Author: Nfinity Nite
     Author’s email: darkelf_crystal@yahoo.com
     Title: Shire Chronicles: Food For Thought
     Pairing: Merry/Pippin
     Summary: A sandwich theft brings a certain Took’s feelings into the light 
when Merry tries to cheer him up. 
     Rating: NC-17
     Warning: Incest (is first cousins really incest, or is that just in Southern 
Kentucky that it’s not?) and just the teensiest bit of fluff (just enough to make your 
sweet tooth tingle), and excessive amounts of foolish Tookishness. 
     Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own those magnificent and delectable creatures 
known as Hobbits. *Sniff*. The late great J.R.R. Tolkien and his progeny do. But I 
DO own the sandwich. 
     Archive: If you want to, go ahead. But tell me first, please?
     Feedback: FEED THE HUNGRY CHIPMUNKS!!!!! Please. :) Thank-you.
     Author’s note: This story was inspired by a sandwich that I made that got 
stolen from me a few weeks ago in *almost* the same way as Pippin’s (you’ll see). 
That’s how it started, but, as we all know, some things don’t end the way they start. 
This baby grew to be a monster. And I’m so proud. I think, also that Pippin’s 
ending is WAY better than mine. By the way, Pippin is 25 and Merry is 33 (not that 
it matters).  P.S: Do hobbits have mayonnaise? Or PB&J?
     Acknowledgements: To my mom who stole my sandwich while you made me 
do slave labour in the hot sun. Thanks Mom, couldn’t have done it w/out you.
     Shire Chronicles: Food For Thought
     May-June, 2004
     
     “Finished!” Pippin Took exclaimed with a flourish as he carefully placed the 
slice of bread on top of the monstrous pile of turkey, ham, chicken, cheese (three 
different kinds), lettuce, tomatoes, bacon, olives, freshly picked cucumbers, a thick 
layer of mushrooms, pickles and onions, topped with a specially made dressing and 
mayonnaise. It was a veritable lord of a sandwich, a sandwich king, and Pippin was 
looking forward to eating it. “It’s perfect,” he said to himself out loud. “It’s perfect 
and it’s mine. My perfect sandwich.” He put all the things he’d used back where 
they belonged and was just about to take a bite when, “Pippin, darling, would you 
help me in the vegetable garden?” Pippin cast a long, mournful look at his Lord of a 
sandwich and set it down. “I’ll be back,” he promised as he went to help his mother.
     
     Half an hour later he was weeding the vegetable garden, bare backed in the 
scorching sun. He was almost finished and his stomach grumbled sullenly. He stood 
up and wiped the sweat from his forehead when he heard someone snickering 
behind him. He turned and glared at his cousin Merry.
     “You could help,” he snapped, his empty stomach making him grumpy. Merry 
took in Pippin’s bare, sweaty chest and his sudden tan and smiled cheekily.
     “I think I’ll just watch,” he said. Something in Merry’s voice made Pippin feel 
slightly bashful and he looked down from Merry’s blue stare. Eglantine came out 
then and smiled at her son.
     “Thank you Pippin, dear,” she said and handed him a glass of lemonade. He 
drank deeply and picked up his discarded shirt. He smiled at his mother, glared at 
Merry and walked back into the hobbit hole. He headed straight for the kitchen and 
the great monster of a sandwich he’d left behind. But the kitchen counter was 
empty. Pippin looked around thinking he might have put it somewhere for 
safekeeping. The kitchen was devoid of the sandwich. 
     “NO!” Merry ran into the kitchen to find Pippin standing in the middle of the 
empty kitchen. “Pippin,” he said cautiously. “Pippin, what’s the matter?” Pippin 
turned to Merry, tears welling up in his green eyes. 
     “Someone ate my sandwich!” Merry put a hand to his mouth to stifle laughter. 
“I know,” Pippin said indignantly, misreading Merry’s action as horror. “Who 
would do such a thing?” Merry forced himself to swallow sideways, which 
prevented him from laughing at the Took’s tweenish behaviour. 
     “Pippin,” he said soothingly, “You can make another one.” Pippin began to 
pout and Merry sighed. “How about this, Pip, I’ll make you a new sandwich and 
we’ll go for a picnic in the woods? Is that good enough?” Pippin nodded slightly, a 
frown still on his face.
     “But my sandwich was *perfect*,” he said petulantly, the pout curving his lips 
again. Merry thought he looked adorable. He smiled at Pippin and said, “so I’ll 
make you a sandwich even better than the one you made. What did yours have on 
it?” Pippin told Merry the ingredients and Merry set to work making two large, 
extraordinary sandwiches, stuffed full with all kinds of delicious things. These 
sandwiches made Pippin’s sandwich look like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. 
They had turkey, thick slabs of ham, chicken, roasted beef, four kinds of cheese, 
lettuce, tomatoes, olives, onions, a whole layer of mushrooms, pickles, cucumbers, 
zucchini, two layers of bacon and sausage bits, mayonnaise, and that super-special 
sauce reserved for the best sandwiches, and three slices of fresh-baked bread to 
make them two layers. 
     Pippin’s eyes were huge as he surveyed those perfect creations. If his 
sandwich had been a *lord* of a sandwich, then Merry’s sandwiches were *kings*. 
No, they were *gods*, almost too perfect to eat. Almost. He smiled up at Merry and 
Merry’s heart swelled. ‘If only he’d look at me like that more often,’ he thought. He 
shook his head and wrapped the sandwiches up.
     “Can we go for a swim before lunch?” Merry smiled. “Of course Pip,” he 
said. “Maybe I’ll teach you to swim like a fish.” Pippin laughed at the old joke. 
When Pippin was ten, Merry had taught him to swim properly and Pippin had asked 
if Merry could swim like a fish. Merry had laughed and said only fish swim like 
fish. Every time they went swimming Merry would pretend to teach Pippin how to 
swim like the fish do.
     They put the sandwiches in a basket and began a leisurely walk to the river. 
Merry enjoyed the quiet beauty of nature, the sun shining through the trees and the 
birds making their presences known. He looked at Pippin, who was being unusually 
silent. Pippin was staring at the green leaves on the trees and the sunlight filtering 
through. A stray ray of light caught Pippin’s hair and the auburn curls seemed to 
burst into red-gold flames. His green eyes sparkled and, within their depths, a green 
fire also blazed silently and passionately, dampened only by the sadness that was 
also in them. For that one moment, Pippin looked old and young, foolish and wise 
in the same instant, and utterly beautiful. Merry began to realize that Pippin wasn’t 
as young as he thought. The moment passed and Pippin was himself again. He 
sighed and looked down.
     “What’s the matter Pip,” Merry asked in a light tone. Pippin sighed again and 
looked at Merry, his emerald eyes pleading for something Merry couldn’t, 
wouldn’t, understand. Pippin’s mind raced, wondering if, maybe, just maybe, Merry 
would understand.
     “I,” Pippin stopped walking and lowered his head. He couldn’t. If he told 
Merry the truth, Merry would hate him, he’d never forgive him, and Pippin would 
be alone for the rest of his life. And without Merry, the rest of Pippin’s life would 
be short, because he’d never ever been without Merry. Never. He’d die of a broken 
heart “I,” he said again, starting and stopping, his mind churning in turmoil. 
“Merry,” he said quietly. “I can’t.” Pippin’s desperate, painful admission broke 
Merry’s heart and he watched as unwanted tears slipped down Pippin’s face. He 
continued recklessly, his Took nature taking hold of him, words spilling out 
hopelessly, getting everything off of his chest, consequences be damned. 
     “Merry, I can’t keep pretending. I can’t keep thinking that I’m strange or that 
I shouldn’t feel the way I do, because I do and I can’t keep ignoring it. I can’t keep 
up this farce of pretending that I don’t feel what I feel and I don’t want to do what I 
want to and I… just… *can’t*!” Merry looked at Pippin, confusion written on his 
face as Pippin began to rant. 
     “Pippin!” He said sharply, cutting him off as he began to start again. “Pippin, 
just tell me what’s wrong.” Pippin shook his head as sobs began to wrack his body. 
Merry pulled his resisting cousin into a hug and held him as he cried, just like he’d 
done countless times before. “Shh,” he said, rubbing Pippin’s back soothingly. “It’s 
all right Pippin, you can tell me anything. I won’t get mad,” he added as Pippin 
stopped crying.
     “Promise,” he asked in a small voice. Merry handed him his handkerchief. “I 
promise,” he said. Pippin nodded and dried his eyes.
     “Now,” Merry said. “What were you ranting about?” Pippin looked down at 
the ground, gathering his thoughts.
     “I was talking about how I feel,” he mumbled, looking everywhere but at 
Merry. “I was talking about what my Da would say if he knew how I felt. And… 
and how I can’t keep pretending that I don’t feel that way because people will think 
it’s wrong.” Merry nodded encouragingly when Pippin paused. Pippin sighed 
heavily and blurted out, “I love you Merry.” Merry smiled.
     “I love you too Pip,” he said. “There’s nothing wrong with that.” Pippin shook 
his head angrily.
     “No, Merry. I,” he paused again, fear shining in his eyes as he took the 
plunge. “I’m in love with you,” he whispered, looking at the ground again. He 
heard Merry’s sharp intake of breath and screwed his eyes shut, not wanting to see 
the look of disgust in Merry’s eyes. He waited a minute in hopeful silence that 
Merry would say something, anything, even if it was yells and curses coming from 
his perfect lips. But Merry just stood there. A strangled sob escaped Pippin’s throat 
as he turned and ran away from Merry, tears streaming from his face.
     Merry recovered from his shock quickly. “Pippin!” He ran after Pippin and 
quickly caught up with him. He made a flying leap and tackled Pippin to the forest 
floor, landed on top of him. “No!” Pippin shouted, struggling to get free, but Merry 
was taller, stronger, older and heavier than Pippin.
     “Pippin,” Merry said. Pippin still struggled. “Pippin!” Something in Merry’s 
voice made Pippin stop struggling, but he kept his eyes closed. “Pippin, please, look 
at me.” Pippin kept his eyes closed, hoping that if he didn’t see Merry’s face, it 
wouldn’t hurt so much. He was just about ready to start struggling again when he 
felt a cold wetness hit his cheek, which was quickly followed by another. His first 
thought was that it was raining, then he realized: Merry was *crying*. Merry’s 
weight shifted off of him and he opened his eyes. Merry was sitting a few feet from 
him, his head buried in his hands. Pippin was scared. The only time he’d seen 
Merry cry was when Merry was fourteen and he’d fallen out of a tree at Brandy 
Hall and broken his arm. Pain surged through Pippin as he realized that Merry was 
crying because of him, because of what he’d said. He tentatively crawled over to 
Merry.
     “Merry?” Merry stopped crying when Pippin’s arms wrapped around him and 
a tight hug. “I’m so sorry, Merry. Don’t be mad at me. I can’t stand when you’re 
mad at me.” Pippin’s voice was in Merry’s ear and Merry quickly wiped his eyes 
and looked at Pippin. 
     “It’s not you, Pippin. I just,” Merry searched for the right words and couldn’t 
find them. “I… can’t.” Merry’s eyes widened as he realized that that was the same 
thing Pippin had said only a few minutes ago. “Oh, Pip.” His hand touched Pippin’s 
auburn curls hesitantly and began to stroke them softly. His blue eyes filled with 
tears and he pulled Pippin to him in a crushing hug. “Oh, Pippin,” he breathed into 
the velvety softness of his cousin’s hair. “I must be blind.” Pippin pulled away and 
looked at Merry, a confused frown on his face. Merry laughed suddenly and smiled 
radiantly at Pippin.
     “You fool of a Took!” Pippin glared at Merry. “Oh, I do love you.” 
     “You do? Really Merry?” Merry nodded and pulled Pippin close to him. His 
face was inches from Pippin’s. 
     “I’ve always loved you, Pippin. Always. I was just afraid to tell you. 
Apparently, you’re braver than I am.” Pippin’s smile was bright and the fires Merry 
had glimpsed in Pippin’s eyes were blazing, showing the love that was held within.
     “Kiss me, Merry,” he said suddenly. Merry leaned closer until they were 
almost touching. Pippin waited patiently and Merry pressed his lips to Pippin’s in a 
short and sweet kiss. Pippin knew Merry was teasing him and he took control of the 
situation, wrapping his arms around Merry and pulling him closer. Merry kissed 
Pippin again, with more passion. He licked Pippin’s lips with his tongue, asking for 
permission. Pippin groaned and opened his mouth. They both moaned as their 
tongues met and they began to kiss with increasing desperation, as if they would 
never be with one another again. 
     Merry pushed Pippin back until he was laying on his back, their arms and legs 
entwining as Merry laid full on Pippin. Pippin moaned as Merry’s hardness bumped 
his own. Merry shifted again and Pippin made a strange, whining noise in the back 
of his throat and he arched his back, thrusting his erection into Merry’s. Merry’s 
eyes opened wide and he gasped releasing Pippin’s mouth and moving to his ears. 
He found it hard to concentrate, however, when Pippin began to kiss, suck and 
nibble on Merry’s neck. Pippin’s thrusts became harder and faster as he came closer 
to his climax and Merry began to meet his thrusts. Pippin felt a strange, shivery, 
panicky feeling that he had to do something and he had to do it soon. He captured 
Merry’s mouth with his again as Pippin reached his climax and released. Merry 
looked at him in wonder. Pippin’s face contorted to a look that was almost pain as 
his climax came to a head and then cried out into Merry’s mouth as he came. Merry 
thrust a couple of times and then he released, crying Pippin’s name as he came.
     “Oh, Merry,” Pippin breathed, twining his finger in Merry’s sweaty curls. His 
eyes were bright and he practically glowed as he looked up at his best friend, his 
love, his lover. He smiled radiantly.
     “I love you, Pippin. Always,” Merry said, kissing Pippin’s nose. Pippin 
laughed and slapped him affectionately.
     “I love you too.” They lay there for a moment to catch their breath.
     “Oh, and Pip?” Merry got up and smiled at Pippin. Pippin arched an eyebrow 
at his tone. He had a suspicious feeling that Merry was going to tell him something 
he wouldn’t like.
     “Yes, Merry?” Merry smiled and backed up a few paces.
     “I’m the one who ate your sandwich,” he said, turning and running away from 
a suddenly outraged Took.
     TBC