Title: What You Leave Behind: Part One - Maldulin Author: Rion Pairing: Legolas/Elrond implied. Rating: PG-13. For Languaged used. Disclaimer: Not Mine. All Tolkiens. I make no cash. Oh, lyrics belong to Sarah McLachlan...such a pretty voice. Warning: Mild Language, angst, abandonment of a child, and MPREG. Dun like it. Tough. Deal with it. Author's note: Uh, kinda sorta based on a rp I did. I came up with the basic story line and some people kind of adopted me. Legsie gets tossed around and kinda goes through a bit of a breakdown. (relates much to real-life experiences I've had with my lover.) Kinda used Lyrics from my fave song too. Feedback: Yes, please. -~* What You Leave Behind Part One: Maldulin*~- The Crowned Prince of Mirkwood, Legolas Thranduilion, rode towards the last Elven Refuge of Imladris with immense haste. He had to see Elrond Half-elven, twas imparative. The subject of such importance rested nicely in his arms. His newly born son, Maldulin. He looked down briefly at the wriggle bundle-of-so- called-joy and frowned. He'd been running ever since his father caught wind of the pregnancy. Legolas did not tell the king who was the father of his babe. Elrond's honor was safe in that regard. He had naught but ill feelings of going to Imladris. He didn't know what sort of welcome he would recieve. Legolas looked off into the distance and saw the spires of Imladris' towers. The City of Elves was fast approaching. Best put on a brave face, Legolas. You're in for it now. He took a deep breath and sped on, blowing past the gate patrols and towards the stables. It had been a rather long trip from Mirkwood. His thoughts dwelled on current situation. He looked downward at the small baby in his arms. To some, it was simply impossible to believe that a male could concieve, but that was a Human perspective. It was widely known among the Elfkind that a rare few of their males could concieve children. A survival trait. To assist in perpetuating the species. He never thought he'd be one of those lucky few males who had the ability. He should've been more careful in his escapades. He'd been ridiculed just about everywhere he went during the pregnancy, now it was over and everything was okay. He had no regrets, though he lied about the child's parentage, that he'd regret. Legolas smiled slightly and cuddled his baby son to his chest. He kept the child mostly hidden from view so no one would see his son. They would ask questions. Like, how the hell did he go from warrior-prince of Mirkwood...to being father-of-the-year? He frowned and shook his head. It sounded odd to him. He never seemed, or looked the type, to have children. Now, he had a child. It frightened him beyond measure. So much uncertainty. He clutched the baby protectively, soothingly, and whispered, "It's okay...It'll be okay...Everything will be okay..." He wasn't sure if it was to sooth him so much as the baby. He sighed and brought his horse to a stop in front of the stables. One of the stable- boys took the reins for him as he dismounted, then led the horse inside. The Prince closed his eyes a moment and took a deep breath, then looked down at his newborn son. A soft look crossed his face as the love for his son surfaced, then he frowned briefly. All this fatherhood nonsensce was going to his head. He looked down at his own flesh and blood, his son. He frowned more. How could he ever think of having a child? He gently caressed the soft downy head of his son, then leaned down and kissed the baby's petal soft cheek. He stood there for a few moments, just staring at the tiny babe in his arms, then looked up at the Last Homely House. He sighed and began walking towards it, again, not sure of the sort of welcome he would recieve. He should just leave the baby here with Elrond and leave Middle-Earth forever. The child would never know of Legolas or how he came into the world. And that would probably be for the best. Elrond could give the child a life that Legolas could not. Said Prince of Mirkwood knew naught of child rearing. He had no younger brother's or sisters in which to care for. He was the baby. His father's little Greenleaf. Well, Little Greenleaf fucked up big time this round. He sighed and rolled his eyes, shifting the baby in his arms some. The tiny elfling made an indignant sound in response, but Legolas ignored it. Some father... Legolas had found it rather difficult to explain to most who asked him how the pregnancy happened and how he felt about it, so he didn't. He pretended he couldn't speak the common tongue. He got pregnant because he was one of the few elven men that could bear children and his lover, *cough* Elrond, had not been careful enough. But then again, who could when in the throes of passion? Legolas sighed again, still exhausted from the birth, and held his newborn elfling. He watched the child wriggle in his arms and felt his heart begin to ache. He approached the House of Elrond slowly, walking up the steps with a ginger, nimble step. He stood before the doors, then set his child down upon the steps, bundled warmly. He was going to leave his son, "Namarie..Maldulin..." He turned and began walking away. He had every intention of just leaving the baby there, alone. It would probably be days before someone came out and found him. By then the child would be dead, and so would he. He began cursing every step he took away from his child. He was going to kill, indirectly, his own flesth and blood. What in the name of all that was Green and Good was wrong with him?! He was no better than the blasted Kinslayers of Beleriand. Only he would not get any reprieve as they did. He would be cursed for all eternity. Legolas heard the child cry and he stopped, near tears himself. He turned back towards his child and walked back up the steps. He looked down at his son, then leaned down and picked the baby up. The small child was wailing loudly and Legolas tried to calm him, "Shhh..Dina, meleht-nin...saes...dina....don't cry...Oh for the love of the Valar, please..." He looked around and frowned, where was everybody? He needed help, desperately. He had no food, no drink...no anything to feed his baby...or any diapers. It almost brought Legolas to tears. He growled softly and looked around again, then decided to head inside. He'd find help there. What a sight this must be; a great elven warrior with a baby in his arms. Who would have thought? He made for Elrond's study and pounded on the door. He settled his baby in his arms and stood tall, staring curiously at the wriggling child. He looked down at his baby and sighed softly, then leaned down and kissed the child's forehead, cuddling the baby close as he cried still. "Shhh....Dina, laito-nin, saes. Shhhh! Oh please...stop crying!" Legolas cursed silently at his own lack of knowledge on child-care. He'd done pretty good so far, but he needed help. And Legolas was so tired and so confused. Just then, as if a blessing from the god's, Legolas's poundings were answered. The Lord of Imladris himself opened the door and took one look at the frazzled prince and the screaming infant, then ushered them both inside his study. The Elf-lord took the child from Legolas and looked the child over, then looked up at the Prince, who was practically pulling his hair in frustration. Elrond frowned, "Where did you find him, Legolas-nin?" Legolas laughed, rather sarcastically, "Found, Elrond?! Hardly... you knocked me up!" Elrond gave Legolas an indignant look, "I did nothing...wait..." He looked down at the boy again, then at Legolas, "You...gave birth...to him? And he..is mine?" Obviously the reality stick was just now hitting the Ever wise Elrond. Legolas glared and shouted, "Yes! It's all your fault! All of it...!" Then, the Elven prince lost all composure and fell to the floor, weeping miserably for the first time since discovering the pregnancy. Elrond set the baby on his desk. He had sufficiently calmed the wailing child, and now he had to tend to his lover. He took Legolas into his arms and held the younger, smaller elf close. "Dina, meleth-nin...I will take care of you both, I swear it...Legolas-nin...do not cry...please..." Legolas was naught more than a sobbing mass of Sindarin Elf. Elrond held him close and tight. He had done so much damage and for what? Five minutes of pleasure in the Prince's body? Not worth it, not worth the pain. Now he was saddled with a, more than likely, disowned Elven Prince and another son. Don't get him wrong though! He loved Legolas more than anything...but this isn't how he wanted things to go. He wanted it to be just him and Legolas...but the child was a nice addition. Elrond lifted Legola's face and kissed the Prince's trembling lips tenderly. Legolas kissed back, then wrapped his arms around Elrond's neck, "I meleth le, Elrond...I'm sorry....for everything..." The Prince sniffed and Elrond held him tight. Legolas began to speak then, as if confessing, or praying, "Heaven bend to take my hand and lead me into the fire. Be the long awaited answer to a long and painful fight. Truth be told I tried my best, but somewhere long the way I got caught up in all there was to offer. The cost was so much more than I could bear... Though I've tried, I've fallen. I have sunk so low. I'm messed up, better I should know. So don't tell me I told you so." Elrond listened to the heartfelt words, then replied with his own. It was as if they were reciting poetry..or a tuneless song, "We all begin with good intent, when love is raw and young. We believe we can change ourselves, that the past can be undone. But we carry on our backs the burden time always reveals in the lonely light of morning, in the wounds that would not heal. It's the bitter taste of losing everything you've held so dear." Legolas buried his face in Elrond's robes, clinging tightly, repeating his prayer to his lover, "Heaven bend to take my hand, I've nowhere left to turn. I'm lost to those I thought were friends, to everyone I know. Oh, they turn their heads embarassed, pretend that they don't see that it's one wrong step, one slip before you know, and there doesn't seem to be a way to be redeemed." Elrond sighed and clutched Legolas tighter to him, "There is always redemption, Legolas...always...You find redemption here...in my arms....Stay with me, my love..I'll take care of you and OUR child..." TBC: author suffering from writer's block and horny boyfriend. G'night all. 1:58 am, 20031227.