stopped. However, he still felt 
sore. Haldir then handed him a bowl filled with meat and Lembas, 
which increased his unease, realizing his bowl was the fullest. The 
three brothers had taken less. 

Rumil, seeing Erestor’s nervousness, met questioning brown eyes. “Eat. 
You are much too skinny.”

Slowly, Erestor chewed on the roasted meat. He had always been too 
skinny, thanks to Feanor, Curufin and Celegorm. They had been the 
reason he had seldom eaten meals regularly. “Thank you for the food.” 
He was hungrier than he wanted them to know, and before he realized 
it, he was wolfing down the food. 

The three brothers exchanged worried looks. One by one, they placed 
pieces of Lembas and roasted rabbit into Erestor’s bowl, encouraging 
him to continue to eat.

But Erestor wildly shook his head. “Nay, I cannot eat your food!” 

Rumil covered his bowl with his hand when Erestor tried to put the 
food back into it. “Nay, you need it more than we do. We did not pull 
two Elves back from the brink.”

Looking at Orophin and Haldir, Erestor found them nodding their 
approval. They wouldn’t let him return the food to them. Eating more 
slowly, he devoured the rest as well. 

Haldir, feeling strangely at peace, smiled and pointed out the setting 
sun at the horizon. “Arien is most radiant tonight.”

Unexpectedly, Erestor dropped his now empty bowl onto the ground, 
lost in admiration of the golden rays. “Aye, beautiful.” Now that his 
belly was full and the pain had receded, he could fully appreciate 
Arien’s warmth. 

The rare smile that now graced Erestor’s features made Haldir nod his 
head. “Beautiful indeed.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The closer they got to ‘Lorien, the more withdrawn Erestor became. 
Rumil, who stayed close to Erestor at all times, tried to engage the 
raven-haired Elf in a conversation, but Erestor barely reacted. In the 
end, he turned to Haldir. “What is wrong with him?”

Haldir had asked himself the same question, but unlike Rumil, he had 
also reached a conclusion. “He is bound to Elrond Half-Elven. His life-
energy flows to the Peredhel, leaving him perpetually weak. It will 
probably be like that for the rest of his life.”

“Living like that for all eternity would be… unthinkable,” whispered 
Rumil in shock.

“We must be careful,” said Haldir, addressing his brothers. “Should our 
Lady and Lord suspect that we have come to care for our charge, they 
will appoint new guards and we do not want that, do we?”

Rumil sighed deeply. “We are hugely indebted to him.”

Orophin, who had overheard their conversation, nodded as well. If 
necessary they would act indifferently toward Erestor whenever 
Galadriel and Celeborn were close.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Galadriel and Celeborn had seated themselves and were now waiting 
for Haldir to deliver his report. They already knew that Erestor had 
bonded himself to Elrond, because tidings of the Peredhel’s miraculous 
recovery had reached them. 

Haldir felt slightly nervous, now that he couldn’t be completely honest 
with his Lord and Lady, but he would do his best. 

“Haldir, tell us why you arrived so late. We expected you to return 
yesterday.” Galadriel studied her most trusted guardian and sensed that 
something had changed, but she couldn’t label the sensation. 

“As you ordered, we took Erestor to the camp at Mount Doom. We 
handed Glorfindel the scroll and Erestor was allowed to attend to 
Elrond Half-Elven.”

“And Erestor bonded with the Peredhel.” Celeborn nodded once. 

“Aye.” Haldir considered what to tell and what to keep back. “When 
we left, Erestor appeared drained and I called for a rest.”

Galadriel raised one eyebrow delicately. “Rest?”

“My Lady, I know you ordered us to return at once, but he was injured 
and needed the rest.”

“Injured?” Now Celeborn studied Haldir closely as well. What was their 
guardian not telling them?

Haldir cleared his throat, uncomfortable with addressing this matter. 
“The Peredhel… claimed… Erestor. He was bleeding internally. Elrond 
Half-Elven had not been gentle and I thought it wise to let Erestor rest. 
Most certainly when one considers that it is his life-energy that 
sustains the Peredhel.” 

“You were right then,” said Galadriel eventually. “Erestor must stay 
alive and strong enough to support Elrond.” 

“Did anything else out of the ordinary happen?” Celeborn eyed his 
sentry. Like Galadriel, he wondered what Haldir was hiding from 
them. 

Seeing their knowing expressions, Haldir caved in. “Orophin took a fall 
and broke his neck.”

Galadriel released a startled yelp. “But I saw him ride at your side when 
you arrived!”

Haldir coughed nervously. “Erestor used his healing skills to heal him.”

At that, Galadriel and Celeborn exchanged a surprised look. “I always 
wondered about Erestor,” said Celeborn eventually. “We are indebted 
to him, then.”

“Not you, my Lord,” said Haldir carefully. “Rumil, Orophin and I are.”

“And this will not affect your ability to guard him?” Galadriel 
considered replacing them with other sentries, who would treat Erestor 
as a prisoner, instead of their ‘charge’. But then again, Erestor had saved 
Orophin’s life. Taking this duty away from the three brothers would be 
dishonorable.  

Celeborn felt the same way. “Now that Erestor has kept his word, he 
has earned certain privileges. Once a week one of you will accompany 
him outside, but he is never to be left alone. He will also be allowed 
access to the library.” Celeborn frowned, seeing the disapproval in 
Haldir’s eyes. “Mellon, Erestor has been confined to his room for over 
three thousands years. Surely you do not begrudge him a weekly walk 
and reading some books?”

Haldir forced himself to remain calm. Celeborn had misinterpreted his 
look, and he wasn’t inclined to correct the other Elf. Let them think he 
wanted Erestor incarcerated. It would give him more leeway when he 
took the dark-haired Elf outside. “I trust you to know best.”

“Good. You may leave now. Rumil has taken first guard and you will 
relieve him tomorrow.” Galadriel inclined her head and watched 
Haldir leave. Once the sentry could no longer hear them, she said, 
“Something else happened. He is keeping things from us.”

Celeborn nodded, agreeing with her. “But I am pleased that Erestor 
carried out his part of the bargain.”

“Aye, and it is an eternal pity that he took part in the kinslayings. He is 
a talented healer.” Galadriel sighed and rested her head on her 
husband’s shoulder. 

“We must keep an eye on Erestor,” said Celeborn thoughtfully. “I have 
the feeling he also has a very important part to play in Arda’s history.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor had frozen, now that he stood in his room again. These four 
walls had been a prison for a long time, but now they almost felt like 
home after his ordeal with Elrond Half-Elven. He headed into the 
bathroom, but didn’t bother to fill up the bathtub. Instead, he removed 
his clothes and quickly cleaned himself up. Once he felt relatively 
clean, he picked up a sleeping robe and curled up on his bed. 

He made the mistake of remembering the treatment he had suffered at 
Elrond’s hands and tears reappeared in his eyes. He doubted he would 
ever forget the pain and humiliation he had endured that night. The 
worst thing was that he could still sense Elrond, the half-Elf’s weakness 
and constant need for his life-energy. Unable to break the bond, he 
gave in and let his energy flow down the bond. 

“Erestor?”

His eyes opened, and he was startled to find Rumil in the doorway. 
“What do you want?” Couldn’t they give him some time to lick his 
wounds in private?

“I brought you something to eat.” Rumil placed the tray next to Erestor 
on the bed. “I reckon you are still hungry.”

He was, but Erestor refused to admit to it. “Thank you,” he whispered 
softly. The freshly baked bread, honey, meats and fruits did look 
extremely tempting. He blinked in surprise, finding Rumil had also 
added a carafe of wine. “Thank you,” he repeated again, uncertain why 
Rumil was still this generous and kind. Orophin was fine and now that 
they were off the road, he had expected his guardians to return to their 
normal, distant behavior. 

Rumil cleared his throat and Erestor finally looked up, realizing the 
silver-haired Elf was hiding something behind his back. 

“I thought you would want something to read. Lord Celeborn gave me 
permission to select some books for you.” Rumil placed three books on 
the nightstand. 

Not trusting his voice any longer, Erestor nodded his head. Gingerly, 
he ate a slice of bread with honey and then indulged himself by eating 
some meat as well. He expected Rumil to take what was left over back 
to the kitchens, but the tray stayed on his bed. 

“Are you still tired?” Rumil pulled up a chair and seated himself next to 
the bed, noticing the distressed expression in Erestor’s eyes. The healer 
still didn’t trust him and he realized it could take centuries for Erestor 
to come to trust him. 

“Aye, I am tired.” But as long as Rumil continued to look at him like 
that, he couldn’t possibly rest.

Fortunately, Rumil realized that. He rose from his chair, walked over to 
the window and opened it to let some fresh air into the room. “I will 
check on you later. Is there anything you need?”

/Aye, my freedom back./ But Erestor didn’t say the words aloud. 
“Thank you for everything.”

Rumil frowned, disliking Erestor’s timid demeanor. “Haldir will take 
my place tomorrow and the Lady Galadriel instructed him to 
accompany you on your first walk.”

Erestor, too tired to continue this conversation, closed his eyes, curled 
up and wished Rumil would go away.

“I will return later,” whispered Rumil in understanding. He decided to 
leave the tray in the room, just in case Erestor got hungry again and 
then left, softly closing the door behind him.

Now that he was finally alone, Erestor released his tears and sobbed 
softly.

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine. 

Heart in Chains.
Part 8.



“Are you ready to go?” Haldir smiled, pleased to find Erestor reading 
one of the books Rumil had brought yesterday. “I trust it is interesting 
lore?”

Erestor was surprised to see Haldir this early. Arien had just risen and 
he hadn’t expected the sentry until the evening. Haldir’s smile was 
infectious and he found himself returning it. “It distracts me.”

“From thinking about Elrond Half-Elven?” Haldir stepped into the 
small room and looked about – really looked about – noticing how 
sparsely furnished the other’s quarters were. 

“I can sense him,” said Erestor slowly. “He is still weak, but growing 
stronger.” The Peredhel was a constant presence in his mind, 
something which he had found distressing at first, but now he was 
learning to enjoy being connected to the half-Elf, as he also felt 
Elrond’s moments of brief happiness and peace. 

Haldir studied the dark-haired Elf. Erestor looked more fragile than he 
used to and the dark eyes seemed dull. “You need to get out into the 
open air.”

“Lord Celeborn is letting me take my walk then?” It was a pity that he 
would have to wait one week before he could go outside again, but at 
least now he had something to look forward to. 

“Aye, I am to accompany you. Is there anywhere special you would like 
to go?”

“Can we avoid crowds? I do not want to encounter other Elves.” 
Erestor had seen their reactions when Galadriel and Celeborn had 
sentenced him millennia ago. Those eyes had been filled with hatred, 
distrust and loathing, and those sentiments wouldn’t have changed. He 
had no desire to feel those menacing eyes on him again. 

“We can walk between the mellyrn, if you desire so.” Haldir raised a 
hand and signaled for Erestor to rise from his chair. “You can continue 
your reading later. ‘Tis much too beautiful a day to stay inside.”

Erestor placed the book aside and slowly got to his feet. “Are you sure 
you do not mind keeping me company? You must have more important 
tasks to carry out.”

Haldir studied Erestor extensively. What had this long imprisonment 
done to the dark-haired Elf? How had it affected him? And could those 
effects be undone? “Follow me outside.”

Erestor complied and together they descended the talan. “Am I not to 
be tied down? Threatened? Are you not worried that I will try to 
escape?” He had long given up on escaping and had accepted his fate. 
He even felt confident enough to lightly tease Haldir.

But Haldir didn’t catch on at once. He was about to answer Erestor’s 
questions in earnest, when he saw an unfamiliar sparkle in the other 
Elf’s eyes. He snorted and led Erestor toward the lake, away from the 
busier sections, giving Erestor the privacy he had asked for. “We will 
be alone here.” 

Erestor nodded appreciatively, taking in his surroundings. Mist was 
rising from the earth and the gentle flow of water soothed his shaky 
nerves. It was impossible to lock out Elrond and the half-Elf was 
distressed at the moment, which caused him to feel distressed as well. 

“Is something wrong?” Haldir saw unease in the hazel eyes.

“I can sense Elrond’s distress,” explained Erestor. “I hope the sensations 
will grow less in time.”

“Does it upset you? Being able to sense his emotions?” Haldir wondered 
what it felt like for Erestor.

“It takes some getting used to,” said Erestor eventually, finding himself 
opening up to the guardian, which surprised him. During his 
imprisonment here they had hardly spoken a word. “In one way it is 
comforting, knowing that I am not alone.”

/Alone,/ mused Haldir, /Aye, you have been very lonely in the past./ 
Recalling there was a garden with healing plants to their right, he 
signaled for Erestor to follow him. 

Erestor easily fell into step beside Haldir, smiling weakly. Walking like 
this, with Haldir close, felt comforting. He could get used to it and 
immediately chided himself. It was stupid to grow attached to Haldir. 
Once the guardian felt he had paid his debt, Haldir would become 
more distant, more reserved. “Where are we headed?”

Haldir pointed at the garden and found that one of Celeborn’s healers 
was tending to the plants. “I thought these plants might be of interest 
to you.”

“That is very thoughtful of you,” said Erestor, surprise evident in his 
voice. He walked into the garden and started to examine and identify 
the healing plants. He wished he would be allowed to tend to them like 
the healer was doing, but Galadriel and Celeborn would never allow it. 

The healer, seeing someone was interested in his plants, moved closer 
and began to explain about their healing qualities. 

Haldir saw Erestor’s confusion and leaned against an oak tree, nodding 
his head to encourage the dark-haired Elf to learn from the older 
healer. A plan was forming in his head, but how would he get Celeborn 
to agree to it? He grinned smugly, seeing the Lord of the Golden Wood 
enter the garden as well. 

Celeborn looked at Erestor in surprise and then searched for Haldir, 
knowing the guardian had to be close. After walking up to Haldir, he 
said, “You brought him here?” 

“Aye, my Lord. Erestor is a healer. What place would be more suited 
for him to learn more about healing?” Slowly, his plan took shape. 
“Think about it, my Lord. He is a gifted healer; I know that because I 
saw him heal Orophin. Wouldn’t it be wise to let the healers teach 
him? Maybe his talents will serve us well in the future.” Haldir waited 
for one moment, pleased that Celeborn was actually considering his 
words. “And now that he is bound to Elrond Half-Elven we should take 
good care of him. When Erestor grows weak, so will the Peredhel.”

Celeborn carefully considered Haldir’s words, knowing the sentry had 
made a valid point. “I take it he could have escaped when Orophin took 
that fall?”

“Aye, but he didn’t. He stayed, and we did not have to ask for his help, 
he simply offered it.” Haldir hoped Celeborn would see things his way. 
“Why not give him part of the garden to tend? Let him study with the 
healers. We can only benefit from his knowledge and talent.”

Celeborn frowned. “Your words sound wise, but…” When Galadriel 
and he had sentenced Erestor to life long imprisonment for taking part 
in the kinslayings, they hadn’t considered the future. Erestor had been 
their prisoner for many millennia now and maybe it was time for some 
changes. /We cannot keep him confined to his room until the end of 
Arda. Not after he rescued Elrond and Orophin./ 

“My Lord?” Erestor, having felt Celeborn’s eyes on him, gingerly 
approached, respectfully inclining his head. “I hope I am not 
trespassing? I do not want Haldir to get into trouble because he brought 
me here.”

Celeborn remained quiet as he continued to study Erestor. He even 
went so far as to probingly touch the dark-haired Elf’s mind, something 
he had never done before. He was surprised when he felt the texture of 
Erestor’s mind, which was warm and open, hiding nothing. Again, he 
wondered how Erestor had ever gotten entangled in the kinslayings. 
Reaching a decision, he said, “Would you like to study with the healers, 
Erestor?”

The dumbfounded expression in Erestor’s eyes made Celeborn chuckle, 
but he quickly steeled his face. Seeing Erestor nod firmly, he hoped he 
was making the right decision. “You may study with them on a daily 
bases, then. Two hours a day. Furthermore, you will be assigned the 
care for part of this garden. As a healer you need to know how to grow 
and harvest these healing plants. The healers will teach you.”

Erestor blinked dazedly and finally found his voice again. “But… I am 
not allowed to venture outside more than once a week.”

“That has changed,” said Celeborn, shrugging his shoulders. “But in 
return I need your word of honor that you won’t try to leave.”

“My word of *honor*? I thought I did not possess any, being a 
murderer.” Erestor instantly regretting lashing out, afraid that Celeborn 
might take back the privileges he had just given him. “I apologize. That 
was uncalled for.” Erestor quickly lowered his eyes, praying to the 
Valar that Celeborn wouldn’t reconsider. “I won’t try to escape.”

Celeborn nodded, sensing Erestor’s conflicting emotions. “I believe you. 
You may study with the healers and tend to this garden. In turn, I want 
you to attend to the needs of the wounded when they need your help.”

“I won’t turn anyone anyway,” promised Erestor, “But I doubt anyone 
will want help from a kinslayer.”

“You always claimed you had no part in it,” said Celeborn in a 
thoughtful tone. Why was he beginning to believe that now?

“I had no part in it,” said Erestor firmly, averting his eyes to look at the 
healer, who was gathering herbs. “I did not kill Rhoss. He was one of 
the few friends I ever had.” But Erestor had long ago convinced himself 
that no one would ever believe him, so he didn’t put any effort into 
trying to convince Celeborn now. “May I return to the healer? He was 
telling me about the plants.”

“Aye.” Celeborn’s eyes narrowed, when Erestor hurried back to the 
healer’s side. “Haldir, did we make a mistake?”

“I asked myself the same question,” said Haldir slowly, watching 
Erestor and seeing the chocolate eyes fill with curiosity and the desire 
to learn. “Orophin found Erestor kneeling beside Rhoss, his fingers 
locked tightly around the hilt of the knife that had been plunged into 
his heart.”

A startling thought drifted into Celeborn’s mind. “Or was he keeping 
the knife in place to make sure there was no extra blood loss?”

Haldir tensed. “Is that possible?”

“Aye, a healer would know better than to remove the knife.” Celeborn 
eyed Erestor closely, realizing there was a possibility that they had 
misjudged the dark-haired Elf. Celeborn was now determined to finally 
discover the truth about Erestor.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two weeks later, Celeborn visited with the healers, inquiring about 
Erestor. They told him that the dark-haired Elf was a very motivated 
student. They were very pleased with the progress Erestor was making 
and told Celeborn that they had never seen such healing strength in an 
Elf before. Erestor had the ability to heal without the use of herbs, 
which was very rare. Celeborn distinctly noticed the proud, approving 
glance in the healers’ eyes, who all hoped Erestor would be allowed to 
continue to work with them. 

After taking his leave, Celeborn considered everything he had learned. 
He was sure the healers would have sensed evil intentions if Erestor 
had them, but they had grown fond of him instead. So what did that 
tell him about Erestor? The more he thought about it, the more he 
tended to believe Erestor when the dark-haired Elf said that he hadn’t 
slain Rhoss. That was a frightening concept. They had condemned 
Erestor to a pitiful life, based on a misunderstanding. 

He had discussed this with Galadriel, but had found that his wife didn’t 
share his opinions. She was still convinced of Erestor’s guilt and refused 
to reconsider the sentence. That left him in a difficult situation; they 
had to present a united front and couldn’t disagree with each other 
openly. 

Reaching the garden, he found that Erestor was harvesting herbs. The 
reverence in the raven-haired Elf’s face told him that Erestor knew 
what these plants could do and how valuable they were. Suddenly 
Erestor’s movements froze; Celeborn realized that the younger Elf had 
sensed his presence and obviously felt uncomfortable around him. 
“Erestor.”

Erestor bowed respectfully and lowered his eyes. “My Lord.” He knew 
how fortunate he was that Celeborn had given him more personal 
freedom and he didn’t dare jeopardize it by challenging the Lord of the 
Golden Wood in any way. It was best to act respectfully and to wait for 
instructions. 

“Walk with me.” Celeborn heard Erestor’s surprised gasp and signaled 
for the other Elf to fall into step beside him.

Gingerly – uncertain why Celeborn wanted to talk to him – Erestor did 
as he was told. “Did I do something to displease you?” Maybe he could 
right any wrongs he had done? 

“I talked to your teachers. The healers are very pleased with you.”

Celeborn’s unexpected praise shocked Erestor. “My Lord?”

“You work hard, are in the open air for hours and yet you remain pale 
– fragile. Why is that?”

Erestor frowned. “My Lord, surely you know that a large part of my life 
energy is now flowing to Elrond Half-Elven?”

Celeborn glanced at Erestor. Aye, he knew, but he hadn’t been aware 
of the fact that Elrond received such a large amount from the other’s 
Elf life energy. And that it would last this long. “Tell me, then. How 
does Elrond fare?”

Erestor swallowed hard. “He is still mourning his lover’s death.”

“But he is no longer thinking about following him to the Halls of 
Waiting?”

“Nay, he has accepted that he will live. I can feel his acceptance.” 
Erestor wondered why Celeborn was bringing this up. “There are even 
brief moments of happiness.”

“Good.” Celeborn’s head was bowed in thought, hands clasped behind 
his back and eyes trained on the ground, as if ‘Lorien’s soil could advise 
him. “And how are *you* dealing with this?”

Erestor was so stunned that he stopped walking. “My Lord?”

Celeborn turned toward him and searched Erestor’s gaze. “I have been 
thinking about this matter. You bound yourself to Elrond, and you are 
strengthening him and yet you receive nothing in return.”

“Nothing? I would not call this nothing.” Erestor stared at the healing 
herbs he was carrying. “You are giving me the chance to find part of 
myself again.”

Celeborn felt humbled, hearing those words. “I am glad you find some 
measure of happiness here.”

“It is the best I could hope for.” Celeborn’s behavior puzzled Erestor, 
but he followed obediently when the Lord of the Golden Wood 
escorted him to the talan where the healers stayed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor startled awake, his hands rubbing his stomach, trying to soothe 
the nausea that had woken him every morning for this last week. Ithil 
had waxed and waned twice since he had bound himself to Elrond and 
he continued to feel weaker. He struggled to sit upright, but when he 
had finally succeeded in doing so, his stomach contracted. Quickly he 
covered his mouth with his hand and stumbled into the bathroom, 
spitting into the sink. 

What was wrong with him? Something was amiss with his body, but he 
was at a loss to what it was. Except for the nausea, he felt tired, bloated, 
and his limbs cramped up during the night. 

Maybe he had overestimated himself two moons ago when he had first 
saved Elrond and then Orophin, and was paying the price for it now. It 
was very well possible that his body was trying to tell him to rest, sleep 
and eat more. But the mere thought of food made his stomach contract 
again. 

Once his stomach was completely empty, he rinsed his mouth with 
water. “What shall I do?” He could ask the healers, but he was fairly 
sure he had merely exhausted himself and that only rest would help. 
But he didn’t want to stop studying with the healers. Celeborn had 
made it very clear that he expected Erestor to commit to his work and 
he was afraid the Lord might reconsider, hearing he had stopped 
attending his lessons.

Nay, returning to his bed to rest was out of the question. He would go 
to bed early tonight, hoping to catch up on his sleep and give his body a 
chance to recover -- as far as it was possible for him to recover. Now 
that he had to share his life energy with Elrond, he would never feel 
whole again. Maybe it would be best to get used to feeling this way.

Erestor forced himself to quickly bathe, and after changing into his 
robes, he left his room to join the healers.

When had the sentries stopped escorting him to the healers’ talan? One 
morning, he had been waiting for one of his jailors to take him to the 
healers, but when Rumil hadn’t shown up, he had grown worried. An 
hour later, one of the healers had appeared at his door, wondering why 
he hadn’t joined them yet. That had been the moment when Erestor 
had realized a bit more freedom had been given to him. Since that day, 
he made his way to the healers’ talan alone, enjoying the peace and 
quiet.

But this morning things were slightly different. He was pre-occupied 
because Elrond was particularly brooding and he felt like he could faint 
any moment now. He had to stop walking and leaned against the trunk 
of a tree. Unexpectedly, strength rose from the ash tree, trying to give 
him the energy he needed to continue his walk. 

After thanking the tree for its gift, he felt strong enough to continue. 

/What if the healers see something is wrong with me? I do not want 
them complaining to Celeborn./ But part of him corrected him; the 
healers cared about him and would never speak badly of him. 

“Erestor? Are you well?” Orophin, who had been on his way to the 
talan he shared with his brothers, happened upon Erestor by accident. 

“I am… tired,” Erestor said slowly, wondering why his chest cramped 
up with pain. “I need to go the healers.”

Orophin nodded. “Aye, you look like you need their help.”

“Help? Nay, I need to study with them.” The chest pain faded, but his 
stomach continued to torment him. He desperately wanted to lie down 
and curl up beneath a warm, sheltering blanket. He almost pulled back 
when Orophin wrapped an arm around his waist. “I am fine. I do not 
need…” He stumbled over his own two feet and would have fallen, had 
it not been for Orophin’s steadying arm. 

“It is Elrond, isn’t it?” Deep lines appeared on Orophin’s brow. “He is 
draining you.”

“Probably,” agreed Erestor.

“Is there anything I can do to help?”

“I doubt it.” Erestor drew in a deep, steadying breath, let it go and then 
nodded once. “I can manage again.”

Orophin reluctantly removed his arm, but continued to keep a close 
eye on Erestor. “I will walk you to the healers’ talan.”

“That won’t be necessary. I can tell you are tired. You should head for 
your own talan and rest.”
 
”I can rest after escorting you,” said Orophin determined. Ever since 
Erestor had saved his life he felt protective of the Elf and seeing Erestor 
in this weakened state worried him. “I will make sure you get there 
without taking a fall.”

Recognizing the determined look in Orophin’s eyes, Erestor gave in. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Camfael felt worried, seeing the state Erestor was in. The dark-haired 
Elf seemed weak, unbalanced and he was ghostly pale. “Is something 
ailing you?” During the last few months the healer had grown fond of 
Erestor, after casting aside any prejudice he might have had against the 
‘kinslayer’. “Will you allow me to examine you?”

Erestor began to shake his head, but then saw Orophin’s disapproval. 
What was the sentry still doing here? “Shouldn’t you head for your 
talan?”

“Not yet. First Camfael will check on you.” Determinedly, Orophin 
crossed his arms in front of his chest. 

“But that is not necessary,” said Erestor pleadingly. “I only need to 
rest.” His eyes widened when his stomach decided to do a series of 
nauseating somersaults. “’Tis a good thing I have not eaten yet today.”

“When was the last time you ate?” Camfael gently eased Erestor down 
onto a bed. “Let me examine you.” By looking in Erestor’s eyes he could 
tell that his student didn’t like that idea, but if necessary, he would 
insist. 

“I ate some soup last night,” said Erestor slowly, closing his eyes to 
compose himself. They opened again, feeling Camfael’s hands unbutton 
his shirt. “I do not think that is nece—“

“Erestor…” Camfael gave his student a look that said, ‘Do not defy me’.

Sighing, Erestor gave in, but then grew aware of the fact that Orophin 
was still present. It was bad enough to feel Camfael’s probing hands, 
but now he had to deal with Orophin’s questioning stare as well. “You 
do not have to stay.”

Orophin finally took pity on the raven-haired Elf and walked over to 
the doorway. “Either I, or one of my brothers will check on you later.”

“That is not neces—“

“Erestor!” Camfael was getting fed up with his student’s behavior. 
“They are worried about you.”

“I know, but…” The idea that someone worried about him was a novel 
experience and he didn’t know how to deal with the attention. “Thank 
you, Orophin,” he said eventually, feeling guilty for trying to brush the 
silver-haired Elf off.

Orophin nodded, smiled, and then left so Camfael could properly 
examine Erestor. Haldir would want to know that something was 
wrong with the dark-haired healer and he hurried to their talan to tell 
his older brother.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Camfael’s hands drifted lower, now probing Erestor’s abdominal region. 
Frowning, he asked, “When did this start?”

“My stomach has been upset for one week now and I just made it to the 
sink in time before dinner made a return visit.” The probing didn’t 
exactly hurt, but as he wasn’t used to being touched in such a way, he 
blushed, embarrassed. “I cannot explain it.”

Camfael’s frown deepened, not believing the conclusion he had 
reached. It was not possible, but there was no other explanation. “Did 
something… out of the ordinary happen about two months ago?”

The healer’s question made Erestor uncomfortable. “Maybe.” He 
couldn’t tell Camfael about the bonding that had taken place back then. 
“Why are you asking?”

“Have you noticed your body changing?” Camfael realized Erestor 
hadn’t when he saw the dumbfounded expression in the brown eyes. 

“Changing?” Erestor swallowed hard. “Camfael, why is my body 
changing?” Startled, he tried to sit upright, but Camfael stopped him. 

“Do not sit up. Rest.” He probed Erestor’s abdomen one last time, 
affirming his first conclusion and then pulled up a chair to sit down. 
There was no way to ask this discretely. “Erestor, did you have 
intercourse two months ago?”

Erestor’s eyes widened. “What?” Why was Camfael asking him 
something that personal?

“Well, did you?” Camfael made sure his voice sounded warm and 
soothing, realizing he would hugely shock Erestor in a moment. The 
younger Elf really had no idea what had happened to him. “Answer my 
question, mellon.”

Erestor released a deep sigh. “Aye, I did.”

Camfael cringed, having to ask his next question. “And you were on the 
receiving end?”

A fierce blush spread over Erestor’s face. “Aye,” he whispered, barely 
audible. He had never thought he would end up discussing this with 
anyone!

“Erestor, this will come as a shock to you,” started Camfael in a kind 
tone, gathering Erestor’s shaky hand in his, “But you have received 
indeed. You are with child.” Although he had prepared himself to deal 
with several reactions, Erestor fainting when hearing this news hadn’t 
been one of them. 

“It really was a shock, then.” He said, smoothing Erestor’s dark hair 
away from the unconscious Elf’s face. “But you are in the best hands. 
We will take good care of you.” It was extremely rare for a male Elf to 
conceive. “I do wonder who the father is,” Camfael mused aloud. “We 
will have to find out.”

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine. 

Heart in Chains.
Part 9.



Erestor sat quietly, staring at the flames that danced in the fireplace. He 
had never thought it possible he could conceive, and finding himself 
pregnant scared him witless. Camfael had done his best to reassure him, 
but the other healer had unwillingly added to his fears by telling him 
that his abdomen had to be opened when the hour of birth arrived. 

/I do not care if I live or die. I want what is best for my child. I do not 
want my baby to grow up in this prison./ Once he had accepted that he 
was pregnant, he had realized what kind of life the little one would 
have and he was already making plans to ensure his child’s safety and 
happiness. 

He hoped he could hide his pregnancy until the moment of birth. In 
the meantime, he hoped he would find someone willing to take this 
innocent, new life out of Galadriel and Celeborn’s reach once the babe 
was born. Maybe one of the healers would help him. He was hesitant to 
ask one of the three brothers, not wanting them to fall into disgrace 
with their Lord and Lady. 

Although he was only in his second month of pregnancy, he already 
cared deeply for the new life inside him. The mere fact that a child was 
growing inside him filled him with awe and respect. /But why is this 
happening to me?/ Was it because he had bound himself to Elrond in 
such a way? 

/I will never find out why and I cannot use up the little energy I have 
left by tormenting myself in that way. I am carrying a new life inside 
me and I have to be careful. No one except for Camfael can find out. 
Once Galadriel and Celeborn learn the truth they will take my child 
away from me or confine the little one to my room. I cannot let that 
happen./

At least he had one person to talk to about his child. Camfael knew and 
had promised to keep his condition a secret, for which he felt grateful. 
/I will need his expertise when my baby is ready to be born./ He just 
had to be very careful not to run into Galadriel or Celeborn by 
accident. Wearing loose robes would hopefully hide his condition. 

Instinctively, his right hand came to rest on his abdomen. It was still 
too early to feel any distension, and he wondered about the miracle 
that was taking place inside his body. “Maybe I can arrange for you to 
be taken to Elrond, little one.” He couldn’t help talking privately to his 
unborn child. The sound of his own voice soothed him. “I can never 
tell Elrond that he is your father, but he might be willing to let you live 
in Imladris, far away from Galadriel and Celeborn.”

“You are brooding,” said Haldir, surprised that the usually alert Erestor 
hadn’t noticed his arrival. 

Hearing the guardian’s soft, melodic voice made Erestor shift uneasily 
on his chair. Normally, he would rise to greet the other Elf, but now he 
felt too drained. “’Tis Elrond,” he lied, knowing that Haldir wouldn’t 
pressure him into revealing his troubled thoughts where the half-Elf 
was concerned. Haldir considered that a private matter and never 
pried. The guardian didn’t disappoint him this time either. The silver-
haired Elf sat down opposite him and Erestor forced himself to meet 
the probing gaze. “What brings you here?”

“Orophin told me you did not feel well earlier today and I wanted to 
check on you.” Although Erestor seemed to have settled back into his 
daily routine, Haldir’s instincts told him that something had upset the 
dark-haired Elf. “Is it something Galadriel has said or done?”

Erestor shook his head. “I am merely tired, Haldir.” 

Haldir studied the dark eyes and found hints of fear and fatigue in 
them. Although Celeborn had assured Erestor that he could go outside 
when he desired so, the healer often preferred the privacy of his room. 
Haldir wondered why. Erestor had been confined to these four walls 
for so long that he had thought the raven-haired Elf eager to go outside 
when possible. But during these last two weeks Erestor had begun to 
lock himself up in here. Haldir cocked his head. “I am sorry to hear 
that. I had hoped you would join me for a walk.” He caught the shivers 
that coursed through Erestor’s body and recalled that the dark-haired 
Elf was afraid of the condemning glances he might receive from the 
Galadhrim. “We can go to your garden.”

“I am honored you would seek out my company,” said Erestor 
carefully, “But I would prefer to stay here and read.”

“Maybe tomorrow evening, then?” Haldir felt reluctant to leave, but 
realized Erestor wasn’t enjoying his company this evening.

“Maybe,” said Erestor without commitment. His right leg was cramping 
up and he hoped Haldir would leave quickly. At the same time, his 
stomach growled loudly, reminding him that he hadn’t eaten much 
today. He had kept his food intake to a minimum, as he didn’t want to 
risk more morning sickness. 

“You are hungry. Let me fetch you something from the kitchens.” 
Haldir’s worries increased, seeing Erestor’s features contract briefly. 
“Are you sure you are fine?”

“As I said before, I am tired, Haldir. Elrond… required a lot of my life 
energy today.” Part of it was a lie. Aye, Elrond still soaked up a large 
part of his energy, but that was not the main reason why he felt this 
tired.

“I will be right back,” said Haldir, rising from his chair. He walked over 
to the doorway and after closing the door behind him, he headed for 
the kitchens. Just what was wrong with Erestor and what could he do 
to remedy it?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Thank you, Haldir,” said Erestor politely, after emptying the plate 
filled with food that Haldir had brought. Once he had begun eating, he 
had been unable to stop until he had devoured everything. “I was 
hungrier than I thought.” He leaned back into the comfort of his chair, 
pushing the empty plate away from him. 

Haldir smiled pleased. “You should rest now.” He got to his feet and 
studied Erestor for one more moment. A soft glow lay in the brown 
eyes, which he had never seen before. Erestor looked contented right 
now. “I will visit with you tomorrow.”

Erestor smiled. “Thank you for caring about me.” It felt good to have a 
friend. Maybe Haldir would help him get his child into safety? But he 
didn’t want to get Haldir into trouble with the Lord and Lady. /I do not 
have to decide this now. It will be ten more months until this little one 
is born./

Seeing Erestor’s eyes were beginning to grow vacant, Haldir excused 
himself, eager for the dark-haired Elf to rest.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You may get dressed again,” said Camfael. He failed to keep his 
concern out of his voice and immediately noticed Erestor’s darkening 
expression. “We need to talk.”

Erestor swallowed hard. Four more moons had waxed and waned and 
he was beginning to show. It was just a small bump, and no one else 
would notice it beneath his loose robes, but he knew it was there.  

After pushing himself to his feet, he gathered his robes and slipped into 
them. He fastened them with a leather belt and then took a seat 
opposite the other healer, whose face was wrinkled with worry. “Is 
anything wrong?” Until now he hadn’t thought of possible 
complications or a miscarriage, but Camfael’s behavior worried him. 

“I would not call it ‘wrong’,” said Camfael thoughtfully. “I assumed you 
were carrying one child, but it appears I was wrong. You are carrying 
twins.” 

Erestor fought for breath. “Twins?” Inwardly, he felt hysterical. Why 
was he surprised? Elrond and Elros were twins as well. “So I am 
carrying twins…”

“This makes your pregnancy even more complicated… and difficult. 
Erestor,” Camfael leaned in closer and gathered Erestor’s right hand in 
his. “There is a possibility that you will not survive the birth. Carrying 
twins will greatly tax your body and you are already in a weakened 
state.”

As Erestor had vowed to keep his bond with Elrond a secret, he had 
never been able to tell Camfael that he shared his life force with the 
half-Elf. The fact that Elrond still needed his life energy to grow 
stronger weakened him in turn, but he couldn’t tell Camfael that. “I 
have a request,” he whispered eventually. 

Camfael nodded once. “I will try to help.”

“I do not want my children to inherit my imprisonment here. I do not 
know how Galadriel and Celeborn will react when they are born, but I 
do not want to condemn my children to my fate. Would you take them 
away from here? Find them a safe and caring home? Maybe in 
Imladris? I heard Elrond Half-Elven is a kind and wise ruler.”
 
Camfael understood Erestor’s motives, but wasn’t sure he could 
comply. “I will do my best to take your children to Imladris. Maybe 
Haldir can also help?” He was Celeborn’s chief healer and his absence 
would immediately be noticed. He couldn’t simply leave Lothlorien 
like that. “I promise you that I will do the best I can.”

Wrapping his arms around his waist, Erestor pleadingly looked at the 
other healer. “What will happen next? What do I do to ensure they 
remain healthy and continue to grow stronger?”

“Most importantly, take good care of yourself, eat and rest. Do not use 
your healing energy in any way whatsoever. Maintain your strength. 
Are you still suffering from morning sickness?”

Erestor shook his head. “It stopped a few days ago, but now I am 
hungry all the time.”

“You are eating for the three of you,” said Camfael thoughtfully. “I will 
tell Lord Celeborn that you are to study in your room in the morning. 
That way you can get some extra rest.”

Erestor nodded thankfully. “I will rest, eat, and take care of myself.” 
But he couldn’t hide how miserable he felt.

“I wish you would reconsider and tell me the father’s name, Erestor. 
You should not have to do this alone. There is another party involved 
and he needs to know he fathered these children.”

“I cannot tell you,” whispered Erestor in a guilty tone. “It is for the best 
that no one knows, and certainly not the father.” He slowly pushed 
himself to his feet, eager to return to the peace and quiet of his room. “I 
never suspected I could be carrying twins,” he mumbled 
absentmindedly. 

“They will be born in six months,” said Camfael, hoping Erestor had 
the strength to survive. “And please consider telling our Lord and Lady. 
I understand your hesitance to confide in them, but I do not share your 
opinion. I do not think they will punish your children for something 
you did millennia ago.”

“I wish I shared your view.” Erestor bowed his head. “But I do not.” He 
was extremely protective of his children and wouldn’t risk their 
freedom. “Please respect my wish to keep this a secret.”

“I will respect your decision, but I do not agree with it.”

“You do not have to,” whispered Erestor dejectedly.

Camfael watched his charge shuffle out of the room. To him, Erestor’s 
fate was a tragic one and he wished he could somehow aid the dark-
haired Elf, but his hands were tied. He had promised Erestor to keep 
this a secret.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor looked up from an ancient scroll, which Camfael had asked him 
to study. It documented two cases of male pregnancy and the healer 
had hoped to reassure him by asking him to read about them. But 
instead, he had grown terrified. Although both Elves had survived 
giving birth, the children had died. He didn’t want to have to bury his 
babies. 

Two more months had passed and still he managed to hide his 
pregnancy, which was becoming increasingly difficult, as his food 
intake was beginning to puzzle Haldir and his brothers. Occasionally 
they would bring him sweet treats, which he immediately devoured. /I 
have to be more careful or they might figure out that something is 
wrong./

His body twitched, feeling one of the babies kick. When he had first 
felt it, he had panicked and hurried to ask Camfael if something was 
wrong, but the healer had smiled and reassured him. Since then, the 
babies had begun to kick more regularly, making it very clear they 
were determined to be born in four months. 

What amazed him was how quickly they were growing. And with that 
realization came the worry that he might not be able to keep his 
pregnancy hidden. /I will have to confide in Haldir shortly./ He had 
hoped to postpone that conversation for a few more months.

“I will make sure you will grow up in freedom.” He didn’t know the 
gender of his children, but his instincts told him he might be carrying 
boys. Knowing that he wouldn’t be able to see them grow up, his eyes 
filled with tears, and again he wondered what he had ever done wrong 
to deserve such a cruel fate. 

“Erestor, we need your help!” Rumil cried franticly as he ran into the 
room. His eyes danced wildly in their sockets and after locating the 
dark-haired Elf, he quickly grabbed Erestor’s hand, dragging him to his 
feet. “You have to help!”

“What happened?” Erestor was unable to stop Rumil when the sentry 
pulled him along. He was quickly growing breathless, but Rumil didn’t 
seem to notice and set an even faster pace.

“A pack of Orcs attacked us and many were wounded.”

Erestor’s heart missed a beat. “Your brothers… Are they…?”

“Haldir and Orophin merely received scratches, but other sentries are 
more seriously injured. The healers cannot identify the poison the Orcs 
used to coat their arrow heads with and now Telu, one of the sentries, 
is dying. The healers have given up on him, but I know you can stop 
him from entering the Great Halls.”

Erestor wanted to object when Rumil pushed him into the tent that 
held the injured. Several gazes, filled with loathing and disapproval, 
fastened on him and he wished the ground would open and swallow 
him, but nothing happened. Instead, he stood frozen. 

“Come with me!” Rumil dragged Erestor along with him and didn’t stop 
until he had reached the last cot. “Telu, I brought help! Erestor will 
heal you!” Telu had saved his life once and the Galadhrim was a skilled 
and respected fighter. Rumil promised himself that they wouldn’t lose 
him. 

“Erestor?” With his remaining strength, Telu’s blue eyes sought out the 
kinslayer. “I do not want his help!” His body convulsed due to the 
poison, which was still spreading through his body. “I would rather die 
than…” He released a scream, filled with pain and horror, sensing his 
fëa was leaving his body. 

Erestor, ghostly pale, wished Rumil would release him so he could run 
back to his room. Hearing those condemning words reminded him that 
most Elves still shunned and hated him. 

“Erestor, he is delirious and does not know what he is saying. Please 
help him! He is a trusted friend and saved my life in the past. He does 
not deserve to die like this.” Rumil pleadingly stared at Erestor. 

“Rumil, I…” Telu’s eyes were closing, now that eternal sleep was upon 
him and Erestor wavered. He knew he could help the injured Elf and 
he was willing to do so in spite of the hatred that the other Elf felt for 
him, but he had to consider his unborn children above all. They needed 
his life energy to grow. By giving it to Telu he might hurt his unborn 
children.

“I knew he would not do it. Once a kinslayer, always a kinslayer,” spat 
Seregon, one of the sentries, who had overheard the conversation. “He 
would rather watch Telu die.”

Erestor’s eyes flared with anger as he sought out the Elf’s hate-filled 
eyes. He wished he could tell them why he was this hesitant. If it 
weren’t for his pregnancy, he wouldn’t have wavered. 

“Heal him,” said Seregon, raising his dagger and holding it against 
Erestor’s throat. “Heal him or experience the same pain Telu is in.”

Rumil hissed and tried to sweep the arm away that held the dagger, but 
the other sentries wouldn’t have it. Hearing the whispers that 
emanated from his fellow Galadhrim, Rumil grew worried for Erestor’s 
well-being. This was turning ugly quickly. “’Tis Erestor’s decision 
whether to heal Telu or not,” he pointed out to them, but they didn’t 
listen. More voices joined in, demanding Erestor heal Telu. 

Erestor panicked when Rumil was pushed away from him. He lost sight 
of the silver-haired Elf and when he tried to look for Rumil, he froze. 
The sharp tip of the dagger was now dipping beneath his skin, drawing 
blood.

“I said; heal him, kinslayer.” 

Tears threatened to spill from his eyes but he held them back, not 
wanting them to see his misery. /What of my babies? Will they 
survive?/ But he didn’t get much time to ponder his dilemma. One of 
the sentries pushed him down onto his knees and he was now level 
with Telu, who was about to release his last breath. 

“Heal him or face our wrath!”

Erestor’s vision became tunnel-like and their voices and enraged 
screams came to him from a great distance. Fighting nausea, he placed 
one hand on Telu’s chest. He wrapped his other arm protectively 
around his own waist, hoping he had enough strength to sustain them 
all. Unable to keep his tears back any longer, they flowed down his 
cheeks as he directed his energy into Telu’s dying body. 

/I will lose my babies… I know I will. I am not strong enough to do 
this. And there is Elrond, who also draws his strength from me. I am so 
sorry, little ones. I did not want this./ Sobbing softly, he no longer felt 
the tip of the dagger that dipped deeper beneath his already bloody 
skin. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Nay, you cannot force him to do this!” Rumil, enraged that his actions 
had caused this, tried to fight his way back to Erestor’s side, but his 
friends stopped him. “Erestor might be too weak! We cannot force 
him!” He had seen Erestor go to the edge before, but it had been 
voluntarily then. There was no way of telling how being forced into 
this would affect the healer. 

Suddenly, Haldir appeared at his side, and Rumil acted at once. 
“Muindor, help me!”

His men’s angry screams had alerted Haldir and he had hurried to the 
tent and inside. He was enraged, seeing Seregon holding a dagger to 
Erestor’s throat. “This is not the way!” One didn’t force a healer to use 
his life energy in that way. His men had gone mad, now that they had 
suffered so greatly due to the Orcs’ attack. “Release him!”

But like Rumil, he failed to stop them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Silent tears dripped down Erestor’s face, feeling the two fragile lights 
inside him fade away and then die. His healing energy was still flowing 
into Telu, saving the sentry from certain death. In this moment of 
terrible loss, he forgot about his duty to Elrond. /Have all of me, then./ 
It was his final act of defiance, giving all of him, hoping his inner light 
would be extinguished along with the twins’. /I want to die…/ He had 
nothing left to live for now that he had lost the twins. Losing 
consciousness, he collapsed onto the floor – one arm still wrapped 
protectively around his waist.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Camfael noticed the commotion too late. Making his way through the 
assembled crowd, his eyes flashed with rage, finding Erestor curled up 
on the floor. He glared at Seregon, who only now removed the blade 
from Erestor’s throat. 

“You had better see to Telu instead of the kinslayer,” said Seregon in a 
pleased tone, now that his friend had been saved from certain death. 

Camfael ordered one of the other healers to look after Telu and then 
gathered Erestor in his arms. The dark-haired Elf was cold and 
motionless in his arms and his instincts told him that Erestor had lost 
his children. “I will deal with the lot of you later,” he said in a booming 
voice. 

The group of sentries finally realized they had crossed the line by 
forcing Erestor to aid Telu, and made way, letting Camfael pass 
unhindered. 

Catching sight of Haldir and Rumil, Camfael called out to them. 
“Rumil, find Lord Celeborn and tell him that I need his assistance. Tell 
him that it is urgent. And Haldir, I need you to come with me.” 
Cradling Erestor’s limp body tightly against his chest, he carried the 
raven-haired Elf to that section of the talan where he could perform 
the necessary surgery on his student. 

Haldir hurried over to Camfael’s side whilst Rumil left in search of 
Celeborn. The two Elves were greatly worried, seeing Erestor this still. 
“What happened to him? Did he use too much of his life energy?”

Camfael’s jaw was set firmly, as he marched over to the cot that would 
serve as his operating table. “I do not have the time to explain. Haldir, 
undress Erestor and keep your eye on him. Should he regain 
consciousness, tell me!” He then left to retrieve healing herbs, surgical 
instruments and bandages. He also instructed his students to heat lots 
of water. 

Haldir swallowed hard, seeing the empty expression in Erestor’s eyes. 
When Erestor had healed Orophin, the raven-haired Elf had been 
exhausted as well, but conscious and coherent. Erestor’s current 
condition filled him with dread. He pulled up a chair and sat down 
beside Erestor. One of the raven-haired Elf’s hands rested in his and he 
rubbed the icy skin, whilst mumbling softly. “Camfael will take good 
care of you, Erestor. Please hold on.”

Camfael entered the room again. Seeing Haldir this concerned he 
wondered if maybe the march warden was the father of Erestor’s 
children. He would find out quickly enough. “I told you to undress 
him!”

Haldir flinched at Camfael’s hard tone. “My worries—“

Camfael cut him short. “Help me now, then!” He gently pulled Erestor 
in a sitting position and supported the other Elf whilst Haldir removed 
the cloak and robes, which Erestor was wearing.

Haldir frowned when removing Erestor’s undergarments, finding the 
dark-haired Elf had put on weight. But that shouldn’t surprise him, 
recalling the large amount of food Erestor had eaten these last few 
months. 

Camfael had watched Haldir closely and it was obvious to him that the 
sentry had no idea about the condition Erestor was in. Now that 
Erestor was naked, he eased his charge back onto the cot. Ignoring 
Haldir for now, he concentrated on Erestor. His hands probed his 
patient’s abdominal area and his worst suspicions were confirmed. “He 
really has lost them.”

Haldir cringed at the defeated tone in Camfael’s voice. “He lost what?” 
He felt seriously confused now that the healer continued to examine 
Erestor’s abdominal area. “What are you talking about?” 

“He did not tell you? He said he would.” Camfael needed a moment to 
compose himself. Against all odds, he had hoped that Erestor and the 
babies would be all right eventually. 

“Told me what?” Growing suspicious, Haldir cocked his head. Camfael 
took him by surprise when the healer took hold of one of his hands and 
placed it on Erestor’s abdomen. Frowning, he realized he felt some sort 
of mass beneath the soft skin. 

“He was pregnant. Erestor carried twins.” 

Camfael’s words shocked Haldir. “Pregnant? But how? Why? When?” 
His mind was trying hard to accept what Camfael had told him, but 
part of him dismissed it as impossible. “Male Elves do not become 
pregnant!” Camfael had reached the wrong conclusion, was lying to 
him… That had to be it! This couldn’t be the truth!

“It is extremely rare, but not impossible.” Camfael drew in a deep 
breath; he had to know! ”Haldir, are you the father? Did you bed him 
eight months ago?”

Haldir’s eyes widened in disbelief. “What?” His thoughts began to race. 
“Eight months ago?” Erestor had bound himself to Elrond eight months 
ago. /These were Elrond’s children./ Then something else registered. 
“Twins? He lost both of them?”

“I can no longer sense their inner lights.” Camfael slowly realized that 
Haldir had had no part in this. “It must have happened when those 
fools forced him to heal Telu. The life energy Telu received was meant 
to keep the children alive. Erestor simply was too weak to sustain the 
four of them.”

Haldir swayed and had to reach for the wall to steady himself. “By the 
Grace of the Valar…” /The *five* of them! Elrond also draws his 
strength from Erestor. What did we do?/

“I will have to remove the dead fetuses. If I do not do it, we will lose 
Erestor as well.” Camfael wished he had arrived sooner. Maybe he 
would have been able to prevent this tragedy.

Haldir nodded. He still felt shaky, but he would do whatever he could 
in order to help. /Erestor never told Elrond. I would have known if a 
messenger had been dispatched to Imladris. He suffered in silence./ 
That fact saddened him immensely. 

Unexpectedly, the door opened and Celeborn, quickly followed by 
Rumil, marched inside. Seeing Camfael and Haldir’s distressed 
expressions, Celeborn knew something was terribly amiss. Then his 
gaze was drawn to Erestor’s naked form. As he too was trained in the 
art of healing, he noticed Erestor’s distended stomach. Haldir’s hand 
still rested atop of it. Uncertain what conclusion to draw, he looked to 
Camfael for an explanation. “What ails him?”

Camfael drew himself to his full height, knowing he needed to be 
strong and calm for Erestor’s sake. “Erestor suffered a miscarriage, 
losing the twins he was carrying.” 

For one terrible moment Celeborn found that his heart had stopped 
beating. Time stood still, hearing this terrible news. “He was pregnant?” 
He had never noticed a thing! “Are you sure?” How could this have 
happened? Galadriel hadn’t mentioned this to him. Had she known or 
had the mirror simply not shown her this would happen?  He would 
ask her later.

“Convince yourself.” Camfael removed Haldir’s hand from Erestor’s 
abdomen and waited for Celeborn to check for himself. He suspected 
Celeborn knew more about this, but it didn’t look like his Lord would 
enlighten him.

Celeborn looked over his shoulder at Rumil, hearing the younger Elf 
release a strangled whimper. Rumil hadn’t known either, then. 
Walking toward their patient, he repeated Camfael’s earlier 
examination. “You are right. He suffered a miscarriage.” How could this 
have escaped his attention? /Camfael said twins. Erestor truly carried 
Elrond’s heirs, then./ Saddened by the realization that Erestor had lost 
both babies, he met Camfael’s condemning gaze. “I never wanted for 
this to happen.”

Camfael knew it wasn’t his place to ask, but he did it anyway. “Are you 
their father?”

Celeborn sighed deeply. “Nay, I am not.” He didn’t feel offended by 
Camfael’s question, understanding why the healer wanted to know. 
Realizing he had to take charge, he looked at Haldir. “Camfael and I 
will take care of Erestor. Your services are no longer needed.”

Haldir swallowed hard. He wanted to stay, but couldn’t defy Celeborn. 
Glancing at Rumil, he saw the guilt and shock in his brother’s eyes and 
realized he had to get him out of here. “Rumil, come with me.” He 
wrapped an arm around Rumil’s shoulder and pulled him along. 

The moment Haldir and Rumil had left, Celeborn sought out Camfael’s 
eyes. “I do not know what happened to cause him to miscarry, but I 
will find out.”

“I can spare you the effort,” said Camfael in an angry tone. “Your men 
forced Erestor to heal one of their wounded. They threatened him. 
When I came upon him there was a knife against his throat.”

Celeborn hung his head in shame. “I will discipline the ones 
responsible for this.”

“You can do that later. Now I need your assistance and expertise. I am 
afraid Erestor knows he lost them and is yearning to be admitted to the 
Great Halls of Waiting. I need your strength to pull him back if 
necessary.”

“I will do what I can,” promised Celeborn. “No one should have to bury 
their babies.” His heart ached in pain at the mere thought. After this 
surgery was over he would talk to Galadriel. They had to decide 
whether to tell Elrond or not.

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine.

Heart in Chains.
Part 10.


“’Tis is my fault,” said Rumil, feeling miserable and guilty. Haldir had 
taken him back to their talan and had then sat him down on his bed. 
Rumil wrung his hands and bowed his head in shame. “My fault.”

Haldir, at a loss to what was wrong with his younger brother, seated 
himself next to Rumil. Wrapping an arm around his distressed brother’s 
shoulder, he asked, “What is?” 

“That Erestor lost his children.” Rumil suddenly looked Haldir in the 
eyes, pleading with him. “I did not know! I truly did not know he was 
carrying Elrond’s children! If I had known I would never have dragged 
him along!”

“Dragged him to Telu?” Slowly, Rumil’s raving and distress were 
beginning to make sense to Haldir. 

“Aye! Erestor healed Orophin and I thought he could heal Telu as well! 
I never waited for him to say yes! I simply dragged him along and then 
everything went wrong!”

Haldir listened patiently to his brother’s raving, realizing Rumil needed 
to get this off his chest. “Go on.”

“Seregon took charge, and put his dagger against Erestor’s throat. 
Erestor never had a choice! Aiya, Muindor-nîn, Erestor lost his 
children! Did you know that—“ 

Haldir squeezed Rumil’s shoulder reassuringly. “Nay, I did not.”

“If only he had confided in us! Haldir, why did he not tell us? Did he 
not trust us? I know we were not kind to him in the past, but… I 
thought he was beginning to realize we meant well!” Tears gathered in 
his eyes and he wiped his nose with his sleeve. “I never wanted to 
endanger Erestor. I did not know! Did not know!”

Haldir now resorted to rocking his younger brother and was reminded 
of a time when Rumil had been an Elfling. He had consoled Rumil back 
then as well, when his brother had missed his parents. “It was not your 
fault, Rumil. Seregon is to blame. It was not your fault.”

“But he lost them!” Rumil raised his right hand, which had turned into 
a fist and slammed it into his older brother’s chest. 

Haldir barely felt the blow, and tightened his hold, rocking Rumil 
harder. “I am sorry this happened, but you are not to blame. We have 
to put our trust in Celeborn and Camfael, and hope that Erestor will 
find the strength and willpower to return to us.”

“What will this do to him, Haldir?” Rumil raised his swimming eyes 
and pleadingly stared at his brother. “It took him so long to start 
coming out of his shell and he was just beginning to trust us. Will we 
really lose him now?”

“I do not know, Rumil,” said Haldir honestly. “All we can do is pray to 
the Valar for Erestor’s survival… and then we wait.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Orophin was restless and glad his watch was over. His instincts told 
him to hurry and he quickly arrived at the talan which he shared with 
his brothers. Stepping into the bedroom, he found Haldir and Rumil on 
the bed. Haldir had protectively curled himself around their brother, 
whose eyes were still red from crying. “What happened here?” At a 
loss, he sat down on the side of the bed.

The movement woke Haldir, who quickly grew aware of his brother’s 
agitation. It came as no surprise that Orophin had picked up on Rumil’s 
distress. The three of them had always been close. 

“Why is Rumil upset?”

Whispering softly so as not to wake Rumil, Haldir told Orophin what 
had occurred. In his younger brother’s eyes, Haldir detected a strong 
sense of loss. “Erestor told no one. Rumil did not know that he was 
pregnant and now he blames himself.”

“This is sad news indeed,” whispered Orophin, distressed. “It is just like 
Rumil to blame himself for something he had no control over. Has 
there been any news on Erestor’s condition yet?”

“Nay, I will ask Camfael in the morning. There is nothing we can do at 
any rate.” Haldir’s heart ached for Erestor, but he was realistic enough 
to know he couldn’t help the dark-haired Elf. What Erestor needed was 
an experienced and determined healer. “Come, join us. Rumil needs us 
close.”

Orophin removed his weapons and cloak and then lay down in front of 
Rumil, embracing his brother. “I feel sad for Erestor.”

“I share your sadness,” said Haldir softly. Rumil groaned in his sleep, 
and Haldir soothingly stroked his younger brother’s hair. “If only we 
had known. Even Celeborn did not seem to know. He was shocked 
when Camfael told him.”

Sudden anger overwhelmed Orophin. “This is Galadriel and Celeborn’s 
fault to begin with! They ordered Erestor to bind himself to Elrond 
without the half-Elf knowing about it! And then they ordered Erestor 
to return to Lothlorien *after* he bonded with Elrond. Erestor should 
be in Imladris with Elrond, and not here! Maybe Elrond could have 
kept Erestor safe.”

Haldir nodded. “I cannot help but wonder what Erestor’s plans for the 
twins were. Did he hope to give birth to them without anyone 
knowing about it and then have them smuggled to Imladris?” What 
role did Camfael play in this? 

“It is possible, aye. Had he asked me, I would have taken the twins to 
Imladris to be with their other parent.” Orophin found it hard to accept 
such a tragedy had happened during his absence. 

“I wonder if Galadriel and Celeborn plan to tell Elrond he lost two 
sons.” Haldir was frustrated. He felt Elrond should know, but at the 
same time, this knowledge would cause the recovering half-Elf even 
more pain. 

“I doubt it,” said Orophin. “Why would they?” Feeling sad and angry at 
the same time, he wished he could protect Erestor from the Lord and 
Lady’s scheming, but they were mere sentries.

As if reading Orophin’s thoughts, Haldir said, “We will do the best we 
can. We will be there for Erestor… if he survives… and I pray to 
Elbereth that he does!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Celeborn covered Erestor’s icy body with several warm blankets and 
then stood back, studying the dark-haired Elf’s sunken features. Erestor 
had literally been drained of his life force when healing Telu and the 
healer’s inner light was barely strong enough to keep him alive. 
Celeborn had tried to lend Erestor his strength -- but the bond which 
Erestor had formed with Elrond had prevented that -- not letting the 
raven-haired Elf form a temporary healing bond with the Lord of the 
Golden Wood. 

Camfael soundlessly entered the room, not wanting to disturb 
Celeborn’s musings. Performing surgery had taken them many hours. 
They had removed the fetuses, which had caused severe blood loss. 
Several times during surgery he had feared losing Erestor, but the dark-
haired Elf had somehow survived. Erestor was now scarred for life; an 
ugly scar on his abdomen would always remind him of his miscarriage. 

“I beg your forgiveness for interrupting your thoughts,” began Camfael, 
bowing respectfully, knowing quite well that without Celeborn’s 
knowledge and expertise Erestor would have died hours ago. “But I 
need to know what to do with the…dead children.” At eight months, 
almost nine, the fetuses had easily been identified as males. Erestor had 
lost two sons. 

Fatigued and feeling lost, Celeborn looked at the healer. “What do you 
advise?”

Camfael moistened his lips. “Providing Erestor survives, having a place 
where he can go to mourn his sons’ deaths will help him recover. 
Maybe a small tomb in a more secluded section of the Golden Wood?” 
He hoped Celeborn would follow his advice. The twins deserved a 
worthy resting place.

“Aye,” said Celeborn, nodding his head. “I will see to it.” Slowly, 
feeling ancient and exhausted, he got to his feet. “I need to speak with 
my Lady now, but I will visit with Erestor tomorrow.”

“If he is still alive then.” When Celeborn flinched, Camfael felt oddly 
satisfied. “If you know the father’s identity I strongly urge you to tell 
him what happened. He should be at Erestor’s side, supporting him. 
Erestor should not have to do this on his own.”

Celeborn’s shoulders slumped. “I will consider it.” Placing the palm of 
his hand on Erestor’s brow, he frowned, finding how cold the Elf’s skin 
was. “Take good care of him.”

“I will.” Camfael watched Celeborn leave and thought he saw defeat in 
the Elf’s slumped shoulders. He pulled up a chair and sat down next to 
the bed, gathering Erestor’s hand in his. For the first time in his life he 
wished he possessed Erestor’s natural healing talents, for then he could 
truly have aided his charge. All he could do now was wait.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Galadriel was not pleased when Celeborn unexpectedly entered her 
private rooms. Several of her ladies were with her and she glared at her 
husband. She had told him on several occasions that she needed these 
private moments of mindless chatter. They stopped her thoughts from 
racing and allowed them to slow down. Forcing herself to act politely, 
she greeted him and dismissed her ladies. 

“We need to talk.” Celeborn sensed her frustration and realized this 
conversation was already off to a bad start. 

“What about?” Reluctantly she rose from the sofa and joined him, as he 
was staring out of the window at the ancient mallorn trees. 

“Erestor.”

Sensing her husband’s emotional turmoil she realized she had to tread 
carefully. “Why do we need to discuss him?”

“He suffered a miscarriage and lost Elrond’s sons.” Celeborn looked at 
her, wondering if she had known.

She raised an eyebrow but didn’t show any emotion at learning this. 
“Then it was the will of the Valar and it was right that we did not 
know this would happen.”

Celeborn stared at her in disbelief. “How can you be so… calm?” 
/Cold?/ “Distant? Like this does not touch you.”

“It does not matter to me that he had a miscarriage. Erestor served his 
purpose when he bonded with Elrond.”

“Is that your only concern?” Celeborn understood her reasoning at 
once. “You want Erestor alive so he can sustain Elrond, but his personal 
welfare does not concern you?”

“He is a murderer, Celeborn. When did you start to worry for a 
kinslayer?”

The hair at the back of his neck grew rigid hearing her voice, which 
was bereft of emotion. He shuddered and averted his eyes, unable to 
hold her gaze any longer. She turned around and left the room. 
Celeborn actually felt relieved that she had left and collapsed onto a 
chair. He didn’t want to admit this, but at times Galadriel scared him. 
Something would happen to remind him of the fact that she was 
related to Feanor. Blood as cold and cunning as his flowed through her 
veins. These were the moments when he wondered where that noble 
woman was who he had fallen in love with.

He loved her, truly loved her, but she also frightened him. The 
question was, did he love her enough to support her decisions and stay 
with her?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning found Camfael still holding his vigil at Erestor’s bed. 
During the night his patient hadn’t stirred, and although he had tried 
to make Erestor drink some water, the dark-haired Elf had proven 
uncooperative. He was beginning to realize that losing Erestor to 
Mandos was quickly becoming a reality. 

After rising from his chair, he stretched and called for some 
refreshments. Sitting on his heels next to Erestor’s bed, he probed his 
patient’s empty gaze. Throughout many centuries he had gathered 
much knowledge and he suspected that Erestor was conscious, but just 
not reacting. The raven-haired Elf had no reason to acknowledge him, 
as Erestor was probably still pining for the Great Halls of Waiting. 
“Please come back to me, Erestor. It is not your time yet, I know that. 
Your role on Middle-Earth has not yet been fulfilled.” But Erestor 
didn’t react. 

Camfael lovingly stroked Erestor’s clammy hair. “I know you can hear 
me. You are just too stubborn to react.” Drawing in a deep breath, he 
made one final attempt. “My son long reached his majority and married 
a lovely maiden, leaving me alone. Since you began to study here I 
found I enjoy your company and I looked forward to your visits. Please 
do not leave me alone again.”

Erestor moaned softly, but did not react verbally. 

“I need to eat something and inform our Lord of your condition, but I 
promise to be back within the hour.” Erestor merely stared at the wall, 
worrying Camfael further. “We do not want to lose you.” 

But it appeared Erestor had already made up his mind and refused to 
return to them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haldir had been waiting for Camfael in the corridor and when the 
healer finally emerged, he bombarded him with questions. “I assume 
Erestor is still alive? Is he already awake? Talking? Does he know he 
lost the twins? Is there anything I can do to help? How—“

Camfael stopped Haldir by raising a hand. “Too many questions… Why 
do you not go inside and visit with him?” He hoped that Haldir’s 
presence would bring Erestor back from whatever lonely place his 
mind was hiding in. “He might not respond to you, but do not give up.”

Haldir swallowed hard. “He has withdrawn into himself?”

“Aye.” Camfael nodded once. “Would you stay with him until I return? 
I need to eat, rest, and change into clean clothes.” He hadn’t had any 
rest since they had performed surgery on Erestor.

“I will stay with him. There is no need for you to hurry.” Haldir -- 
growing nervous now that he was about to face Erestor -- shuffled into 
the room. 

Camfael closed the door behind the sentry, hoping Haldir would get 
through to Erestor. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haldir’s heart contracted with emotion, seeing the despair in Erestor’s 
eyes. “Oh, meldir!” He hurried over to the dark-haired Elf’s side and sat 
down on the chair Camfael’s had vacated earlier. 

“I wish you had told us that you were pregnant. I understand why you 
did not do it, why you thought you had to do this on your own, but I 
wish things had gone differently.” Sliding closer on his chair, he gently 
stroked Erestor’s hair. “You saved Orophin from certain death and you 
have grown precious to us in these last nine months. I wish you would 
not turn your back on us when we offer you our help.”

Holding his breath, he saw the despair in Erestor’s eyes shatter and 
tears appeared instead. He only now grew aware of the fact that Erestor 
was hugging his waist and one hand was rubbing his stomach, as if 
trying to convince himself that he hadn’t lost his children. 

“Ai, my heart aches for you.” Overwhelmed with emotion, Haldir 
moved onto the bed, lying down in front of Erestor and slowly 
wrapping his arms around him. He waited apprehensively, uncertain 
Erestor would accept the offered comfort. “I cannot imagine the loss 
you feel, but please accept what I am offering.” 

For one long, seemingly endless moment nothing happened.  Then 
Erestor began to sob against him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The dam broke and Erestor released the flood of despair, fear, anger 
and utter sadness which he felt. He had tried to shut them out. Locking 
out Camfael had been hard, but he had managed.  However, now that 
Haldir was holding him – comforting him – he couldn’t continue to 
ignore him.

Sobbing hard in Haldir’s arms, he pressed his cold body against the 
sentry’s warmth. Unable to stop himself, he wrapped his arms around 
Haldir, squeezing as hard as he could – which wasn’t hard at all, as he 
was still weak from surgery.

Why did Haldir have to come to him? He wanted to fade, to finally 
enter the Great Halls of Waiting. Now that he had lost his babies, he 
felt lost and alone. When he had first felt his flat stomach he had 
thought he would die that instant, but Mandos didn’t want him, forcing 
him to continue to dwell on Arda.

Haldir soothingly caressed his hair and the Galadhrim continued to 
mumble soft reassurances. 

“D-don’t… P-please don’t-t…” He didn’t want to hear Haldir calling 
him a friend and offering him comfort. He wanted to leave Arda, but 
how could his fëa flee when Haldir was doing his best to make him 
stay? “Let-t… m-me… goooo…”

“I am sorry, but I cannot do that.” Haldir rubbed Erestor’s cold and 
shaking back, trying to convince the hurting Elf that he cared. “I had to 
forbid Rumil and Orophin to come along, knowing their presence 
would overwhelm you, but they suffer with you. You are not alone.”

Erestor closed his eyes, but tears still slipped from beneath his eyelids. 
“How-w c-can I… go oooo-nn… with…out… them-m?” How could he 
find his way back, when a sea of loneliness was pulling him under? He 
felt like he couldn’t breathe, like he was choking, when in truth he was 
sobbing himself to pieces.

“Oh, meldir, hold onto me and allow me to be your strength. If you 
were not bound to Elrond Half-Elven I would bind myself to you so 
you could draw from my life energy. My brothers and I greatly care for 
you and we want to see you healed. I know it will take a lifetime for 
you to heal, but time heals all wounds.”

“N-ot-t… m-mine…”

“Even yours, no matter how terrible your wound is.” Haldir felt slightly 
relieved now that Erestor was talking to him. “I am so sorry you lost 
your sons. I am sure they would have been valiant warriors one day… 
or gifted healers.”

Haldir’s words caused Erestor to cry harder, forcing him to release the 
pain that he was holding inside. He had clung to it in the hope that it 
would make him fade. “S-ons-s…” His instincts had been right then. 
He had been carrying sons. Sons, whom he would never hold, cuddle 
and watch grow up. “Why? W-why?”

“Life is not fair,” said Haldir eventually. “I do not know why. I wish I 
had a better answer for you.” Rocking Erestor, much like he had rocked 
Rumil earlier, he began to sing the same lullaby Celeborn had sung 
when he and his brothers had been children. It had soothed him and 
his brothers back then and he hoped it would soothe Erestor now.

Erestor shook like a leaf, recognizing that lullaby; it was the one Elwing 
used to sing when putting Elrond and Elros to sleep. /Elrond, I tried to 
keep our babies alive, but I failed. I should have been stronger, should 
have told Seregon ‘no’, but I am a coward. I hoped I could divide my 
strength and keep them alive as well./ He prayed to Nienna, begging 
the mighty Vala to keep this from Elrond until the end of Arda. /Please, 
Elrond can never find out that I killed our babies. I should have been 
stronger, should have refused, should have…/ 

“Shst, try to rest. Try to sleep. You are exhausted – mentally and 
physically. This is not the time to talk about this. And please, Erestor, 
do not blame yourself for this.” Haldir raised Erestor’s face until their 
eyes met, recalling Rumil blaming himself as well. “Seregon – the fool – 
is to blame, never you. You wanted what was best for your babies.”

But Erestor couldn’t – wouldn’t – believe Haldir. He knew he had been 
weak and that he was guilty of losing their sons. He would make 
himself pay for his cowardice for the rest of his life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Camfael returned several hours later, he found Erestor fast 
asleep, with Haldir protectively curled around him. He instantly 
noticed Erestor’s red eyes and felt relieved, realizing his charge had let 
go of some of his emotions. Maybe there was still hope then. Maybe 
they could reclaim Erestor. 

“How does he fare?” He spoke softly, unwilling to wake Erestor from 
what appeared to be the first stage of a healing sleep. He placed the 
tray, filled with herbal tea and bread on the side table and then seated 
himself. Hopefully Erestor would be able to eat and drink something 
later. 

“He opened up to me and sobbed in my arms. He is so fragile that I fear 
for him.” Haldir never wanted to let go of Erestor, but his watch began 
at sunset. /Maybe Orophin can sit with Erestor until I return./ He 
didn’t want to ask Rumil, who was emotionally unbalanced as well. But 
then again, they couldn’t leave Rumil alone either. Sighing, he realized 
this was more complicated than he had originally thought. 

“I will watch over him now,” said Camfael, “but you may visit with him 
whenever you want. I hope to see you frequently, for your presence 
seems to be helping Erestor recover.”

“I will be here as often as I can. May I hold him a little longer? I have 
to leave within the hour at any rate.” Haldir continued to rub Erestor’s 
back, trying to create some warmth, and his charge moved closer in his 
arms, apparently savoring the sensation. /Elrond should be here 
comforting you, not I./ He had entertained the idea of sending Elrond a 
message, but his loyalty to his Lord and Lady kept him from executing 
his plan. He couldn’t go behind their backs. 

“The one who fathered his children should be offering him his 
support.” Camfael’s eyes narrowed. “Do you know who sired the 
twins?”

Feeling cornered, Haldir averted his eyes. “I do, but I am not allowed to 
tell you. I have been sworn to secrecy by our Lady.” 

Camfael hated them for their secrecy. “Celeborn refused to tell me as 
well. I do not understand why. Having his mate here would greatly aid 
Erestor’s recovery. The fact that he regained consciousness for a short 
while does not mean he will recover. First, he has to accept the twins’ 
death and then he has to go through a long and extensive mourning 
process. He will need all the support he can get.”

Before asking his next question, Haldir made sure Erestor was still 
sound asleep. “What did Celeborn order to be done with their… little 
bodies?”

“I advised our Lord to have a small tomb constructed, which will hold 
their remains. Erestor will need to say goodbye and having a place to go 
to mourn will help.”

Haldir sighed. “I agree. And will Celeborn follow your advice?”

“I think so. He was fairly shaken when he realized what had happened. 
I have seldom seen him so sad as when he assisted me during surgery. 
Celeborn is a father himself and the thought of losing Celebrian fills 
him with terror as well. That reminds me,” said Camfael softly, 
“Celeborn will visit with Erestor shortly. He has also requested to be 
regularly informed on Erestor’s condition. Erestor might find a 
protector in Celeborn after all.”

“Celeborn is a just and wise ruler.” He didn’t want to say aloud that 
Galadriel at times intimidated him. There was something ruthless about 
her that warned him to never cross her. 

“Aye, he is.” 

Haldir, seeing Arien’s descent in the sky, knew it was time to leave 
Erestor and go join his men. He regretted having to untangle himself 
from Erestor, as he would have loved to hold him as long as Erestor 
needed him. “I know you will take good care of him.”

“I will,” promised Camfael. 

Erestor moaned his protest when Haldir left the bed and he shivered 
violently, growing cold again. Haldir tucked the blankets around 
Erestor’s shivering form, feeling guilty for leaving the dark-haired Elf 
in this way. “I will hurry back to you,” he promised in a soft voice.

But Erestor didn’t hear him and whimpered softly. He pulled his knees 
up to his chest, wrapped his arms around them and remained in that 
fetal position.

Haldir and Camfael exchanged a worried look. “You had better keep 
that promise,” said the healer eventually. “Right now, you are the only 
thing holding him here on Arda with us.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Celeborn cleared his throat when he entered Erestor’s room, not 
wanting to startle the injured Elf. But when he approached the bed, he 
realized that Erestor was unresponsive and blindly staring at the wall. 
Next to the bed sat Camfael, who now placed a cup of tea on the 
nightstand.

“Camfael?” Celeborn came to a stand still in front of the bed and made 
eye contact with his chief healer. 

“He is aware of our presence, but not inclined to communicate with 
us.” Camfael rose from his chair and signaled for Celeborn to follow 
him into a corner of the room. Erestor wasn’t interested in what they 
were saying and would not eavesdrop, but he didn’t want to disturb his 
charge with their conversation. “Erestor refuses to drink and eat, and 
he won’t talk to me. The one time he showed some emotion was when 
Haldir was here.”

“Haldir?” Celeborn frowned. 

“But he had to leave for his watch. My Lord, if it is possible please 
relieve Haldir from his duties for a short while. If you want to keep 
Erestor alive, having Haldir close would help.”

“I will arrange for it.” Celeborn decided not to tell Camfael about his 
wife’s reaction to the news and asked instead, “Is there anything else I 
can do to help?”

“Aye, there is.” Before he continued, Camfael lowered his voice. “The 
twins…”

“The other healers are wrapping them up in the softest fabric they can 
find and I already ordered for the construction of the tomb to start. We 
can respectfully put them to rest in two days.”

Camfael’s eyes filled with pity for Erestor. “I doubt he will be able to 
attend.”

“I understand. I will take his place then and put the little ones to rest.” 

Camfael heard the sorrow and regret in the older Elf’s voice. “There is 
one other thing you can do for Erestor.”

Celeborn waited patiently. 

“Erestor needs his mate close. Working through the loss of his children 
will be an impossible task for him if he has to do it alone.”

“I wish I could tell their father, but I cannot,” whispered Celeborn, 
who was regretting his past decisions. He should never have agreed to 
Galadriel’s plan to save Elrond. The price that Erestor was paying was 
much too high. Seeing Camfael’s disapproving expression he tried to 
explain. “The twins’ father is in a bad way as well. Although he is 
recovering from a traumatic event, he does not yet have the strength to 
support Erestor. It is up to us to pull him through.”

Camfael realized Celeborn wouldn’t tell him the father’s identity and 
knew when to stop pressuring someone. A knock on the door supplied 
him with the necessary distraction. “Enter!”

Rumil and Orophin hesitantly shuffled into the room. Rumil had 
bathed, changed his clothes and felt slightly more in control of his 
emotions, but when he saw Erestor’s rumpled form, a lump of emotions 
formed in his throat. /I did not want this to happen. I am so sorry./

Orophin, sensing that Rumil was slipping back into his guilt, quickly 
squeezed his brother’s shoulder. “We wondered if Erestor was up to 
receiving visitors. We will be quiet. We merely wish to sit with him.”

Recalling the healing influence Haldir had had on Erestor, Camfael 
nodded his approval. “You may sit with him. Try to make him eat and 
drink something.” 

Rumil and Orophin made their way over to Erestor’s bed. One of them 
sat down on the side of the bed, whilst the other now occupied the 
chair. They would sit with Erestor until Haldir returned; making sure 
Erestor was never alone.

Celeborn watched them. Galadriel and he had raised Haldir, Rumil and 
Orophin as if they were their own children and he greatly loved them. 
/I do not know how I would have reacted, had we lost them. Oh, 
Erestor, I wronged you./ 

Celeborn was determined to make amends to the hurting Elf. /We 
won’t give up on you./

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine. 




Heart in Chains.
Part 11.



“Please, Erestor, drink some water. You need the fluids.” Haldir was 
growing desperate now that the dark-haired Elf was shutting him out 
again. 

When the word had reached him that Celeborn wanted him to return 
to Erestor’s side, he had acted at once. After handing over control to his 
second in command, he had hurried back. Upon his arrival, he found 
that his brothers were keeping a vigil at Erestor’s bed, and both Elves 
had been distressed because Erestor continued to lock them out. The 
grieving Elf still refused water and nourishment. 

During these last thirty-six hours, Camfael, Celeborn, Rumil, Orophin 
and Haldir had tried to convince Erestor to drink some water, but to no 
avail. Haldir was now afraid that Erestor would fade after all, and 
doubled his efforts to force the grieving healer to stay with them. 

Haldir had slipped between the covers, warming Erestor’s still icy body 
with his own. His fingers tangled in the long, raven hair and his other 
hand reassuringly rubbed Erestor’s back. “You have to be strong, 
meldir. You cannot give in to despair. You are a fighter and will 
survive.”

He had been talking to Erestor for hours. His throat felt raw and he 
sounded hoarse, but Erestor still didn’t react. “I am sorry that I left you 
alone, but I had to lead my men into the woods. The moment Lord 
Celeborn gave his permission, I hurried back to you. I know you feel 
hurt and maybe even betrayed because I left, but I am back now and I 
will stay at your side as long as you need me.” He rocked Erestor slowly 
in his arms, trying to make the dark-haired Elf feel cherished and cared 
for. 

When Camfael and Celeborn entered, Haldir sought out their eyes. 
First he studied Camfael’s and he then locked gazes with Celeborn, 
who looked troubled. Neither Elf had had had much sleep and dark 
circles were beginning to show beneath their eyes. He had to give 
credit where credit was due. Celeborn was doing his best to make 
amends and was making sure the twins’ tiny bodies were treated with 
the utmost respect. Then, he remembered. Their bodies would be laid 
to rest today. 

He had told Erestor that today was the day of their burial, but so far the 
raven-haired Elf hadn’t reacted to this news. Haldir wasn’t even sure 
Erestor had fully understood what he had been saying. 

“Try again,” said Celeborn softly. “Maybe he wants to attend after all.” 
In his heart he grieved for the twins’ deaths as well. Even if Erestor had 
killed Rhoss – which he now doubted – the dark-haired Elf had paid 
that debt in full. As far as he was concerned, there was no more reason 
to punish Erestor. Although Galadriel didn’t agree with him, he was 
determined to treat Erestor respectfully from this moment on.

Haldir drew in a deep breath and in his softest voice he asked, “Meldir? 
Do you want to attend the funeral? I know you are still weak and 
hurting immensely, but maybe attending the ceremony will give you a 
sense of closure.” He involuntarily held his breath, feeling Erestor stir 
against him. The other Elf had heard him, then. “Do you want to 
attend? We will accompany you. You do not have to do this alone.”

Erestor’s eyelids fluttered, and his large, chocolate eyes fastened on 
Haldir. He had heard every word the silver-haired sentry had said, but 
he hadn’t known what his answer would be until now. Hesitantly, he 
nodded his head once. “W-want… t-to…”

Haldir released the breath he had been holding. “I won’t leave your 
side, mellon. I will be there for you.”

Celeborn exchanged a worried glance with Haldir and then nodded. 
“We will leave within the hour. Make sure he is wrapped up in warm 
blankets.”

Erestor’s empty gaze shifted from Haldir’s face to Celeborn’s. “Thank-
k… you…” Celeborn didn’t have to do this and he was greatly indebted 
to the Lord of the Wood. 

“I will wait for you outside.” Celeborn felt like he was suffocating, 
looking into Erestor’s empty eyes. The dark-haired Elf appeared to have 
finally run out of tears. He quickly fled from the room and inhaled 
deeply once he was out in the open. /Elbereth, what did we do? How 
can I ever make amends to him?/ Making sure that the twins’ remains 
were put to rest with all the respect they deserved was a start.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haldir’s worries increased when Erestor nearly fainted in his arms. He 
had dressed the skinny Elf in warm robes, wrapping thick blankets 
around his shaky form and yet Erestor remained cold to the touch. 
Then he had tried to help Erestor onto his feet, but the grieving Elf had 
swayed dangerously. In the end, Haldir had gently lifted him in his 
arms. Catching Camfael’s gaze, he whispered, “I will be extremely 
careful so his wound won’t reopen.” 

The healer had expressed his displeasure earlier at finding the wound 
growing infected and now constantly fussed over Erestor. Camfael 
nodded, staying close to Haldir and Erestor. He made sure the blankets 
remained in place when the silver-haired sentry carried Erestor down 
the talan. 

Haldir appreciated the fact that Celeborn had ensured that no Elves 
were about to stare at Erestor in his hour of grief. Cradling his charge 
close to his chest, he joined his brothers and Celeborn, who were 
waiting for them. He swallowed hard, seeing Celeborn carry a small 
silk bundle. /The babies are wrapped up in that fabric./ 

In his arms, Erestor twitched, as he too had caught sight of the bundle. 
During these last long hours, Erestor had wondered whether he should 
ask Celeborn to let him see his sons, but in the end he had decided 
against it. The sight of them –dead- would haunt him for the rest of his 
life. He wasn’t ready for that. He buried his right hand in Haldir’s tunic 
and his other in the sentry’s hair. Without Haldir he wouldn’t have 
survived. The sentry kept him sane.

/Sane? Am I still sane? The things that happened to me… All I want is 
to lie down, close my eyes and stop existing./ His fingers twitched and 
curled around the silken strands of Haldir’s hair. He clung to the 
warrior when they made their way to the secluded section of the wood 
where Celeborn had erected a small tomb. His head lolled against 
Haldir’s chest and he was using his last strength to remain conscious 
until the ceremony had been completed.

Celeborn stopped in his tracks, reaching the small, white marble tomb 
that stood beneath an ancient mallorn tree. Before erecting the tomb, 
he had conversed with the ancient tree, which had assured him that it 
would guard the twins’ last resting place. 

“Erestor? We have arrived.” Haldir flinched, when Erestor’s eyes filled 
with tears once more. 

“P-put… me on-n… my… f-feet…” Erestor struggled weakly in 
Haldir’s arms, wanting to be put down. His gaze settled on the 
somberly decorated tomb. In height it reached Celeborn’s waist and a 
beautiful carving adorned it, depicting Nienna, who was weeping bitter 
tears. “Thank-k… you,” he whispered, addressing Celeborn in a shaky 
voice.

Haldir carefully put Erestor on his feet, but kept both arms tightly 
locked around his charge’s waist. He couldn’t take the risk of Erestor 
taking a fall. If the wound reopened, Erestor would lose even more 
blood. 

“Would you like to hold them before we put them to rest?” Celeborn 
had never felt so guilty or ashamed of himself in all of his millennia 
long existence. His actions had caused the twins’ deaths, and thus 
Erestor’s loss. 

Erestor’s large, dark, swimming eyes met Celeborn’s and he slowly 
opened his arms. His emotions made it impossible for him to speak and 
he hoped the Lord of the Golden Wood understood. And again, he 
wondered; should he look upon them? But no, he was not strong 
enough for that.

Seeing Erestor sway on his feet, Celeborn came to a standstill at the 
raven-haired Elf’s side and then placed the small bundle against the 
dark-haired Elf’s chest. He supported Erestor’s arms when they didn’t 
seem strong enough to hold the twins’ remains. 

“I… I am-m s-sor… ry…” whispered Erestor in a stricken tone. “L-
loved you…” He pressed them gently against his chest, sobbing 
heartbrokenly. 

Haldir’s eyes now also released fat tears, sensing Erestor’s loss almost as 
if it were his own. And when he looked at Celeborn, he found that 
even the Lord of the Golden Wood was weeping openly. 
	
They stood in silence, allowing Erestor to say his private goodbyes to 
the little ones, which he had carried for nearly nine months. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor felt numb when Celeborn reached for his sons. Briefly he 
considered putting up a struggle as he didn’t want to part with them 
yet, but the little sanity he had left stopped him. 

Celeborn gathered the bundle in his arms again and wished he had the 
power to turn back time and change his past decisions. “Erestor…” 

Erestor, leaning heavily against Haldir, nodded shakily. The twins 
should be put to rest. 

Celeborn carefully placed the bundle inside the marble tomb. Before 
sealing the tomb, he looked into Erestor’s swimming eyes and felt the 
need to offer some sort of comfort. But words seemed hollow and 
hypocritical. What could he possibly say that would soothe Erestor? 
His voice was soft and caring when he took a step away from the tomb, 
and gathered one of Erestor’s trembling hands in his.

“Nienna, Mistress of Sorrow, 
who grieves and knows our pain,  
Listen to our plea in this hour of our loss and sadness.

A very part of life itself has died 
with these two children. 
Our souls are weighed down with sorrow 
and Erestor bears the wound of a lifelong scar. 
Comfort him for his pain is heavy and deep.

Nienna, Mistress of Sorrow,
you know our pain at the loss of these children 
who have been taken away from us. 
 

We would have held them in the embrace of love,
protected and loved them, but it was not meant to be. 
 

Nienna, wrap them in your gentle love 
as we attempt to carry this bitter burden.

May you, Mistress of Sorrow and Pain, 
hold them close to your heart forever.”

Celeborn’s usually melodic voice shattered, speaking that last word. It 
wasn’t clear whether he had finished or simply lacked the strength to 
carry on and silence descended heavily upon them.

And so did cold rain. The sky opened and the dark clouds wept tears of 
their own. Had Nienna heard their plea and was this her way of 
showing her grief? Haldir wasn’t sure, but he did know that he had to 
get Erestor out of the rain. In his current weakened condition, 
developing complications would endanger the Elf’s recovery. “Erestor? 
I need to take you back inside where it is warm.”

Erestor barely heard Haldir. Celeborn’s words whispered through his 
mind. Heal… He didn’t want to heal. He didn’t want Nienna’s comfort. 
He needed to feel his pain, the eternal guilt of knowing he had killed 
his babies. He should have been stronger, should have told Seregon no, 
but he hadn’t. 

Shaking like a leaf, he rested his head against Haldir’s shoulder. His 
gaze was still fastened on the tomb that now held the remains of his 
sons. /I wanted to hold them… Rock them… Sing to them./ But his 
arms were empty and his sons’ remains were nestled inside a cold, 
marble tomb instead. Unable to bear this immense loss, he fainted in 
Haldir’s arms. 

The silver-haired Elf had expected as much and already had a tight 
hold on his charge. He carefully lifted Erestor in his arms and nodded, 
thankfully, seeing Rumil was covering Erestor with a blanket. “We 
need to leave… Now.”

They hurried through the woods, back to the healers’ talan and when 
they finally stepped inside Erestor’s rooms, Haldir and Camfael quickly 
removed Erestor’s soaked robes. Rumil fed more wood to the 
weakening fire and Orophin hurried toward the kitchens to acquire 
warm, herbal tea.

Celeborn remained standing in the doorway, shuffling his feet. He felt 
redundant, but didn’t want to leave. He hoped he could help in some 
way. 

Camfael and Haldir rubbed Erestor’s skin until it was dry and then 
placed him in the center of the bed, quickly covering him with 
blankets. Haldir startled, seeing Erestor’s eyes had closed. “Camfael?”

“Erestor might still fade. I honestly do not know if his fëa will stay or 
depart.”

“I thought we had won this battle,” said Haldir in a distressed tone.

Celeborn flinched. “Haldir, this battle has only just begun.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They took turns sitting with Erestor, occasionally forcing the smallest 
amounts of water down the Elf’s throat. 

It was Celeborn’s turn now to sit with their charge and within minutes 
he found himself gently stroking Erestor’s brow. /I regret not opposing 
Galadriel. If I had, you would not be in this predicament./ After 
dipping his fingers in a glass of water, he rubbed them against Erestor’s 
lips. A few droplets of the precious moisture made it past his charge’s 
lips and Celeborn sighed dejectedly. 

It was becoming clear that Erestor had cut himself off from the outside 
world. The dark-haired Elf had buried himself inside his mind after the 
funeral and now refused to return to them. He had seen this happen 
once before and it had taken the Elf who had slipped under a thousand 
years to return to them. 

“I understand you are grieving, but this is not the right way. By 
shutting us out, you are making everything worse. Let us comfort you.”

But Erestor ignored him and Celeborn’s heart grew heavy with 
foreboding. How many years would it take Erestor to find his way back 
to them? That was provided Erestor would return to them eventually. 
The raven-haired Elf could stay in this state until the end of Arda. 

“By the Grace of the Valar, what shall I do?” It would have been more 
appropriate to ask what *could* he do?

“Nothing, now,” whispered his guilty conscience.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haldir lost the little hope he’d had, realizing Erestor was lost to them. 
The normally expressive eyes remained closed, the dark-haired Elf’s 
body motionless and Haldir reckoned that Erestor only stayed alive 
because of his bond with Elrond. He had no idea what was going on in 
Erestor’s head; why the Elf had chosen to stay in this catatonic state, 
but after several moons had waxed and waned, he realized that he 
didn’t have the power to change anything. Erestor remained 
unreachable and only the few droplets that occasionally made it past 
his lips kept him alive.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Months became years and years changed into decades. Centuries passed 
by and turned into two millennia and yet Erestor remained lost to 
them. 

Haldir still visited with Erestor and so did his brothers. They would sit 
with him, touch him, caress his hair and try to bring him out of his 
vegetative state, but Erestor never reacted to their presence. The dark-
haired Elf had become skeleton-like. His bones stuck out of his skin; his 
features were sunken and his body seemed frozen in time. 

Camfael had taken it upon himself to put Erestor through a daily 
regime of physical exercises and often the other healers had seen him 
wipe away his tears when leaving Erestor’s room.

Celeborn tried to reason with Galadriel, but she no longer had an 
interest in Erestor. All that mattered to her was that Erestor remained 
alive and aided Elrond.

Elrond… Haldir had seen the half-Elf when Elrond had visited 
Lothlorien. He had seen the charmed expression when Galadriel had 
introduced Celebrian to the Peredhel and he had seen his wife’s 
scheming in order to bring Elrond and Celebrian together. He had 
grown very worried, and had even opposed his wife, but Galadriel had 
not given in and before he knew what was happening, Elrond and 
Celebrian were engaged and soon to be married. When their 
engagement had been announced, Celeborn and Haldir had retired to 
Erestor’s room to sit with the unconscious Elf in a silent protest. 

“My Lord, ‘tis not right. Elrond and Erestor belong together.” 
Throughout the last millennia Haldir had learned that Celeborn often 
disagreed with his wife, but the Lord of the Golden Wood was hesitant 
to openly protest Galadriel’s decisions. 

“You are right,” said Celeborn, sighing heavily. Erestor was tucked 
away beneath a warm blanket and could have passed for a corpse, had 
he not known better. “I have made mistake upon mistake. My first 
mistake was to agree to Erestor binding himself to Elrond in that way. 
The bond should have been mutual and Erestor should have been 
Elrond’s rightful mate.”

Haldir, who was rubbing Erestor’s boney fingers, swallowed hard. 

“And when he suffered that miscarriage, I should have contacted 
Elrond to tell him. But I made another mistake and kept this from the 
Peredhel, condemning Erestor to this half-life.” Celeborn blamed 
himself for Erestor’s terrible fate. “And now it is too late to tell Elrond 
the truth. They are to be wed tomorrow.”

Haldir gently squeezed Erestor’s hand. Even after two thousand years, 
he still hoped to provoke some sort of reaction on Erestor’s part. “’Tis 
not fair,” he said, and was reminded of words he had spoken after 
Erestor had lost the twins. “Look at him.”

Celeborn did and nearly choked on the fierce emotions running 
through him. “There are times when I wish that Mandos would take 
pity on him and call him to the Great Halls of Waiting.”

“But Galadriel would not like that.”

Celeborn met Haldir’s gaze. “Elrond Half-Elven is strong again. He 
dealt with the loss of his lover and his twin, and found new love with 
Celebrian. I saw them together. Galadriel’s scheming might have 
brought this about, but at least there is love involved. Elrond and 
Celebrian are happy.”

“But Erestor is not.” Haldir drew in a deep breath. “I would give my 
own life to bring him back.”

“Erestor would not want that,” said Celeborn, knowing Erestor would 
not want Haldir to make such a sacrifice. “And you cannot, at any rate. 
Erestor is still bound to Elrond.”

“Then stop this wedding!”

“That I cannot do. I love my daughter and want to see her happy. I am 
torn, Haldir!” Celeborn hoped Haldir would understand, but then he 
saw the anger in the sentry’s hazel eyes. “My hands are tied.”

“And so Erestor continues to suffer.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haldir stood in the back of the crowd, hearing Galadriel bind Elrond 
and Celebrìan in a sacred marriage. His heart and thoughts were with 
Erestor, however. His last hope that Elrond and Erestor would one day 
be reunited had now been crushed. Looking at Galadriel, he saw 
intense pleasure and contentment in her eyes. Celeborn, who stood 
beside her seemed happy as well, but Haldir’s well-trained eye caught 
the sadness in his Lord’s orbs. 

His gaze shifted from Celeborn’s face to Elrond’s and Haldir’s stomach 
contracted, seeing the happiness on the half-Elf’s face. /You have no 
idea at how high a price that happiness comes. Only a few telain away 
from here, Erestor continues to fade and you are the only one who 
could have brought him back./

But he couldn’t really blame Elrond. The half-Elf had no idea Galadriel 
had manipulated him. /Celebrian and Elrond will be happy. And 
judging by that kiss they already are. The Valar will grace them with 
children and Elrond will never know about the two sons he lost./

Unable to stay any longer, he excused himself and left to sit with 
Erestor. The dark-haired Elf didn’t deserve to be alone in this hour.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rumil had joined Haldir and was now watching the activity in the 
courtyard. His eyes, searching the space below, narrowed, seeing 
Elrond lift Celebrian into the saddle. They were smiling adoringly at 
each other and the half-Elf’s hand tenderly rested on her thigh. “They 
are leaving, Haldir.”

“I do not care, Muindor,” said Haldir, who was forced to stop reading to 
Erestor to talk to Rumil. “For all I care a Balrog can devour the 
Peredhel.”

Rumil sighed and watched the Imladris party leave. Once they had 
disappeared from view, he turned around and sat down on the side of 
Erestor’s bed. It had become second nature to all three brothers to hold 
the dark-haired Elf’s hand and stroke his hair, which was still combed 
and neatly braided each day. One of them made sure Erestor was 
always presentable. 

“Orophin will return from his patrol today. When do you leave?” asked 
Haldir, trying to locate the passage he had been reading to Erestor. 

“At the crack of dawn.” Rumil picked up the cup of tea he had brought 
earlier and sipped from it. They had long given up on making Erestor 
drink some water. Instead, each morning one of them would stop by to 
wet the raven-haired Elf’s lips with a few droplets. 

“I will stay with Erestor tonight. Celeborn will sit with him in the 
morning.” Haldir had finally found the right passage and was about to 
start reading again when Rumil spoke before he could begin. 

“Do you think he will ever return to us? Or will he stay like this until 
the end of Arda?” Rumil’s eyes were filled with compassion, looking at 
Erestor’s fragile form. 

“I have to believe he will wake up one day,” said Haldir in a 
determined tone. “Once he has mourned his sons’ deaths he will return 
to us. What is two thousand years to one of us, Rumil? I am convinced 
Erestor is still in there and that he will come back to us.” /To me./ 

Haldir had long denied this to himself, but his feelings for Erestor had 
deepened. He wasn’t sure if he could call it love. There wasn’t any 
passion, any lust. Instead, a deep sense of caring love had settled in his 
heart. /I want to see him healed one day, and I will be there for him 
when he finally wakes up!/

Haldir’s face was an open book to Rumil, who shared his brother’s hope 
that Erestor would eventually find the strength to overcome his loss. 
But unlike his brother, he was afraid that day would never come.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was Orophin’s turn to give Erestor a sponge bath, wash his hair, 
comb and braid it.  His touches were light and comforting whilst he 
took care of his charge. He had lost count of the many times he had 
done this for the healer who had saved his life nearly three thousand 
years ago, and yet he still made sure he treated Erestor with the 
greatest possible care.

“I am not sure you want to know this, but Elrond and Celebrian are 
now the proud parents of a daughter. They called her Arwen.” During 
the millennia he had grown used to talking to Erestor like the raven-
haired Elf was still awake, and at times he told Erestor about Elrond 
and his children. “They called for a celebration. I know it is of little 
comfort to you, but Elrond is happy. Your sacrifice served a noble 
purpose, meldir. I just wish it had been you who had found bliss in 
Elrond’s arms.”

He had maneuvered Erestor into a sitting position to braid the long, 
dark hair, and now that he had finished his job, he slowly eased Erestor 
back onto his side again. “Haldir will return tomorrow from his patrol. 
I am sure he will be eager to tell you about everything that happened to 
him.”

Orophin was about to smooth back a stray lock, when his hand froze in 
mid-air. 

Erestor had finally opened his eyes and was now looking at him.

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine.

Heart in Chains.
Part 12.



Haldir frantically bounded up the steps of the talan, leaping up several 
stairs at a time. Upon his return, Orophin had told him that Erestor had 
finally regained awareness and he was now eager to convince himself 
that the raven-haired Elf had really returned to them.

Storming into the room, his eyes immediately searched Erestor’s 
features. His heart missed a beat, seeing the large eyes open and 
blinking. “You returned to us!” He ignored Camfael and Celeborn, who 
were talking softly in the corner of the room and sat down on the side 
of Erestor’s bed. “I always knew you would come back to us!” Haldir 
took hold of Erestor’s right hand and soothingly rubbed the knuckles.

When he didn’t get a reply, Haldir’s eyes widened questioningly. 
Erestor was looking at him and the thin, nearly bloodless lips were 
moving, but the dark-haired Elf wasn’t speaking with him. “Meldir?” 
Worried, he searched Erestor’s eyes. 

“He woke up a few hours ago,” said Camfael, who came to a standstill 
behind the march warden. “He has been asleep for a very long time and 
his body needs to adjust. I fear that he will have to relearn everything; 
speech, eating, walking… Everything.”

Camfael’s words dampened Haldir’s enthusiasm. “Are you telling me he 
is like a newborn?”

“Aye,” said Celeborn. “And we need to take care of him for a while. But 
I am confident that he will grow strong again.”

Haldir’s nostrils twitched, smelling urine. “What?”

“Erestor has no control over his bodily functions yet,” explained 
Camfael. “We need to clean him up.”

“I will do it,” said Haldir determinedly. 

“Excellent. In that case you can also give him a sponge bath. He needs 
to get used to being touched again.” Camfael pushed back the damp 
sheet and with Haldir’s assistance moved Erestor to the bathroom, 
where he left the two Elves alone. He knew from previous experience 
that Erestor liked it best when he was alone with Haldir.

Celeborn worriedly looked at Camfael. “Galadriel probably already 
knows.”

Camfael nodded. “Will you be Erestor’s champion or will you abide 
solely by your wife’s decisions, my Lord?” He knew he was being bold, 
but Celeborn had to take a stand in this.

“I will be his champion, even if it means defying Galadriel.” During 
these last millennia his wife had changed, and at times he barely 
recognized the woman he had once loved so dearly. “I do not 
understand when things went wrong.”

“Neither do I,” said Camfael, resting a hand on his Lord’s shoulder. “But 
I do know that you need to be strong for Erestor’s sake.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haldir’s heart bled, seeing the lost expression in Erestor’s eyes when he 
removed the other Elf’s nightshirt. He could tell that Erestor felt 
embarrassed for not being able to control himself and quickly cleaned 
his charge. Methodically, he washed Erestor’s shivering body and then 
wrapped him up in a large, fluffy towel. 

Now that Erestor was sitting down again, clean and warm, he lowered 
himself onto one knee and gathered the other’s clammy hands in his. 
“Erestor? Mellon-nîn, for so many years I hoped you would return to us 
and now you have. I knew you would not desert me!” Erestor’s 
pleading eyes made him enfold the trembling Elf in his arms. “I have 
already requested to be relieved from my duties and Lord Celeborn has 
given me his permission. I won’t leave your side for the next few 
weeks.”

Hearing Haldir’s words and determined, caring tone, Erestor managed 
to rest his head on the silver-haired Elf’s shoulder. It was Haldir who 
had made him come back. Often he had tried to step into the Halls of 
Waiting, but Haldir’s voice had always called him back. The sentry 
wasn’t ready yet to let him go and in the end, Erestor had given in. 
Now that he rested in Haldir’s arms, he felt safe. It was the strangest 
sensation. In the back of his mind he still sensed Elrond’s presence, but 
the half-Elf was happy and not drawing any strength away from him. 

“I sat with you for so many hours, Erestor, but I never stopped 
believing you would come back to me.” Haldir lifted his eyes and stared 
into large, chocolate eyes. “So many things have happened, have 
changed since you… left. There is so much I need to tell you.”

Erestor hoped Haldir would ration his information. It felt like his brain 
was only capable of dealing with tiny morsels of information. Haldir’s 
arms tightened around him and he loved the way it made him feel - 
safe. 

“You should return our patient to his bed,” said Camfael, who now 
stood in the doorway. “Erestor is still very weak and needs rest.”

Haldir was unwilling to part from his charge and gently lifted Erestor 
in his arms. Entering the bedroom, he nodded thankfully at Celeborn. 
The fact that his Lord had given him permission to take care of Erestor 
meant that Celeborn had chosen Erestor’s side after all. He gently 
placed Erestor in the center of the bed now that Camfael and Celeborn 
had changed the bed linens. “Camfael is right, you know. You need to 
rest.”

“But first he needs to eat and drink something.” Celeborn had accepted 
the tray one of the servants had brought and placed it on the 
nightstand. He immediately noticed the stricken expression in Erestor’s 
eyes, understanding. “We will take you to the bathroom in time. You 
won’t have another accident.”

Erestor sighed deeply. He was trying to move his hands, but his fingers 
refused to cooperate. Feeling utterly helpless, he wondered how he was 
ever going to manage. 

“Let me help.” Haldir first pulled Erestor against him and then curled 
his fingers around the cup, helping his charge sip the tepid, herbal tea. 
“How does it taste?” His heart fluttered, pleased, when Erestor released 
a soft moan of approval. “It does not matter how long this will take, 
you will recover.”

Erestor wished he shared Haldir’s faith in him, but he didn’t.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Try again and take all the time you need.” Haldir’s heart ached, seeing 
the self-loathing in Erestor’s eyes. “You can do it.” Erestor was trying to 
take hold of a piece of bread but his fingers were too stiff and unused to 
functioning at all to curl around it. “Do not push yourself.” Haldir 
wished there was something else, something more he could do to help, 
but Erestor needed time to recover. 

Releasing a frustrated growl, Erestor gave up. His hand, which had 
been poised in mid-air, fell back onto the bed. “Can…not…” He had 
woken up four weeks ago and during this time Haldir hadn’t left his 
side. The silver-haired Elf looked tired and depressed and he felt sad, 
knowing he was the reason Haldir was in this way. “Go… r-rest…” 
Camfael had practiced speaking with him, but his words were still slow 
and slurred. He felt like he would never recover.

“Erestor, remember what Camfael said. It will take you one year at least 
to fully recover.” Haldir knew he couldn’t remain at Erestor’s side for a 
whole year, but he hoped that Camfael, Rumil, Orophin and Celeborn 
would look after Erestor during the times when he was gone. “Try 
again, please.” Haldir folded his fingers around Erestor’s hand and 
gently supported the limb when his charge reached for the bread. A 
brilliant smile was born on his face when Erestor’s fingers curled 
around the morsel of bread. “See, I told you that you could do it.”

Erestor couldn’t help it. Tears slid from his eyes and he dropped the 
morsel, grabbing Haldir’s fingers instead. He wanted to thank Haldir 
for his continued support, but the words wouldn’t come to him. His 
thoughts were chaotic and at times he even forgot his friends’ names. 
But they always reminded him in a kind voice. So far, he had managed 
to push away the memories of his sons’ funeral. A mere thought of 
them was enough to pull him under again and, after millennia of cold 
loneliness, he didn’t want to give up on Haldir’s company. It was 
amazing; Haldir had become the most important person in his life. 

Haldir in turn wondered about the strange expression in Erestor’s eyes. 
“What is it?” He gently squeezed the powerless fingers in an effort to 
comfort Erestor.

“Out…s-side…” Erestor had no idea if Haldir understood what he was 
trying to say, but he had to try. His greatest desire was to go outside 
and sit under an ancient tree whilst watching Arien’s rays play hide 
and seek with the wind and the leaves. Would Haldir understand?

Erestor’s big, needy eyes told Haldir everything he needed to know. 
“Let me fetch you a warm cloak.” Seeing Erestor’s relief, he gently 
stroked the long, raven hair. “I know a charming spot near the lake, 
which is normally deserted at this time of the day.”

Erestor managed a weak nod and his eyes followed Haldir through the 
room when the silver-haired Elf gathered a warm riding-cloak from a 
chair. It was probably Haldir’s, Erestor realized. He sighed approvingly 
as Haldir wrapped the warm fabric around him. Aye, it was Haldir’s all 
right. The cloak exuded the sentry’s pleasant scent. 

“You are welcome,” whispered Haldir, reading gratitude in Erestor’s 
eyes. The dark-haired Elf groaned in protest when Haldir pushed his 
arms beneath him. “You are still too weak to walk. Let me carry you.” 
He hoped Erestor would let him. “I like doing these things for you.”

Erestor studied Haldir and wondered what was really prompting the 
march warden’s actions. /Is it because he still feels indebted to me? Do I 
really want to know? I am fortunate to have such a friend./ Haldir 
lifted him and Erestor succeeded in partly moving his arm around the 
sentry’s neck. The warm smile that Haldir gave him took him aback. 
No one had ever looked at him like that. And for some reason he was 
reminded of something Eärendil had once said; that it was time for him 
to find a mate. /Aiya, Elbereth, do not let Haldir fall in love with me. I 
am not worthy of him and… I am already bound to Elrond Half-Elven. 
I would make Haldir unhappy./ 

Haldir sensed some of Erestor’s thoughts and quickly hid the love he 
felt. But at the same time, he realized he would have to tell Erestor 
shortly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hap…p-py,” mumbled Erestor blissfully. Haldir had put him down 
beneath the sheltering leaves of an ancient mallorn tree and the silver-
haired sentry had then maneuvered him closer. His head now rested on 
Haldir’s thigh and the march warden’s fingers gently moved through 
his hair. He purred his contentment, which made Haldir laugh.

“Ah, Erestor, I have seldom seen you this relaxed.” And with that 
realization came regret. “I talked to Lord Celeborn and he will try to 
make your life more enjoyable from now on.”

/Enjoyable? How can I possibly enjoy life when… when my babies are 
dead?/ But he quickly pushed that thought away. /Nay, not now./ He 
didn’t want to think about his guilt, his weakness and cowardice. But 
was he entitled to feel this happy? His babies were dead whilst he was 
still alive. Tears built in his eyes and, as he was unable to wipe them 
away, he turned his face away from Haldir instead. If only his body 
would start cooperating! 

“Do not cry, Erestor. Please do not cry.” Acting instinctively, Haldir 
leaned in closer and pressed a chaste kiss on Erestor’s clammy brow. 
“Do not cry. You have already shed too many tears.”

Feeling Haldir’s lips pressed against his brow made Erestor’s eyes 
widen. Had the sentry just kissed him? Why?

Haldir had the grace to blush. “I… I hope I did not cross the line by 
doing that. But you looked so lost.”

“W-why?” Why had Haldir kissed him? Had it been pity?

“I…” Haldir hesitated, cleared his throat and then took heart. “I have 
feelings for you. I am not sure what their nature is, but I care deeply for 
you.” The shock that radiated from Erestor’s eyes made his heart miss a 
beat. “I know you are bound to Elrond and that you cannot accept me 
as your lover, but I would still offer you my love.”

Erestor slowly shook his head. “N-nay… You… un…h-happy.” 
Accepting Haldir’s offer would make the sentry miserable in the end. 
He couldn’t do that! No matter how much he longed to be enfolded in 
the warmth Haldir radiated. He wasn’t even sure if the bond would 
allow Haldir to touch him intimately. 

Haldir gazed into Erestor’s sad eyes. “I would also be unhappy if you 
rejected me. Erestor, I do not know how far we can go, but I want you 
to know that you have a true and dedicated friend.”

Erestor’s eyes swam with unshed tears and Haldir bent forward again, 
placing butterfly kisses on his eyelids. The raven-haired Elf trembled 
beneath him, and when he pulled back to make eye contact, he found 
that Erestor had fainted.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Erestor? What happened to make you faint? Erestor?” 

With difficultly, Erestor identified Camfael’s voice. “Hal… dir?” His 
memories came rushing back to him. Haldir had kissed him! Panicking, 
he tried to elbow himself into an upright position, but the healer’s hand 
settled on his chest and it worried him how little strength Camfael used 
in order to make him lie down again. “Where… is… Haldir?” He 
quickly scanned the room in search of the silver-haired sentry.

“Haldir brought you here an hour ago. I berated him for taking you 
outside whilst you are still recovering.”

“Where… is… he… now?” Driven by panic and the fear of losing 
Haldir, his stutter lessened. He tried to grab hold of Camfael’s hands, 
but failed. 

“I sent him to his talan to rest. He looked tired and worried.” Camfael 
stroked his patient’s sweaty brow. “You need to rest as well, Erestor. 
Going outside was taxing. What did he think he was doing?”

“I… asked him… to take me… outside,” whispered Erestor with his last 
strength. “Not… his fault.” His eyes became vacant, and he slipped into 
a healing sleep. 

Camfael made eye contact with Celeborn, who stood next to the 
window and out of Erestor’s sight. “They are becoming attached to each 
other.”

“Is that a good thing?” asked Celeborn thoughtfully. Studying Erestor, 
he realized it would take months for the raven-haired Elf to recover 
from his ordeal. The hardest test would come when Erestor visited his 
sons’ tombs. 

“Aye, I think it is.” Camfael leaned back into the comfort of the chair. 
“As Erestor’s mate shows no interest in him, I am beginning to think 
that it would be best if Erestor sought comfort in someone else’s arms. 
Haldir is a compassionate soul and he seems right for Erestor.”

“Erestor’s mate…” Celeborn fought his inner demons, sighed, and then 
continued, “Erestor’s mate does not know about the bond. We never 
told him.”

Camfael’s eyes flared with anger. “What?”

“Erestor formed a healing bond to pull him back from the Great Halls 
of Waiting. But as this Elf was traumatized, Galadriel and I decided not 
to burden his soul with a bond.”

“You did what?” Camfael rose from his chair and glared at his Lord. 
“This Elf did not bind himself to Erestor in turn?”

“Nay,” said Celeborn, his features contorting. “And he is now happily 
married and father of three lovely children.”

Camfael’s voice grew colder than the ice at the peak of Cradhras when 
he spoke next. “And I assume you never told him Erestor lost their 
children.”

“That would only have added to the trauma.” Celeborn cringed at the 
way that sounded. 

“And Erestor has not been traumatized?” Camfael’s hands changed into 
fists now that the normally peaceful healer was losing his temper. “I 
suggest you leave now. Haldir and I will look after Erestor.”

Celeborn nodded, resigned. “If it is any consolation to you, I never 
wanted it to turn out like this. I always hoped Erestor and the Elf he is 
bound to would reunite one day.”

“There is little hope of that now.” Camfael walked over to the doorway, 
opened the door and bid Celeborn to leave.

Heavily burdened by guilt, Celeborn complied.

Camfael returned to Erestor’s side with more understanding of the Elf’s 
tragic life. “They played and manipulated you, Erestor. It is a shame. I 
do think Haldir would have made you happy.” But Erestor was no 
longer free to bond with Haldir. “I wish things had gone differently, 
Erestor. You deserve someone who makes you happy.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Rumil, let him sleep.” Orophin had dressed himself and was now 
preparing to join his fellows on today’s patrol. “Haldir has attended to 
Erestor these past few weeks and needs his rest.”

“But he will be cross with us if he wakes up and finds no one is sitting 
with Erestor.”

“Camfael is attending to Erestor,” replied Orophin, who now reached 
for his bow. “If it were up to me, I would stay as well, but it is my turn 
to lead today’s patrol. I won’t be back until tomorrow evening.”

“Then I will sit with Erestor,” said Rumil in a determined tone. 
“Orophin?” He glanced at his brother with questioning eyes. “Have you 
noticed the way Haldir --”

“Looks at Erestor?” finished Orophin for him. The silver-haired Elf 
sighed worriedly. “Only heartache can come from this.”

“Do you think we should stop Haldir from –”

Orophin cut his brother short. “Nay, Haldir is old enough to make his 
own decisions. But we will be there for him when things fall apart.”

“You expect things to go badly?” Rumil didn’t like the sound of that.

Orophin looked deeply into his brother’s eyes. “As long as our Lady 
continues her scheming, Erestor will get hurt. And now, Haldir will get 
hurt as well.” He didn’t want to ponder this in depth. “I suggest you 
write Haldir a note and then leave to sit with Erestor.” He waved his 
good-bye to Rumil and then hurried to meet up with his fellows.

Rumil did as Orophin had suggested and was sitting at Erestor’s bedside 
within the hour. The dark-haired Elf was still asleep, but what worried 
him was the way Erestor’s fingers clawed at the sheet. This was not a 
healing sleep.

When Erestor woke an hour later, his eyes immediately searched for 
Haldir. At first he rejoiced seeing a silver-haired Elf sitting next to the 
bed, but his mood darkened upon realizing it was Rumil. /Does Haldir 
no longer want to see me? Does he regret kissing me?/ Awkwardly 
moving about on the bed, he managed to draw Rumil’s attention. 
“Hal…dir?” He had to know the truth, no matter how hard or painful.

“Haldir is asleep,” said Rumil soothingly. “He was exhausted.”

That didn’t quite reassure Erestor, but he couldn’t tell Rumil what 
really worried him. He had to endure this uncertainty.

“Camfael told me to make sure you exercised today,” said Rumil, trying 
to distract Erestor. “Why don’t we start with your daily exercises and 
then go for a short walk?”

Erestor nodded, resigning himself to his fate. He hated being subjected 
to these exercises, but knew they were the reason he was still able to 
move after millennia of catatonia.

Rumil pushed back the sheet and began to massage Erestor’s feet. 
Camfael, he and his brothers had done this so many times that it had 
become second nature to them. He manipulated arms and legs, 
occasionally asking Erestor to push back against him or lift his limbs. 
“This is getting easier for you,” said Rumil pleased. Hopefully Erestor 
would be able to walk again unaided in a few weeks. 

“Does… not hurt… that much… any longer.” The first time Camfael 
had put him through this – after he had woken up – he had cried bitter 
tears of pain when his tense muscles had protested.

“Excellent,” said Rumil in a pleased tone. “And now how about a trip to 
the bathroom? I will support you, but you have to walk the distance.” 

Erestor sighed, knowing Rumil was doing this because it was in his best 
interest. “Aye.” He allowed the silver-haired Elf to fold his arms around 
his waist and then, aided by Rumil, he pushed himself slowly onto his 
feet. Camfael had told him that he was making excellent progress, but 
Erestor wished it would go faster. He didn’t like being this helpless.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“And now we will eat breakfast,” announced Rumil, glad that their trip 
to the bathroom was over. Even after assisting Erestor several times, he 
still felt awkward when helping the dark-haired Elf relieve himself. 
And he could tell by the expression on his charge’s face that Erestor 
hated it as well.

Erestor resigned himself to more torture, trying to feed himself with 
uncertain and staggering movements. His fingers were beginning to 
cooperate, but coordinating the movement to his mouth still proved 
difficult. He managed a few bites and then sighed, fatigued. “I will… 
never… learn…”

“That is not true!” Rumil firmly shook his head. “Look at the progress 
you have made in just a few weeks! When you woke you could not 
speak and now your stutter is nearly gone!”

Erestor gave Rumil a hesitant smile. “Could not… have done it… 
without… all of you…” They had to grow tired of him eventually, but 
in the meantime he would soak up their attention. 

Rumil smiled broadly. “That is what we have been trying to tell you all 
along, mellon. We are all here for you.” He just hoped the Lady 
Galadriel would leave Erestor alone from now on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Sleepy head? Wake up for me.” Haldir had relieved Rumil and now 
took his place at Erestor’s side. Studying the pale face, he realized 
Erestor needed more fresh air. But first they needed to address his kiss. 
Erestor’s reaction to it still baffled him. /Why did he faint?/ As Erestor 
didn’t stir, he tried again. “Erestor? Wake up.”

Haldir’s voice finally reached Erestor and his eyes filled with 
awareness. Finding Haldir at his side instantly reassured him, but then 
the memory of the kiss returned and he had to know why. Whilst 
pushing himself into a sitting position, he whispered, “Why?”

Haldir swallowed hard in understanding. “It felt right.” He sat down on 
the side of the bed and gathered Erestor’s hand in his. “It seems so 
unfair that you have to suffer in this way when Elrond is happily 
married. You are entitled to a loving touch as well.”

A lump of emotion formed in Erestor’s throat. “You will… end up… 
hurt. I cannot… bind myself… to you.” He didn’t want to see Haldir 
hurt because of him. 

“I know that, lirimaer, and I wish things were different. I still hope 
Elrond will find out one day and thank you for everything you have 
done. I hope the two of you will get together, because then you will 
feel whole again. But in the meantime, let me try to make you happy.”

Erestor released a strangled whimper. Haldir was selflessly offering 
himself to him. It was an offer he should refuse, but could he? He 
yearned for a tender touch, a caring embrace, a soft voice telling him 
someone loved him. After being alone for so long, he found he couldn’t 
go on in that manner any longer. His greatest fear was hurting Haldir at 
some point, but he also realized the sentry made his own decisions and 
was going into this with his eyes wide open. 

“No one knows what will happen in the future,” said Haldir, making 
one last effort to convince Erestor to accept his proposal. “But we can 
make the time we have left much more pleasurable. I give myself 
freely, Erestor. And should there ever come a time that I have to let 
you go, I will be able to do so because I care so deeply for you.”

Erestor’s eyes filled with tears and fastened on Haldir’s. “Aye…” he 
whispered eventually. He didn’t really know what he was saying yes to. 
All he knew was that he couldn’t stand being alone any longer.

When Haldir leaned in closer to gather him in his arms and press a 
gentle kiss upon his lips, he accepted the intimacy and clung to the 
silver-haired Elf as a drowning man to a floating log.

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine.

Heart in Chains
Part 13


“Are you comfortable like this?” Haldir, holding Erestor in his arms, 
pressed deeper into the comfort of the mattress. Camfael had seemed 
stunned, finding him in bed with Erestor, but hadn’t ordered him to 
leave. So Haldir felt it was safe to assume that the healer approved. 

“I am com…fortable…” whispered Erestor in a sleepy tone. He had 
seldom felt more at ease. Haldir had curled himself around him and was 
holding him tightly. His head rested against the sentry’s chest and he 
had wrapped his arms around Haldir. The gentle touches bestowed 
onto his hair made him relax and his heart fluttered madly whenever 
Haldir pressed a chaste kiss on a strand of his hair. “’Tis nice.”

“Aye, ‘tis,” Haldir listened to Erestor softly purr his contentment. “You 
feel so right in my arms.”

Erestor was grateful Haldir couldn’t see his blush. This was all so new 
and unexpected. Just when he had resigned himself to a life without 
love, Haldir had changed everything. 

“Would you look at me, lirimaer? I have the distinct suspicion you are 
blushing.” Haldir enjoyed teasing Erestor somewhat. 

Erestor was biting his bottom lip when he finally lifted his eyes to meet 
Haldir’s. “I *am* blushing.”

“I can see that.” Haldir laughed warmly, but then sobered again. “May I 
kiss you?”

“You did not bother… to ask permission… that first time…” Erestor 
was surprised he was teasing Haldir in turn. What was it about the 
sentry that made him feel like he could lower all the walls he had ever 
erected? It was trust, he decided in the end. He trusted Haldir 
unconditionally. 

“In that case…” Haldir had already read the answer in Erestor’s eyes 
and leaned in closer to carefully claim the other’s lips. He had been 
afraid that Erestor would tense upon contact, but the dark-haired Elf 
remained relaxed. Letting his tongue trail along the insides of Erestor’s 
lips, his eyes beamed with joy when the raven-haired Elf eagerly 
accepted the kiss. 

Erestor’s toes were curling, and he released a pleased moan, feeling 
Haldir’s tongue dance against the insides of his lips. He had no idea 
what he was supposed to do and was contented to let Haldir take the 
lead. The kiss felt warm and caring and caused a tingling sensation 
throughout his body. “Oh…”

Hearing that little sound pleased Haldir tremendously. “That is only the 
beginning, lirimaer.”

Erestor swallowed nervously. “Haldir, I…” Embarrassed, he wondered 
how to tell Haldir how inexperienced he was.

“Elrond was your first…” whispered Haldir knowingly. 

“Aye.” Erestor averted his gaze in shame. “I do not know what… 
how…”

“Do not worry about that, lirimaer,” said Haldir soothingly. “We won’t 
rush this and we will take one step at a time.” He had seen the state 
Elrond had left Erestor in after the binding and realized a lot of pain, 
hurt and fear lingered in the other Elf’s mind. “I will be gentle with 
you, always.”

Haldir’s promise reassured Erestor and he rested his head against the 
silver-haired Elf’s chest once more. “I am tired,” he whispered honestly. 

“Then go to sleep. Tomorrow is a new day and from now on I will 
make sure your days are filled with joy.”

Erestor smiled against Haldir’s chest at hearing that promise and 
allowed himself to drift off into reverie of what could be.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You are doing excellently!” said Camfael, proud that Erestor was 
finally walking unaided. Several months had passed since Erestor had 
woken from his death-like sleep, and the rate at which he was 
recovering was amazing. Camfael had the distinct impression that 
Haldir’s presence was responsible for Erestor’s speedy recovery.

When he had first discovered the sentry in bed with Erestor – sleeping 
innocently, nothing more – he hadn’t known what to think of it. 
Knowing that Erestor was bound to someone else told him that Haldir 
and Erestor could never truly be happy. But when he had seen the care 
and love with which Haldir surrounded Erestor, he had 
wholeheartedly approved. These two should make the best of the time 
given to them. 

“Now steady yourself!” Seeing Erestor sway unexpectedly alarmed 
Camfael. But then Erestor reached for the wall and smiled reassuringly 
at him. “I am very proud of you.”

Erestor blushed weakly. He still had a hard time accepting any 
compliments. “Thank you.”

“When will Haldir join us?” Camfael knew perfectly well that the 
sentry was on patrol, and if someone knew when he was expected back, 
it was Erestor. 

“He will be back when Ithil rises.”

/That is good,/ thought Camfael. During the few nights that Haldir 
hadn’t been able to sleep at Erestor’s side, the dark-haired Elf’s sleep 
had been plagued by nightmares. Erestor would wake up, screaming for 
his babies and blaming himself for their deaths. Camfael had tried to 
talk to Erestor about the miscarriage on several occasions, but his 
patient never let him, clinging to his feelings of hurt and guilt. 

Erestor seated himself next to the window and fumbled with the fabric 
of his robes. These last few weeks he had grown strong again and the 
fact that Elrond wasn’t drawing any energy from him helped. Elrond… 
He couldn’t help but wonder. “Master Camfael? Is there any news of 
Elrond Half-Elven and his family?” 

Camfael had wondered before why Erestor was this interested in the 
Peredhel but always told him everything he knew. “The Lady Arwen 
left Lothlorien a month ago. It is a pity you did not see her. Her beauty 
is said to be unrivaled.”

Erestor nodded slowly. Since reaching her majority, Arwen frequently 
visited her grandparents. He had heard that she got on especially well 
with Galadriel, which made him wonder if Arwen was as cold and 
manipulative as Galadriel. The thought alone made him shiver.

“The Lady Celebrian announced a visit and should already be on her 
way here.” Camfael tried to think of more details for Erestor. “Lord 
Elrond sent us several books on lore and healing methods and they are 
a great contribution to our library. Perhaps you will want to study 
them later?”

“He is happy, then,” whispered Erestor, uncertain of his own feelings. 
/I wonder what kind of man Elrond has become./ It seemed unlikely he 
would ever meet the half-Elf again and forced himself to think of 
something else. “I heard Orcs were sighted near our borders?” 

“Haldir must have told you that.” Camfael had advised against upsetting 
Erestor in any way, but Haldir always updated the dark-haired Elf on 
what happened near the borders. “Aye, it is true. They are trying to 
invade our lands, but Lord Celeborn has taken appropriate measures.”

/Aye, that is why Haldir cannot be here,/ thought Erestor, saddened. 
The march warden had accepted command and was now responsible 
for keeping their borders safe. Such responsibility limited the time he 
could spend with Erestor.

Erestor composed himself. Haldir had already done so much for him! 
He would never have woken up if it hadn’t been for the silver-haired 
sentry who now guarded his heart. 

But still it felt wrong. It should be Elrond and not Haldir who held the 
key to his heart. But Camfael had just told him how happy the half-Elf 
was and it was time to let go of old hopes.

“Would you like to play a game of chess?” Camfael had tried to make 
playing chess a daily habit. The game forced Erestor to concentrate and 
honed his fine motor skills.

Erestor smiled and nodded. He had lost every game they had ever 
played, but was determined to win one day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Lirimaer? I am back.” Haldir had soundlessly made his way over to 
Erestor’s bed. Sitting down on the side, he found that the dark-haired 
Elf was already awake. “I am sorry I am late, but we ran into a pack of 
Orcs. They are constantly trying to infiltrate the lands.”

Arien’s golden rays warmed the room, telling Erestor it was already 
morning. He had spent the night alone then… Without nightmares! 
Now that did surprise him! 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” asked Haldir, smiling. Seeing 
the still dreamy expression in Erestor’s eyes, he leaned in closer and 
kissed him. 

Erestor sighed, melting into the kiss. He parted his lips, allowing 
Haldir’s inquisitive tongue past his teeth and then sucked gently on the 
tip. Haldir tasted like the forest, of blueberries and earth. The scents 
made his head reel and he pushed himself into a sitting position, 
possessively wrapping his arms around Haldir’s neck. “I have missed 
you.”

“And I you, lirimaer.” Haldir nipped playfully at Erestor’s bottom lip 
and then sat back, studying the dark-haired Elf. Almost a year had 
passed since Erestor had woken up and so far, they had limited 
themselves to kissing. A part of him knew that what they were doing 
was wrong; that the only one who could make Erestor truly happy was 
Elrond, but in the meantime he would be damned if he let Erestor 
suffer from loneliness! He read the same realization in Erestor’s eyes. 
The other Elf also knew that his happiness lay with Elrond, but despair 
had gotten the better of him, making him accept Haldir’s offer. Haldir 
promised himself to never regret any of this. He had long realized that 
they would probably never go all the way, would never make love, 
because Erestor’s fëa was entwined with Elrond’s and not with his. 

A sad, regretful look slipped into Erestor’s eyes, making Haldir 
remember. “Do you still want to visit the tomb today?” It had taken 
Erestor this long to build the necessary courage to visit his sons’ last 
resting place. And when he had heard Erestor planned on going there, 
Haldir had immediately offered to accompany him. 

“Aye, and will you come with me?” Erestor’s fingers curled around 
Haldir’s, hoping the silver-haired Elf hadn’t changed his mind. He truly 
didn’t know if he could go there alone.

“Of course.” Haldir smiled reassuringly. “But first I need to return to 
my talan for a quick wash and a clean set of clothes. I will return to you 
within the hour. Make sure you are ready to leave, then?”

“I will be ready,” said Erestor in a shaky tone. He had to do this!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

/Oh, Nienna, please give me strength…/ Now that he was standing in 
front of the small, marble tomb, his strength was quickly leaving him. 
Thankfully Haldir was at his side, supporting him and making sure he 
stayed on his feet. /My little ones, I never wanted for you to die./ 

“Erestor?” Worried, Haldir searched Erestor’s dark eyes. The pupils 
were dilated and the black orbs were swimming with tears. “You are 
not to blame, remember that. This was Seregon’s doing.”

Sudden curiosity overwhelmed Erestor. “Whatever happened to Telu?” 

Haldir shuffled nervously. He would have preferred not to tell Erestor. 
“We failed to keep your miscarriage a secret and word spread quickly.” 
He cringed, seeing Erestor grow pale. “We tried to keep it private, 
but…”

Erestor bowed his head. “So everyone knows?”

“Most of the sentries know, aye.” Haldir cleared his throat. “When Telu 
learned that you had lost your babies, he… he felt terribly ashamed. He 
volunteered for the next mission and when we ran into a pack of 
Orcs… He was hit by several poisoned arrows… He died.”

“So my sacrifice was in vain. Telu is dead.” Erestor stared at the tomb, 
which held his sons’ remains. “Everything was in vain. My sons are 
dead and Telu as well.”

Haldir’s nervousness increased. There was something else Erestor 
should know. “Do you remember Seregon? The guard, who placed his 
dagger against your throat?”

“I do… vaguely.” Everything had become a blur, for which he was 
grateful. He didn’t want to remember the moment he had felt his 
babies’ inner lights go out. 

“Lord Celeborn banished him from Lothlorien for what he did. The last 
thing I heard was that he found a new home with the Elves in 
Mirkwood. Lord Celeborn was enraged when he heard what had 
happened.”

“Enraged?” Erestor’s mind suddenly flashed back to the moment when 
Celeborn had placed the tiny bodies inside the tomb. “He even said a 
prayer.” 

Haldir shivered, seeing the distant look in Erestor’s eyes. He knew 
instinctively that the other Elf’s mind had traveled back to the day of 
the funeral and was now reliving painful memories. He tightened his 
embrace, pulling Erestor close to his chest. “Celeborn was more 
affected than he wanted any of us to know. He does not always agree 
with Galadriel, but for some reason he never openly objects to her 
decisions.”

Erestor rested his head against Haldir’s shoulder. “I would have loved 
to see them grow up, you know.” He hadn’t really heard Haldir’s 
words, as he was being consumed with old and familiar pain. “I wonder 
what they would have looked like, if they had lived.”

Haldir swallowed hard; he had to offer Erestor some comfort. “I am 
sure they would have been handsome, tall, dark-eyed and raven-
haired, as Elrond and you are both dark-haired. Your sons would have 
been excellent warriors and healers. They would have made you 
proud.”

Tears left Erestor’s eyes as he tried to imagine what they would have 
looked like. “And Elrond would have been proud of them as well.” He 
cocked his head and made eye contact with the sentry. “They never 
told him, did they?”

"As far as I can tell, nay, they never did.” Erestor trembled against him 
and Haldir deemed the time had come to leave this place. “We should 
go back.”

“Not yet, please…” Erestor resolutely freed himself of Haldir’s embrace 
and walked over to the tomb. He placed both hands on top of the 
marble, bowed his head and focused inward. /I am sorry, little ones. I 
cannot say that enough. It is because of my cowardice that you died. 
Wish I could hold you in my arms./

Haldir hurried over to Erestor’s side when the raven-haired Elf swayed 
on his feet and steadied him. “Do not torment yourself in this way, 
lirimaer. The little ones would not want that, and you make my heart 
ache.”

“I do not want to cause you any pain, Haldir,” said Erestor softly. “And 
I will cause you pain. I know it.”

“I make my own decisions. I decide whom I love. And you hold a very 
special place inside my heart.” 

Erestor knew he couldn’t change Haldir’s mind and accepted what the 
other Elf was offering him. “I am done here.”

“Good, then let us go back inside.” Haldir kept his arm around Erestor’s 
waist as they made their way back. /You need to know that you are 
loved and I will do my best to convince you how truly loved you are./

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Let me take care of you tonight,” said Haldir in a tender tone. Visiting 
the tomb had emotionally drained Erestor and he wanted to take away 
the worst pain. 

“I trust you,” replied Erestor, sitting down on the bed. 
“Unconditionally.”

That trust, shining from Erestor’s eyes, convinced Haldir to take the 
next step. “Let me give you one evening of peace and bliss.”

Erestor didn’t have the strength, or the will to reject Haldir. He wanted 
this as well. When the silver-haired Elf began to undress him, he 
watched Haldir with interest, wondering about the other’s plans. 

Haldir removed Erestor’s tunic, boots, leggings, and even the loincloth. 
“Lie down, lirimaer.” 

Erestor complied and lay down on his stomach, watching Haldir from 
over his shoulder. His breathing hitched, seeing the march warden 
remove his clothes as well. /What are you doing, Haldir?/

Haldir smiled reassuringly and picked up a phial filled with scented oil. 
“You are tense, lirimaer, and I have been told that I give wonderful 
massages. Let me ease those tense muscles.”

Erestor nodded once and then rested his brow on his forearms, giving 
Haldir permission to do whatever he wanted. He gasped softly when 
Haldir straddled his lower back and memories of Elrond taking him 
rushed back to him. 

“Relax for me, lirimaer. I would sooner cut off my own arm than cause 
you pain.  Remember, I promised to never hurt you and to always be 
gentle with you. I always keep my word.”

Erestor swallowed hard. “I do trust you, but… ‘tis hard for me. It brings 
back memories.”

And Haldir suddenly understood. “I won’t take you, lirimaer. I will 
never hurt you in that way.” Part of him knew Erestor wasn’t meant 
for him. Maybe if they had met at a different time, a different place… 
After opening the phial he let a generous amount of oil flow onto the 
palm of his hand. Rubbing his palms together, he warmed the oil before 
putting his hands on Erestor’s back. 

Tensing at first, Erestor bit his bottom lip, hoping Haldir wouldn’t 
change his mind. /But nay, this is Haldir and he will never hurt me./ 
Once that realization sank in fully, he began to relax and moaned 
whenever Haldir worked on a particularly sore and tense area. 

Haldir loved hearing those soft moans. “I gather this feels good?”

“Very… good,” mumbled Erestor blissfully. Haldir’s hands were 
working their magic, and after kneading the tense shoulder muscles, 
they now traveled to his lower back. 

Feeling Erestor’s surrender -- and his need -- Haldir leaned in closer 
and placed butterfly kisses on one shoulder. Erestor briefly squirmed 
beneath him, but then purred softly. /Ah, you like that./ Growing 
bolder, he suckled an earlobe whilst running his fingertips down the 
dark-haired Elf’s neck. It was beyond him how Elrond could have been 
so cruel when he had claimed Erestor. This Elf deserved to be treated 
with love and respect. 

When Haldir’s hands settled on his buttocks, Erestor did tense. “What 
are you doing?”

“You trust me, remember?” Haldir kneaded the soft mounds of flesh, 
but did not attempt to touch that most hidden place, knowing Erestor 
was not ready for such intimacy. Instead, he focused on the massage, 
hoping it would lure Erestor back into relaxation. “Would you turn 
around for me? Then I can do your front as well. You are very tense, 
lirimaer.”

/My front?/ Erestor wasn’t sure what to think of that, but he complied 
and rolled onto his back. Haldir’s powerful yet gentle hands now rested 
on his chest and touched him carefully. He wondered about the silver-
haired Elf’s intentions when Haldir moved further down and his eyes 
widened when oil-slick fingers touched his lax member. 

Haldir stroked Erestor’s member softly, bowed forward and kissed him. 
Erestor reacted passionately in spite of his surprise, reassuring Haldir 
that he wanted this as well. 

Haldir’s tongue now circled one hard nipple and then sucked it 
insistently, slowly preparing Erestor for what was to come. He kept up 
the lazy stroking of Erestor’s hardening flesh and let his tongue trail 
down the flat abdomen. He had finally reached his goal when he could 
lick the tip of Erestor’s shaft. He was aware of Erestor’s eyes upon him 
and smiled. Erestor really did trust him unconditionally. Cupping 
Erestor’s sac within the palm of one hand, he used the other to stroke 
his inner thigh. Haldir then relaxed his throat and slowly closed his lips 
around the hard flesh rising from Erestor’s groin. 

“Oh!” Erestor yelped softly at that delicious sensation. He had no idea 
what Haldir was doing or why he was doing it, but his body liked it. 
Now that he was buried in Haldir’s warm, wet mouth, his body reacted 
instinctively, urging him to thrust.

Placing one hand on Erestor’s hips, Haldir made sure the dark-haired 
Elf couldn’t thrust too strongly and took him as deeply as he could. 
Casting a glance at Erestor, Haldir saw the baffled surprise in the dark 
eyes. Passion, pleasure and curiosity stared back at him. 

“Ha… Ha…Hal…” In the end, Erestor gave up on addressing Haldir. 
The sensations that were running through him were divine. His 
instincts urged him to tangle his fingers in the long strands of silver 
hair, which he did, and fascinated, he watched the bobbing motion of 
Haldir’s head.

Grinning between licks and subtle suckling, Haldir felt Erestor tremble 
with impending release.

“Hahl…diiir!” Erestor briefly tensed when reaching release, but as 
orgasm took him, he utterly relaxed beneath Haldir. “Ai…” His eyes 
were still fastened on Haldir and they widened, realizing the silver-
haired beauty was swallowing his seed. “Aiya…aah.”

Haldir neatly licked Erestor clean before letting the sated flesh slip 
from his lips. Purring like a cat, he moved closer to Erestor and buried 
him in an embrace. Sealing their encounter with a kiss, he waited for 
Erestor to collect himself.

Realizing Haldir was still hard, Erestor wondered what to do. Haldir 
had just given him the most shattering orgasm he’d ever had and he felt 
like he should return the favor. But he wasn’t so sure he could take 
Haldir into his mouth and bring him to orgasm in that way. 

Haldir read all that and more in Erestor’s eyes and gently guided the 
dark-haired Elf’s hand to his erection. He curled the other’s fingers 
around his aching flesh and then recommenced kissing him. 

Erestor felt relieved, now that he knew what Haldir needed from him. 
Stroking firmly, he allowed the other Elf’s tongue to entwine with his. 

Haldir came after a few firm strokes delivered by Erestor’s hand and he 
moaned into the other Elf’s mouth, finding release. 

And yet, at that moment they both knew their love couldn’t be. Part of 
Erestor wasn’t present, was with the half-Elf. Still trembling from his 
release, Haldir wiped away the salty tears that had escaped Erestor’s 
eyes. “I do love you, lirimaer.”

Erestor’s throat tightened with emotion. “And I love you, Haldir of 
Lorien, but…”

“Your soul belongs to someone else.” 

“I wish it did not.” Erestor meant it. He loved Haldir and knew the 
sentry would have made him happy. “But the Valar decided 
differently.”

“I will be content with what you can give me, lirimaer,” said Haldir, 
remembering his promise to never regret this. “And now, let us sleep.”

Erestor sighed deeply, allowing Haldir to maneuver him onto his side 
so the silver-haired Elf could spoon up behind. Being held tightly, he 
quickly fell asleep. 

Haldir however, finally allowed a single tear to flow from his hazel 
eyes and kissed the long, dark hair in front of him and whispered 
softly, “I love you and will never regret this, melethwain-nín.” (my 
most beloved.)

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine.

Heart in Chains
Part 14



“Haldir!” Overjoyed that his lover had returned from patrol early, 
Erestor flung himself at the guardian, who opened his arms just in time 
to catch him. “I missed you!”

“And I missed you.” Haldir graced his lover with a doting smile, a quick 
kiss delivered to luscious lips, and then slowly pulled Erestor along 
with him, as he headed for the woods. Erestor tended to lock himself 
up in his room when he was away on patrol and he didn’t like that 
behavior. He knew Erestor was terrified of accidentally running into 
Galadriel, but the raven-haired Elf needed to be in the open air, to feel 
the wind play with his hair and the damp earth beneath his feet. “You 
were not this pale when I left,” Haldir said in a disapproving tone. He 
had been away for a fortnight and reckoned Erestor hadn’t been outside 
in that time, as Rumil and Orophin had been on patrol as well and thus 
unable to accompany him on his walks. 

“I studied whilst you were away. I borrowed several books on herb lore 
from Camfael and learned quite a lot,” said Erestor, trying to ignore the 
disapproving tone in Haldir’s voice. “I want to be the best healer on 
Arda.”

“You already are,” replied Haldir in a gentle tone. “Even Elrond needs 
herbs and healing plants to work his art, but you are a true healer, 
lirimaer.” He smiled, seeing Erestor blush. “Now tell me, what 
happened whilst I was away?”

“Not much.” Erestor eagerly leaned in closer when Haldir folded an 
arm around his waist. The guardian then encouraged him to rest his 
head on a muscular shoulder, which Erestor did. 

They walked for several minutes, and halted when they had reached 
the small, marble tomb. Haldir had long realized his lover’s need to 
visit here regularly, but Erestor still lacked the courage to come here 
alone. The dark-haired Elf would only come here when accompanied. 

They sat down on the bench Celeborn had ordered to be placed near 
the tomb, and both stared at the babies’ last resting place. In the end, 
Haldir cleared his throat, unwilling to deliver the news he had to tell 
Erestor. 

Apprehensively, Erestor looked into Haldir’s hazel eyes. “What is it?”

“Something terrible has happened.” Haldir gathered Elrond didn’t 
know yet, as Erestor didn’t seem to be weakening. It was only fair to 
warn Erestor. 

“What happened?” Erestor took hold of Haldir’s hand and squeezed it. 
“Did something happen to Rumil and Orophin?” But no, if something 
were amiss with the brothers, Haldir wouldn’t be sitting here this 
calmly. 

“The Lady Celebrian was attacked on her way back to Imladris. A pack 
of Orcs assaulted her.” Haldir swallowed hard. “Her escort was 
murdered and she was severely injured. I have it on good authority that 
she was… sexually assaulted.”

Erestor had paled. “By the Grace of the Valar… How can anyone do 
that to an Elf?”

“Her sons are currently escorting her back to Imladris. Lord Celeborn 
would have preferred for her to be taken to Lothlorien instead, but 
Elladan and Elrohir wanted to take their mother home, hoping Elrond 
can heal her.”

“Even I cannot heal someone’s fëa,” said Erestor regretfully. His heart 
ached for the Lady, but then he realized what this meant for him 
personally. “Elrond will be devastated when he learns what has 
happened.”

“And he will need your strength. The nightmare will start all over 
again,” said Haldir miserably. “I do not want to lose you to Elrond or to 
catatonia, lirimaer.”

Erestor bowed his head in defeat. “The Lady Celebrian will fade.” He 
had studied enough books on healing to know she wouldn’t survive. 
“And Elrond will be left alone again. What if, in his grief, he will start 
to fade as well?”

“My greatest fear is that Galadriel will now remember your existence. 
She has left you alone, but…”

“I understand your fear,” said Erestor in a shaky tone. “But I am bound 
to Elrond Half-Elven. I agreed to this deal.”

“You agreed because Galadriel pressured you into accepting it!” Haldir, 
growing enraged, suddenly jumped to his feet. “By the Grace of the 
Valar, Erestor! You agreed to her proposal because you were a prisoner! 
You wanted access to the library and to go outside occasionally. 
Galadriel had no right to do this to you!”

Erestor drew in a deep breath, rose from the bench and advanced on 
Haldir. Determinedly, he placed his hands on Haldir’s shoulders and 
waited for the silver-haired Elf to look at him. “We always knew this 
day could come.”

“I vowed to never regret loving you,” whispered Haldir, calm once 
more. “And I will keep my promise.” He knew Erestor would need him 
and his strength in the time to come. Once Elrond found out he would 
lose his wife, the half-Elf would unknowingly draw energy from 
Erestor. He led Erestor back to the bench, where they sat down and 
then Haldir pulled him close. “You will always have my support, 
lirimaer.”

“I know that, but I feel guilty for putting you through this,” whispered 
Erestor, miserably. This was so unfair to Haldir!

“Do not worry about me, melethwain-nín.” Haldir buried Erestor in a 
loving embrace. “We shall face this together.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Unfortunately Haldir wasn’t close when pain unexpectedly cut through 
Erestor’s heart, making him stagger, but Camfael was, and the healer 
quickly steadied his charge. Word of the attack on the Lady Celebrian 
had spread and all Lothlorien now knew. Galadriel and Celeborn had 
gone into seclusion to deal with their grief and the border patrols had 
been increased, forcing Haldir away from Erestor more often. 

“Erestor?” Camfael’s worried eyes met Erestor’s chocolate ones. “What 
is amiss?”

“He found out,” panted Erestor softly. “Elrond finally knows.” At that 
moment, he didn’t realize how much information he was giving away 
by saying that, but when Camfael’s eyes narrowed in sudden 
understanding, he realized his mistake. “Would you… take me… to my 
room? I need… to lie down.” 

“Nay, I cannot keep my eye on you there. You will be alone now that 
Haldir and his brothers are on patrol. I will take you to the healers’ 
talan instead.”

Erestor briefly considered protesting, but when the torment in his 
heart doubled, he simply held on to the healer for support and followed 
where Camfael led him. 

A few minutes later, they arrived in the healers’ talan and Camfael 
guided him to an empty room, located near his own. “Lie down.”

Again, Erestor complied. “Would you… check when Haldir… is 
scheduled…to return?”

“I will, but I doubt he will return shortly.” Camfael stepped into the 
bathroom, wetted a cloth and then returned to place it on Erestor’s 
clammy brow. He gathered Erestor’s hand in his and then checked the 
pulse, which he found much too fast. “I can prepare a tea that will help 
you rest.”

“Thank you… for your care,” whispered Erestor, closing his eyes in 
concentration. Elrond’s emotional agony was growing and quickly 
invading his being. Bound to the half-Elf, Erestor didn’t have any 
defenses against the growing grief. He forced his eyes open again, 
recalling that Camfael had probably figured out his mate’s identity. 
“You cannot… tell anyone.”

Camfael’s expression hardened, but his anger was directed at Celeborn 
and Galadriel, not at Erestor. “You are bound to Elrond Half-Elven.” 
Words, which Celeborn had spoken years ago, now made sense. /He is 
happily married and father of three lovely children. I had no idea he 
was talking about Elrond Half-Elven! What in Elbereth’s name 
possessed them to place such a burden on Erestor? The least they could 
have done was to make the bond mutual./

Erestor saw the play of emotions on Camfael’s face and just knew what 
the healer was thinking. “They did not want him… to bind himself 
to… a kinslayer.”

“Kinslayer.” Camfael had forgotten about that. “You could not kill 
someone even if your life depended on it,” he said with determination. 
“What really happened?”

Erestor understood and swallowed hard. “One of Maglor’s men… had 
driven a dagger… into Rhoss’ heart… I knew that removing it… would 
further the blood loss… so I kept it in place until… I could work my 
healing powers… Orophin found me in that… situation.”

“And he reached the wrong conclusion.” Camfael nodded once. “You 
should have told our Lord and Lady.”

“I did… I tried!” Erestor, growing agitated with frustration, glared at 
Camfael. “I believe… her words were… “I do not want to defile 
myself… with your memories”…I even begged your Lady… to read my 
mind… and find out the truth! She… refused!”

“I am sorry,” whispered Camfael sincerely. “But if it is any consolation 
to you, I think Lord Celeborn no longer feels you are a kinslayer.” 
Realizing he was upsetting Erestor, Camfael tried to steer away from 
their current topic. “Is there anything I can do to ease your pain?”

“Fetch… Haldir,” whispered Erestor, fatigued. 

“I will check for him after I have prepared that tea,” decided Camfael. 
“Maybe it will help after all.”

Erestor nodded, eager for Camfael to leave. He needed to be alone. 
Elrond’s pain was shattering and burying him in darkness. The fact that 
his strength was leaving him so quickly made him feel exhausted. 
 
Camfael headed for the doorway and looked over his shoulder at 
Erestor. The dark-haired Elf had closed his eyes and his fingers clawed 
at the sheets. He felt sympathy and pity for Erestor, but anger toward 
his Lord and Lady. /How could they order this?/ His view of his rulers 
had changed dramatically.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Galadriel’s eyes were red from crying. She had gone to Celeborn for 
consolation and her husband had tried to ease her pain, but to no avail. 
When the news of the assault on Celebrian had reached them, they had 
been devastated. Just when Celebrian and her family had been happy, 
disaster had struck.

She rested her head on Celeborn’s shoulder, and allowed him to enfold 
her. “My heart weeps for her.”

“So does mine.” But Celeborn was trying to act strong for her. His heart 
was breaking as well, but he also knew Galadriel needed him to be her 
support. “If she does not sail for Aman, we will lose her.”

Galadriel nodded against his chest. “I do not want to lose my daughter.”

“I will implore Elrond to convince Celebrian to sail for the Undying 
Lands. That way, you will be reunited with her some day.” Galadriel 
had told him about the future and their separation. Whilst Galadriel 
would sail, he would stay. Celeborn would never be able to say 
goodbye to these lands, as he was rooted here. 

Now that they had been reunited in grief, his frustrations at the way 
she had treated Erestor faded to the background. They needed each 
other to come to terms with losing their only daughter. If Celebrian 
stayed, she would fade within the year. Sailing to Aman was her only 
means of survival. 

“Elrond…” Galadriel’s eyes suddenly narrowed and she slightly pulled 
away from her husband so she could look at him. “Elrond will be 
devastated.”

“And so will Arwen and the twins. They are a close family and letting 
Celebrian sail will injure their souls.”

“But Celebrian does not have a choice.” Composing herself, Galadriel 
walked further away from Celeborn and sat down in a comfortable 
chair. There was little she could do to help Celebrian. Her daughter’s 
future now lay in Aman and when the day of their reunion came, her 
heart would rejoice at holding Celebrian in her arms again. But for 
now, she had to focus on Elrond.

Celeborn shivered, seeing the look in her eyes shift from mourning to 
scheming. 

“Elrond depends on the kinslayer once more. Tell me, what is the state 
of Erestor’s health?”

Celeborn didn’t like that question, but answered it nonetheless. “He has 
grown strong again. The effects of his period of catatonia have been 
undone.”

“Good.” Galadriel’s thoughts raced. “Elrond probably knows by now, 
which means he needs Erestor to sustain him.” Her narrowed eyes 
fastened on her husband’s. “I know Erestor has been seeing Haldir. 
That must stop. We cannot allow such a distraction when Elrond’s life 
may depend on the kinslayer.”

Celeborn tensed. “Galadriel, do you not think we have already 
demanded enough sacrifices on his part? After losing his babies he 
drifted away from us. We cannot—“ 

But Galadriel cut him short. She drew herself up to her full height and 
glared at him. “Erestor killed one of his own kin. He is a kinslayer. I 
know he has tricked you into caring for him, and I am appalled you 
allowed it to happen. I watched Haldir and his brothers attend to him 
and I allowed it. But now I have to put my foot down and demand that 
it stops. Erestor is our prisoner because he has to pay for what he did. 
The way Haldir and you treat him is… unbecoming.”

Celeborn’s eyes widened. “Galadriel,” he hissed in a warning tone.

But she continued at any rate. “He agreed to being bound to Elrond and 
now it is his duty to sustain the Peredhel. If necessary, I will send him 
to Imladris so that he will be closer to Elrond. That way, his healing 
energy will reach Elrond more easily.”

Celeborn shook his head. “I won’t allow you to continue to use him in 
that way.”

“You won’t allow it?” Galadriel’s hands changed into fists and her icy 
eyes simmered with rage. “Erestor forfeited his life when he killed that 
guard and I will do what I deem best for Middle-Earth!”

“I am warning you,” growled Celeborn, who had trouble understanding 
how Galadriel could go from mourning to raging within moments.

“Warning me?” Galadriel shook her head in disbelief. “No husband 
would speak to his wife in such a way!”

Celeborn’s features softened. “I do love you, but at times I do not 
concur with your judgment and this is one of them. Why can you not 
open your heart and see that we misjudged Erestor? He is a true healer 
and I do believe him incapable of ending someone’s life.”

“That is your opinion, not mine. I will farspeak with my daughter to 
find out about her plans. Do not keep me away from Erestor. I will use 
his healing qualities as I see fit.” Considering this argument ended, she 
marched out of the room, chin held high.

Celeborn watched her leave with much pain in his heart. A moment 
ago he had claimed he loved her, but the truth was that he wasn’t sure 
anymore. How could he love a woman whose heart had turned to ice?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Erestor, I hurried back to you as quickly as I could!” Haldir was 
dismayed, seeing the weakening state Erestor was in. A week had 
passed since Elrond had found out about Celebrian’s injuries and the 
half-Elf had drawn his strength from Erestor since then. The result was 
that the formerly healthy blush on Erestor’s cheeks had faded and the 
familiar paleness had returned in its place. Haldir was shocked to see 
the changes in his lover when Erestor shakily rose from the bed to 
greet him. Dark circles were beginning to show beneath the dull, dark 
eyes and it seemed that Erestor was losing weight once more. Leggings 
that had clung to his body a week ago now seemed too loose. “I am 
sorry it took me so long.”

Erestor sighed, feeling Haldir’s arms enfold him. “I am so glad that you 
are back.” He leaned heavily against the march warden, and 
momentarily felt relieved they had been unable to bond. Drawing his 
energy from Haldir was something he had never wanted, knowing how 
weak it would make the warrior feel. “Come and talk to me about what 
you learned during the patrol. Distract me from this.”

Haldir followed Erestor to the chairs in front of the fire place and after 
sitting down, he studied his lover closely, asking him the first thing 
that came to mind. “Why are you not staying in your own rooms?”

“Camfael felt more comfortable having me here. He wants to keep an 
eye on me.”

Haldir nervously licked his lips. “You look tired… drained.”

“’Tis Elrond. You should know that.” Erestor drew in a deep breath. “It 
has only been a week. I wonder how I will fare once Elrond’s grief 
mounts.”

“I will be there for you,” Haldir repeated his promise, whilst gathering 
Erestor’s hands in his. Leaning forward, he held them cradled in his 
own. “I trust Galadriel has left you alone?”

“She has not approached me yet, but she will,” said Erestor with calm 
understanding. 

“You cannot allow her to continue to manipulate you, lirimaer.”

“I do not have a choice,” said Erestor softly. “I accepted this bond.”

His heart ached for Erestor and Haldir reacted on impulse, embracing 
the hurting Elf and placing a kiss on his clammy brow. “I will keep you 
safe.”

“Haldir, melme, that is a promise you might not be able to keep,” 
whispered Erestor, saddened. “But I will always love you for trying.”

Haldir sighed deeply, knowing instinctively Erestor was right. But that 
didn’t keep him from tightening the embrace and rocking his lover 
slowly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Several months passed by and Erestor continued to grow weaker. His 
usually raven hair lost its luster and the chocolate eyes now stared into 
the world with a dull expression. Elrond was grieving and so was 
Erestor.

Haldir grew more frustrated with every day. Most of the time he was 
unable to reach Erestor, who simply stared at him. 

And then more ill tidings reached them. Celebrian had finally made the 
decision to sail for Aman. Haldir had seen Celeborn weep for the first 
time in his life, when the Lord of ‘Lorien had heard that news, but 
when he had looked at Galadriel, the guardian had found her eyes dry 
and cold, which had caused him to shiver. 

He worried most about Erestor, of course. His lover had become a mere 
shadow of his former self. 

When Galadriel finally approached him, Haldir realized he had to be 
extremely careful around her.

“Haldir, I have new orders for you.” Galadriel tried to act regally and 
composed, but inwardly she seethed. Her original plans had been 
sabotaged by her husband and she had to adjust her plans. 
 
”Aye, my Lady.” As required, Haldir bowed respectfully. 

“Now that my daughter is on her way to Aman, Elrond expressed the 
wish to visit us for a while. He is grieving and growing weaker every 
day.”

“I regret hearing that,” Haldir forced the words past his teeth, while 
thinking, /And do you ever think of Erestor, who is growing weaker as 
well?/ 

“I want Erestor moved to a talan closer to Elrond’s temporary quarters.” 
She had already changed her plans and would make certain her will 
would be done eventually. “After you have done that, you will return 
to your duties, which you have neglected these last few months. I want 
you to patrol the borders and drive away the Orcs that dare approach 
our lands.”

Haldir’s eyes narrowed with suspicion. /She is sending me away so I 
cannot protect him!/

“Elrond will arrive in the morning so I suggest you hurry.” Galadriel 
gave him a triumphant look, gathered her skirts and swept around, 
almost floating out of the room. 

Haldir glared at her back. /You might be able to send me away, but 
Rumil, Orophin and Camfael will watch Erestor in my place./ But he 
would have preferred guarding Erestor against Galadriel personally.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor barely reacted when Galadriel’s servants came to move him to 
his new talan. He didn’t object and meekly followed them. His mind 
was entangled too deeply in Elrond’s pain and it was nearly impossible 
to focus on what was happening around him. 

“Erestor? Melethwain-nín?” Haldir knelt in front of Erestor and 
gathered the cold hands in his. Looking at the still form seated in the 
comfortable chair, his heart contracted painfully. He had even briefly 
entertained the idea of taking Erestor away from here, but had quickly 
realized Galadriel would never allow that. She had even assigned her 
personal guards to watch Erestor’s every move. 

“Haldir.” Erestor managed a weak smile. He had hoped his lover would 
seek him out before leaving for the borders again. He weakly squeezed 
Haldir’s fingers, letting the guardian know how much he appreciated 
his lover’s presence. “Be careful out there.”

Haldir’s heart missed a beat. “Do not worry about me, lirimaer. It is you 
who must be careful. Now that I will be away, Galadriel will move in. 
Be very alert and do not agree to anything she proposes. Contact 
Celeborn when she makes unreasonable demands. Celeborn is on your 
side.” 

“That is good to know,” mumbled Erestor weakly, but he doubted 
Celeborn would openly oppose his wife. He would keep Haldir’s advice 
in mind, however. “Please return to me quickly. I need you, Haldir.”

Haldir nodded once, and new determination was born in his eyes. He 
would find a way to hurry back to Erestor’s side.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor shivered with discomfort when Galadriel entered the room. His 
instincts had told him to expect her, and he forced himself to rise from 
his chair, bowing his head in respect. “My Lady.”

Galadriel studied him with a cold and distant expression in her blue 
eyes. She only felt loathing for him. She positioned herself opposite 
him, her hands hidden in her long sleeves. “Elrond has arrived.”

“I know that. I can sense his closeness.” Erestor forced himself to 
maintain eye contact, even though the hatred was obvious in her orbs. 
“He is grieving.”

Galadriel knew she couldn’t allow him to address Celebrian. She was 
grieving for her daughter herself and she couldn’t show any weakness 
when dealing with Erestor. “Your healing abilities are needed once 
more.”

Erestor laughed embittered, not caring what she thought of his 
reaction. “Do you not mean that I have to reconfirm the bond by 
letting him claim me?” The amount of healing energy that such a union 
would create would strengthen Elrond immensely. “I am no fool, my 
Lady. During my years of confinement I had enough time to ponder my 
future and I always knew it would come to this.”

Galadriel’s expression hardened. “You agreed to this.”

“When I agreed to it, I had no idea I would conceive and lose my 
babies!” Erestor exploded with emotion, uncaring about the 
consequences. “You have lost your daughter… Can you now imagine 
how I felt when I lost my babies?”

Galadriel’s eyes shot daggers. “Do not dare to compare my daughter to 
your bastards!”

Erestor’s eyes widened and he staggered, collapsing onto the chair. “My 
bastards? Elrond is my mate! They were conceived and born into a 
marriage you never allowed to be completed!”

Galadriel stalked toward him. “You will stop this nonsense. I did not 
come here to listen to you rave. Tonight, one of my guards will take 
you to Elrond and you will make sure he remains on Arda. Elrond 
Half-Elven will be instrumental in defeating Sauron when the dark one 
decides to return. You will do as you are told.”

Erestor just stared at her in shock. “And what when I conceive again?” 
He recalled the pain he had been in when Elrond had claimed him 
after the Battle of the Last Alliance, but it didn’t compare to his agony 
when he had lost his children. He would go to Elrond and allow the 
half-Elf to bed him because he had agreed to this pact millennia ago, 
but he was not willing to face another miscarriage.

“I do not care if you conceive,” said Galadriel, leaning in closer and 
placing her hands on the armrests at either side of Erestor’s body. “I do 
not care if your babies live or die. My goal is to ensure Elrond’s 
survival.”

“You are ruthless.” Erestor flinched beneath her icy glare.

“Do not cross me, Erestor. If you do, you will learn the meaning of true 
torment.”

Erestor lifted his large eyes to meet with hers. “I lost two sons… I 
already know the meaning of true torment.”

Galadriel’s eyes flared. “You only think you do.”  
 

Those words froze the blood in his veins. 

“You will go to Elrond and submit to him. And you will continue to do 
that as many times as necessary for Elrond to find his strength again. 
Do you understand?”

Erestor swallowed hard and then nodded. “I understand.” He watched 
her leave the room and felt immensely relieved when she was out of 
his sight. 

“Nienna, please help me,” he whispered a plea to the Vala of sorrow.  
He wouldn’t survive losing another baby.

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine.

Heart in Chains
Part 15



Erestor sat quietly near the fireplace, watching the flames dance. None 
of the other elements ever seemed so alive to him, as flames. Fire 
seemed to have a life – and a will – of its own. 

“The Lady Galadriel sent me,” said one of Galadriel’s personal guards, 
announcing his presence. He had already cleared his throat in the hope 
to attract Erestor’s attention, but the other Elf had ignored him. 

Shaken from his musings, Erestor tiredly pushed himself to his feet. “I 
am ready.” He had tried to mentally prepare himself for the pain that 
would follow shortly, but had failed. He was tense, slightly afraid and 
he basically didn’t want to do this. But he also realized he had little 
choice. “I will follow you.” He gathered his black cloak around him and 
stared at the guard.

The guard frowned, seeing large, chocolate eyes in a sea of blue. Had 
his Lady rubbed blue paint onto Erestor’s brow? He had seen it once 
before; at Galadriel and Celeborn’s wedding to be precise. It had been 
the Lord of the Golden Wood’s brown that had been blue back then. 
He knew it had a certain ceremonial, maybe even spiritual, meaning, 
but that was a secret that had remained undisclosed to him. And now 
Erestor was wearing it as well. 

Erestor forced his nervousness into a distant corner of his mind. He 
consoled himself with the thought that at least now he knew what to 
expect. The first time Elrond had claimed him had been a shocking 
experience to him. 

Following the guard, Erestor hid his features in the shadow of his hood. 
He sensed a presence and looked up into the talan, and found Galadriel 
standing there, her face utterly expressionless. The sight of her caused 
shivers to run down his back and he quickly averted his eyes.

“This is where Lord Elrond is staying,” said the guard. “We distracted 
Lord Glorfindel and will make sure you won’t be interrupted tonight.”

Glorfindel of Gondolin. The reborn Balrog Slayer had accompanied 
Elrond here, then. Erestor had met him once before, only briefly, but 
the azure eyes had radiated kindness back then. He nodded, affirming 
he had heard and understood, and then opened the door to soundlessly 
make his way inside.

The door was closed behind him and he drew in a deep breath, finding 
Elrond asleep on the bed. Galadriel had probably given him a sleeping 
potion so the half-Elf wouldn’t be completely lucid when claiming him. 
For one moment he asked himself if Elrond had ever wondered about 
the night in which they had bound. Did the Peredhel think of it as a 
dream or was Elrond convinced it had really happened? /Even if he 
believes it happened, he never tried to find me./

Releasing the breath that he had involuntarily been holding, he walked 
toward the bed. With a single movement from his hand, he undid the 
belt and let his robes and cloak slide down his body. Looking at Elrond, 
he wondered why the half-Elf had hurt him so badly that first time… 
Would history repeat itself? Would he end up torn and bleeding again? 
/Asking myself these questions is pointless. I had better do this now. 
Then, I can return to my rooms and wait there for Haldir./ 

He knelt on the bed. The movement made Elrond stir and the gray eyes 
half-opened. The misty expression in them told him that Galadriel had 
indeed drugged Elrond. “Everything will be all right in the end.” Even 
though Elrond had caused him pain in the past, he couldn’t help but 
reach out now. Millennia ago he had promised Elwing to take care of 
the twins. He had lost Elros to mortality, but at least Elrond was still 
alive. 

“Celebrian?” 

Elrond sounded confused and Erestor instantly soothed him. “Nay, I am 
not Celebrian.” Still kneeling, he waited for Elrond to act. 

And act the half-Elf did. “Ereinion?” 

Elrond unexpectedly sat up and grabbed Erestor which a force he didn’t 
expect. Erestor yielded at once, knowing that struggling would only 
increase the pain. He forced himself to remain motionless when Elrond 
laid him down on his back, forcing his legs apart with a knee. Tightly 
closing his eyes, he prepared himself for the invasive pain and hoped 
Elrond would finish quickly. 

“I missed you, Ereinion. I thought you had left me. Thank you for 
visiting me in this dream.” 

/A dream?/ So Elrond thought this was a dream? Erestor shivered, 
feeling Elrond’s probing fingers explore his body. Suddenly they 
focused on his nipples, teasing them into hardness. He gasped at the 
unexpected sensation and when a moist tongue played with them, he 
involuntarily arched his back.

“So eager. You always were eager, melme,” Elrond purred with a need 
that had to be met. “You are mine. You will never leave me again.” 

Erestor’s eyes opened, startled, sensing the head of the half-Elf’s 
erection against his opening. “Nay, please…” He hadn’t wanted to beg, 
but memories of pain, tearing and bleeding made him go rigid. If 
Elrond took him now, the half-Elf would certainly injure him. 

“What is amiss, Ereinion? You never stopped me before.”

Erestor held his breath, as Elrond searched his eyes and he quickly 
closed them, stopping the half-Elf from imprinting them in his 
memory. Galadriel would be furious if he didn’t play his part. /But the 
pain… I remember it too clearly!/

Elrond suddenly shifted atop of him, maneuvered him into the desired 
position and he found himself lying on the side of the bed. His feet 
were now planted firmly on the floor and Elrond slid his arms beneath 
his buttocks, lifting them slightly. 

Erestor felt utterly exposed and vulnerably and opened his eyes, only to 
find Elrond kneeling on the floor. The half-Elf suddenly leaned in 
closer and the moist tip of the Peredhel’s tongue now teased against his 
opening. Elrond’s tongue danced against his entrance and suddenly 
dipped inside, making him cry out at the sensation, which was 
surprisingly pleasant. The other thing that completely stunned him was 
the fact that he had grown erect. His hard flesh stood proud and 
Erestor thought he would faint when Elrond’s fingers curled around it, 
stroking firmly. His fingers clawed at the sheet, hating himself for 
being this weak and helpless. But even more he hated himself for 
enjoying it. 

Then Elrond’s talented tongue dipped deeply into his passage, leaving 
him whimpering softly. He was close to finding release and wondered 
if Elrond would make him come. Staring at Elrond in bewilderment, he 
read the half-Elf’s intent in his stormy eyes when the Peredhel pulled 
back. 

“I apologize,” whispered Elrond in a sincere tone. “I thought you had 
prepared yourself for me, like you always do when we make love. I do 
not seem to have any oil, but I will be careful, I promise.”

Elrond’s words slightly reassured Erestor, who suddenly understood 
why the half-Elf had hurt him that first time. /He thought I had 
prepared myself. He never wanted to hurt me./

He wasn’t allowed more time to ponder this revelation, as Elrond 
pushed him back into the center of the bed. After kneeling on the bed, 
Elrond grabbed his hips, and pushed a pillow beneath them. Erestor 
swallowed hard, knowing what would come next. /By the Grace of the 
Valar, please let him finish quickly!/ He stared at the ceiling, bit his 
bottom lip and clawed at the pillow.

Suddenly Elrond’s fingers wrapped around his shaft, and continued to 
pump him. Soon, he was moaning softly, and in the throes of 
impending orgasm. This encounter was nothing like he had thought it 
would be! 

When Elrond finally entered him, Erestor went limp and tried to relax, 
knowing it would hurt less that way. But Elrond still felt huge inside 
him and the half-Elf’s hard flesh caused a burning sensation deep inside 
him. At least Elrond was inching inside *slowly* and the pain was not 
as bad as it had been that first time. 

“Meleth-nîn? Why are you this tense? Am I not pleasing you? I know 
you prefer to be taken hard, but I thought…”

“Hard?” Erestor gasped the moment Elrond completely sheathed 
himself. He was afraid to even draw in his next breath, but he had to 
say something! “I do not wish to be taken hard. Please be gentle with 
me.”

“As you wish, melamin.” 

Erestor was doing his best to remain motionless and to relax his tense 
muscles, but was doing poorly. However, that changed when Elrond 
suddenly leaned in closer, somehow managing to claim his lips and 
engaging his tongue in a sensual dance.

Elrond thrust for the first time and Erestor groaned into the other’s 
mouth. The burning sensation grew worse and tears were beginning to 
build in his eyes. 

“Melme? I can feel your distress. What am I doing wrong?” Elrond was 
at a loss. Ereinion had never reacted like this before when they had 
made love! 

“Do not stop… Continue!” Erestor hissed the words, eager to get this 
ordeal over with. His member had softened and tears flowed down his 
face.

“Nay…” Elrond had no idea what was wrong, but although his need to 
find release was overwhelming, he wanted to please his lover as well. “I 
won’t leave you behind.” 
 
Erestor was taken aback, feeling Elrond’s lips close over his. The 
passion in the kiss which Elrond delivered to him surprised him and he 
found himself reacting, kissing the half-Elf back. Agile fingers were 
coaxing him back to hardness and when the next thrust came, Elrond 
timed it with the stroke which he delivered to his erection. 

Erestor’s eyes almost bulged from their sockets, feeling impending 
orgasm built in him and he buried one hand in Elrond’s dark mane. 
During the next moments his world narrowed to their lovemaking and 
he instinctively met Elrond’s next thrust by arching his back. Soon, 
they had established a rhythm and Erestor was moving along with 
Elrond, lifting his hips to meet the Peredhel half way. A few more firm 
strokes delivered to his shaft pushed him toward ecstasy. Unable to 
hold back, he bit down on Elrond’s bottom lip when he reached 
orgasm.

Elrond surrendered to the divine sensation of Erestor’s inner muscle 
contracting around his throbbing member. As his lover was suckling on 
his bleeding lip, he was careful not to move his head, but he managed 
to deliver one last stroke, which catapulted him to orgasm as well. 
Buried deeply inside his lover, he released his seed. 

Erestor finally released the bleeding lip and stared at Elrond in 
disbelief. The half-Elf had brought him to orgasm, had not left him 
behind, just as he had promised. But why? /He thinks you are 
Ereinion,/ supplied the rational part of his mind that was still 
functioning. /He loved Ereinion./

“Stay with me, meleth-nîn. Do not leave me alone again,” pleaded 
Elrond in a heartbreaking tone. “I need you here with me, even if you 
are only a dream.” In order to make sure that he wouldn’t be left alone, 
he wrapped his arms and legs around the Elf beneath him. His sated 
flesh had left the other’s body and he now snuggled up to him. 

Erestor wasn’t sure what to make of Elrond’s request and simply 
remained motionless. That tactic had served him well tonight. 
Releasing the fabric he had been clawing at, he placed his hands on 
Elrond’s lower back, which was the only place he could easily reach. 
His connection to the half-Elf told him that Elrond was falling fast 
asleep and he called upon his last strength, letting it flow into the half-
Elf’s mind and body, losing consciousness in the process.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An hour later, Erestor finally woke, finding that Elrond was still resting 
atop of him. The Peredhel had cuddled up to him and was 
subconsciously rubbing his shoulder. The small, affectionate gesture 
took him aback. /Oh, I could have loved you,/ he realized that instant. 

Elrond mumbled something unintelligible, which urged Erestor into 
action, realizing the half-Elf would wake up shortly. Briefly he rebelled 
against his fate. Why couldn’t he stay here and reveal himself to 
Elrond? Maybe the half-Elf would accept him in his life? 

/Galadriel will never allow it./ 

Erestor wriggled away from underneath Elrond and rolled away from 
the half-Elf. Experimentally he sat up. Although he felt sore, the pain 
he had felt that first time remained absent. Elrond had been careful not 
to tear him, for which he was grateful.

Seeing Elrond shiver, Erestor reacted instinctively by covering him 
with a warm blanket. It would take Elrond some time to recover from 
losing his wife, but the Peredhel was strong and would overcome his 
grief. He just hoped he didn’t have to be intimate with Elrond ever 
again. Although he had enjoyed their mating, he still worried about 
another pregnancy. What if he had conceived? Elrond had found 
release inside his body, so it was possible he had conceived. But only 
time would tell if he was with child – or children – again.

Erestor slowly pushed himself to his feet after gathering his robes and 
slipped into them. He draped his cloak over his shoulders and gingerly 
made his way over to the doorway. Looking back over his shoulder, he 
wished Elrond loved him as much as the half-Elf had loved Ereinion.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once Erestor had returned to his room, he went into the bathroom to 
clean himself up. After slipping into a soft nightshirt, he made his way 
over to his bed, where he curled up on his side. Still feeling sore, he 
wished Haldir were here to ease the burden he was forced to carry, but 
he wasn’t sure the guardian would still want anything to do with him 
once Haldir found out he had allowed Elrond to bed him -- again.

Involuntarily his hand settled over his abdomen. /Did I conceive? And 
if I did, will I lose this little one as well?/ Galadriel had already told him 
she didn’t care about his ‘bastards’, but what about Elrond? Wouldn’t 
the half-Elf want to know he had fathered and lost twins? /But do I 
really want to burden him with that knowledge? They died and there is 
nothing he can do about it. Telling him would not be fair./

“Erestor? Lirimaer?” Haldir, who had hurried back to his lover’s side, 
startled at seeing Erestor’s body language. He had sneaked away from 
camp and had to return within the hour, but he had to make sure 
Erestor was well and safe.

“Haldir?” Erestor’s eyes opened, revealing his shock. Staring into the 
march warden’s hazel eyes, he was overcome by shame and quickly 
looked away. 

Haldir’s heart clenched with pain, finding Erestor averting his gaze. 
“Aiya, nay… Do not tell me she hurt you again.” He sat down on the 
side of the bed and waited for Erestor to make eye contact with him. 
When the chocolate eyes finally met his, he read the truth in them. 
“She forced you to lay with him.”

“She did not force me,” whispered Erestor in a broken tone, wondering 
if he had lost Haldir’s love. “It was the only way.” Seeing Haldir’s 
skeptic look, he explained, “When Elrond is in pain, I am in pain. 
When he grieves, I grieve. When he begins to fade, I begin to fade. 
Reaffirming this bond was the only way to stop his grief from 
becoming worse and dragging me under with him. When he feels 
stronger, I feel stronger.”

Haldir finally understood. “You could no longer bear the pain.”

“I had the choice between continuing to live this half life or to submit 
to Elrond and empower him. By doing that, I empowering myself. I 
will endure the pain and humiliation of being claimed because it makes 
me stronger in the end.” Erestor hoped against all odds that Haldir 
understood why he had let Elrond take him. “But…”

“But what?” Haldir raised an eyebrow.

“I might have to do ‘it’ again in the future. I do not know if this one 
time was enough to strengthen Elrond sufficiently.”

Haldir gnashed his teeth at hearing that, recalling the state Elrond had 
left Erestor in millennia ago. “Let me check on you.”

“He was gentle this time,” said Erestor between clenched teeth. “He did 
not make me bleed.”

“I need to see for myself,” said Haldir determinedly. “I would not put it 
beyond you to play this down whilst you are hurting.”

Erestor knew better than to fight Haldir on this. “Then convince 
yourself.” Reminding himself that he trusted the silver-haired Elf 
unconditionally, he allowed Haldir to examine his lower body.

Haldir was relieved to find no blood clinging to Erestor’s thighs. 
“Erestor, I wish I could stay, but I have to return to camp.”

“Go, then,” whispered Erestor in understanding. “Galadriel may try to 
keep you away from me, but I carry you inside my heart.”

Touched by Erestor’s words, Haldir leaned in closer and brushed the 
raven-haired Elf’s already bruised lips. “Elrond had better be gentle 
with you. He will answer to me if he is not and I do not care if 
Galadriel approves of that or not. I promised to protect you.”

Erestor raised his right hand and caressed Haldir’s face. “I know you 
will always look out for me.”

Haldir regretted the fact that he had to leave, but after placing one last 
kiss on Erestor’s brow, he pushed himself to his feet and resolutely left 
the room. He would use every opportunity that presented itself to 
sneak back to Erestor.

Still feeling Haldir’s lips pressed against his brow, Erestor snuggled 
deeper beneath the blankets and quickly drifted off into reverie.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning, Galadriel visited with Elrond, as she was eager to 
find out if the half-Elf was improving. Her guard had reported to her 
that Erestor had gone to Elrond and had returned in a rather rumpled 
state, which led her to believe that he had kept his part of the bargain. 

“Good morning,” she said calmly, careful to hide her curiosity. 
Studying Elrond, she found that her son in law looked rumpled as well. 
He was constantly fussing over his bottom lip, which for some elusive 
reason was bleeding. But he did look better than when she had left him 
last night. 

“Good morning,” said Elrond slowly, blinking his eyes.

“You look troubled. Is anything amiss?” Galadriel seated herself next to 
the window from where she could effortlessly observe him. 

“Lots is amiss,” whispered Elrond absentmindedly. Should he confide in 
her? Could he? He had known her for millennia and she had become 
dear to him. In some ways he looked upon Celeborn and Galadriel as 
the parents he had never known. Elwing and Eärendil were only vague 
memories to him. 

“Then why do you not tell me?” suggested Galadriel carefully. “Maybe I 
can help?”

“I doubt it,” sighed Elrond, distressed. He looked over at her from 
where he was sitting on the bed. “I am at a loss to what happened last 
night.”

Galadriel raised an eyebrow and feigned ignorance. “What do you 
think happened, then?”

“I… I had a visitor.” Elrond frowned, shook his head, but failed to clear 
it from the cobwebs. “”Tis happened before… Three millennia ago.”

Galadriel knew she had to tread carefully. “What did? I hope you know 
you can tell me everything that troubles you. I will never betray your 
trust. You are very dear to me, Elrond.” So dear that she had sacrificed 
Erestor to keep him alive. 

“Someone made love to me last night…” Elrond blinked again. “At first 
I thought it was my wife, but the dark hair and masculine form led me 
to believe Ereinion had returned to me, so I dismissed it as a dream.”

“But?” Galadriel was growing worried. The potion should have led 
Elrond to believe it was Ereinion, his long lost lover, but it seemed the 
drug hadn’t been strong enough.

“It was not him. I know the way his body moves beneath me. This was 
a stranger and yet…”

“What?” Galadriel carefully hid her agitation. What had Erestor done? 
Had he found a way to manipulate her in turn?

“He was scared of me. I did not realize that at first, but he was not 
trembling due to passion, but because he was afraid of me. He…” 
Elrond strained his memory. “He begged me not to hurt him and to be 
gentle instead.”

“You had a very vivid dream, then,” said Galadriel, hoping to convince 
Elrond it had just been a dream.

“Nay, not a dream. And it was not a dream three millennia ago either.”

“And what leads you to that conclusion?”

“There was blood,” said Elrond, meeting her gaze, and wondering about 
the expression in those blue orbs. “Whoever made love with me was 
inexperienced and I tore him… badly. I still feel guilty for doing that to 
him. If only I knew who he was.”

“Probably someone who had learned of your grief for the High-King 
and wanted to take advantage of that. And last night most certainly was 
a dream. There are guards posted at your door and they would have 
alarmed us if there had been an intruder.” Galadriel rose from the chair 
and moved toward him. She rested a hand on his shoulder and then 
said, “It was a dream, Elrond, and nothing more.”

For some reason Elrond’s instincts kicked in, warning him not to object 
and he nodded, pretending to believe her. “Aye, it probably was just a 
dream.”

“Try to rest today,” said Galadriel as she made her way to the doorway. 
“When night falls, I will bring you more of that sleeping potion, but I 
will make it less potent this time.” 

Elrond watched her leave the room, and realized she was keeping 
something from him. He had known her long enough to read her like 
an open book. Now that a problem presented itself, he momentarily 
forgot about Celebrian. /I wonder what secret she is keeping./

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor had wrapped himself up in warm blankets and allowed 
Orophin to fuss over him. When the silver-haired Elf had joined him 
shortly after sunrise, Orophin had seemed shocked, finding him pale 
and skinny. Orophin hadn’t seen him for weeks as he had been out 
patrolling constantly.

“Erestor, you need to eat.” Orophin reached for Erestor’s thin fingers 
and wrapped them around the bowl of soup, which he had fetched 
from the kitchens. “You are not taking care of yourself.”

Erestor gave him a long, loving glance. “Why are you here, Orophin? 
You are tired yourself. You just returned from an exhausting patrol and 
should be sleeping instead.”

“I worry about you,” admitted Orophin in a soft tone. He cleared his 
throat and nervously shuffled his feet. “I heard Elrond Half-Elven is 
here.”

Erestor reluctantly sipped his soup, knowing Orophin wouldn’t leave 
him alone until he had eaten something. “You heard correctly, then.”

“Is it happening again?” asked the silver-haired sentry, unexpectedly 
probing Erestor’s chocolate eyes. “Did he hurt you again? Is that why 
you are… in this way?”

Sighing, Erestor realized he had to be honest with the sentry. 
“Orophin, you know I am bound to Elrond. Why are you asking these 
things when you already know the answer?”

“He did hurt you!” exclaimed Orophin, indignantly. 

Releasing another sigh, Erestor shook his head. “He did not hurt me. I 
went to him willingly.” /And I will allow him to bed me again tonight./ 
His connection to Elrond told him that the half-Elf still needed him. 
Hopefully, it would be the last time ever he had to submit to the 
Peredhel.

Orophin shook his head. “”Tis not fair.” 
 

Erestor agreed. “You are right; ‘tis not fair.” 

“What if…” Orophin was afraid to finish the sentence, not wanting to 
worry Erestor if the raven-haired Elf hadn’t thought about it himself.

“What if I conceive again?” finished Erestor for him. 

Orophin nodded, worried. “I saw the way you retreated into yourself 
when you lost them.”

“I do not know if I will survive losing another one. I pray to Elbereth I 
won’t conceive again.” But in the pit of his stomach, he felt queasy, 
afraid he was already pregnant. 

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine. 

Heart in Chains
Part 16


“You should drink this now,” advised Galadriel softly. “Then you will 
fall asleep within the hour.” She had returned to Elrond’s room when 
Ithil had appeared and was now trying to convince the half-Elf to drink 
the sleeping potion. 

“I will do so in a moment,” said Elrond, stretching slowly. The progress 
he had made since this morning was amazing. Gone were most of his 
negative emotions. Although he still longed to be reunited with 
Celebrian, the shattering grief had faded and instead curiosity had 
appeared. Except for Glorfindel, who had hovered close all day long -- 
and whom he had ignored -- everyone had left him alone. It had given 
him an opportunity to ponder everything that had happened last 
night… and *that* night three millennia ago. 

Someone had come to his room last night and had given himself to him. 
Now that he concentrated, he remembered the fears that had echoed in 
the other Elf’s voice and he flashed back to that night after the Battle of 
the Last Alliance. Back then he had been convinced Ereinion had 
returned to him, but the next morning cruel realization had set in. The 
blood that had clung to his flaccid member and the stained sheets had 
told him he had taken an inexperienced Elf, and had taken him hard, 
without proper preparation. Even three thousand years later, he still 
felt guilty for using someone in that way. 

Later, once he had regained his wits, he had questioned Glorfindel and 
Cirdan. They had told him about the healer’s visit and the next time he 
had met Celeborn and Galadriel, he had questioned them, but they had 
simply said that the healer had worked his art and that the rest had 
been due to his feverish dreams. /But there was blood. I did not 
imagine that./ Realizing they wouldn’t volunteer more information, he 
had stopped asking. 

Then last night had happened and now Galadriel was urging him to 
drink that sleeping potion again. Well, he wasn’t going to do it. “I 
appreciate it that you are taking care of me, Galadriel, and I am sure 
you will understand that I want to rest now. And aye, I will drink that 
sleeping potion you prepared.”

Realizing she was being dismissed, Galadriel had no other choice than 
to move toward the doorway. “I will see you in the morning, then.”

“Aye, you will.” Elrond waited for her to close the door behind her and 
then stared at the sleeping potion. “I want to know what this is all 
about and I won’t find out when drugged.” Elrond took hold of the 
crystal flask and emptied its content in the sink. He wanted to be clear-
headed should his mysterious Elf return tonight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Elrond had positioned himself in the center of his bed. His head rested 
on an arm, which he had folded beneath his brow, giving him an 
excellent view of the door. He hoped the dark-haired Elf would return 
tonight, for he wanted his questions answered. Elrond also realized he 
had to act carefully, and in order not to chase his visitor away, he 
would pretend to be drugged.

Long hours passed by until the door knob was finally turned and the 
door opened. Through the slits of his eyes, he carefully studied his 
mysterious visitor, who was wearing a long, black cloak, which hid his 
form and features. The other Elf seemed to briefly hesitate, but then 
closed the door softly behind him. Now that the other was advancing 
on him, the stranger dropped the cloak. The dark robes were next and 
Elrond’s eyes narrowed, seeing the too thin body. Long, dark hair 
danced against the other Elf’s lower back and large, chocolate eyes 
were afloat in a sea of blue. The paint briefly confused him, making it 
impossible for him to identify the Elf standing in front of him. When 
his visitor knelt on the bed, Elrond caught a hint of fear in the huge, 
doe-like eyes. /He is still afraid of me./ Remaining motionless, he 
waited for the other Elf to make his first move. 

“You seem better today. I worried about you. I am sorry that I am so 
weak and could not spare you more healing energy last night. I will try 
to do better tonight. Our last night together.”

Elrond stopped himself from frowning, hearing those words, which 
were uttered in a sad and abandoned tone. He wished he didn’t have to 
pretend being drugged, as for some reason he wanted to envelop the 
other in a tight hug.

“I had better get this over with. That way you can make a full recovery 
and return to your family, which will surely miss you.”

/He cares for me -- deeply --./ Elrond considered the way he had acted 
last night and knew he couldn’t deviate too much or else he would 
scare this caring soul away. He didn’t want to, but in the end, he 
whispered, “Ereinion, you are here again.” He caught the shivers that 
coursed through the raven-haired Elf’s body and realized he wanted to 
get to know this Elf, who for some reason continued to sneak into his 
bed. 

“Aye, I am here now, Elrond. You can let go. Take what you need from 
me.” 

Unexpectedly, a hand cupped the side of his face, rubbing gentle 
fingertips against his skin. Elrond briefly startled at the tingling 
sensation that now seeped into his skin, but when the energy surged 
through his body, he finally realized what was really going on. /He is a 
true healer and is giving me his life energy!/ But how was that possible? 
The few documented cases he had encountered had said that a tight 
bond was necessary between the healer and his patient for this to work. 
/Aiya, by the Grace of the Valar, he has been giving me –his patient – 
his life energy for how long? Did this really start three millennia? Does 
this mean…/ His thoughts raced! /Does this mean we are bound? But 
nay, I would know if I were bound to someone. No one would accept a 
half-formed bond; it would leave him weak as he cannot draw strength 
from me in turn./

Studying the other Elf, Elrond saw the gaunt features, sunken, dark-
rimmed eyes and the too thin body. /By Elbereth, is that what 
happened three millennia ago? Did he bind himself to me?/ It would 
explain the blood on his lips and the fact that they’d had intercourse. 
/But why would someone agree to such a half-life?/

“Elrond, is anything amiss?”

The raven-haired Elf sounded troubled, and Elrond suddenly realized 
what was wrong. /He expects me to claim him and thus reconfirm the 
bond./ If he didn’t make love to the other Elf, his mysterious stranger 
would realize something was wrong and flee. That was something he 
had to avoid at all cost. “Nothing is amiss. Everything is right now.” 
Elrond kept his eyes half-open, hoping to assure the other Elf that he 
was duly drugged. “Come here.” Reaching for the stranger, he pulled 
him atop of him. The confused look the other Elf gave him made it 
hard for him to pretend not noticing his distress. And his body reacted 
instinctively to having the other Elf close. He was quickly growing 
erect and he wanted to bury his visitor in a tight hug, which he 
promptly did. “I want to hold you… Ereinion,” he forced that name 
passed his teeth, when in reality he desperately wanted to know who 
he was holding in his arms. 

“Then hold me…” 

Elrond cocked his head and tried to keep his expression unfocused 
when he looked at the trembling Elf in his arms. When he tried hard, 
he could detect the other’s energy floating into his mind. Even now, 
the raven-haired Elf was strengthening him. /The healing bond is 
firmly in place. And it is old. Aye, it was created three millennia ago./ 
Running his hands down the shaking Elf’s back, he tried to soothe him. 
“I longed to hold you again.”
The stranger swallowed hard, and fascinated, Elrond watched his Adam 
’s apple bob nervously. “Shst, I am being gentle with you, am I not? Just 
as you requested last night.” 

“Aye, you were gentle with me. Thank you for that.” 

The other Elf’s nervousness now began to show clearly, as he shifted 
uncomfortably atop of him, clearly trying to avoid contact with his 
aroused flesh. In that moment Elrond realized another truth. “I want 
you.”

“I know you do. Take me, then. As you said last night, I am yours.”

Elrond was startled, briefly, realizing the other was dead serious. /Aye, 
the bond binds him to me. He is mine, but I am not his./ Elrond 
allowed for one hand to tangle in the dark mane. /His energy is flowing 
into my fëa, not leaving much behind to sustain him. He is in this 
weakened state because of me./ Curling his fingers around a strand of 
the other’s Elf’s hair, he gently forced him to lean in closer. Elrond 
claimed his lips, which tasted bittersweet and… salty? /He has been 
crying./ That seemed so wrong and he desperately wanted to soothe the 
other Elf’s pain away. “Trust yourself to me. I will be gentle.” 

The raven-haired Elf nodded shakily and Elrond proceeded to gently 
roll him onto his back. The long legs parted automatically and the thin 
fingers instantly clawed at the sheet. His bed partner was tense and 
rigid and the chocolate eyes closed, doubtlessly expecting pain. 
Knowing words wouldn’t reassure him, Elrond soothed with kisses 
instead. He started by exploring the sweet mouth, and the taste 
sparkled memories. He had tasted this raven-haired Elf before. /I was 
right all along./ It was a good thing that he hadn’t drunk Galadriel’s 
potion, for then he would never have fully realized the truth!

The mysterious Elf squirmed beneath him, but not due to passion. The 
doe-like eyes had reopened and revealed all fears. Elrond’s hands now 
joined in his effort to relax his bed partner. Gently, he explored all the 
area’s that made the other moan and found that the raven-haired grew 
erect when he licked the back of his knees. He could tell that the 
tension was slowly leaving the other Elf’s body and his partner was 
beginning to relax. “I will make this good for you.” He wanted to make 
it up to him for that first time, when he had hurt him so badly. 

Seeing the other Elf bite his bottom lip, he was reminded of the way his 
temporary lover had suckled his bottom lip until it had bled. He was 
passionate then, this trembling Elf. 

Elrond straddled the narrow hips and set to explore the other’s body in 
depth, taking his time. The hard nipples were a true delight to suckle 
and the raven-haired Elf reacted to this manipulation by raising his 
hips. /He does want this, but he is scared./ Elrond couldn’t blame him 
for being afraid, considering the way he had hurt his bed partner that 
first time. 

The large, dark eyes had closed again and his head was turned away. It 
was obvious his mysterious lover expected to be taken now, and taken 
hard. Elrond smiled sorrowfully, now that the other’s eyes were closed, 
and reached for the phial of oil that he had placed near his bed earlier. 
He had hoped – almost expected – the other to return to him tonight.  

He regretted having to stop rolling one hard nipple between his 
fingertips, but he had to remove the stopper. After letting a generous 
amount of oil flow into the palm of his hand, he wrapped his slick 
fingers around the other’s hard flesh. The chocolate eyes instantly 
opened and soft, begging groans escaped bruised lips. /I meant it when I 
said I was going to make this good for you./ Elrond stroked the hard 
flesh in his hand and blanketed the other Elf so he could reclaim those 
soft lips. 

Once he judged his partner was sufficiently relaxed, he removed his 
hand, added more oil and then crawled downward, until he could 
kneel between the other’s legs. He regretted that the large eyes had 
closed, but he respected that. Placing one finger near the tight entrance 
of the raven-haired Elf’s body, he began to gently massage the tense 
guardian ring. /I really must have hurt him that first time for him to be 
this tense now./ Leaning in closer, he continued the preparing massage, 
but now also showered the Elf’s inner thighs with light kisses, which 
drew soft moans. When he was finally convinced his partner was 
relaxing after all, he inserted his digit into the tight heat.

The raven-haired Elf emitted a pleading mew, but Elrond couldn’t be 
sure if it was because he needed more stimulation or if he was trying to 
make him stop. Instinctively, he cupped the other’s sac and rolled it 
through his palm, making him moan more loudly. Wriggling his digit 
inside the tight passage, he then removed it, added more oil and 
returned with two, which he slowly inserted. “There is no reason to be 
this tense. I won’t hurt you,” he said, hoping to reassure his mysterious 
lover.

But the dark eyes remained closed and the fingers continued to cling to 
the rumpled sheet. Sighing his disappointment, Elrond bowed down 
and licked at the slit, which was already slick with beads of pre-
ejaculate. /I won’t hurt you, I promise./ He just had to work harder to 
please his lover. Relaxing his throat, he took Erestor deeply. He ran his 
tongue along the length and suckled gently. The raven-haired Elf 
thrust unexpectedly and Elrond took that as a sign to add another 
finger. Moving them inside the warm glove, he carefully prepared his 
partner.

“Oh, what… are you…doing to me?”

Elrond grinned, let the aroused flesh slip from his mouth and blew 
gently at the enflamed head. 

“Aiya, you…”

His mysterious lover was now purring with pleasure and Elrond 
deemed the time ready to complete their union. Already positioned 
between the long legs, he guided them further apart and then began to 
inch inside, slowly. He had hoped the doe-like eyes would open again, 
but they didn’t. Instead the other’s brow grew knitted with 
concentration. Encountering resistance because his lover was still 
rather tense, he stopped regularly to allow him to adjust to the invasive 
feeling. “It will get better, I promise.” Once Elrond felt his partner relax 
further, he continued to bury himself in the tight passage until he was 
completely sheathed. Realizing the raven-haired Elf still expected to be 
badly hurt, he forced himself to remain motionless. “Please try to enjoy 
this. I want to pleasure you.” A nod from the dark-haired head told him 
the other had heard, but he doubted his temporary lover believed him. 
Aiming his first thrust, he smiled warmly, as his hard flesh nudged 
against the other’s prostate.

“Ai!” The eyes finally opened and stared at him in wonder. 

“I will take you with me…” Elrond set a gentle rhythm, making sure he 
continued to hit the sensitive gland inside his lover’s passage. Suddenly 
growing tired of the position they were in, Elrond pushed his arms 
beneath the Elf’s back, and began to pull him into an upright position. 
The confusion and surprise that shone back at him, made him smile. 
After guiding the long legs around his waist, he placed his lover’s arms 
around his neck. Supporting him, he waited for the dark-haired Elf to 
acquire a more comfortable position. Staring into the wide eyes, he 
gently thrust upwards, hoping the other Elf understood he could 
control the speed and depth of the thrusts if he wanted to. But sheer 
disbelief and confusion stared back at him and Elrond realized 
exercising control was the last thing on his partner’s mind. So he 
continued the slow and gentle rhythm, making sure he wasn’t thrusting 
too deeply as he didn’t want to hurt him. Slowly, building their orgasm, 
he took his lover to the edge. When warm cream splashed against his 
belly, and inner muscles contracted around him, Elrond let go as well. 
Involuntarily, he bit into his lover’s shoulder, then realized what he 
was doing and licked the small wound he had created. 

Clinging to his mysterious lover, he tightened his embrace and held 
him close. “Oh, my, that was…” Lost for words, Elrond guided the 
other Elf’s head onto his shoulder. He could sense the energy their 
lovemaking had created and was slightly shocked to feel it flow into his 
body and soul. /Not all of it. You need some to sustain yourself as well!/ 
But saying that would give him away and he remained silent instead. 
He could render this later, once he had found out this Elf’s identity. 

His sated member slipped out of the now slick passage and he tenderly 
laid his lover down, curling himself around him. “Rest now.” The thin 
body was shaking with tremors and Elrond soothingly stroked the long, 
damp hair. “You are safe with me.” 

A healing sleep was sneaking up on him, making it harder for Elrond to 
remain alert. Slowly, he drifted off into reverie, but he maintained his 
tight hold on the other Elf. His last thought before falling asleep was; /I 
will find out who you are and why you are doing this./

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Stunned and confused, Erestor reluctantly freed himself of Elrond’s 
comforting embrace. He would have loved to stay in those strong arms 
forever, but Elrond was not for him; Galadriel had made that very 
clear. 

Elrond… Elrond had taken him by surprise. They had really made love 
this time. He had expected more discomfort and soreness, but none of it 
had come to pass. His body tingled with pleasure, and when he sat on 
the side of the bed, even the soreness was absent. /So this is how 
making love feels?/ He decided he liked it and wished there was a way 
for him to stay close to Elrond and to make love to him again. 

/Nay, what is wrong with me for wanting that? Every time we make 
love I can conceive. I do not want to go through another pregnancy./ 
Elrond stirred beneath the blanket and Erestor reacted instinctively, 
soothing the half-Elf. A smile appeared on his face. “Thank you for 
giving me this. I will always cherish this memory, even when you were 
under the impression that you were making love to Ereinion.” No one 
could ever take this bittersweet memory away from him. 

After bestowing a last kiss on Elrond’s brow, he dressed and reluctantly 
left the room. “I would love to stay with you, but I cannot. You will 
never be mine and thinking that you are, would mean deluding 
myself.”

Opening the door, he looked over his shoulder at Elrond, who was 
peacefully asleep. “I wish you well and I hope your children are enough 
reason for you to pick up your life again.” Wishing he could have 
stayed in Elrond’s arms, he gingerly stepped into the corridor. His skin 
crawled, finding Galadriel there waiting for him. Erestor instantly 
lowered his gaze, not wanting to defy her in any way. “I did as you 
ordered. Elrond is now strong enough to make a complete recovery.”

“Excellent. I won’t be needing your… ‘services’ any more, then.” 

The way she spat the word at him made him feel cheap. /But I am not. 
Elrond is my bonded mate./ Forcing himself to reply, he said, “I will 
return to my talan, then.”

“Aye, stay clear from Elrond from this moment on. Now that he is on 
his way to recovery he needs to focus on himself and his family. That 
does not include you.”

Erestor’s eyes flared, enraged, but he made sure she didn’t see that 
expression. “As you wish.” Slowly, he shuffled away from her.

Once he was back in the safety of his rooms, he flung himself onto the 
bed, sobbing softly. His heart called out for Elrond and Haldir, but 
none of the Elves were close. 

He was alone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Celeborn had heard certain rumors, which he didn’t want to believe, 
and he had to convince himself that they weren’t true. So he sought out 
Erestor’s talan to talk to the dark-haired healer. “Erestor? May I enter?” 
He frowned, receiving strangled sobs for an answer and they urged him 
to open the door and enter.

Finding Erestor curled up on his bed and in tears, he quickly covered 
the distance that separated them. Uncertain what to do, he sat down on 
the side of the bed and reached out to stroke the long, dark hair. “Why 
are you weeping, Erestor?” He dreaded learning why.

“I do not know…” Erestor didn’t feel comfortable confiding in the Lord 
of the Golden Wood, not sure where Celeborn stood in this matter. 

Celeborn’s probing eyes scanned the trembling body and he growled 
softly encountering the bite mark. “’Tis true, then.”

Hearing Celeborn’s angry tone, Erestor forced himself to stop crying 
and to calm down. After a long minute, he pushed himself into an 
upright position and gingerly met Celeborn’s eyes. “What is?”

“She ordered you into his bed again.” He hissed the words passed 
clenched teeth. 

Erestor was growing tired of discussing this. “That is the way it is.”

Celeborn shook his head. “It should not be that way. I assume she 
drugged him before sending you to him?” He was well aware of his 
wife’s fondness of mixing potions. 

“Aye, so he would not recognize me. Not that it matters. Elrond thinks 
I am Ereinion when I am with him in that way.” Erestor shrugged his 
shoulders and instantly regretted it, as the bite burned slightly. 

“I will put a stop to this. She cannot continue to abuse you in this way!” 
 

Erestor smiled weakly, realizing he did have a friend in Celeborn. “Do 
not trouble yourself. Elrond is on his way to recovery and can do 
without my physical closeness.”

“That does not matter,” said Celeborn determinedly. “Galadriel has to 
stop hurting you!” 

“Thank you for caring, my Lord.”

Celeborn felt like he had failed Erestor, and wished there was a way he 
could help the hurting Elf right now. He would speak with Galadriel 
later. “Is there anything I can do…?” He let his voice trail off.

“Actually… there is,” whispered Erestor uncertainly. But could he 
actually ask the Lord of the Golden Wood ‘that’?

“What is it?” Celeborn inched closer to Erestor, noticing the bruised 
lips. 

“Would you stay here tonight? I do not want to be alone and with 
Haldir and his brothers out on patrol, I do not have anyone I can ask…” 
He didn’t want to bother Camfael, fearing the healer’s reaction when 
he found out about him going to Elrond’s  bed willingly.

“I will stay,” promised Celeborn softly. “Know I will keep you safe. 
Rest, then.” Seeing Erestor’s wavering expression he realized what the 
dark-haired was *really* asking him. “Move over, Erestor.”

Erestor swallowed hard, realizing Celeborn was actually going to do 
this. He moved over and watched as the Lord of the Golden Wood 
stretched beside him. 
 
Celeborn raised an arm, signaling for Erestor to move even closer. 

Lying face to face, Erestor complied and rested his cheek on Celeborn’s 
shoulder. “Thank you.” He needed to feel someone close, someone 
holding him and maybe, in his dreams, he could pretend it was Elrond 
holding him. 

“You are welcome,” mumbled Celeborn, worried about Erestor’s fragile 
state. Completing the embrace, he hugged the dark-haired Elf close. 
“Sleep now.”

“Thank…you,” whispered Erestor, already falling asleep. Elrond had 
exhausted him. 

Celeborn listened closely as Erestor’s breathing deepened and then 
evened out. He had to find a way to get Erestor away from Galadriel. 
She would never stop using him as she saw fit. /Maybe I can send 
Erestor to Imladris. Elrond is always eager to take in new healers./ At 
least in that way Erestor would be close to his mate.

Celeborn rubbed Erestor’s back, whilst his other hand rested on the 
sleeping Elf’s hip. A startling thought suddenly occurred to him. /What 
if he is with child again? What do I do, then?/ The more he thought 
about all possible scenarios, the more convinced he became that he had 
to get Erestor away from Galadriel. “I will find a way,” he vowed 
privately. If Erestor had truly conceived again, he would make sure 
there was no second miscarriage.

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine. 

Heart in Chains
Part 17


“Glorfindel!” 

Elrond roared loudly and the blond Elda quickly marched into the 
room. Yesterday, Elrond had ignored him and now the half-Elf was 
calling out for him? “Aye, I am here!” Panting slightly because he had 
been running, he stared at his old friend. 

“Where were you last night?” Elrond, dressed in brown robes, glared at 
his friend. 

“Some of the Galadhrim asked me to join them and I accepted, as you 
seemed irritated by my presence.” Glorfindel frowned, wondering what 
this was about. And ouch, was he reading the warning signs right? Was 
Elrond going to have one of his famous tantrums? But why? 

“You should have been guarding my rooms!” Elrond impatiently paced 
the room, wondering how he was ever going to find out his visitor’s 
identity. His mysterious lover had left during the night, leaving him 
alone in his bed. When he had woken and reached for him, he had 
only encountered a pillow. 

“Did something happen I am not aware of?” Stunned, Glorfindel 
involuntarily held his breath when Elrond wildly moved his hands.

“Did something happen? Did something happen? Glorfindel!” 
Frustrated, Elrond came to a standstill in front of the Balrog Slayer and 
rested his hands on the other Elf’s shoulders, shaking him slightly. “Do 
you remember that night three thousand years ago when that healer 
visited with me?”

If Glorfindel was surprised by the change in topic, he didn’t show it. 
“Of course I remember.” Like Elrond, he had always wondered about 
that healer. When the half-Elf had told him what had happened that 
night, he had dismissed it at first. Elrond had seemed disorientated to 
him, but when the half-Elf had shown him the bloodstained sheets, he 
had begun to believe him. “What about him?”

“He was here for the last two nights, and do not dare tell me I imagined 
it. Look at me! Three days ago I was grieving heavily, nearly fading and 
now…”

Glorfindel couldn’t deny the change in Elrond. He had seen it three 
millennia ago as well. “He was here, then?” Now he was beginning to 
understand why Elrond was upset. “And you want me to locate him for 
you?”

“I wanted you to keep him from leaving last night! Aiya, Glorfindel, 
you have no idea what is really going on!”

“Then why do you not enlighten me?”

Elrond sighed, distressed, released Glorfindel and sat down on the bed, 
recalling last night’s tender ministrations. “This Elf is a naturally gifted 
healer. He draws his power from deep within himself. It took me a 
while to figure this out, but I understand now. He formed a healing 
bond with me, and I have been absorbing his life energy ever since. It is 
the reason why I recovered so quickly back then and why I am no 
longer in any emotional pain now. Even at this very moment, he is 
sustaining me.”

Glorfindel raised an eyebrow questioningly. “Let us assume you are 
right…” He paused to placate Elrond, seeing the half-Elf’s furious 
expression. “And I have no reason to assume you are wrong, then 
where is your savior now? Why leave? If he is bound to you, being in 
your vicinity would make things much easier. Why disappear?” 

Elrond nodded once. “I asked myself the same questions. I do not 
believe he left voluntarily. Last night was… pure bliss.” He blushed 
weakly, seeing Glorfindel’s knowing expression. “Do not worry, I was 
careful this time.”

Glorfindel swallowed hard. “How much do you remember of last 
night?”

“Everything, as I did not drink Galadriel’s sleeping potion.” Elrond 
cupped his chin in his hand after resting his elbow on his knee, 
pondering his problems. “I am certain Galadriel is involved somehow.”

Glorfindel moistened his lips, pulled up a chair and sat down opposite 
the half-Elf. He recalled her words as well. “Millennia ago she said you 
had imagined being with him in that way because you were feverish.”

“But that never explained the blood. I know this really happened!”

“Peace, mellon, I believe you.” Glorfindel rested a hand on Elrond’s 
knee in an effort to calm him. “Maybe you should ask Celeborn 
instead?”

“Celeborn would not tell me anything either.”

“Maybe he has changed his mind since then?” suggested Glorfindel, 
wishing he could help Elrond to solve this problem.

“At least now I know *he* is here. Glorfindel, you have to find him for 
me!” Elrond enthusiastically nodded his head. 

“How, meldir?” Glorfindel hated disappointing Elrond. “How do I find 
an Elf I know nothing about? Galadriel and Celeborn might have taken 
measures to ensure we never find him.”

Elrond’s eyes darkened with misery. “Will you at least try?”

Glorfindel nodded once. “I will do my best.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Celeborn eyed his wife closely. Galadriel was humming softly, whilst 
weaving. She looked deceitfully like the woman he had fallen in love 
with, but he knew better now. “I talked to Erestor last night.”

Galadriel’s hands froze and her gaze searched Celeborn’s, but she didn’t 
say a single word.

“It has to stop, Galadriel,” said Celeborn resolutely. “I won’t allow you 
to hurt him any more.”

Instead of arguing with him, she simply returned to her weaving. The 
lack of a reaction on her part made him shiver, wondering if she had 
heard him at all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“My Lord? I bring a message from your children.” The Noldorin 
messenger had left Imladris several days ago and had hurried here to 
deliver his message. He now handed Elrond the letter, noticing that his 
ruler’s condition had improved.

Elrond unfolded the letter and began reading it. 

Glorfindel entered the room, dismissed the messenger for now and 
joined Elrond. “Good news or bad?”

“My children want me to return home,” mumbled Elrond after reading 
the letter. “They miss me and need me.” 

“I understand that,” said Glorfindel in a soothing tone. “They lost their 
mother and when you left, they felt as if they were losing their father 
as well. If I were to advise you, I would tell you to go home as quickly 
as possible. Then, you can mourn as a family.”

“You speak wisely,” admitted Elrond, “but…”

Glorfindel nodded. “I made inquiries about your mysterious Elf, but no 
one will talk to me about him. I only met with stony silence.”

Elrond sighed, sorrowfully. “So I will never find out who he is and why 
he is sharing his life energy with me.” 

“I am afraid so. Maybe it is best to let the matter rest for now and make 
inquiries when no one expects it.” 

“Again, your council is sound.” Elrond was determined not to give up. 
He would place spies in Lothlorien, telling them to gather information 
about this healer for him. Now that Galadriel and Celeborn didn’t want 
to tell him, he had to take matters into his own hands.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Erestor? Are you sure you want to watch this?” Rumil was the first 
brother to return from their lengthy patrol and the silver-haired Elf 
had hurried to him at once. Orophin and Haldir had told him what had 
happened these last few days and he shared their concern for Erestor’s 
well-being. 

“I am sure.” Erestor, dressed in black robes, watched the Imladris’ party 
leave. Elrond had mounted his stallion, looking much improved. The 
stormy eyes burned with life and his jaw was set determinedly. “He 
will survive.”

“I am sure he will,” said Rumil, with barely concealed disapproval in 
his eyes. “I am more concerned about you than Elrond.”

Erestor gave him a warm smile and patted the sentry’s arm. “Thank 
you.”

Rumil returned the smile and then joined Erestor in looking outside. 
Glorfindel had mounted Asfaloth and the party was now moving away 
from the talan. Hearing Erestor groan softly beside him, Rumil gave the 
dark-haired Elf a concerned look. 

“The distance between us is growing and I feel the loss,” explained 
Erestor in a sad tone, now that the party was making speed. Within 
minutes, they had disappeared from view. “I wish I could have stayed 
with him.”

Rumil knew about Haldir’s complicated relationship with Erestor and 
hoped his older brother wouldn’t end up being hurt. “You are in love 
with Elrond.”

Erestor swallowed, nervously meeting Rumil’s knowing eyes. “I would 
never willingly hurt Haldir’s feelings. I greatly care about him.”

Rumil nodded. “But you did not answer my question.”

“My fëa is entangled with Elrond’s,” said Erestor thoughtfully. “I am 
connected to him and to some degree I love him.” Even when he had 
minded the twins when they had been babies, he had cared about 
Elrond and Elros. But the feelings were deepening after last night. “It is 
a tangled web.”

Rumil reassuringly squeezed Erestor’s shoulder. “What will you do now 
that Elrond has left for Imladris?”

“I will go back to studying with master Camfael,” replied Erestor 
slowly, “And maybe the three of you will continue to keep me 
company?”

“Of course we will!” Rumil used his hold on Erestor’s shoulder to guide 
the other Elf to the table. “Sit down,” he said, piling food onto the 
plate, which he then placed in front of Erestor. “You are too thin. Eat.”

Erestor giggled briefly. “Aye, nana.”

Rumil tried to shoot Erestor an irritated look, but failed and giggled as 
well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Camfael monitored Erestor closely, once his student had confided in 
him about the intimacy that had taken place between Elrond and he. 
Erestor had also told him that he was worried he had conceived again 
and could be pregnant. When Erestor had told him that, the dark-
haired Elf had trembled like a leaf and fear had shone from the dark 
eyes. He was now determined to make sure Erestor was well cared for 
and watched out for any signs that could indicate a pregnancy.

He hoped Erestor wasn’t pregnant, as he was afraid for the Elf’s 
emotional balance. They had nearly lost Erestor when he had suffered 
that miscarriage and he wasn’t going to take any risks now. His 
alertness paid off, hearing Erestor’s dry heaving coming from the 
bathroom. Erestor would study with him today and he had come to the 
Elf’s room to accompany him to the library where the books on herb 
lore were kept. 

Camfael hurried into the bathroom and his heart ached, seeing Erestor 
fight down his dry heaves. “Don’t. Don’t fight it. Just let it happen.” He 
gathered the long, damp strands of hair in his hand and steadied 
Erestor. 

Erestor’s eyes had filled with tears of misery, glancing at the healer. He 
had to ride out the dry heaves and when they finally stopped, he sagged 
against Camfael.

Camfael caught him and supported him. “Rinse your mouth, my 
friend.” His arms remained locked around Erestor’s waist whilst the 
dark-haired Elf rinsed his mouth. “Come, you need to sit down.” 
Slowly, he guided Erestor back into the room, where he sat his charge 
down on the bed. 

Tears now freely flowed down Erestor’s face. “’Tis happening again. 
May Nienna help me carry this burden.” He had tried to deny what his 
body had been telling him these last few days, but the nausea had 
finally caught up with him. “I am with child.” He rested his head 
against Camfael’s shoulder, now that the healer had seated himself on 
the bed beside him. “What do I do now?”

Camfael sighed, as he had been asking himself the same question. 
Elrond had visited Lothlorien four months ago, so Erestor’s pregnancy 
wasn’t that advanced yet. “I will take good care of you.”

“What if I lose this one as well?” Erestor rocked himself against 
Camfael, who had no other choice than to move with him. 

“You won’t lose your baby.”

Celeborn’s voice took both Elves aback. Erestor startled momentarily, 
pushed himself away from Camfael’s comforting presence and tried to 
compose himself. “My Lord…?”

“I heard what was said,” whispered Celeborn in a thoughtful tone, 
closely studying Erestor. The raven-haired Elf had never regained the 
weight after aiding Elrond and had remained too thin. Although 
Haldir, his brothers, Camfael and he tried to look after Erestor, they 
still felt they weren’t doing enough. “You are pregnant again. In your 
fourth month, I reckon?”

Erestor bit his bottom lip and nodded. “Aye, my Lord.”

“We will take all necessary precautions,” said Celeborn firmly. “And 
leave Galadriel to me.”

Erestor carefully probed Celeborn’s eyes and found them sincere. “You 
will make sure my baby will be all right?”

Celeborn walked toward him and came to a standstill in front of the 
pregnant Elf. “I vow to do everything I can to ensure your child is born 
healthy.”

Erestor felt somewhat reassured, hearing that. “Thank you.”

Celeborn smiled warmly at Erestor and then wrapped an arm around 
him. “Why do you not lie down for a while? I need to discuss this with 
Camfael.”

Erestor was happy to let them worry about his baby’s safety and 
lowered himself onto the bed. He allowed Celeborn to cover him with 
a blanket and then closed his eyes, trying to shut out their presence. 
Right now, he wished Elrond were here to share this news with him. 

“Camfael, walk with me.” After making sure that Erestor was all right 
for now, Celeborn signaled for the healer to join him. The two of them 
moved into the corridor and then headed for the lake, knowing they 
would have some privacy there. “What are the odds that Erestor will 
suffer another miscarriage?” asked Celeborn. Although Erestor’s 
pregnancy didn’t come to him as a shock, he still felt uneasy with the 
whole situation. 

“If Galadriel leaves him alone?” 

Celeborn sighed, understanding the point Camfael was making. “I tried 
to stop her. I even forbade her to use Erestor to heal Elrond’s pain, but 
she went ahead at any rate. I must admit I no longer have any influence 
on her.”

“In that case, I think there is a very real possibility that Erestor will lose 
this child.” 

Celeborn frowned, wondering how to keep Erestor out of his wife’s 
reach. “Erestor is still in the early stages of his pregnancy. How much 
longer can we hide his condition?”

Camfael shrugged. “Maybe another two months, but he will start to 
show by then.”

“And he lost the twins when he was almost nine months pregnant. This 
will be a very stressful time for him.”

“My Lord? May I make a suggestion?”

“Of course.” Celeborn looked at his healer expectantly. 

“Send him to Imladris. Send him to Elrond.” 

“That idea crossed my mind as well,” admitted Celeborn. “It would be 
best for both of them; Erestor and the child.”

“But you are afraid Galadriel will manage to stop us.”

Celeborn nodded once. “We might have to do this behind her back. 
Once she learns Erestor is in Imladris there is little she can do to 
change that.”

“And you might want to send Haldir with Erestor,” suggested Camfael. 
“Haldir is the only one Erestor trusts completely and he will need a 
friendly face when he is among strangers.”

“Arranging this will take time.” Celeborn had to contact Elrond to 
request the half-Elf take on the responsibility for Erestor’s care and 
inform him of the Elf’s pregnancy. Should he also tell Elrond that he 
had fathered this child? But he could worry about that later. First he 
had to dispatch a messenger to Imladris. “I will keep you informed.”

“You have made the right decision,” said Camfael in a grateful tone. 
“When do we tell Erestor?”

“Once I receive word from Elrond. I do not want to give Erestor false 
hope. Haldir and he will probably have to sneak out of Lothlorien 
whilst I distract my wife.”

Camfael smiled warmly at Celeborn. “I must say I am honored to be 
your friend, my Lord.” He had hoped Celeborn would eventually 
become Erestor’s champion and the Lord of the Golden Wood hadn’t 
disappointed him after all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor felt warm. It was rather hot today and he was filling up his 
bathtub with tepid water. He would have preferred ice-cold water, but 
didn’t want to expose his baby to such cold. He was five months 
pregnant now and the nausea still sent him into the bathroom every 
morning. Now he was also experiencing cramps and he had never been 
happier to have several Elves who cared for him. 

When Haldir had found out, the silver-haired Elf’s reaction had been 
mixed. He had expressed his worries first, then his joy and in the end, 
he had vowed to protect him and the child until his last breath.

Rumil and Orophin had reacted in similar ways and their fussing had 
grown even worse. Getting away from their concerned eyes was 
becoming harder, but he had finally managed to get a moment for 
himself. After removing his clothes, he carefully sat down in the tub, 
letting the water caress his body. He rested his right hand on his 
stomach, which was slightly distended. Only someone who knew he 
was with child would realize why the tummy was there. “I promise 
you, little one. If you die, I will die with you.” He would not go on 
living if he lost this child as well. 

“Erestor?” Haldir peeked into the room and smiled upon seeing 
Erestor’s shy blush. “I had the feeling I might find you here.” He closed 
the door behind him and walked over to the bathtub. He knelt behind 
the tub and began to massage the tense shoulders. 

Erestor relaxed, enjoying the massage. “Would you do my feet too?”

“Your feet?” Haldir laughed warmly. “Aye, I will also do your feet.”

Erestor smiled shyly. “I cannot help it. They are cramped up.”

“And you are only five months pregnant! Things will get worse 
before…” Haldir abruptly stopped talking, as the smile had faded from 
Erestor’s face. “Nay, things won’t get worse, I promise you. What I was 
trying to say is—“

“I know what you are trying to say,” said Erestor, composing himself. 
Haldir’s words had caught him off guard and suddenly the worst 
possible scenario had appeared to him: losing his baby. 

“You will get food cravings, even more cramps, you will feel bloated, 
tired—“ Haldir made sure his voice carried a teasing tone. 

“Haldir, stop it!” Erestor managed a weak smile. “I know what to 
expect.”

“And let us not forgot those mood swings!” Haldir was relieved to see 
that the smile had made a comeback on Erestor’s face. He rose from the 
floor and moved to the foot end of the tub. “So, they are cramped up?”

“Aye.” Erestor loved Haldir for doing this for him and smiled fondly at 
the march warden whilst sticking one foot out of the water. “Do that 
one first?”

“Cramps are worse in this one?” 

“Aye.” Erestor sighed when Haldir’s fingers began to work their magic 
on his cramped up limb. “’Tis divine. What would I do without you, 
Haldir?”

Haldir reached for Erestor’s other foot and massaged them 
simultaneously. He knew he was doing it right, hearing Erestor purr his 
contentment. But now the tricky part had arrived. How was he to tell 
Erestor of their plan? Camfael and Celeborn hadn’t confided in Erestor 
yet and had asked him to inform the pregnant Elf of their impending 
departure.

“Haldir? You are brooding.” And Erestor didn’t like that. It usually 
meant Haldir was worried, worried about him. 

“Aye, I am.” Haldir gently lowered the no longer cramped up limbs 
back into the water and pulled up a chair, sitting down beside the 
bathtub.

Erestor saw the serious expression in Haldir’s hazel eyes and his worry 
increased. “What is wrong? What did Galadriel order this time?” 
Instinctively, he reached for Haldir’s hand, uncaring he was splashing 
the march warden’s clothes with water. 

Haldir drew in a deep breath. “I would not say anything is wrong. But 
there will be some changes.”

“Changes?” Erestor’s eyes widened worriedly. 

“Celeborn has arranged for you to travel to Imladris. We are leaving 
tonight.” Haldir held his breath, wondering what Erestor’s reaction 
would be like.

“What?” Mouth agape, Erestor stared at Haldir. He must have 
misheard!

“Celeborn is concerned about you and he is determined to make sure 
you deliver this child. Therefore, he has decided to send you to Elrond, 
as the Peredhel is best suited to deal with this, being a healer himself.”

“I… do not… understand.” Erestor blinked in confusion. Haldir 
couldn’t be serious!

“Celeborn has ordered my brothers and I to take you to Imladris. Rumil 
and Orophin will return once we reach Imladris safely, but I will stay 
with you. You won’t be alone, lirimaer.” Haldir wondered about the 
terrified expression in Erestor’s eyes. “I thought you would like this 
idea.”

“I…” Erestor cleared his throat, trying to speak past the lump of 
emotions that had gathered there. “So I am supposed to stay until the 
baby has been born and then I am to return here?”

Haldir shook his head. “Celeborn wants you to stay in Imladris. He 
fears Galadriel will one day cause your death and he wants to prevent 
that.”

“And Elrond?” Erestor still had trouble understanding what was about 
to happen.

“Celeborn sent Elrond a message, telling him that he is worried about a 
pregnant male Elf. He did not tell Elrond who you are or what you did, 
just that he is afraid you will suffer another miscarriage. Elrond agreed 
to take you in and supervise your pregnancy.”

“So Elrond does not know I am carrying his child,” asked Erestor, 
making sure he understood.

“You will be his patient, nothing more.” But Haldir hoped Elrond 
would come to care for Erestor. Haldir loved Erestor enough to put the 
other Elf’s happiness first. And maybe, he would play matchmaker.

“And we will leave this evening?” Erestor nervously squirmed in the 
water. He desperately wanted Elrond close, but at the same time he was 
afraid that the half-Elf wouldn’t like him and he wasn’t sure he could 
deal with rejection in his current state.

“We will leave once Ithil rises.” Haldir patted Erestor’s hand in a way 
that he hoped was reassuring. “I will protect you and the baby, you 
know that.”

“I do,” said Erestor, nodding once.

“Camfael wants to examine you one last time, so do not forgot to see 
him before we leave.” Haldir leaned in closer and pressed a kiss on top 
of the wet hair. “You are not alone. Always remember that.”

Erestor swallowed hard and stared into Haldir’s honest eyes. “I will 
try.”

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine. 

Heart in Chains
Part 18



“Did you lose your wits, Haldir? How can you want me to ride *that*?” 
Erestor stared in shock at the big, black stallion standing proudly in 
front of him, eyeing him with alert, dark eyes. Long powerful legs and 
a well-muscled chest only added to Erestor’s reluctance to mount the 
horse. If the stallion threw him off he would most certainly suffer 
another miscarriage and he didn’t want to do anything to endanger his 
unborn child. “You cannot be serious!”

“Keep your voice down, lirimaer,” said Haldir, quickly wrapping an 
arm around Erestor. They were standing in a secluded part of the wood 
and were getting ready for departure. Celeborn had promised to 
distract Galadriel long enough for them to escape Lothlorien. But now 
it seemed Erestor was reluctant to comply. 

“Listen to me,” started Haldir, holding Erestor’s apprehensive gaze. 
“This is Tirith (Vigilance). This horse was trained by Celeborn 
personally. He has learned to protect his rider and will be extremely 
careful with you. He won’t throw you off or endanger you in any other 
way. The very opposite is true. If we were to encounter an enemy he 
would sacrifice himself for you.”

Erestor blinked, taking in all this new information and then stared at 
the stallion again. The dark eyes showed intelligence and the animal 
was studying him in turn. 

Haldir, reading Erestor’s reluctant agreement in his chocolate eyes, 
guided the dark-haired Elf closer to Tirith. “Pat him. He likes being 
stroked on his nose.”

“I have not been around horses much,” explained Erestor gingerly. “I 
never learned to properly ride them, and now with this little one to 
protect I cannot help being cautious.” Gently, he rubbed the warm 
nose. “Haldir? I visited with Camfael and he examined me. He thinks I 
am pregnant with only one child. Not twins.”

Haldir was relieved. Carrying twins would have made this even harder 
for Erestor, who was still afraid that history was repeating itself. “Only 
one child, then.”

“Aye.” Erestor sighed, distressed. “Do you really want me to mount 
him?”

“Aye, and we will help you.” Haldir signaled for Rumil to help him and 
together they managed to get Erestor into the saddle. Tirith remained 
motionless, instinctively sensing that something was wrong with his 
charge. The stallion was determined to be very careful around this 
dark-haired Elf.

Erestor felt awkward, suddenly finding himself high in the air. Looking 
down at Haldir, he wondered why they hadn’t given him a docile mare 
instead. 

Haldir signaled for his brothers to mount, and Erestor was about to 
hand the reins of his horse to Rumil, like he had done three thousand 
years ago. 

“Nay, you keep them,” said Rumil with an unreadable expression on his 
face. He was fighting fierce emotions, being reminded of the moment 
when Orophin had disappeared into that crevice. If it hadn’t been for 
Erestor, they would have lost their brother that day. Seeing Erestor’s 
wondering expression, Rumil added softly, “You are not a prisoner any 
more, Erestor.”

Erestor blinked, hearing those words. He wasn’t?

Haldir felt he had to explain. He guided his horse next to Tirith, and 
once they were moving, he said, “Celeborn does not want to keep you 
here against your will.”

“But Galadriel does,” whispered Erestor knowingly. Then, he shrugged 
his shoulders once. “It does not really matter. I do not have a place to 
go if I were allowed to leave. But Imladris should be better than 
Lothlorien, at least I hope so.” His eyes darkened with worry and his 
fingers clawed at the leather of the saddle. They were riding at a slow 
pace, which surprised him. “Should we not speed up?”

Orophin cleared his throat. He was riding behind Erestor and had 
overheard the question. “You are nearly six months pregnant, Erestor. 
We won’t run you rugged to get you to Imladris a day early.”

“Then traveling there will take us two weeks at least,” said Erestor 
softly. 

“Does it matter?” questioned Haldir. “I thought you would enjoy being 
in the open and having our pleasant company.” The stunning smile that 
Erestor gave him made his heart expand in his chest. Erestor seemed 
truly happy that moment and he was determined to keep it that way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“He is asleep,” whispered Rumil. They had traveled for most of the 
night, and now that Arien was about to rise, it was time to make camp. 
The cover of night had ensured their unnoticed departure from 
Lothlorien, and as no one had tried to stop them, they reckoned their 
flight had been successful. “We should make camp.”

Haldir nodded. “I will look after Erestor. Rumil, make camp. Orophin, 
scout ahead and make sure we are secure here.” The two brothers 
began to carry out their assigned tasks whilst Haldir dismounted and 
then lifted Erestor out of the saddle. The pregnant Elf stirred, but did 
not wake up. 

After carrying Erestor over to the spot Rumil had selected to set up 
camp, he placed Erestor on the blanket his brother had spread over the 
ground. Erestor’s eyes unexpectedly regained their alertness and looked 
questioningly at the march warden. “You are safe, lirimaer. Go back to 
sleep. You need the rest.”

Erestor nodded absentmindedly and then curled up on the blanket, 
whilst holding Haldir’s hand in his, making sure his protector couldn’t 
leave. 

Haldir smiled dotingly and gave in, settling down beside Erestor. 
Stroking the dark hair with his other hand, he watched him sleep.

Rumil sat down beside him and began building a small fire. “What do 
you think will happen when we arrive in Imladris?”

“His heart will feel lighter for then he will be close to Elrond.” Haldir 
gave his brother a meaningful look. “Think about it, Rumil. Elrond is 
without a mate and Erestor is already bound to him. I will do my best 
to get them together.”

“Even when that means losing Erestor?”

“Rumil, I cannot lose what I never had. Erestor and I lived in borrowed 
time. We knew it would not last.” Now that he had said the words, he 
smiled weakly. “I am grateful for his trust and love though. They mean 
more to me than he will ever realize. I should have guarded my heart 
better, but he slipped past all defenses.”

Rumil nodded once. “I know what you mean. I greatly care for him as 
well. At times, it feels like it is the four of us, instead of just the three. 
He has become like a brother to me. Orophin feels the same way.”

A comfortable silence settled over them. Rumil tended to the fire and 
Haldir continued to stroke Erestor’s hair.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I apologize for falling asleep,” whispered Erestor guiltily. “It was not 
my intention.”

“We understand,” said Orophin soothingly. Haldir had relieved him 
and was now standing watch, whilst Rumil was reheating the remnants 
of the game Orophin had caught when hunting. “A pregnancy is very 
taxing.”

Relieved they understood, Erestor accepted the bowl of food Rumil 
handed him and began to eat. He was surprisingly hungry and emptied 
the bowl quickly. His stomach growled loudly, demanding more food 
and he gave the two brothers an apologetic look. “’Tis the little one 
who wants more.”

Rumil reached into his well-filled saddlebags and uncovered a sweet 
cake one of the cooks had prepared at his request. “I think this will fill 
your stomach satisfactorily.” 

Erestor adoringly stared at the cake, smelling the honey and sugars in 
it. “May I?”

Rumil cut him a generous part, put it in his bowl, and then watched 
Erestor devour it. It was a good thing another cake was tucked away in 
Orophin’s saddlebag!

Erestor became aware of the fact that the two brothers were smiling at 
him, as he pushed the sweet cake into his mouth. “Are you not going to 
try it?”

“I had it made for you especially,” replied Rumil, smiling warmly. “But 
we might try it before reaching Imladris… if something is still left of it 
by then.”

Erestor blushed weakly, but finished the cake at any rate. “And now 
what?” Arien was beginning to shine stronger.

“Now we rest. Let us go over there.” Rumil pointed out the temporary 
shelter he had built, made from branches, leaves and blankets he had 
brought along. “It will provide you with the necessary cover.”

“And what about you?” Erestor didn’t like the extra care they were 
giving him. It made him feel like a burden.

Orophin realized that and acted quickly. “We will join you.” Haldir 
was standing watch and would warn them if anything was afoot. Also, 
the shelter was big enough to hold more than one.

“Lie down,” said Rumil, assisting Erestor in lying down on his side. 
Then he spooned up behind the dark-haired Elf, who tensed 
unexpectedly, and Orophin lay down face to face with Erestor. Both 
brothers reacted instinctively, folding one arm around Erestor’s waist. 

“May I?” asked Orophin, as his hand hovered above Erestor’s abdomen. 

Shyly, Erestor nodded. “But do not expect to feel much. The little one 
has not begun kicking yet.” But that would happen within the month. 
At least the twins had kicked when he was half-term. He guided 
Orophin’s hand past his robes and placed the palm against his 
abdomen. The unconditional trust that he felt toward Haldir had long 
ago been expanded to include Rumil and Orophin. He trusted the three 
brothers. 

Orophin’s eyes widened, feeling the slight distension beneath his 
fingertips. At that moment, Erestor’s pregnancy became very real to 
him. Like Haldir, he realized that instant that Erestor’s destiny lay with 
the baby’s father; Elrond. “Do you have any idea what gender the child 
will be?” Erestor had been right the last time, when he had been 
convinced he was expecting two boys.

Erestor’s blush made a return, feeling Orophin’s fingertips tenderly 
stroke his abdomen. “It feels different this time. I think this little one is 
female.”

“A girl? A daughter!” called Rumil out in delight. 

“I think so,” said Erestor, who was beginning to grow uncomfortable, 
being the center of attention. “But first she has to be born and I am 
afraid to think of any complications.”

“Complications?” Orophin, who was face to face with Erestor, saw the 
distress in the large, chocolate eyes.

“Camfael said there was scar tissue from the… miscarriage… and the 
baby has less room than the twins had. And then there is the birth. 
Elrond will have to open my abdomen for the child to be born.”

“A very frightening concept, indeed,” said Rumil, stroking Erestor’s 
back soothingly. “But you are strong. You are a survivor and you will 
see this one grow up.”

“I hope so.” Erestor closed his eyes, unable to say this when looking at 
Orophin. “I vowed to die with my child, should I lose this little one.”

“Aiya,” whimpered Rumil. “Do not say such things. We do not want to 
lose you. *Haldir* does not want to lose you.”

“And I do not want to leave him behind,” admitted Erestor, who 
gingerly opened his eyes to look at Rumil over his shoulder. “But I 
doubt I will survive losing another one.”

“In that case we will have to make sure you won’t lose your baby.” 
Rumil exchanged a determined look with Orophin. They would tell 
Haldir of Erestor’s admission, knowing their brother would make sure 
Erestor stayed with them, even if the baby died unexpectedly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Seated on Tirith’s back, Erestor easily spotted the small lake to their 
right. The calm water reflected Ithil’s silver beams and Erestor wanted 
nothing more than to wade into the cool water and clean himself up. 
That morning, when Haldir had returned from his watch, he had 
teasingly remarked he wished they had brought along the bathtub. 
Haldir had smiled at hearing that, reminding him he could take all the 
baths he ever wanted once they were in Imladris. But now that he saw 
the lake this close, he wondered if Haldir would allow for a brief stop. 

Haldir, looking over his shoulder, saw that Tirith had come to a stop. 
Apparently something had caught Erestor’s attention. Following the 
dark-haired Elf’s gaze, he realized it was the lake and this morning’s 
conversation returned to him. Signaling for his brothers to stop, he 
guided his horse close to Erestor’s. “Do you want to go swimming?”

Erestor, who hadn’t heard Haldir join him, startled. Cramps began to 
build in his lower back and a swim sounded like the perfect solution. 
“Would you mind taking a break for a few minutes?” 
 

“We will go for a swim, then,” decreed Haldir. 

Rumil and Orophin had heard and were looking forward to a bath 
themselves. 

Haldir took the lead and once they had reached the lake, the march 
warden trained his senses on his surroundings. Finding no potential 
danger was near, he signaled for the others to also dismount. They 
quickly removed their clothes and Haldir noticed Erestor’s difficulty in 
removing his undershirt, not quite managing. “More cramps?” he 
guessed correctly. 

“My lower back,” admitted Erestor in a soft tone.  

“Then let us attend to that.” Haldir helped Erestor out of the annoying 
shirt and smiled warmly, seeing the blush on the dark-haired Elf’s face. 
Erestor was trying to cover up his private parts with his hands, 
obviously embarrassed. “I have seen you naked before,” whispered 
Haldir soothingly. “And so did my brothers when you were in that 
withdrawn state. There is no need to feel ashamed.”

Erestor slowly raised his hands and settled them on his abdomen 
instead. He knew they had attended to him when he had mourned the 
loss of his sons and told himself not to feel embarrassed. 

Rumil and Orophin, who had overheard the conversation, gave Erestor 
some space by running into the water, splashing the other. Soon, they 
were giggling and trying to pull the other under, which always 
backfired.

“Come with me,” said Haldir, extending his hand, which Erestor took. 
He led the pregnant Elf into the cool water until it reached their waist. 
“Now try to float.” He hoped that once Erestor felt relaxed, the muscle 
cramps would ease as well. 

Erestor eased his body into the water and stared at the star-filled sky 
once he was afloat. “You were right,” he whispered softly, as the 
tension in his back began to loosen up.

Haldir nodded, smiled, and remained close to Erestor, making sure the 
pregnant Elf stayed afloat. His brothers’ delighted yells reached him 
and he looked at them as they tried to wrestle the other. He briefly 
wondered who would win, knowing they were evenly matched. 

“It feels good,” whispered Erestor, whose eyes were beginning to close. 
For so long he had lived with tension, fear of Galadriel, and 
uncertainty, and finally it seemed he would have peace at last. He was 
looking forward to living in Imladris. He didn’t expect Elrond to 
greatly care about him, except as a patient, but he was looking forward 
to exploring the valley, which was said to be beautiful. 

Haldir caressed Erestor’s brow and the large eyes opened slowly to look 
at him. “I hope you will be happy in Imladris.”

A lump of emotion was building in Erestor’s throat. “But you will stay 
with me, won’t you?”

“Aye, I will. I promised, didn’t I?” Haldir smiled warmly at Erestor. “If 
we can keep up this pace we will reach the valley in five days. Then 
you can rest.”

Erestor involuntarily rested a hand on his abdomen. “I want this one to 
be born alive, Haldir. I cannot lose another one.”

Haldir knew Erestor was deadly serious. If Erestor for some reason lost 
this baby, they would lose him as well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next few days passed in companionable silence. Erestor was busy 
sorting out his thoughts and feelings where Haldir and Elrond were 
concerned. He was afraid he would unwillingly hurt the march warden 
in the end. He was reminded of his conversation with Rumil, when 
Elrond had left, and admitted to himself that he did have feelings for 
Elrond. If only things had developed differently. 

“Now it is you who is brooding,” said Haldir teasingly. Erestor was an 
open book to him and he easily read the fears and doubts on the other’s 
face. /He always worries about others and seldom for himself. Elrond 
would be lucky to have him as a mate./

“I was thinking,” started Erestor slowly, making sure Rumil and 
Orophin couldn’t overhear them. “You cannot stay in Imladris forever. 
Your place is at Celeborn’s side, guarding Lothlorien’s borders. And I 
could never take you away from your brothers, who, as you told me, 
will return to the Golden Wood.”

“Do not trouble yourself about that,” said Haldir, ill at ease with this 
topic.

“But it is the truth. No matter how long it may take, in the end your 
heart will command you to return to Lothlorien and I want you to 
know that I understand. I do not want you to waste your life at my 
side.”

Haldir growled softly. “Being with you is not wasting my life!”

“But it is. You have been stuck with me since they commanded you to 
guard me. You and your brothers deserve better. You deserve complete 
freedom.”

Haldir shot Erestor a warning look. “We may not have liked that order 
in the beginning, and the Valar know we mistreated you, but we have 
come to care for you. Rumil and Orophin think of you as their 
brother.”

“But you do not.”

“I think of you as my lover,” said Haldir steadfast.

“But I can never truly be your lover, Haldir.” Erestor’s voice was filled 
with longing and sorrow. “You deserve better than that – than me.”

“Don’t you ever dare say that again!” growled Haldir displeased. “You 
are a very special person, warm and caring, and anyone would be 
fortunate to have your friendship, let alone your love.”

“Ah, Haldir, you are determined to make this hard for me.” Haldir was 
riding close to him and Erestor cupped the march warden’s cheek in his 
palm. “I want you to know that I set you free, that you should not 
consider yourself bound to me in any way. If love comes your way, do 
not let it slip away.”

“I already have you,” whispered Haldir, loyally. 

“Aiya, Haldir.” Erestor caressed the guardian’s face. “You will always 
have me, but there is enough space in your heart for another, trust me.”

“I do not want another!” Haldir now glared at Erestor. “And I consider 
this conversation closed.”

Erestor sighed, hoping Haldir would understand one day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“This is our last evening together,” said Rumil regretfully, whilst they 
settled down around the campfire. “We will reach the Last Homely 
House tomorrow.” He cocooned Erestor in a warm blanket, as the 
night’s chill was creeping over the lands. Now that the Elf was 
pregnant, Erestor seemed more susceptible to the cold. 

Erestor bowed his head and hid his features behind his long hair. The 
truth was that he didn’t want this trip to end. Not any more. When 
they had left, he had wanted to reach Imladris quickly, but now he 
wanted to continue to travel with the three brothers. They had made 
the trip as pleasurable and comfortable as possible and he didn’t want 
to part with Rumil and Orophin. But Haldir at least would stay with 
him. 

“Here, eat.” Rumil handed Erestor a large piece of Lembas and a cup of 
herbal tea, which he had prepared every evening during their trip. 
Camfael had assured him it would ease muscle cramps and prevent 
morning sickness and Erestor had been spared the nausea in the 
morning, for which all three felt grateful. 

“I am not hungry,” objected Erestor, but Rumil pushed the food and tea 
into his hands any way. 

“You must eat for both of you,” said Haldir, reminding Erestor that he 
had to uphold his strength. 

Erestor sighed deeply and then nibbled reluctantly on the waybread. 
Rumil and Haldir were fussing over him, knowing he felt depressed. It 
was a good thing Orophin was scanning ahead, because he didn’t think 
he could have survived another mother hen. 

Erestor suddenly shivered. “Do you think Galadriel will sabotage her 
husband’s plan?” Maybe she already had. His greatest fear was that 
Galadriel would tell Elrond that he was a kinslayer. Even if it was just a 
lie, the half-Elf would believe his mother in law and shun him for it. 

“Maybe,” said Haldir thoughtfully. “But I trust in Celeborn. He will 
find ways to contain her scheming.”

Erestor nodded unenthusiastically, not really believing the Lord of the 
Golden Wood could control Galadriel in any way.

“When will Orophin and you leave? Right away?” Erestor searched 
Rumil’s sparkling eyes. He was truly blessed with such good friends. 

“Aye, I think so. Celeborn told us to return at once. You must 
understand,” said Rumil, holding Erestor’s gaze, “Our borders are still 
under attack. Sauron is gaining in strength and Celeborn wants to keep 
our realm safe. He needs every sentry to patrol the borders.” He 
realized he had said the wrong thing when Erestor’s gaze worriedly 
shifted to Haldir. 

“Then they will need you as well, Haldir.” Haldir had commanded 
Celeborn’s forces before they had left and he wondered how the 
sentries would deal with losing their commanding officer. “You should 
go back with your brothers.”

Haldir had pushed that thought away since they had left the Golden 
Wood. “Celeborn is a cunning leader. He can do without me.” Celeborn 
had to do without him, because he refused to leave Erestor’s side in his 
current condition. 

Feeling guilty for keeping Haldir from performing his duties, Erestor’s 
mood darkened. 

Rumil, who sat closest to Erestor, noticed it and leaned against him, 
pulling the pregnant Elf close. “Haldir makes his own decisions, 
remember?”

Erestor nodded, fatigued, accepting he couldn’t change Haldir’s 
opinions.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“That is the Last Homely House where Elrond resides.” Haldir pointed 
the structure out to Erestor, hoping to spark the other Elf’s interest. 
Now that they were about to ride into Imladris, Erestor seemed sullen 
and withdrawn. He wondered if this was the first mood swing 
connected to the pregnancy and mentally prepared himself for much 
worse ones.

“Aha,” whispered Erestor, forcing himself to look at the building. Guilt 
had been clawing at him since he had realized he was keeping Haldir 
from carrying out his duties as Celeborn’s second in command. 

Tirith trod carefully, like the stallion had done for every day these past 
weeks. Erestor had learned to appreciate the horse’s carefulness and 
would actually be sorry to part from him. 

Rumil stood in the stirrups and scanned their surroundings. “There are 
guards in the trees around us. They have probably already told Elrond 
that we are approaching Imladris.”

Erestor felt nauseous, realizing he had to face Elrond shortly. “What if 
he recognizes me?”

Haldir worried about that as well. “I doubt it,” he said eventually. “He 
was drugged, and you were wearing face paint. I doubt he will make 
the connection.”

“I hope so.” Erestor wanted Elrond to find out the truth at one moment, 
and the next, he prayed to Nienna that the half-Elf would never 
recognize him. His feelings and desires no longer made any sense to 
him. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Arien was beginning her daily descent when Haldir led them onto the 
courtyard, where he found two blond Elves waiting for him. Elrond 
was nowhere in sight. “Mae govannen! I bring greetings from Lord 
Celeborn.” Haldir quickly dismounted and studied the two Elves in 
front of him. One of them was dressed in luxurious burgundy robes, his 
long, white hair dancing on his back and hands hidden in the sleeves. 
He was certain that he had never met this Elf before, but the other one, 
he knew. 

Glorfindel was wearing a grey shirt, green leggings and tunic. Long, 
leather boots reached his knees and he even carried his sword. Meeting 
the azure eyes, Haldir felt something soften in his heart. The eyes were 
as blue as the sea and he nearly drowned in them. Glorfindel was 
stunning. Why hadn’t he noticed that three millennia ago? 

“You are most welcome here, Haldir of ‘Lorien. This is Lindir, Lord 
Elrond’s seneschal.” Glorfindel, amused at seeing the adoring 
expression in Haldir’s eyes, smiled. Glorfindel flashed back to that one 
night, three thousand years ago, when Haldir had brought that 
mysterious healer to them. He had promised Elrond to continue his 
efforts to find out more about this healer and he hoped Haldir would 
answer some of his questions. His gaze shifted from Haldir to his two 
silver-haired brothers and was reminded of receiving a party of four 
after the Battle of the Last Alliance. Now, as well as back then, they 
were escorting an Elf, whose features were hidden behind a curtain of 
raven hair. “And I suppose you are Erestor?” Elrond had informed him 
that the pregnant Elf would stay with them for quite some time. 

Erestor shivered, hearing Glorfindel speak his name. Although the 
golden-haired Balrog Slayer seemed kind and friendly, old suspicions 
awoke, reminding him not to trust easily. “Aye, I am Erestor.”

“Rumil? Help Erestor dismount,” ordered Haldir, who found it hard to 
look away from Glorfindel. He rarely felt nervous, but now he did, 
looking into Glorfindel’s sapphire eyes.

Rumil and Orophin assisted Erestor when the Elf dismounted and 
remained close in case Erestor needed their support.

“Erestor, you are most welcome here. Lindir will show you to your 
quarters, which I hope will be to your satisfaction. Elrond will visit 
with you in the morning. He felt you should rest for some time.” 
Glorfindel felt vexed, now that the dark hair kept him from looking at 
Erestor’s face. Realizing there was little he could do about that, 
Glorfindel dismissed it for now and concentrated on his duties. “Haldir, 
I will show you to your rooms. Are your brothers staying as well?”

“For the night, aye,” decided Haldir. “They will leave for Lothlorien in 
the morning.” His brothers could do with a good night’s sleep. 

Erestor eyed Lindir suspiciously now that the white-haired Elf was 
moving closer toward him and he shot Haldir a pleading glance.

Which Glorfindel noticed at once. His curiosity had already been 
piqued, learning that the Elf Celeborn was sending here was pregnant. 
He had never met a male Elf before who was with child. 

“I will accompany Erestor,” said Rumil, seeing Erestor’s discomfort. He 
also realized that Haldir couldn’t refuse Glorfindel’s offer to show him 
to his rooms. He hoped that his presence would reassure Erestor.

Glorfindel read Erestor’s body language with ease, finding the pregnant 
Elf afraid and uncertain. He would tell Elrond to proceed with caution 
when the half-Elf examined their guest, who seemed easily startled.

Erestor sighed, relieved, now that Rumil would stay close to him. 
When Lindir signaled for him to follow, he reluctantly did. 

Haldir watched them leave, and was determined to reassure Erestor 
later. But for now he had to concentrate on Glorfindel. 

“Erestor is in the best hands here,” said Glorfindel soothingly, walking 
toward the doorway. 

Haldir followed Glorfindel into the Last Homely House and felt 
mesmerized, seeing the golden locks teasingly caress the Balrog Slayer’s 
face. He couldn’t remember feeling this way before and briefly 
wondered if love at first sight really existed. Was he experiencing it 
now?

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine. 


Heart in Chains
Part 19


“I must say I am curious,” started Glorfindel softly. “I never met a 
pregnant male Elf before.”

Haldir wasn’t sure how to respond. “Erestor is also the first pregnant 
male Elf I ever met,” he said eventually. Eager for Glorfindel to like 
Erestor, so the dark-haired Elf would have another friend here, he 
added, “He is also one of the kindest souls I ever met.”

Glorfindel nodded once, then gave Haldir a thoughtful glance. “I am 
surprised that Celeborn would send his Captain to attend to this Elf. I 
would imagine your men miss their commanding officer.”

“Celeborn is more than capable of leading his men himself,” said Haldir 
somewhat defensively, growing alert. Glorfindel’s questions seemed 
innocent, but they weren’t. “Sometimes we need to get our priorities 
straight.”

“And Erestor is more important than securing Lothlorien’s borders?” 
They had reached the corridor in which Haldir’s quarters were 
situated, and Glorfindel stopped at the appropriate door. 

“In a certain way, he is,” said Haldir, determinedly meeting Glorfindel’s 
puzzled eyes. “Each child that comes to us is precious.”

Again, Glorfindel nodded his head. “You are right, of course.” 
Glorfindel opened the door and signaled for Haldir to step inside. “I 
hope to learn more about this unique Elf. It is rare for a male to be 
pregnant.”

“As you said, Erestor is quite unique.” Haldir inspected his quarters, 
knowing Glorfindel expected him to and then nodded his head. “These 
are very luxurious quarters.”

“They are to your liking, then?”

“Yes.” Haldir didn’t dare meet Glorfindel’s eyes, now that butterflies 
were tickling his insides. The Balrog Slayer was kind, intelligent and 
polite, but Haldir wondered what sides of his personality Glorfindel 
was hiding and found himself eager to find out. He was intelligent 
enough to realize he was considered handsome himself, as many Elves 
had tried to court him. Except for Erestor, he had rejected most of 
them, but Glorfindel would be worthy of him. The question was; did 
Glorfindel deem him worthy in turn?
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I hope the rooms are to your liking, Erestor,” said Lindir, confident 
that the spacious quarters would please his guest. He had selected a 
suite with a large balcony, offering a grand view of Imladris’ waterfalls. 
This suite was usually given to royal guests, but as Celeborn had 
seemed so concerned about Erestor, Elrond had decided to pamper 
their pregnant guest.

Erestor swallowed hard, looking about. The bedroom was large, held a 
desk, two comfortable chairs, a wardrobe and a luxurious four-poster 
bed with a star-speckled canopy.

Rumil gently pulled him into the bathroom to point out the pool, 
sunken into the floor. “Now you can turn into a prune,” said the silver-
haired Elf teasingly. 

Erestor grinned and gave Rumil a warm smile. He appreciated it that 
Rumil was staying close to him. But he still hoped that Haldir would 
join him later. He needed his protector close.

Lindir also smiled, realizing these airy and sunlit rooms were just what 
Erestor needed. His eyes dropped lower, coming to rest on the dark-
haired Elf’s abdomen. Erestor was holding his hands protectively in 
front of him, but Lindir could still see the slight distention, revealing 
his pregnancy. When Elrond had told him about their guest, he had 
found it hard to believe that a male Elf could conceive, but he was 
seeing the proof now. Lindir cleared his throat in order to gain Erestor’s 
attention. Once the dark-haired Elf’s shy gaze was directed at him, he 
said, “Would you like to eat breakfast in the great hall or would you 
prefer it to be brought to your rooms?”

Erestor, feeling a tad nervous, let his dark hair fall in front of his face. 
“My rooms, please.” That way he didn’t have to face any judging eyes. 

“As you wish,” said Lindir, making a mental note. “Would you like 
some light refreshments before going to bed?” Ithil had long risen, but 
he imagined a pregnant Elf might still be hungry. 

“Nay, thank you.” The last thing Erestor wanted was to be a burden.

Lindir slowly walked toward the doorway now that his services were 
no longer needed. “A servant will take you to the Healing House in the 
morning where Lord Elrond will be waiting for you.”

Erestor nodded, his dark hair dancing in front of him. He felt relieved 
when Lindir finally closed the door behind him and then began to rave. 
“Why did I come here? What was I thinking? I cannot do this!” Panic 
was building inside him, but then a hand settled on his shoulder, 
reminding him that he wasn’t alone. 

“You *can* do this, Erestor,” said Rumil firmly. “You deserve to be 
treated well, and not like Galadriel has treated you. She used you in so 
many ways. It looks like Elrond wants to pamper you, let him.”

Erestor sighed, distressed. “These are alien surroundings and these 
Elves…”

“They will get to know you and come to care for you. Give it time. And 
I think Elrond is right; you do need to rest. You are swaying on your 
feet.” Rumil gently took hold of Erestor’s arm and guided him to the 
bed, where he sat him down. He then lifted Erestor’s feet, not leaving 
his charge a choice but to comply. 

Erestor lay down, looking at Rumil thoughtfully. “I do not want 
Orophin and you to leave.”

“Haldir will stay with you and Lindir seems friendly. I am sure you will 
quickly make new friends here.” Seeing the look of abandonment in 
Erestor’s dark eyes, he sighed and then lay down as well, spooning 
behind his charge. He knew from personal experience that Erestor 
wouldn’t be able to sleep in a strange bed when he was alone. “Rest 
now.”

“Will you wake me if Haldir joins us?” 

“Of course,” said Rumil, soothingly stroking the long hair. “Now rest.”

Erestor was finally able to let go, now that someone was watching over 
him and his baby, and he drifted off into reverie.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The moment Glorfindel closed the door behind him, Haldir removed 
his arms and cloak and then left as well, heading for Erestor’s rooms. 
He hoped Rumil had managed to comfort Erestor, who had seemed 
distressed. Entering without knocking first, Haldir smiled, seeing Rumil 
holding Erestor in his sleep. 

Rumil’s eyes immediately sought out Haldir’s. “He is worried.”

Haldir sat down on the bed and the two brothers traded positions. Now 
it was Haldir lying down and holding Erestor, who instantly moved 
closer. 

“Worried about what?” Haldir instinctively placed one hand over 
Erestor’s abdomen, hoping the dark-haired Elf felt protected. 

“He does not know how to act around them. He has been confined for 
too long.” Rumil bit his bottom lip, knowing very well that it would 
take time for Erestor to feel comfortable here. If only Orophin hadn’t 
drawn the wrong conclusion all those millennia ago! Rumil felt guilty 
for his brother’s mistake in judgment, knowing Orophin felt even 
guiltier. 

“Go to bed, Rumil. Orophin and you still have a long trip back ahead of 
you and you need the rest. I will look after Erestor.”

Rumil got to his feet, walked toward the doorway and looked at Erestor 
one last time. He wasn’t sure if he would ever see the dark-haired Elf 
again. “Take good care of him *and* the baby, Haldir.”

“I will,” promised Haldir. “I will treat the little one as if she were my 
own child.” Then Haldir added privately, /At least until Elrond comes 
to care for you, lirimaer./

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 
 

Erestor woke the next morning because Haldir was moving about in 
bed. “Lay still…”

“I cannot do that, lirimaer. I need to return to my room. I think it 
would be best if they did not discover just yet that I tend to sleep in 
your bed.” 

The expression in Erestor’s eyes grew sad. Turning around in Haldir’s 
embrace, he made eye contact with the silver-haired Elf. 

“I might not be able to come to you every night, Erestor,” said Haldir 
softly. “I might find myself tangled up with other engagements.”

“Like?” Erestor didn’t like the sound of this. 

Haldir drew in a deep breath before delivering the bad news. 
“Glorfindel mentioned that Elrond is interested in learning more of 
Lothlorien’s defensive actions when it comes to securing our borders. 
Glorfindel asked me to occasionally patrol the borders with him and 
see if I can add to their guards’ training.”

Erestor’s eyes narrowed, hearing a certain note to Haldir’s voice when 
speaking the name of the blond. “Glorfindel?” His first suspicion was 
quickly confirmed when Haldir failed to stop his blush from spreading 
over his face. “Glorfindel?” The blush intensified and Haldir cleared his 
throat. “Glorfindel!” Erestor smiled sorrowfully. “You like him?”

“Not in the way that I like you!” Haldir averted his gaze. “I did not wish 
for you to find out when I am not certain of my feelings yet.”

“They seem very clear to me.” Erestor felt somewhat saddened, 
realizing that he would have to let go of Haldir shortly, which meant 
he would stay behind alone. But another part of him rejoiced. He had 
never been able to fully return Haldir’s feelings and the march warden 
deserved someone who could love him in return. “You are in love with 
him.”

“I am not,” said Haldir grumpily. 

“You are.” Erestor’s voice was remarkably tender, speaking those 
words. Using one hand to raise Haldir’s face, the other’s gaze 
reluctantly met his. “I told you before that I want you to be happy. 
Pursue this. Find out if the feeling is mutual.”

“Erestor! Glorfindel and I met only last night! It is not like we are going 
to get married tomorrow!” The willingness – almost eagerness – with 
which Erestor was accepting this unnerved Haldir. But what other 
reaction had he expected? Erestor never threw tantrums. “No matter 
what happens, I want you to know that you will always hold a very 
special place in my heart.”

“I know that,” said Erestor sincerely. “I came back for you. I would 
never have done that if it had not been for your love.”

Haldir swallowed hard. “I do not want to hurt you, lirimaer.”

“We always knew that this day would come. And I am happy that you 
are falling in love. I just hope Glorfindel realizes what a treasure you 
are and that he will treat you right.”

“Erestor, this is so very new and you are talking like Glorfindel and I 
are already together. We are not.”

“Then make sure he becomes yours, meleth-nîn.” Erestor tenderly 
stroked Haldir’s brow. “Impress him, do whatever is necessary to make 
him notice you.” The smile that appeared on Haldir’s face made him 
smile in turn. “I am certain you are capable of seducing Glorfindel.”

“Seducing Glorfindel? Is that your advice on what course to take in this 
matter?” Haldir grinned. 

“Yes.” Erestor rubbed Haldir’s brow with his thumb and then pulled 
away. The time had come to distance himself from the march warden. 
In that way he could give Haldir a chance to build a new life for 
himself here, hopefully with Glorfindel at his side. “And now go back 
to your room. I need to take a bath and see Elrond.”

Haldir refused to be rushed. “Are you nervous about that?”

Erestor sighed. “I would be lying if I told you no. I *am* nervous. But I 
also know I have to do this.” 

Haldir tightened the hold he still had on Erestor, refusing to let go just 
yet. “Do you want me to accompany you today?”

Erestor was tempted to accept, but shook his head in the end. He had to 
stop being so dependent on Haldir. “I will manage alone.”

Haldir doubted that, but remained quiet, allowing Erestor to make his 
own decisions.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Elrond looked up from his plate when Glorfindel entered his private 
chambers. Normally he joined his staff for breakfast in the great hall, 
but this morning he felt some need for privacy and had decided to eat 
breakfast in his quarters instead. “Good morning,” he said, greeting 
Glorfindel, who looked remarkably pensive this morning.

Glorfindel, dressed in his usual silver and green attire, pulled up a chair 
and sat down opposite Elrond, who was already reading reports at his 
desk. “Just a word of warning.”

“About what?” His curiosity piqued, Elrond placed the papers aside and 
looked at Glorfindel whilst sipping his tea. 

“I welcomed the party from Lothlorien last night.”

“Ah, how did that go?” Elrond leaned back in his chair and occasionally 
slipped a morsel of bread, layered with honey, into his mouth. 

“Haldir of ‘Lorien seemed nervous for some reason I cannot label and 
he was remarkably eager to remain near his charge.”

“The pregnant Elf? What was his name again?”

“Erestor.” Glorfindel looked thoughtfully at Elrond. “He kept his face 
hidden behind his long, dark hair, making it impossible for me to get a 
good look at his face.”

“And Haldir’s brothers?”

“Rumil accompanied our guest when Lindir seemed to intimidate 
Erestor.” Glorfindel stole a slice of buttered bread and began to munch 
on it. In between bites, he added, “They are already on their way back 
to Lothlorien.”

“Yet Haldir remains?”

“Aye, it is beyond me why Celeborn would assign Haldir to minding 
this pregnant Elf. Haldir is a formable and cunning warrior, needed to 
command Celeborn’s men and yet he is sent here.”

Elrond nodded, contemplating Glorfindel’s words. “Erestor must then 
be important to Celeborn.” An absurd thought entered his mind. “Do 
you think Celeborn fathered the child?”

Glorfindel shrugged once. “I do not know about that, but I find it odd 
that Celeborn has a personal interest in this pregnant Elf.”

Elrond agreed. “I will examine Erestor this morning and see what I can 
find out.” Putting down his empty teacup, he asked, “Did you already 
make inquiries about my mysterious healer?” 

“I did not get a chance yet, but I plan to ask Haldir. He is Celeborn’s 
confidant and might let something slip. Are your spies making any 
progress?”

Elrond shook his head. “All they gathered is that a healer did reside 
there, but they cannot seem to find him.” This vexed him. “I just want 
to know why he won’t reveal himself to me. I am greatly indebted to 
him and wish to express my gratitude.”

Glorfindel’s eyes narrowed. “What if he does not have a say in the 
matter?”

“’Tis possible,” admitted Elrond, “Though I do not know why anyone 
would force him to help me.”

“We will find out,” said Glorfindel, rising from his chair. “Ah, that 
reminds me. A word of advice, Elrond. Erestor seemed rather timid to 
me and easily frightened. I suggest you act with caution when you 
meet with him. You do not want to scare him off.”

“I will be cautious,” promised Elrond. He watched as Glorfindel 
‘acquired’ another slice of bread and then left the room. Now that he 
was alone again, he surrendered to his musings. /Why are you so 
important to Celeborn that Haldir is ordered to remain at your side? 
And why are you so easily intimated?/ 

Elrond grew tired of asking himself these questions and rose from 
behind his desk to change into his formal robes. The only way to get 
his answers was to meet with Erestor.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor gingerly followed the servant who was taking him to the 
Healing House. Once he had arrived there, his curiosity awoke and 
now that he was alone, he began to study the herbs that hung from the 
ceiling, drying, so they could be used in potions later. 

One hand remained on his abdomen most of the time. He was nearly 
seven months pregnant and frightened he could lose his baby any 
moment now. The possibility of a miscarriage scared him witless and 
made him think that confining himself to his rooms was the safest way 
to ensure his child was born healthy. 

“Erestor, I presume?”

Elrond’s voice startled him and he spun around, nearly losing his 
balance. When had the Peredhel entered the room and why hadn’t he 
heard? Acting on instinct, he let his hair obscure his face, whilst 
rubbing his abdomen in an effort to assure himself that everything was 
all right with his baby. 

Elrond was taken aback, seeing the dark hair fall like a curtain in front 
of his patient’s face, obviously in an effort to shield himself from 
curious looks. “Peace, my friend, I mean you no harm.” Fear came 
rolling off his patient in waves. “I am Elrond Half-Elven and Lord 
Celeborn asked me to supervise your pregnancy.” Erestor remained 
quiet and his body posture told Elrond that his patient desperately 
wanted to flee the room. “Why don’t we sit down?” He pointed at the 
pair of comfortable chairs situated near the window. They would have 
a calming view of the Bruinen when sitting there.

Erestor realized he couldn’t defy Elrond and gingerly shuffled over to 
the chairs. Seating himself, he made sure his hair continued to hide his 
face. He couldn’t take the risk of looking at Elrond, afraid that the half-
Elf would recognize him. 

Elrond also sat down, telling himself to be extremely careful and 
patient with Erestor. “How do you fare this morning? Any nausea?”

“No morning sickness,” said Erestor in a barely audible voice.

A pleasant tingling sensation coursed through Elrond’s body at hearing 
Erestor’s voice. For some reason it sounded familiar. “How far along are 
you?” He had studied the information Celeborn had given him, but 
preferred to make sure all data was correct.

“Seven months now.” Erestor squirmed uncomfortable on his chair. He 
desperately wanted to look at Elrond, fling himself into the half-Elf’s 
arms and be held, but he remained motionless. 

So Celeborn’s information had been accurate. “Cramps? Mood swings? 
Food cravings? Any physical discomfort?” He was working his way to 
his most delicate question; that of the miscarriage, which Erestor had 
suffered according to Celeborn’s letter.

“Not really,” whispered Erestor. “I feel… odd at times, but nothing I 
cannot deal with.”

Elrond didn’t know why, but that answer displeased him for some 
reason. Clearing his throat, he knew he had to be very tactful. 
“Celeborn wrote that this is not your first pregnancy.” From where he 
was sitting he could see Erestor tense up. “I regret bringing up painful 
memories, but I need to know your medical history.”

Erestor sighed, trying to calm his raging nerves. “Lord Celeborn told 
you the truth. I suffered a miscarriage three millennia ago.”

Elrond’s heart went out to Erestor. He had delivered his children 
personally, and the mere thought of Celebrian having a miscarriage and 
losing one of them filled his heart with pain. “I feel for you, and I will 
do my best to ensure this one will rest in your arms, sound and well.” 
Tremors racked Erestor’s body and Elrond wondered if his patient 
would accept his soothing touch. But when Erestor flinched away from 
him, he realized it was too soon. “Celeborn’s chief healer examined you 
before you left and he thought you were pregnant with one child?” 
Elrond had wondered why Camfael had felt it necessary to include ‘one 
child’.

“I lost twins…” Erestor choked up, wanting to tell Elrond that *they* 
had lost twins, but he couldn’t bring himself to confide in the half-Elf. 
“Boys.”

Elrond’s heart constricted painfully, imagining losing Elladan and 
Elrohir. That thought caused him much pain and he quickly pushed it 
away, but it did encourage him to give Erestor the best care possible. 
“My heart aches for you.”

Erestor sobbed softly, unable to contain his pain and so desperately 
wanting to share it with Elrond, the twins’ other parent, but he 
couldn’t. “Thank you. That means a lot to me.” More than he could 
ever tell Elrond.

“I would like to examine you now,” said Elrond, rising from his chair. 
He immediately caught the flinch that moved through Erestor’s tense 
body. “Would you remove your robes and shirt? You can leave your 
leggings on.”

Erestor’s mouth had gone dry at hearing that request and he prayed 
Elrond wouldn’t recognize the body that had received him three times 
in those long millennia. Slowly, he pushed himself to his feet and began 
to disrobe.

Elrond moved over to the large table that took up a quarter of the 
room. “Please lie down on your back.” Elrond studied Erestor’s body 
language and realized this was the last place the other Elf wanted to be. 

Erestor forced himself to comply, but once he had lain down, he 
realized that his hair no longer offered him any refuge from Elrond’s 
probing eyes. 

Elrond was surprised to see Erestor’s large, chocolate eyes, the refined, 
high cheekbones and luscious lips. The Elf was definitely handsome, 
beautiful even, and there was absolutely no reason for him to hide 
behind his hair. /And he reminds me of someone… It is the eyes… In 
the eyes… Those huge, chocolate eyes./ 

Pushing that thought aside for now, Elrond concentrated on examining 
his patient. Placing his hands on the swollen abdomen, he probed the 
area. “I agree with Camfael. There is only one child.” Trying to make 
eye contact with Erestor, he was disappointed to find that the Elf had 
closed his eyes. He continued the examination and encountered the 
scar the miscarriage had left behind and Elrond felt pity for Erestor, 
who had lost his twins. “There is some scar tissue.”

“Camfael already told me.” Erestor’s eyes remained close, knowing they 
could spark Elrond’s memory of other times when he had touched him. 
“Do you expect complications?” 

Elrond rubbed his thumb tenderly over the stretched skin, considering 
his patient’s questions. “Complications are always possible.” Erestor 
tensed further and Elrond instantly regretted his words. “But I will do 
my best to prevent them.”

“May I get dressed again now?” Erestor felt ill at ease, being this 
vulnerable and partly naked. 

“One more moment.” Elrond frowned, fully realizing how skinny 
Erestor was. Ribs showed clearly beneath the skin. “When was the last 
time you ate?”

“On the road. Orophin caught some game.” Erestor already knew what 
would follow. 

“You need to increase your food intake, Erestor.”

“I will try,” promised Erestor. He would do anything if only his child 
was born healthy.

Elrond had finished his examination and stepped away from his patient. 
“You may dress yourself again.” The speed with which Erestor rose and 
slipped into his robes amazed him and once more the raven hair 
obscured the other Elf’s face. “I want to examine you again in one week 
and do not hesitate to tell me if you feel any discomfort. I am here to 
make this as comfortable for you as possible.”

“Thank you,” whispered Erestor from behind strands of dark hair. “May 
I leave now?” The truth was that he didn’t want to return to his room, 
his new prison. He craved being close to Elrond instead, but also knew 
the half-Elf was busy ruling Imladris. 

“Aye, you may leave.” Elrond sat down and watched the silent and dark 
form leave the room. “Glorfindel was right,” he muttered privately. 
“You are easily frightened and intimidated, and yet there is something 
about you that tells me you are very strong. A true survivor.” 
Frowning, he realized something else as well. “And your eyes. They 
remind me of someone… who?” The answer was on the tip of his 
tongue, but he just couldn’t label it. 

Dismissing the thought for now, he headed for his study to take care of 
his usual daily affairs. But being honest with himself, he had to admit 
that he was looking forward to having dinner with Erestor. Tonight, he 
would join the others in the Hall of Fire and partake in the evening 
meal. He would tell Lindir to assign Erestor a place at his table so he 
could talk with the mysterious Elf some more.

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine.

Heart in Chains
Part 20



Haldir eyed Glorfindel carefully when the Elda mounted Asfaloth. 
Glorfindel had suggested inspecting the southern borders today and 
Haldir had been unable to refuse when asked to accompany him. After 
all, Elrond was doing Celeborn a big favor by letting Erestor stay here. 
The least he could do to repay that debt was to share his strategic 
knowledge with Glorfindel.

“Are you always this quiet, Haldir of ‘Lorien?” asked Glorfindel in a 
teasing tone. He was leading today’s patrol, which consisted of twenty 
of Imladris’ finest warriors. Normally the twins would also accompany 
him, but an insane urge to extract revenge for Celebrian had sent them 
onto the road, eager to slay as many Orcs as possible. He missed their 
presence, their teasing remarks. They had become completely different 
people since Celebrian had been attacked and he was afraid their hearts 
would never open again. Looking at Haldir, he saw the smug smile on 
the handsome face and wondered about the other. “I thought you 
would be more talkative, my friend.”

Haldir’s smile turned into a smirk. “You are the first to think me that, 
Glorfindel. My brothers are the talkative ones.” He preferred a 
comfortable silence when possible.

Glorfindel pretended to pout. “Then I will do my best to change that!”

Haldir gave the Elda an impish grin. Glorfindel was very pleasant 
company and he continued to steal glances at the blond Elda. The 
Balrog Slayer was a stunning sight, effortlessly guiding Asfaloth 
through the bushes so they could reach the hidden path the Elda had 
mentioned earlier. 

Once they were on that path, Glorfindel gently kneed Asfaloth closer 
to Haldir’s horse and wondered about the stunning smile and adoring 
expression in the other’s hazel eyes. They sparkled with life and energy 
and seemed to draw him in. Although the silence between them felt 
right and comfortable, he desired to hear the march warden’s melodic 
voice again, and asked, “I do not recall that you ever visited Imladris 
before.”

Haldir nodded once. “Your memory does not deceive you. This is my 
first time here.”

“And do you like our valley?” What Glorfindel really wanted to ask 
was, ‘Do you like me?’ But making such an inquiry might be rushing 
things and he was more diplomatic than that. 

“What I have seen of it seems very peaceful and beautiful,” replied 
Haldir honestly. “And I will do my best to help improve your men’s 
training, if that is possible.”

“Elrond and I greatly appreciate your help.” Glorfindel smiled warmly 
at the march warden, wondering what the future held in store for 
them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Yield!” demanded Glorfindel, grinning impishly. He had managed to 
roll Haldir beneath him during their sparring match and had now 
placed his knife at the silver-haired Elf’s throat, careful not to draw any 
blood.

“Never,” growled the march warden. Haldir of ‘Lorien would never 
yield to anyone in battle – love, being a different matter, but not in 
battle. He wrestled his right arm free, curled it around the Elda’s neck 
and managed to flip them over, landing him successfully on top of the 
Balrog Slayer, who looked rather shocked. 

Glorfindel heard his men giggle and cursed Haldir’s idea to demonstrate 
this particular move to him with them present. It seemed he had finally 
met his match in battle. 

“Yield,” whispered Haldir sweetly, carefully keeping any victorious 
feelings he might have out of his voice. Looking deeply into 
Glorfindel’s azure eyes, he realized he was embarrassing the Elf in front 
of his men. Glorfindel couldn’t yield, even if he wanted to. “It was a 
good fight,” said Haldir, pleased, jumping to his feet and extending his 
hand in offer to Glorfindel. “Allow me to help you back to your feet.”

Glorfindel appreciated the fact that Haldir was giving him an 
honorable way out and accepted the limb, letting Haldir pull him back 
onto his feet. “You need to teach me that move.”

“I will.”

Glorfindel felt mesmerized, seeing the laughter and pleasure in those 
hazel eyes. Haldir seemed to exist of light and energy and he was 
drawn to it like a moth to a flame. /One warrior to another. We are the 
same./

That exact thought had drifted through Haldir’s mind as well. And like 
a warrior, he planned to take what he wanted. Glorfindel would fight 
him, and he wasn’t sure which of them would win this battle, but one 
way or the other, their future would be decided shortly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After their bout, they mounted again and returned to inspecting the 
borders. Hazel and azure eyes regularly sought out one another, casting 
probing glances and trying to find out where the other stood. 

Haldir was growing hopeful that his feelings were mutual and couldn’t 
help flashing back to Erestor’s advice to seduce Glorfindel. But contrary 
to popular belief, he wasn’t a flirt and had little experience when it 
came to seduction. So how did one go about seducing a Balrog Slayer?

Said Balrog Slayer was entertaining similar thoughts. He was still trying 
to understand why the attraction hadn’t been there three thousand 
years ago, but maybe they had been too stressed at the time. He cast a 
longing glance at Haldir, but the silver-haired Elf was scanning the 
horizon. He had never felt such an attraction before and he hoped 
Haldir felt it too. But how was he to find out? If he made a move now 
he would seem insincere and rushed, as they had just met, but his body 
begged to differ. During the sparring match, when he had straddled 
Haldir, he had grown hard with desire and if his men hadn’t been 
watching them, he would have been tempted to simply rip the tunic 
from Haldir’s body. Such lust, such passion was new to him and was 
quickly taking over. He wasn’t sure how long he could withstand the 
desire to devour Haldir alive. 

Haldir sighed softly, hoping Glorfindel hadn’t noticed his aroused state 
when he had managed to reverse their positions during their sparring 
match. He ached for the blond, wanted to taste him, make him come 
and swallow every drop the Balrog Slayer would give him. He stopped 
himself when his fantasies got more vivid, imagining Glorfindel 
squirming beneath him, whilst he thrust into the welcoming body. 

“Haldir?”

Glorfindel’s voice shook him from his fantasies and he quickly 
composed himself. But how much longer could he fight off this desire 
to ravage the Elda? These feelings were quickly overwhelming him and 
causing him to stop thinking rationally. “We will return to Imladris 
before nightfall and I was wondering if… if you would agree to joining 
me for dinner in my rooms? The Hall of Fire can be rather loud at times 
and sabotage a good conversation.” Aiya, he hoped he wasn’t too 
transparent by issuing this invitation. He wasn’t sure *if* anything 
would happen once they were alone and had some privacy, but he was 
curious to find out.

“I am honored and accept your generous offer,” said Haldir in a hoarse 
voice, hoping Glorfindel had issued that invitation for the same reason 
that he had accepted it. Tonight would certainly be interesting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor spent the day inside his rooms. He had carried several pillows 
to the balcony, creating a nice, comfortable nest there. Sinking back 
into his soft pile of pillows, he listened to the song of the birds and the 
gentle splashing of the waterfall when it reached the stony surface. 
Imladris was beautiful and he wouldn’t mind spending the rest of his 
life here as a scribe or servant.

He would have preferred to work here as a healer, but he couldn’t 
reveal his healing powers to Elrond. There was too much risk that the 
half-Elf would then connect him to the healer who had saved his life, 
and he wasn’t comfortable with Elrond finding out the truth. What if 
Elrond for some reason decided that the baby was solely his and would 
take her away from him? He couldn’t rule out that the half-Elf would 
be furious with him for keeping his secrets. 

It was clear that he had to keep his identity a secret and he had to 
implore Haldir not to let anything slip to Glorfindel. He smiled, happy 
for Haldir that he was in love again. It would be best for the march 
warden to get over him by falling for Glorfindel. /Haldir has to forget 
about me. We never had a future to begin with./ 

Closing his eyes, he focused on the little one growing inside him and he 
gasped softly, feeling the baby’s first kick. “Oh, you are a feisty one!” 
He had felt that! “Are you trying to tell me something?”

Elrond’s words returned to him, telling him to eat more. That reminded 
him, the breakfast tray was still on the table in his bedroom. Maybe he 
should try to eat something. He pushed himself to his feet, keeping one 
hand beneath his abdomen and sat down in front of the breakfast tray. 
The tea had long grown cold, but there was water as well and he drank 
that. Next were the apple and the strawberries. He already felt full, but 
knew the baby needed something more substantial to grow. He tried 
the raspberry preserves that had been placed beside the bread and 
managed to eat three slices.

Feeling full and bloated, he struggled back to his feet. “I hope you are 
happy now, little one.” The baby reacted with another fierce kick and 
Erestor hoped she was merely expressing her approval.

Once he was settled down amidst his pillows again, he wondered why 
he was so convinced that his baby was a girl. It was instinctual, he 
assumed. 
“I will do everything I can to make sure you are happy here.” He 
realized he should start thinking of a name, but didn’t want to jinx it, as 
he was still afraid that he would suffer another miscarriage.

Leaning back into the pillows, he realized he had seldom felt happier. 
Maybe when he had lived with Elwing and had felt part of her little 
family. /It is strange how everything went. I minded Elrond when he 
was a baby and now I am carrying his child. When did everything 
become this complicated?/

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Having been lured into a state of relaxation, Erestor watched Arien 
begin to move lower in the sky. Ithil was already rising, telling him he 
must have spent many hours here on the balcony. It was probably time 
for dinner and he wondered if another tray would be delivered to his 
room. Ah, well, he could hear it from here if someone knocked on his 
door, and he couldn’t be bothered to move now that he was this 
comfortable. And to be honest, he wasn’t sure if he could still get up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Elrond?” Glorfindel stepped into the half-Elf’s study and searched the 
stormy eyes. Elrond always appreciated his company during the 
evening meals, but tonight, Glorfindel had different plans. “I won’t be 
joining you for dinner.”

Elrond raised an eyebrow. “And why might that be?” Although it was 
really none of his business, he liked to tease his friend once in a while. 
Especially now when Glorfindel’s skin was flushed and the eyes rather 
dilated. 

“I asked Haldir to join me for dinner in my rooms.” Glorfindel saw no 
reason to lie to the Peredhel. Knowing Elrond, the half-Elf would 
quickly find out what was going on in his household anyway.

“Haldir of ‘Lorien?” Elrond gave Glorfindel a cocky smile. “May I 
assume there is a reason why you did that? I gather you would like to 
compare battle strategies? Discuss tactics? Maybe spar?”

“Someone already told you,” groaned Glorfindel, collapsing on the 
chair opposite Elrond’s desk.

“I overheard two of your men when I went for my daily walk in the 
gardens. It seems you were bested, my dear Glorfindel.” Elrond grinned 
broadly. 

“I did not yield!” said Glorfindel in a pouting tone, ashamed that Elrond 
had heard about the embarrassing performance he had given. 

“Nay, you did not have to because he saved your honor by helping you 
to your feet.” Elrond rose from behind the desk, covered the distance 
between them, and rested his hands on the armrests of Glorfindel’s 
chair, effectively keeping his commanding officer in place. “And now 
you are blushing and averting your eyes?” His thoughts raced. “My, 
Glorfindel, should I assume that you are in love with our beautiful 
march warden?”

“You think Haldir beautiful?” Glorfindel sized Elrond up, as if 
considering him competition. 

That jealous reaction brought a grin to Elrond’s face. “Peace, my dear 
friend, I do not desire Haldir!” Although he acted cheerfully most of 
the time, he still missed Celebrian. She had been his other half for so 
long. But thanks to his mysterious healer, he no longer grieved for her 
and had again found his zest for life. If only he could thank his savior 
for that!

“You are not interested in him?” Glorfindel wasn’t sure if Elrond was 
merely teasing him.

“I am not interested in Haldir,” said Elrond reassuringly. “Even if I 
were, I doubt my children would approve of me taking a new mate so 
soon after their mother sailed for Valinor.”

“Are the twins still hunting Orcs?”

“Aye, and I won’t feel at peace until they return safely home.” The 
light-hearted tone had vanished and Elrond began to pace his study. “I 
expect Arwen to arrive home in a few days.” She had retreated to a 
small cottage further up the Bruinen to have some privacy for quiet 
reflection. 

Glorfindel rose from his chair, hoping Elrond had been sincere when 
he had said he wasn’t interested in his march warden. “Celebrian told 
you to love again before she left.”

“I know that,” said Elrond, sighing. “But my family is not ready yet for 
a new addition.”

Glorfindel had almost reached the doorway when he turned around. “I 
almost forgot to ask… How does our pregnant Elf fare?”

“I examined him. As long as no complications occur, he should be able 
to carry the child to full-term. But you were right when you told me he 
was easily frightened. I barely had a chance to study his face, as he was 
constantly hiding behind his hair.”

Glorfindel realized he had forgotten to ask Haldir about their 
mysterious healer, and said, “I want to wait a little longer before 
questioning Haldir on your savior. I do not want him to think that I am 
befriending him in order to gather that information when I am truly 
interested in him.”

“Haldir of ‘Lorien has the reputation of being an excellent warrior, 
Glorfindel. You might want to be tactful and cautious for a change.”

Growling, Glorfindel replied, “I already know he can best me. I will be 
careful all right.”

“You are excused then, but I would like for you and Haldir to join me 
tomorrow evening. Erestor might feel more at ease with Haldir close.”

Glorfindel hadn’t considered that in his desire to get Haldir alone. “I 
will be there tomorrow evening.”

“Good, you may leave then.” Elrond returned to his desk and sat down 
to finish the day’s paper work. Realizing Glorfindel hadn’t left yet, he 
looked at the Elda. “Yes?”

“Are you going to keep an eye on Erestor? When I asked Haldir to join 
me I did not think of the effect it might have on our pregnant Elf.”

“I will look after him,” said Elrond reassuringly. “And now take a bath, 
Glorfindel, if you want a chance with Haldir you’d better not stink of 
horse and dirt!”

“Maybe he likes that smell,” teased Glorfindel in return. 

“You do not really want to find out! Go!” Elrond shooed Glorfindel 
from his study and once the blond was gone, he realized it was time to 
change for dinner. He had been working all day long and a bath and a 
clean set of clothes was just what he needed. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haldir dotingly stared at Erestor, who was still asleep amidst a cloud of 
pillows. He had first wanted to wake the dark-haired Elf, but had then 
reconsidered. Erestor needed his rest and he had seen the nearly empty 
breakfast tray. His main concern had been that Erestor hadn’t eaten all 
day, but now he felt reassured. “I will check on you later.” Much 
depended on how his ‘date’ with Glorfindel went. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Elrond frowned; everyone had arrived for dinner, which was about to 
be served, except Erestor. Looking at Lindir, who sat to his left, he 
asked, “Did Erestor tell you why he is not joining us?”

Lindir’s eyes widened slightly. “My Lord, I have not spoken with him 
since his arrival. I assumed you would tell him to join us for dinner.”

“Then he does not know he is expected here.” Elrond felt the 
overwhelming urge to bite his fingernails, an old habit that he thought 
he had overcome millennia ago. But now he felt nervous, as well as 
guilty for being such a poor host.

“I will ask Erestor to join us.” Lindir began to rise from his chair, but sat 
back down again, seeing Elrond raise a hand.

“Nay, stay. I will see to that.” Elrond pushed back his chair and signaled 
for the servants to start serving dinner. “Erestor and I will join you 
later.” 

A soft murmur traveled through the Hall of Fire. They were more than 
willing to wait until Elrond would join them again, but no one dared to 
disagree with their Lord.

Elrond left the hall and headed for the guest quarters, where he hoped 
to find Erestor. What else had he forgotten to tell Erestor? Briefly, his 
thoughts drifted to Glorfindel and Haldir, who were having a private 
dinner. Ever since Glorfindel had returned from the great Halls of 
Waiting he had hoped that the blond would find a suitable mate. It 
wasn’t the way of the Elves to stay unattached. /I hope you are up to 
the challenge, my dear Glorfindel./ He had heard on several occasions 
that Haldir could be stubborn and a handful. /Well, in that case they 
are evenly matched./ Glorfindel also was a pain in the butt at times.

He had finally reached his destination and knocked on the door to 
Erestor’s rooms. “Erestor? May I come inside?” When he didn’t get an 
answer, he grew worried and knocked again. “Erestor? Is all well? 
Would you please answer me?” But still there was no reply. 

“Erestor?” Carefully, he turned the doorknob, finding that Erestor 
hadn’t locked the door. Soundlessly, he entered and looked about. The 
first thing he noticed was that Erestor was nowhere in sight. The 
breakfast tray was still on the table, but as he looked around, he grew 
worried. Where was Erestor?
 
Then he noticed the missing pillows from the bed and couch. Where 
had they gone? The balcony doors were wide open and Elrond slowly 
stepped onto the balcony, smiling when he found Erestor fast asleep 
amidst the soft fabrics. But then his gaze darkened. Had Erestor been 
here all day? He would have expected some curiosity from the Elf, who 
might have explored the Last Homely House a bit, but now he realized 
that Erestor had done nothing of the kind. Erestor had stayed in his 
rooms after the examination. That really wasn’t acceptable. Erestor 
might have had enough fresh air out here on the balcony, but he 
needed some exercise as well. /I have to take charge and make sure 
things happen differently from tomorrow on./ 

The current circumstances did leave him with a dilemma, as he didn’t 
want to startle Erestor awake. /But I have to wake him up. He needs to 
eat something./ Experimentally, he cleared his throat, hoping it was 
enough to wake Erestor. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Something disturbed his formerly peaceful sleep and he startled awake, 
finding Elrond towering over him. “My Lord!” Quickly, he tried to 
push himself to his feet, but failed, losing his balance when he 
stumbled over his own two feet.

Elrond instinctively reached out and caught the stumbling Elf. “Be at 
peace. I am merely here to remind you that it is time for dinner.”

“Dinner?” Big-eyed and forgetting he was supposed to hide behind his 
long hair, he stared searchingly into Elrond’s eyes.

“Aye, dinner. You cannot afford to miss a single meal in your current 
state.” Elrond still had a tight hold on Erestor’s arm and used it to 
steady the other Elf. “Will you join me for dinner?”

“I… you did not have to… not hungry…” A bit startled to find Elrond 
this close, Erestor averted his eyes, wondering why Elrond had come 
himself to tell him that it was time for dinner.

“I do not believe you are not hungry.” Elrond carefully steered Erestor 
toward the bathroom. “Would you like to freshen up first?”

“Yes…” Erestor swallowed hard, and moved into the bathroom the 
moment Elrond released his arm. He closed the door behind him and 
stared at the mirror. What was he supposed to do? Did Elrond want to 
dine with him privately or would he have to face an entire room of 
Elves? He wasn’t sure he could do that.

Trying to regain his composure, Erestor splashed some cold water onto 
his face. His hair was a tangled mass and he quickly ran a comb 
through the strands, biting down the pain when he encountered a knot. 
Listening closely, he could hear Elrond pace his bedroom. By the Valar, 
the Peredhel was still there! Probably waiting for him! There was no 
way out of this! Drawing in a deep breath, he hoped he would survive 
this evening.

He stepped into the bedroom once more and immediately sensed 
Elrond’s probing eyes on him. “I am ready to go.” He felt somewhat 
proud, realizing his voice sounded steady. 

“Allow me to guide you to the Hall of Fire.” Elrond caught Erestor 
sharply drawing in his breath and wondered why. “And in case you are 
wondering, Haldir won’t join us tonight. It appears Glorfindel and 
Haldir have a lot to discuss.” Eyeing Erestor closely, he was pleasantly 
surprised to find a stunning smile on the handsome face. Apparently 
Erestor had noticed the attraction and approved. /I am glad he does. 
Things might have turned awkward if he continued to need Haldir 
close. I wonder what the exact nature of their relationship is./

Erestor nodded absentmindedly. “Aye, I assume two warriors like them 
have a lot to talk about.” But he did regret missing Haldir’s company. 
Then he chided himself. Haldir was entitled to a life – and love – of his 
own. “I do not know Lord Glorfindel that well, but they seem equally 
matched.”

“Aye, they are.” Elrond proceeded to tell Erestor about the sparring 
match, hoping it would break the ice between them, as he found he 
liked Erestor’s quiet, but solid company.

“Haldir defeated him?” A smile seemed plastered onto his face, trying 
to imagine the look on Haldir’s face when he told the famous Balrog 
Slayer to yield.

“Haldir has quite a reputation as a warrior.” Elrond hoped that talking 
about Haldir might bridge the emotional distance between them. 
Again, he wondered why Erestor seemed so familiar. And again he 
failed to recall exactly why. 

“He has been my champion for many millennia.” Erestor bit his bottom 
lip. Why had he let that one slip?

“For how long have you known him?”

“Over five thousand years,” replied Erestor, realizing he had to be more 
careful in future. Elrond was intelligent and would find out the truth 
about him, otherwise.

They had reached the Hall of Fire and Erestor tensed. Every Elf in 
Imladris seemed to have gathered here, but he knew he was only seeing 
a fraction of the valley’s inhabitants. “Do I really have to go inside?” 
Oops, had he really said that aloud? He had merely wanted to think it.

“Would you prefer a more private setting?” Elrond was more than 
willing to humor his guest.

“No!” said Erestor quickly, preferring this crowd to being alone with 
the half-Elf. 

“Let us join them then.” Elrond carefully took hold of Erestor’s arm and 
guided the pregnant Elf to the main table, where Lindir and a few other 
Elves were seated. He now felt grateful that his table stood slightly 
apart from the crowd. “Please sit down here.”

Erestor’s eyes widened, realizing he was sitting at Elrond’s right side -- 
at the main table. He hadn’t expected that. Gingerly, he seated himself. 
He had hoped to blend in with the crowd, but he could forget about 
that now. A servant appeared beside him, placing a plate in front of 
him. It was filled with various fruits and his stomach growled, 
reminding him he had to eat for two.

“Eat,” decreed Elrond, smiling at Erestor’s surprise. /What was his life 
like in Lothlorien? I will try to make him open up to me. Maybe he 
knows something about my mysterious healer./

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When the second course was placed in front of him, Erestor realized he 
was being served food items that were different from the others. Why?

Catching Erestor’s questioning look, Elrond quickly explained. “I asked 
the cook to prepare some special dishes for you. You need to be on a 
special diet and these foods were selected because they will stimulate 
the baby’s growth and strengthen you.”

“That was very thoughtful of you,” mumbled Erestor in a tiny voice. He 
was surprised that Elrond had done that for him and it urged him to eat 
as much as possible. When he had left Lothlorien, he had thought that 
he would see Elrond just for the examinations, but now he wondered if 
the half-Elf wanted to befriend him as well. It was more than he had 
ever hoped for.

TBC

Beta read by Sulien.
All remaining mistakes are mine.



Heart in Chains
Part 21



Haldir was displeased with the lack of clothing at his disposal. When 
they had fled Lothlorien, he had packed only one spare set, hoping to 
acquire more clothing in Imladris. However, he hadn’t had the time to 
do that yet, so he slipped back into the colors of the Galadhrim. At least 
the bath he had taken had refreshed him. His still damp hair needed 
combing and braiding, and he sat down in front of the mirror to attend 
to the tangled strands.

A few minutes later, the braids were back in place. Studying his 
reflection, he knew it had to do. There was nothing more he could do 
to improve his looks and he left his room, heading for Glorfindel’s.

What would happen tonight? Now that he’d had the time to ponder the 
day’s events, he was rather convinced that the attraction was mutual. 
Why else would Glorfindel stutter when issuing that invitation? /This 
will be interesting, considering neither of us will yield to the other./ He 
grinned, picturing them wrestling each other to find out who would 
get to be on top during their first sexual encounter. As always, he was 
fairly confident that he would win, especially after their sparring 
match. /And then I can do whatever I want to do to him./ That thought 
alone caused him to grow erect.

When he reached the door to Glorfindel’s rooms, he knocked and 
waited for an answer. He expected Glorfindel to tell him to enter, not 
fling the door open and stare at him with big eyes. 

“Haldir.” Glorfindel swallowed hard at the sight of the march warden’s 
ethereal beauty. The long, silver hair was partly braided, but wayward 
strands still teased the guardian’s handsome face. The clothes brought 
out the muscular chest and Glorfindel found himself nearly drowning 
in those sparkling eyes. “Please come inside.”

Haldir approved of Glorfindel’s appearance in turn. The Balrog Slayer 
had apparently bathed as well, smelling of pine and daffodils. He had 
changed into a blue shirt that highlighted his azure eyes. Knee-high 
boots of soft leather completed the look, along with black leggings. His 
groin stirred and he felt the urge to throw Glorfindel against the wall 
and take him standing upright. Haldir forced himself to leave his 
daydreams for what they were and said, “Good evening, my friend.” 
When Glorfindel closed the door behind him, he caught a weak blush 
on the Elda’s face, which led him to believe that the attraction was still 
growing on Glorfindel’s part. /Good./

“A good evening to you too,” said Glorfindel, hoping his voice sounded 
steady. He didn’t feel in control at all – it seemed to be slipping away 
from his very hands, looking at Haldir. “I hope you brought a good 
appetite.”

“Oh, I am hungry all right,” stated Haldir teasingly, hoping Glorfindel 
would read between the lines. To make sure there was no way the 
blond could misunderstand, he provocatively licked his lips.

Glorfindel panted softly and had to avert his gaze. /The Valar help me. 
I want to devour him alive./ Recalling he was to act as Haldir’s host, he 
directed his guest to the table. “Please sit down.”

Haldir made himself comfortable, quickly identifying the food items. 
He had somewhat of a sweet tooth and favored the starter with fruits 
and the dessert, a tempting looking cake with sugar coating… and there 
was cream as well. His day couldn’t get any better.

Glorfindel, more nervous than he had ever been before, stared at the 
strawberries. How was he going to address this attraction between 
them without making a complete fool of himself? What if he was 
wrong and Haldir wasn’t interested in him at all? Peeking at Haldir, he 
saw that the guardian’s smug smirk was back in place. 

Haldir felt Glorfindel’s tension and wondered about the same thing. 
/What do I have to lose? I am fairly sure he wants me in return./ Taking 
the initiative, he selected a fat strawberry and brought it to Glorfindel’s 
lips, running it along the blond’s bottom lip. “Do you like 
strawberries?”

“I do,” whispered Glorfindel breathlessly, realizing Haldir was willing 
to take the risk. In that case, he could do no less, and parted his lips and 
teeth.

Glorfindel’s reaction made Haldir even more hopeful, and he pushed 
the sweet fruit past the open lips. When he wanted to pull back, he 
involuntarily held his breath, at the delicate sensation of Glorfindel 
sucking his fingertip. The dark pupils in a sea of blue had dilated and 
left little to the imagination as to what Glorfindel wanted to do to him. 
“You feel it too, then?” This would be easier than he had thought.

“Aye, I do,” whispered Glorfindel, letting the digit slip from his lips. 
“What are we going to do about this attraction?”

“Always direct,” said Haldir, paying him a compliment. “I suggest we 
act on our feelings.”

For one long moment Glorfindel simply stared at Haldir. “If we did 
that, we would be considered married.” And that was a big step. “Are 
you here to stay, Haldir? Or will you be heading back for the Golden 
Wood?”

“I am here to stay, Glorfindel, though I must admit I still feel 
Lothlorien’s call in my heart.” 

Glorfindel considered the answer carefully. “I gather you are not 
married then?”

Haldir felt he had to be honest. “There is one I care greatly for, but I 
am not married to him, as he is already bound to someone else. But I 
would not give up this friendship if you made it a condition. He 
depends too much on me.”

“Erestor,” said Glorfindel in a moment of complete understanding. “He 
is one of the strangest Elves I have ever met.”

“His life has been one of pain, misunderstanding and sacrifice,” said 
Haldir in a compassionate tone. “Once you get to know him, you will 
understand.”

“I would never make it a condition,” said Glorfindel, “that you give up 
your friendship with Erestor.”

“I knew you would not,” said Haldir, teasingly, picking up another 
strawberry and offering it to Glorfindel. This time the Elda wrapped his 
tongue around his finger and licked it. Glorfindel liked to play, then. 
“A game, perhaps?”

“A game?” Glorfindel frowned, surprised at the change in topic. 

“Do you have a chess board in your rooms?” Haldir would be surprised 
if Glorfindel didn’t. The Elf struck him as a very good strategist and 
tactician, and chess honed one’s skills in both of these areas.

“Of course I have one.” Glorfindel rose from his chair and retrieved the 
game, which he placed on the table next to the strawberries. 

“I suggest a game,” said Haldir, his eyes burning with passion. “The 
loser will yield to the winner, who will have earned the right to claim a 
reward.”

“What kind of reward?” Glorfindel’s eyes narrowed.

“As we have not yet properly discussed marriage, we should start with 
a reward… less penetrating.”

Glorfindel blinked, and then shook his head. “Life will never be boring 
with you around, Haldir of ‘Lorien.”

Haldir grinned impishly. “Good.” 

They set up their pieces and Haldir insisted Glorfindel took white, 
thusly making the first move. He had suggested the game to give them 
some time to talk and sort out their thoughts and feelings. Their gazes 
met over the game and Haldir’s gaze followed Glorfindel’s hand when 
the Elda selected a raspberry. Smiling, he parted his lips, inviting 
Glorfindel to feed it to him. 

Which was exactly what Glorfindel did. The Elda’s toes curled, feeling 
Haldir suckle his fingertip when he pushed the fruit into the 
welcoming mouth. 

“I suggest you concentrate on the game, my friend,” said Haldir 
impishly. 

“You are making that hard.” Glorfindel groaned, realizing what he had 
just said. It hadn’t been intentional! 

“Hard? You are already hard?” Haldir ran his tongue over his bottom 
lip. 

“You do not play fair!”

“Oh, I was not aware that was a requirement,” laughed Haldir 
wickedly. But then he forced himself to calm down. “So, what are your 
thoughts on marriage?”

Glorfindel realized they had returned to the core of their ‘negotiations’ 
and replied honestly, “I have never been married before, Haldir. I find 
it hard 
– no, simply difficult – to take that step.” He hoped Haldir would let his 
slip go unnoticed. How else could he concentrate on this subject if 
Haldir continued to make such innuendo? 

“Is it my charming personality or…?” As it was his way to deal with 
nervousness and insecurity, he hid behind his ‘cockiness’ or arrogance, 
as others would call it.

Glorfindel smiled warmly. “So far you have been the only one I ever 
considered being married to.”

“Ah, so there is hope yet?” Haldir moved one of his pieces, seeing a 
weak spot in Glorfindel’s defenses. 

“There is always hope,” said Glorfindel firmly. “Haldir, have you ever 
been married?”

“Nay, I have not been married either. There were some… 
distractions… throughout the millennia, but…”

“Was Erestor such a distraction?” Glorfindel hoped he wasn’t pushing 
it, but he had to know where Haldir stood in this matter.

Haldir’s gaze softened. “For some time I was in love with Erestor, but as 
he is already bound to someone, our love never stood a chance. We 
always knew the day would come when our paths would separate.”

“And he agrees with that?” Glorfindel still wasn’t sure what to make of 
Erestor. 

“Erestor told me to find out if the attraction was mutual and if it was, 
he wanted me to seduce you,” said Haldir, amused when Glorfindel’s 
eyes widened. “He wants me to be happy.”

“And he would not continue to be a distraction to you?” Glorfindel had 
a few more questions for Haldir and wanted them answered before 
giving this marriage proposal any real thought. 

“Erestor is a good friend, and the Valar know he needs more friends. It 
is hard to describe what I feel for him. I love him, but no longer as a 
lover. He has become… like a brother to me.”

“Speaking of Erestor…” Glorfindel carefully considered his next 
question. “You mentioned him being bound, then where is his mate? 
Shouldn’t his mate be there for him in these trying times?”

Haldir growled softly, wondering how to answer that one without 
having to lie to Glorfindel. “The baby’s father is not available at the 
moment.”

Glorfindel raised an eyebrow at the evasive answer, but allowed it. “If I 
agreed to this marriage…” Suddenly he didn’t know how to phrase this.

“Are you inquiring about my abilities as a lover?” Haldir studied 
Glorfindel’s last move and then took the Balrog Slayer’s Knight. 

Glorfindel groaned, having lost an important piece to the march 
warden. He was losing the game!

“I have been told I have a very talented tongue,” said Haldir, hoping to 
do away with Glorfindel’s nervousness. “I would be more than willing 
to demonstrate should I win this game.”

“Damn you! How can I concentrate when you continue to say things 
like that!” Glorfindel had made a move and had now lost another piece 
to Haldir. “You are distracting me.”

“I can distract you in much more enjoyable ways,” hinted Haldir. 

Glorfindel gulped, when one of Haldir’s hands found its way under the 
table to squeeze his knee. Distracted, he moved his Queen. 

Haldir saw the move and realized he had won. But before declaring 
victory, he moved his hand further up Glorfindel’s thigh to cup the 
other Elf’s groin. “So what do you say, Glorfindel of Gondolin, do you 
accept my marriage proposal?”

“Forever is a long time,” mumbled Glorfindel, growing erect now that 
Haldir was kneading his member. “Especially being married to you.”

“I do have some good character traits… At least I have been told so.” 
Haldir gave Glorfindel a wink, feeling the blond grow aroused beneath 
his fingers. 

Glorfindel closed his eyes in bliss, wondering what else Haldir wanted 
to do with him. “’Tis unexpected.”

“But we both crave this and I do think we are evenly matched. I doubt 
we would regret taking this step.” Haldir, sobering, removed his hand 
and took Glorfindel’s Queen. 

Glorfindel stared at the board in utter disbelief. Haldir had actually 
won! 

Creating some distance between them, Haldir pushed back his chair 
and watched Glorfindel closely. “Or do you require more time to 
consider this marriage proposal?”

Glorfindel was surprised that Haldir wasn’t gloating because he had just 
won. Studying the hazel eyes, he read respect and honor in them, a 
fierce desire to protect, and to right all wrongs. They were the same in 
many ways. /From one warrior to another… We would understand one 
another without words./

Remaining motionless was one of the hardest things Haldir had ever 
done, but if Glorfindel needed time to consider this, he was going to 
give it to the Elda. But the longer the silence lasted, the more worried 
he became that he would get a ‘nay’ for an answer. 

Glorfindel studied Haldir in turn. The guardian was beautiful on the 
inside and out – worthy of him. “I accept.”

Haldir’s eyes burned with pleasure. “You will never regret that 
decision.” Pushing his chair further away from the table, he rose from 
it and went to stand in front of his new lover. Extending his right hand, 
he invited Glorfindel to rise as well. 

After drawing in a deep breath, Glorfindel got to his feet. “But I will 
never yield.”

Haldir laughed warmly. “You lost the game, my love.”

Glorfindel’s eyes darkened at being reminded of that. “And what 
reward do you claim?”

“Let us start with a kiss.” Haldir placed a hand at the nape of his lover’s 
neck and slowly guided Glorfindel’s lips to his. He wasn’t sure just how 
much experience his lover had when it came to lovemaking and was 
looking for signs that would tell him. 

Glorfindel allowed Haldir to guide him in this, although his instincts 
told him to take control of the situation. Pulling his head back slightly, 
he savored the sensation of Haldir’s soft lips against his and when a 
tongue nudged against his teeth, he instinctively parted them. The kiss 
was unique in his experience, and it made him weak in the knees. 
Haldir certainly was a talented kisser!

Haldir tightened his hold on Glorfindel by slipping an arm around the 
blond’s waist. Glorfindel’s essence was melting against his tongue and 
he wanted to taste a lot more of his Balrog Slayer. 

Glorfindel’s eyes fastened on Haldir’s, reading the desire in them and 
he wondered what would happen next. Maybe now was the time to tell 
Haldir something his lover should know before they took this further. 
“Haldir?”

“Yes, my love?” Haldir delighted in running the tip of his tongue down 
Glorfindel’s throat, teasingly licking below his Adams apple. 

“I have not… been with a male in this way before…” Sparks of desires 
erupted in his groin, feeling Haldir flick his tongue against his throat. 
Moaning his need, Glorfindel rested his back against the wall for 
support. 

“I already thought so,” whispered Haldir seductively into Glorfindel’s 
ear. “You can trust yourself to me.”

“But… I still refuse… to yield,” panted Glorfindel, who had closed his 
eyes to focus on the feel of Haldir nibbling on an earlobe.

“Do not worry. We won’t go all the way tonight. I want to take my 
time when making love with you.” But he was hard and in desperate 
need of release, and judging by the feel of Glorfindel’s hard flesh 
pressing against his thigh, his lover was in the same predicament. “May 
I free you from your leggings?” Haldir suspected this passion between 
them would never extinguish. There was something extremely sexy 
about his Balrog Slayer and he hoped he pleased Glorfindel in turn. 

“You may… if I may do the same to you.” Glorfindel forced his eyes 
open and lost himself in the sparkling hazel eyes. “Ai, you are so 
beautiful, Haldir. So passionate.”

“I told you that I did have some good character traits,” teased Haldir, 
running his tongue down his lover’s throat while undoing the top 
buttons of the shirt Glorfindel was wearing. At the same time, he 
managed to undo the lacing of the blond’s leggings and slid one hand 
inside. 

Glorfindel purred and arched his back, involuntarily thrusting against 
Haldir, who now claimed his lips again, locking them in a passionate 
kiss. He briefly fumbled with Haldir’s leggings, but then managed to 
free the other’s erection. Haldir moaned into his mouth when his 
aroused flesh was set free and that little sound made Glorfindel even 
more eager for Haldir’s touch. 

Kissing each other breathless, Glorfindel mewed softly, feeling Haldir’s 
fingers lock around his shaft. The slow, yet firm pace that Haldir set 
would quickly bring him to orgasm. Not wanting to leave his lover 
behind, he returned the favor, stroking Haldir in turn. One of Haldir’s 
hands found its way into his shirt and then rolled a nipple between his 
fingertips, causing Glorfindel to thrust against him. 

Haldir was panting hard, quickly losing the fight not to come yet and 
he arched his back, finding release in Glorfindel’s hand. Crushing his 
lover’s lips in a maddening kiss, he passionately suckled the tip of the 
blond’s tongue. 

Feeling the hot cream splash onto his hand, Glorfindel took control of 
the kiss. Pressing his body against Haldir’s, he thrust into his lover’s 
hand. It was the stimulation he needed to reach orgasm and he sagged 
against Haldir, finally finding release. 

Haldir wasn’t prepared to support Glorfindel when the Elda collapsed 
against him and they went down on their knees, holding each other 
tightly. Haldir was the first to laugh warmly, hearing Glorfindel’s soft 
purrs of delight. Supporting one another, Haldir cupped Glorfindel’s 
chin in the palm of his hand and their gazes met. “Ah, our marriage 
will be interesting indeed.”

Glorfindel giggled, holding Haldir tight. “You surprised me.”

“And I still have to demonstrate to you how talented my tongue really 
is.” As if to prove his point, he stuck out his tongue and wiggled it, 
grinning wickedly. 

Glorfindel, unable to act serious, doubled over with laughter. He 
couldn’t remember the last time laughing had felt this good. “You may 
demonstrate that the next time you ravage me, my husband to be.”

Haldir beamed, being addressed as such. “Something tells me it won’t 
be long before we will fully consummate our marriage.”

“But I won’t yield,” said Glorfindel, snickering softly and wiping tears 
of mirth from his eyes.

“We will see about that,” whispered Haldir wickedly, placing one more 
kiss on Glorfindel’s lips. “Maybe I will yield instead.”


Heart in Chains
Part 22



Elrond kept a watchful eye on Erestor’s food intake during dinner. 
Each time the other Elf tried to push his plate away – after just a few 
bites – he would raise an eyebrow, and that was enough to convince 
Erestor to continue eating, for which Elrond was grateful. He couldn’t 
and didn’t want to lecture Erestor on not eating properly in front of his 
entire household. 

Instead, he tried to catch Erestor’s elusive gaze and when he did, he 
smiled warmly, hoping to reassure his obviously nervous guest. /Now 
what can I do to make sure he does not lock himself up in his rooms? I 
want him to explore the house a bit and maybe… Ah, wait. I will invite 
him to join me for my daily walk in the gardens. But not here and now, 
when he already feels uncomfortable./

Elrond looked at Lindir and saw an equally worried expression on his 
friend’s face. When Lindir leaned in closer, Elrond had to strain to hear 
the whisper, which told him Lindir didn’t want Erestor to hear his 
words.

“My Lord, Erestor is wearing the same clothes he wore last night. I 
thought he would have changed out of them as they are covered in dust 
-- and quite frankly, they smell of horse.”

Now that Lindir mentioned it, Elrond had to agree. It seemed a talk was 
in order later.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor had managed to stay out of the conversation at his table and 
continued to hide himself behind his dark hair. He felt incredibly full, 
having eaten everything the cooks had prepared for him. Elrond’s 
arching eyebrow had a lot to do with that. He just couldn’t put down 
his fork when the half-Elf stared at him like that. The baby had also 
kicked him several times and he hoped she was glad he was eating this 
much. However, his huge food intake presented him with a problem 
when he tried to rise once dinner was finished. Embarrassed, he had to 
sit down again, as his stomach began to cramp up. 

“Is anything amiss?” inquired Elrond, concerned at having seen Erestor 
struggle in vain.

“I cannot seem to get up,” whispered Erestor embarrassed. 

“Let me give you a hand, my friend. I will escort you back to your 
rooms.” Elrond rose from his chair and extended his right hand, hoping 
Erestor would take it. Earning Erestor’s trust wouldn’t be easy and 
would take time.

Erestor stared at the offered limb for quite some time, but realized he 
didn’t really have a choice if he wanted to return to his rooms. 
Releasing a strangled sigh, he took hold of Elrond’s hand and allowed 
the Peredhel to pull him to his feet.

Elrond was reminded of Celebrian, who’d had similar problems when 
she had been pregnant with the twins and was eager to help Erestor. 
“Come with me,” he said, guiding Erestor to the doorway. His charge 
was probably happy to leave the crowded hall. 

Erestor managed to keep up with Elrond, as the half-Elf guided him 
through the corridors. He felt heavy and desperately wanted to lie 
down, but they still had a few more minutes of walking ahead of them 
before they would arrive at his quarters. He still wondered why Elrond 
was taking care of him personally. Surely there was another healer who 
could take over Elrond’s task?

“Erestor? May I speak frankly with you?” Erestor tensed at his words, 
his reaction worrying Elrond further. 

Those words nearly made Erestor panic, but he managed to control his 
raging feelings. “What about, my Lord?”

“There is no need for titles now. Please call me Elrond.”

Erestor felt slightly relieved, but still remained on guard, wishing 
Haldir were here to help him. He felt vulnerable and helpless now that 
he had to deal with Elrond alone. 

“I was wondering why you stayed in your rooms all day long. I 
expected you to explore your new home and maybe walk in the 
gardens, where it is cool and shady.” Elrond peeked at Erestor and saw 
that pallor was spreading over the features. 

Erestor wasn’t sure what to say. In the end, he opted for the truth. “I 
want to limit the chances of suffering another miscarriage.”

“And you think that confining yourself to your rooms will assure that?” 
Elrond slowly began to understand his patient’s fears, but there was 
something else he wanted to ask. “I also wondered if you required the 
services of my tailor, now that your… girth… will continue to expand.” 
He congratulated himself on that one. He hoped he had offered his 
services without embarrassing Erestor – not even mentioning the 
smelly robes.

“I…” Erestor gave Elrond a quick, probing look. “I would appreciate 
that.” They had reached his quarters and he rested his hand on the 
doorknob, knowing he owed Elrond an explanation as well as an 
apology. “I am sorry for bringing this horse’s smell to your table.”

“Aiya, you overheard Lindir’s comment.” Elrond wasn’t sure how to 
react to learning that.

“I did, and he is right. I do smell of horse, but… The truth is that I did 
not bring more clothes.”

“Why?” Puzzled, Elrond frowned. “I assumed you knew you were 
going to live here.”

Still opting for the truth, Erestor explained, “Nay, I did not. Haldir only 
told me a few minutes before we left Lothlorien. I did not have any 
time to pack.” Not that he owned much to begin with.

“I will find you robes to wear for tomorrow and I gather you would 
appreciate some underwear and a nightshirt as well?” Elrond suddenly 
realized what a poor host he had been. “I will see to it.”

“Thank you,” whispered Erestor, taken aback.

Elrond felt strangely shy, standing close to Erestor. For some reason he 
wanted to touch the other Elf and he gave in to that need, tenderly 
tucking a strand of raven hair behind a pointed ear. The sudden wave 
of energy that followed when his fingertips made contact with Erestor’s 
skin stunned him, but he pretended not to notice when Erestor 
flinched away from him. /What was that?/ 

The unexpected caress had taken Erestor by surprise, and he couldn’t 
explain the escape of energy either. Maybe it was because the touch 
had been an intended caress to make him feel better? But why would 
he react by sending Elrond part of his life energy? By the Grace of the 
Valar, he had to be more careful in future! Quickly, he took a step away 
from Elrond and let his hair fall in front of his face.

Elrond was tempted to address the energy transfer, but seeing Erestor’s 
reaction he realized it was better not to do so. There was no reason to 
pressure the pregnant Elf for answers; it would only upset him and they 
had time enough to talk about this, as Erestor would stay here for 
several years. “You should rest, but first I would like to ask you to 
accompany me on my daily walk in the gardens tomorrow afternoon. 
Will you join me? I would like to show you the Bruinen, the waterfalls 
and the rose gardens.” Slowly, Elrond’s plans were taking shape. “One 
of my servants will take you to my study.” That way, Erestor wouldn’t 
feel lost when heading there. /And once he is there, I can find some 
task for him. Ah, I know what he can do. He can catalogue Thranduil’s 
lengthy letters. That should keep him busy./ Elrond wanted Erestor to 
remain busy, as the other Elf struck him as someone who easily fell into 
depression. 

“I do not want to be a burden, my Lo—“ Erestor cringed, seeing the 
disapproving glance in Elrond’s eyes. The half-Elf wanted to do away 
with titles. “Elrond,” he finished. The name rolled easily off his lips, but 
the mere fact that he was talking to Elrond made him nervous. He 
prayed to the Valar that Elrond wouldn’t uncover the truth about him.

“You are not a burden,” said Elrond reassuringly. His fingertips itched 
to make contact with Erestor’s skin again, but he controlled himself. “I 
find I enjoy your company.” Erestor’s big eyes stared at him in surprise. 

“How can you enjoy my company?” He had hardly said anything, and 
the little he had said was because Elrond had coaxed it out of him!

Elrond was briefly rendered speechless, stunned by the expression in 
Erestor’s eyes. /You have a very low opinion of yourself, my friend. We 
will change that./ Determined not to get into a discussion now, he said, 
“Lindir will deliver some clothing to you later tonight and he will take 
you to my study after the noon meal, which you *will* eat.”

“I will eat,” said Erestor, sighing. He lowered his eyes and stared at the 
floor. Elrond was acting like his minder, which was a strange 
realization, considering he had taken care of the baby Elrond had been 
millennia ago. 

“Go and rest, Erestor. You are probably tired.” Elrond was determined 
to take very good care of his patient. He waited until Erestor had closed 
the door behind him and then left the corridor, trying to think of more 
ways to reassure Erestor.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erestor had wrapped himself up in large, soft towels after washing up. 
He had decided against bathing in the pool, as he felt tired and he was 
worried that he couldn’t get out by himself. He was drying his hair, 
when he heard the knock on his door. Looking about for his dirty 
robes, he realized he didn’t want to slip into them now that he was 
clean. He sighed, knowing he had to answer the door in his current 
state and shuffled toward the doorway. “Enter?” he called out timidly, 
hoping it was Haldir and not some Elf he didn’t know. 

He pulled the towels closer to his body, seeing it was Lindir, bringing 
the clothes Elrond had promised. The white-haired Elf was struggling 
somewhat with the huge pile of garments he was carrying, and panted 
slightly, depositing the clothes on the chair. “Lord Elrond asked me to 
deliver these to you.”

“Please extend my gratitude to him,” mumbled Erestor from behind his 
damp hair, hoping Lindir would quickly leave again. 

“Could I possibly interest you in some light refreshments before going 
to bed?” Since the cooks had found out they were preparing meals for a 
pregnant Elf, they were especially eager to please and they had already 
given him a tray, which now stood in the corridor. A servant had 
carried it whilst he had struggled with the clothes.

Erestor could tell by Lindir’s expression that the white-haired Elf 
hoped he would accept the offer. Unable to refuse, he nodded. “Yes, 
please, I would like some.” But he still felt full from dinner. Seeing 
Lindir step into the corridor and return with a tray, he realized Lindir 
had already brought the refreshments along. It did make him wonder 
why everyone was fussing over him. 

“I will leave you alone now, but please contact me, or a servant, if there 
is anything you need. Lord Elrond wants you to be comfortable here.” 
Lindir smiled, bowed slightly and closed the door behind him when he 
left.

Erestor sat down on a chair and shook his head. Haldir, Rumil and 
Orophin had fussed over him before, but they had a reason to do so, as 
he had once saved Orophin’s life. However, he had done nothing of the 
kind for these Elves.

Realizing he was slowly driving himself insane by thinking this way, he 
chose a nightshirt from the pile of clothes and slipped into it. The 
fabric breathed a fragrance of roses, which made him smile. 

The tray Lindir had brought still stood on the table, and he gave it a 
curious look. There was water in a beautifully crafted carafe, fruits and 
biscuits. He couldn’t resist temptation and slipped a piece of apple into 
his mouth, sucking on the slice of fruit and relishing the sweet and sour 
taste. He drank some water and then took the biscuits with him to the 
bed.

After lying down, he pushed the pillows behind him so they supported 
him whilst lying down and then nibbled on a biscuit. Aye, he was 
happy here, but happiness never lasted, at least not in his case. It made 
him wonder what would happen to ruin his bliss. 

When he finally fell asleep, a frown was deeply etched onto his brow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Glorfindel gave Haldir an amused look. After their ‘passionate’ 
escapade, they had enjoyed a quick bath and then the march warden 
had simply acquired his best shirt and most comfortable leggings, 
which the silver-haired Elf was wearing now. “Are you leaving?” 
Glorfindel had noticed that Haldir was making for the doorway, which 
puzzled him. He had assumed they would play some more chess and 
talk through the night before Haldir would finally leave.  

Haldir smiled apologetically. “I need to check on Erestor. He feels out 
of place and that worries me.”

“Would you mind if I joined you?” Glorfindel slipped into his boots and 
walked over to Haldir. “I find myself curious when it comes to this Elf.”

“Only if you promise to behave.” Haldir said the words with a smile 
accompanying them, but the expression in his eyes said that he meant 
it. “Erestor is easily intimidated and I would love for the two of you to 
become friends. I do not want you to start off on the wrong foot.”

“I will behave,” promised Glorfindel, growing more curious with every 
passing minute. “I will be charming.”

“You had better.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haldir sat down on the side of Erestor’s bed, careful not to wake the 
sleeping Elf. He didn’t know when it had happened, but a healthy 
blush had appeared on Erestor’s face and there were even some biscuit 
crumbs in his hair. “He finally started to eat.”

“Did you worry about that?” Glorfindel studied Erestor closely when 
Haldir gently pushed a sleeve up, so he could see the skinny arms. “I 
understand.”

Haldir licked his lips, needing to confide in his new lover. “When he 
lost the twins he withdrew into himself for nearly three millennia. We 
were unable to reach him, but we always continued to care for him.”

“Three millennia?” Glorfindel’s eyes widened in shock. 

“He was mourning their deaths,” added Haldir, whilst soothingly 
stroking the long, raven hair. 

“And where was his bonded mate then?” asked Glorfindel, unable to 
keep the disapproval from his voice. What kind of Elf abandoned a 
mate in need?

“Unavailable. My brothers and I took care of him, as well as Lord 
Celeborn. Maybe now you understand why I am this worried about 
him.”

“I am beginning to understand,” said Glorfindel in a soft tone. “He has 
suffered much, then?”

“Too much, but he seems to be improving now. I always thought that 
getting him away from Lothlorien would help.”

“Lothlorien?” Haldir’s last comment slightly confused Glorfindel. 

“Galadriel is not fond of him and we often had to protect him from her 
scheming. But now that he is here, she no longer has any influence on 
him.”

Glorfindel knew he missed several important pieces of this puzzle. Now 
that Haldir mentioned that Galadriel had some hold on Erestor, he 
realized he should connect it with something or someone else. But he 
felt lost.

“Ha… Hal… dir?” Sleepy eyes regained a mist of awareness, but Erestor 
didn’t fully awaken, as he felt safe, knowing Haldir close. “Missed… 
you.” 

Haldir leaned in closer and pressed a chaste kiss on the top of Erestor’s 
head. He couldn’t tell if that action vexed Glorfindel, as the Elda’s face 
remained unchanged, but he hoped his new lover understood that he 
couldn’t just stop reassuring and touching Erestor when the other 
needed it so much. “That is why I am here now. How was your day? 
Did you leave your rooms at all?”

Glorfindel felt a brief stab of jealousy, seeing the care and affection 
with which Haldir stroked Erestor’s hair, but then he reminded himself 
that the pregnant Elf had suffered greatly in the past, and he assumed 
Erestor had only made it because of Haldir. In the state of half-sleep 
Erestor was in, the dark-haired Elf didn’t seem to notice him and he 
stepped further away from the bed, realizing he could scare Erestor if 
the Elf noticed him unexpectedly. 

“Aye, I… did…” Erestor snuggled deeper into the pillows, relaxed and 
still half asleep. “Elrond… came for me…”

Haldir smiled, knowing the interest Elrond showed was more 
important than Erestor wanted him to believe. “And did you talk to 
him?”

“Nay… eat,” said Erestor, yawning. “He made me…eat…”

“That is good.” Haldir continued to stroke the long strands of hair, 
knowing more information would follow shortly, and Erestor didn’t 
disappoint him. 

“He walked me… back to my…rooms. Had clothes… delivered… and 
more food…” A giddy smile spread over his face. “Wants me to walk 
with him… tomorrow… His study…” 

Haldir gave Erestor a warm and hopeful smile, briefly forgetting about 
Glorfindel’s presence. “It sounds like he likes you, lirimaer.”

“Do you think… so?” Erestor’s smile broadened and he pushed deeper 
into the comfort of his pillows. “I would… like that.”

“I know you would. Now go back to your dreams, Erestor. It sounds 
like you had a tiring – and exciting – day.” Seeing that Erestor’s eyes 
were filling with reverie again, he smiled warmly and tucked the 
blanket tightly around Erestor’s form. 

“He seems very fond of Elrond,” commented Glorfindel thoughtfully. 
That was something he hadn’t expected.

Haldir bit his bottom lip. He didn’t feel like he had the right to tell 
Glorfindel about Erestor’s secrets. That was something Erestor had to 
do himself. “Erestor has led a very secluded life and such kindness from 
a stranger is unfamiliar to him.”

“That must have been a very lonely life, considering he suffered a 
miscarriage and then withdrew into himself for such a long time.” He 
felt sympathy for Erestor and slowly began to comprehend why Haldir 
was this affectionate around the raven-haired Elf. “He has suffered 
much.”

“Aye, and I hope that now he is in Imladris that things will change. I 
hope he will be happy here, but he cannot accomplish that alone. He 
will need friends.”

“I would be more than happy to offer him my friendship,” said 
Glorfindel, nodding his head. “I mean it, Haldir. He will have a friend 
in me.”

Haldir carefully rose from the bed after making sure Erestor was still 
soundly asleep. “Thank you for extending your friendship to Erestor. It 
means a lot to me.”

Glorfindel gracefully accepted the kiss that Haldir placed on his lips. 
Working together with Elrond, they would find a way to make 
Erestor’s life less lonely and more enjoyable.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning Erestor woke up feeling comfortable in his own little 
nest. He could get used to sleeping amidst these luxurious pillows. His 
eyes widened, hearing his stomach growl and one minute later, the 
baby kicked – hard. “I gather that means you are hungry?” Another 
kick seemed to confirm his question.

As on cue, someone knocked on his door. “Who is it?” His left leg was 
cramping badly and he struggled into a sitting position. When had his 
abdomen become this huge? 

“’Tis I, Lindir. I bring breakfast.”

Erestor groaned his displeasure, unable to push himself to his feet. “I 
am sorry, but I cannot open the door.” At that moment, his lower back 
decided to cramp up as well, and he sagged into the pillows with a 
startled yelp.

Lindir heard the yelp and immediately opened the door. Worried for 
the pregnant Elf’s well-being, he rushed inside and placed the tray on 
the table before heading for the bed. “Is anything amiss? Do you want 
me to alert Lord Elrond?”

“Nay, that won’t be necessary. ‘Tis cramps. I cannot get to my feet.” 
Erestor knew he had to ride out the cramps before trying to rise again. 
So he lay back and hoped Lindir would quickly leave him again.

Lindir felt helpless. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

“A massage would be nice,” the words escaped Erestor before he had 
thought them through. He was seldom sarcastic, but this was one of 
those times.

“I can do that. Where are the cramps located?” Lindir began to roll up 
his sleeves so they wouldn’t be in the way.

Erestor’s eyes widened in alarm. “No! I was only thinking aloud!”

“But I meant what I said. If it helps relieve the cramps, I will massage 
the affected areas.”

Erestor couldn’t stop staring at the white-haired Elf. Why was Lindir 
offering such a thing? He couldn’t accept the offer anyway. He wasn’t 
used to strangers touching him. It was only Haldir and his brothers, 
whom he would allow to massage him in such an intimate way. “I 
thank you for your kind offer, but I cannot accept.”

Lindir’s first reaction was to pressure Erestor into revealing why the 
dark-haired Elf was so uncomfortable with the idea of a simple 
massage, but reconsidered, seeing the startled look in the chocolate 
eyes. “In that case we will wait until the cramps have passed so I may 
help you to your feet.” Realizing Erestor felt embarrassed by the whole 
situation, Lindir walked over to the clothes he had dropped off the 
evening before and began to hang them in the closet.

Erestor appreciated what Lindir was doing and briefly closed his eyes. 
The cramps were already lessening, but his stomach continued to 
growl, and there was another kick of his baby, urging him to feed 
himself.

After five minutes – just when Lindir had finished putting away the 
borrowed robes – Erestor made another effort to get to his feet. Before 
he knew what was happening, Lindir had folded an arm around him 
and was carefully helping him to his feet. “Thank you.”

“No thanks are needed,” said Lindir, carefully steering Erestor toward 
the breakfast tray. He judged it important that Erestor ate.

“Bathroom first… please,” requested Erestor in a soft, embarrassed 
tone. It was getting harder for him to maintain control of his bladder, 
now that the baby was growing and pushing on his internal organs.

“Of course!” Lindir changed direction and safely delivered Erestor to 
the bathroom.

Erestor closed the door behind him, pushed the nightshirt out of the 
way and then… /I am growing so large that I cannot even see my feet, 
let alone my penis./ Overcome by self-loathing, he bowed his head, 
unable to face his reflection in the mirror. Camfael had warned him 
that there would be mood swings, but until now he hadn’t taken that 
warning seriously.

“Erestor? Is everything well?” Lindir, concerned now that Erestor was 
taking an awfully long time in the bathroom, knocked on the door. 

“I will be out in a moment.” Erestor sighed sorrowfully, and after 
relieving himself, slipped the nightshirt back into place. Gathering his 
courage, he opened the door and faced Lindir. 

“Now, eat.” Lindir eyed Erestor when he made his way over to the 
table, ready to steady him in case he swayed.

Erestor sat down and sipped his tea, cringing when he noticed that 
Lindir was preparing several slices of bread with marmalade and honey. 
Lindir even put honey in his tea when the white-haired Elf refilled his 
cup. 

“May I lay out your clothes for today?” offered Lindir, eager to help. 

Erestor swallowed hard. Not even his clothes were his own. “That 
would be helpful, thank you.”

“As I said earlier, there is no reason to keep thanking me. I like doing 
this for you.” Lindir opened the closet and selected burgundy robes, 
made from a light material that wouldn’t add to the weight Erestor was 
already carrying. He added comfortable shoes, gathering Erestor might 
suffer from swollen ankles before the day was through. He placed 
everything on the bed. “Is there another way I can be of assistance?”

“Nay, th—“ Erestor was stopped short when Lindir gave him a 
meaningful look, telling him to stop thanking him. “I do not think so. I 
will take a shower, get dressed and…”

Lindir realized Erestor had no idea how to occupy himself during the 
morning. “Maybe you would like to read in the library? That is until I 
come to fetch you to meet with Lord Elrond.”

“The library?” Erestor liked that idea. There would be books on herb 
lore and healing in the library. “Aye, I will do that.”

“Good. I will return in an hour. That should give you ample time to 
shower and dress. I will escort you to the library, where I will collect 
you when it is time to go to Lord Elrond’s study.” Lindir was pleased 
with himself. That way Erestor wouldn’t get a chance to brood. 

Erestor realized he had better give in and comply. What was it that set 
these Imladris Elves apart from the ones in Lothlorien? They were 
kinder, more supportive. /Except for Haldir, Rumil, Orophin, Celeborn 
and Camfael that is. They always treated me well./ 

He suddenly realized that Lindir and Elrond had managed to fill most 
of his day with activities. And he didn’t really mind. Maybe that way, 
he would be able to get to know them better. He desperately wanted 
for them to like him. 



Heart in Chains
Part 23



‘Tell me, Haldir, do you enjoy sleeping in the open?” Glorfindel had 
much to think about after the visit they had paid Erestor and he needed 
to see the moon and stars above him tonight. 

Haldir arched an elegantly curved eyebrow. “I do, though I try to keep 
my nights in the open limited when I have access to a comfortable 
bed.”

“Would you sleep under the stars with me tonight?” Glorfindel smiled 
sweetly. 

“If you desire so,” said Haldir, a bit surprised, but willing to give in to 
his new lover. He allowed Glorfindel to guide him to the Bruinen, 
where the Elda showed him a comfortable spot in the soft, thick grass. 
Lying down, he found he had an excellent view of the river and the 
stars twinkled brightly above them. 

Glorfindel moved about until he was also comfortable and then 
wrapped his arms around his lover’s waist, spooning behind him. He 
was slightly surprised when Haldir pushed back against him, obviously 
enjoying the position they were in. “You can sleep peacefully here. No 
need to remain on guard. I make sure Imladris’ borders are patrolled 
and no Orc will ever find a way inside.”

Haldir frowned at the tone. “You say that as if you have a personal 
grudge against them.”

“I have. After what they did to the Lady Celebrian and her escort, I feel 
like slaying all of them; rather painfully, I should add.”

“I saw Celeborn grieve for his daughter, aye. He was sorry to have her 
sail for Aman.” 

Now it was Glorfindel’s turn to be puzzled. “Celeborn only? What 
about Galadriel?”

Haldir turned in the embrace until they w