Title: FOR CONTINUING STRANGE (22)
Author: Annie Harris
Email: annie_mouse2001@yahoo.co.uk
Pairing: Legolas/Gimli
Rating: R.
Summary: Gimli learns something of Legolas' past.
Disclaimer: The usual: No claims, no pack drill - and of course no
profit. Just living in the gaps and round the edges.
Warning: Suffering recalled.
Archive: LoM, Axe & Bow Yahoogroup message archive. Anyone interested
just ask.

22

When Legolas was not with him in the workshop, Gimli spent his time
crafting the mallorn leaf to replace the oak talisman given to the
widow's son. Gimli knew that the Elf felt its absence from the way
his hand would stray to place where it had rested, probably, thought
the Dwarf, for many lifetimes of his kind.

That thought would stop him short whenever some unexpected matter
brought it home to him afresh. He began to think that he felt it with
such shock because Legolas himself made so little of it; and when he
had spoken of a second chance to see spring for the first time, it
had seemed once again that his elven years were somehow a burden in a
mortal world. So he worked on the leaf, made of gilded silver and
green enamel with a crystal dewdrop in the central vein, and hid the
piece away whenever Legolas was about. He finished it one day when
the Elf announced that he would be off on a hunting expedition with
Sam and young Bergil.

He seemed determined to make a mystery of it, but Gimli turned very
dwarvish and refused to rise to the bait, assuming from the choice of
company that the hunt would be conducted through the markets of the
city: but in this he was mistaken; for when the hunting party
returned in the evening to the Dwarf (who was waiting impatiently to
present his finished gift) they had with them nothing more remarkable
than a smallish wooden box with a number of little holes roughly
bored through the lid. It was also clear that the tireless Elf had
almost run the energetic young boy and the travel-hardened Hobbit off
their feet, for they had been out in the groves and fields all day,
and were now returned in triumph with a box full of leaves and ...
ladybirds ... almost three dozen ladybirds! Ladybirds of various
sizes, colours and numbers of spots!

Legolas laughed aloud at the look on Gimli's face when this treasure
was revealed. He was quite baffled by this new piece of, as he
thought, elvish whimsy, and only the bewitching charm of the Elf's
delight in the day's capture prevented him from making acid comments.
He let himself be persuaded to look closely at these living, moving
jewels, and eventually gathered that they had been rounded up to aid
Legolas in his war on the greenfly that were feasting on the plants
in the courtyard and terrace.

'Gardener's friends they are, Gimli,' said Sam; -'That's well known
among Shire folk as well as Elves.'

Gimli had a sudden feeling that Middle-earth was not one world but
many, and that it was possible, in fact quite easy, to find that he
had stepped from one to another without warning. Horses, cattle,
goats, dogs for guarding and hunting, farm cats and miller's cats ...
they were useful animals, all in their way friends of men: but
friends with insects? That was a new idea. He followed Legolas and
Sam around as they released the bright and decorative bugs onto the
plants most in need of care, fascinated almost against his will by
the knowledge, skill and love of living, growing things shared by
these two disparate beings.

Bergil soon went home, fearful of a scolding from his mother for
being away so long, and Sam stayed only until he had prepared a few
things for the evening meal. Gimli saw him off and locked the gate,
hurrying back to find the Elf a picture of domesticity, cutting bread
and setting out the salad stuff that Sam had washed.

They ate in companionable silence, simply glad to be together again,
and as soon as the meal was over, dishes washed and put away, they
strolled across the courtyard to their bedroom. It was not late, and
the evenings were now so light that star-opening was still a couple
of hours away. Legolas no longer wandered at night as he had done
when they first came to the city. Evening and morning he was content
to watch the stars from the courtyard or terrace, and would sleep or
rest all night by Gimli's side.

As soon as the door was closed behind them, Legolas took Gimli in his
arms, stooping his head for a long kiss after a day spent apart. The
warmth and scent of the Dwarf engulfed him - an earthy spiciness,
mingled with leather and the strange smells of the workshop from his
clothes. It wrapped him in a sense of homecoming, then swiftly
vanished below the conscious perception of even sharp elvish senses.
At the same time Gimli nuzzled close to the Elf, savouring his sweet
woodland tang of green growing things, finding the same sense of
comfort and home.

'Gimli?'

'Hmm?'

'I love your smell,' Legolas murmured against his hair; -'But it
seems to vanish so quickly. I don't understand.'

Gimli thought for a moment, then suddenly remembered something from
his long ago experience of love.

'I think it happens when you MATCH someone; when there's no conflict
...'

'There's no conflict between us, but "match"? We are so unlike ...'

'Well then, FIT, like two parts of a whole; you're the other part of
me. So that's why; just as you don't know your own scent.'
'Yes, we fit!'

Legolas' chin rested comfortably on the top of Gimli's head now, as
the Dwarf's arms wrapped tightly round him. Then Gimli said:
'While you were out hunting wild insects, I have not been idle. Would
you like to see?'

'Yes, of course. Have you finished one of your crowns?'

'No, not yet. Something else.'

Gimli began to unfasten the clasps of Legolas' jacket. The Elf
guessed that the something would be for him, but said nothing, and
took the hint to undress, and when he sat naked on the edge of the
bed Gimli, still clothed but now barefoot, brought out from one of
the pockets of his jerkin the little box of dark polished wood that
held the mallorn leaf, and presented it solemnly.

Legolas took the box and slowly opened it, and Gimli watched with joy
the brightening of his face as he saw the gift revealed and then
lifted it by its chain from the black velvet bed. When he had done
turning it about to admire it, he said:
'Crafty one! No wonder you have let me run wild in the meadows or
gossip with Master Bergthor when I might have been your apprentice!
You know you could chain me to your side with a word, yet I never
felt you wished me away.'

Gimli smiled at the fair teasing face.

'I never wished you away but for your own sake, so you never felt
it.'

Legolas set the box down and held the pendant out to Gimli.

'Once you put this about my neck, you must seal the clasp, so that it
shall not come off again. Can you do that?'

'Why, yes. But I know that if you do not wish to take it off, you
never will. Your love will keep it fast.'

'Yes, my Gimli; but I would have it so, for the sake of the hand that
made it, and the love of the Lady.'

'Do you not recall what Aragorn said about casting away treasure at
need?'

'I do: and I say not that there will never be need so great I would
cast away this treasure. But the oak leaf was freely given, and so
will this never be.'

Gimli hesitated, holding the ends of the chain ready to clasp about
the ivory-skinned neck as Legolas lifted his hair in both hands in
readiness. Doubts about the future fell over them like a shadow for
moment.

'Put it on, please.'

Legolas looked steadily into the dark eyes of the Dwarf. 

'Put it on! My heart has left the greenwood as surely as my talisman
is gone from me. I live in a new world now.'

Slowly Gimli moved forward and fastened the chain around Legolas'
neck, catching his sweet scent again as he leaned close. Legolas let
his hair fall, and touched the green and gold leaf to find out how it
lay, just below the pit of his throat, just as the silver oak leaf
had done. He drew a deep breath and let it out in a long sigh, then
moved suddenly, to stretch himself out on the dark green coverlet,
arms spread, inviting, clad in nothing but the green leaf and his own
beauty.

Gimli leaned over him and ran a trail of kisses down his chest, which
inevitably caused a lot of delightful tickling from the beard, before
shedding his clothes and joining him on the bed.

The gift of the leaf had proved to be a more serious matter than he
had expected, bringing questions of what they might have to face in
the future., but now Gimli caressed the Elf  gently, running his
warm, work hardened hand down the smooth flank and hip, stroking and
admiring. Legolas lay quite still and smiled at him under half-closed
lashes. Already Gimli knew a lot more about the Elf, about the
behaviour of his mysterious body, and had found, with surprise that
he soon realised was misplaced, that the quietness of the Elf's
responses was not a measure of the strength of his feelings; that the
simplest touches, or even words alone, could rouse him to bliss; and
that the focus of pleasure was sometimes in the expected place and
sometimes diffused through the whole of his body while his manhood
seemed to sleep.

Now that he was coming to understand what he saw and felt, Gimli
could read the signs: Legolas' skin would grow gradually warmer, and
the pale, even, opaque ivory colouring would change to a subtle,
glowing, almost translucent rose-agate tint, revealing delicate
bluish veins, and would fade slowly back to ivory after satisfaction.
Gimli began to think that Legolas and those of his kind who suffered
the fate of the late-born were not so much losers by the
unpredictable sleep of the flesh as one might imagine. Something else
was being given to them instead, or so it seemed to him. He let his
hair trail across the Elf's face and chest, always sure to please
him, and saw the fair rosy colouring begin to rise. It was a sight of
such enchanting beauty that at times his own desire would be
forgotten for a while until he had taken his fill of watching the
Elf's pleasure.

But this time Legolas was saying:
'With me, please, together!'

He drew Gimli close, strong fingers sweeping down his spine, legs
twining about him, tongue searching in every kiss. Simply knowing the
force of his desire was enough to send Gimli over the edge, and they
rolled together in the sparkling darkness of love's delight.
Eventually Legolas rose and fetched a cloth from the wash-stand.
Gimli gave a little yelp of surprise at the cold damp touch on his
belly, then smiled up at the Elf leaning over him, the leaf pendant
swinging gently. They slid under the covers and curled together as
the daylight faded. Gimli touched the pendant lightly.

'Should I have asked you first? It was more than just an adornment,
was it not?'

'Somewhat more, yes; not so important as the circlet of leaves - I
could not give that away.'

'But your father will be angry?'

'Hmm. Displeased, possibly, no more.'

'He'll be angry about me!'

'No doubt of that!'

But Legolas laughed and went on:
'He has a cousin, in Lindon, who was his heir, until I was born. And
now, I have been offered a place in Ithilien, as well as a home in
your heart. And even so, how long will the Greenwood have room for an
elven king, now the age of Men begins? All will yet be well. But your
father, Gimli?'

'Ach! I do not think of it! Things will go as they will. If he
pursues me with his axe, I shall fight him. Yet I say wait and see.
Meeting trouble halfway makes it certain.'

'You sound so calm - I love that.'

'What use in being anything else?'

Legolas snuggled against him, head on his shoulder.

'Legolas?'

'Hmm?''

'Can those Elves who once had children have them no longer?'

'That's so. Elves have always been able to choose when to  conceive,
but now they cannot. It is part of the fading.'

He was surprised to hear Gimli stifle what seemed like a snort of
mirth.

'But that is only reasonable! Since elves do not naturally die - yes,
I know very many of your kind have been slain or taken by the Enemy- 
but, if things had gone as they were surely planned  there must come
a time when they will not naturally be born, otherwise ...'

He paused, hoping Legolas would grasp his meaning before he had to
say anything unacceptable: and to his lasting credit the Elf suddenly
saw things in a new light:
'Otherwise we would be more like rabbits in Sam's cabbage patch!'

Gimli gave a shout of relieved laughter. That was putting it far more
strongly than he would ever have dared.

'So that is why you find my late-born body neither maimed nor
ridiculous; it is 'reasonable'!'

'Well, yes; you are as you must be, though perhaps the change in your
senses should not have happened until you left Middle-earth.'

Legolas was silent for a while. Clearly he had never considered
matters in this way, which surprised Gimli, but when he spoke, he had
evidently been thinking of the 'rabbits in a cabbage patch' aspect of
things.

'You spoke of the Elves who have died in Middle-earth; but did you
know that such may be given new bodies, if Namo will and they will,
and so continue their lives in the Blessed Realm? And one at least
has returned into Middle-earth: Glorfindel whom you saw in the House
of Elrond. Your dwarvish reason is not so wide of the mark, I think,
though some of our number were lost to the Enemy long ago in other
ways, and none can tell their end ...'

Gimli understood that he was thinking of the origin of the Orcs, and
could say nothing on the matter.

'Legolas, the more I know of you, and the more my 'dwarvish reason'
tries to understand you, the more you are a mystery - enough to keep
the most inquisitive Dwarf happy all his days!'

Then Gimli saw Legolas' expression change to a piercing earnest.

'And you accept me, late-born, a mystery, and love me as I am.'

'That I do, my Elf. You said it yourself, you are you: Legolas; you
cannot be other than you are, and that 'you' I love.'

'My gentle Gimli! Now I know what I have long sought: one to love me
just as I am.'

Gimli turned a little and looked at him.

'How could anyone love you, except as you are? Can love be
otherwise?'

'Oh, Gimli, how can I explain? Yes, as you have guessed, I have loved
before: once, I believed, truly. But I was deceived, or, as I now
think, I deceived myself. '

Gimli listened in alarmed silence, wondering what he might hear next.
'He was a Man, a mortal, a great warrior from a kingdom long
vanished, and I but a young Elf. He was of the blood of Numenor, not
unlike Elessar in appearance, but most unlike in heart and mind. He
was fierce, proud and, alas, cruel, yet a skilful warrior who
scarcely knew the name of fear, and was highly honoured in his land.
I understand now that I met in him a shadow, faint yet still
dangerous, of that power by which Sauron deceived his forebears and
made them his followers in Numenor; a power sprung from that of the
Enemy who caused the fall of the Noldor in Aman. 

He was ungentle from the first, mocking my elvish nature if I
complained of hurt, envying and angered by elvish length of life. I
would not let myself see that he was one to crush what he could not
enjoy.

I went with him after a feast - he had taken too much wine, and was
rough and boastful, and I soon began to fear that he had despised me
even while he desired, but I would not believe it, until he took me,
roughly and unprepared. It was violation, but I had consented, and I
did not die. Instead I found my anger, and I found my strength; I
threw him across the room and fled. I may have dashed his brains out
against the wall, I do not know. I returned to my own people. I never
saw or heard of him again, and, whatever befell, he is dead many
generations of men and his land forgotten.'

Though he had spoken with almost exaggerated elvish calm, Legolas now
seemed breathless with the memory of his struggle and escape. Before
Gimli could speak, he went on:
'Elves heal quickly in the body, but other wounds last longer. My
father and my friends asked no more than I was willing to tell. Those
were grievous times. Pain and sorrow were no strangers. to any of us
But now it is you, Gimli, who bring me to recovery.'

Then he slipped into the tender formality of address reserved for the
deepest feelings:
'When I came to thee chilled to the bone by the death of the child, I
saw thee look on me with desire, and put it aside out of very love
and kindness towards me. Thou art the first that looked, and saw, and
understood, and held me as an equal. And now thou knowest more of me
than any has known, and wouldst not change me. Thou dost love and
desire and yet wilt let me be.'

'I can do no other, fair one. Thou hast given me a gift unheard of,
that a Dwarf should find a second mate. I cannot think to fault one
who bestowed this treasure: it would come close to rejecting the
gift.'

'This binds me closer to thee alone,' said Legolas, - 'My star of
earth, I will follow thee.'

'And I tell thee, Legolas, that in the Northern tongue wherein we
take our names, mine does indeed mean 'Star'.'

Gimli felt, rather than saw, the Elf sit up suddenly in the near
darkness, and could just discern the pale face gazing down at him.
Legolas laid one hand on the Dwarf's chest.

'This was meant to be,' he said softly, and sank back down against
Gimli's side. - 'This was meant to be; my star.'

Gimli's arms closed round him, and he lay close, murmuring 'Meant to
be' several times more until he fell asleep.

Gimli lay awake for some time, feeling the Elf's soft breathing
against his shoulder, and wondering at the sad tale that his
tenderness had drawn forth. He resolved to do all in his power to
heal the old wounds of the wonderful being whose trust had set him
free from his own prison of loneliness, and then reflected that
Legolas too could 'let him be': he had asked no question concerning
his true dwarvish name and, he thought, never would.