Title: All Shall Fade Author: Clare Author's Email: jctgal02@hotmail.com Website: www.angelfire.com/rings/wildcat Pairings: Denethor/Pippin, Pippin/Faramir, slight Denethor/Faramir Rating: R Warnings: rape, self-abuse/suicide attempt Summary: Pippin looses all hope Betas: Alright, this is a long list...at first I couldn't find any betas, then I was flooded with tons...some helped with grammar, others plot...just bear with me because they are all wonderful wonderful people who contributed so much to this story! MDBfan, Niamh, Claudielf, Connie, Miss Kitty, Gracie, Nikki, Marta and of course, the lovely Rachel, who has helped me time and time again- thanks luv! A/N: This is for the December/January Archivist Challenge where the theme was to write a story based on a scene or idea from the Return of the King movie. I have never written anything other than pg, sam/frodo before, but felt compelled to ellaborate on the Pippin/Denethor/Faramir story-line. A/N 2: My apologies to fans of the book's Denethor. As some of my betas pointed out to me, this is very unlike the book!verse Denethor. The Denethor in this story is solely based on the movie!verse one, as the challenge was to base it on a movie scene. Enjoy!!! ******************************** All Shall Fade... Pippin couldn't sleep. Thoughts swam through his head, keeping his mind from the comforts of sleep. Merry was no longer with him, and Pippin was now in the Gondorian army. But that was not what worried him. Gandalf asked Faramir to tell him everything about Frodo's plan, but he would not allow Pippin to stay and listen. The worry on Gandalf's face when Faramir had said "Cirith Ungol" had left Pippin feeling uneasy. 'There never was much hope...just a fool's hope...' He had stood at the door and tried to listen to what Gandalf and Faramir were discussing. The tension was thick and the deep halls echoed their voices, but the doors concealed what had been said. Pippin pounded the wall in frustration of his own and headed back to his room where he now lay. He heard Gandalf's bedclothes rustle and shifted to see him getting out of bed and silently leaving the room. He thought to call after him, but remembered that he had been told not to meddle in the affairs of wizards. Looking at the palantir had gotten him in this mess; he figured it would be best if he just slept. Pippin over onto his other side, facing the old and worn stone wall. Sleep would not come easily. Finally he heard the door open. Thinking it was Gandalf, Pippin rolled over to greet him. He was surprised to see it was Denethor. "My Lord-" Pippin struggled to get to his feet. 'Now is the time' he thought 'We are going to battle' Denethor looked down at Pippin. Both stood emotionless, not speaking, not giving away thoughts with expressions. Pippin waited for Denethor to speak. "Blindfold him." Denethor commanded. Pippin did not move. He was puzzled. Two men rushed in from the darkness and grabbed him. Pippin looked from guard to guard. His heart began to pound, 'Do as you're told' "My Lord?" Pippin could see him looming above him, doing nothing. His stern face never betraying his true intentions. Pippin felt the blindfold come down over his eyes. He could no longer see and he began to worry. "What do you need me to do?" His voice was full of doubt. He knew he must obey Denethor, but he could not help worrying. "My Lord? What are we doing? Where's Gandalf?" Questions ran through his mind, "Are we going somewhere?" "Be quiet!" a guard yelled. Pippin felt them push him out of the door and he began to walk down a cold corridor. He could not see where he was going, and fear overtook him. His steps grew slow and cautious. He did not understand what was happening. Was this his duty? "My Lord, why must I be blindfolded? What's happening? Are we going to war? My Lord?" Pippin spoke faster as his steps became slower. Panic crept up within him. A guard grabbed his arm and wrenched his body forward, commanding, "Walk faster! Hurry up!" "Where are we going?" Pippin asked sternly. He stopped walking, but a guard grabbed his arm again and began pulling him. His feet could not catch up, and they began to drag him. Panic consumed him. "Stop it! Where are we going! Stop it! You're hurting me!" The guard's grip tightened. Pippin tried to pull his arms out of his grip. The guard just pulled him harder. He began to kick his legs. "Gandalf! Gandalf, help me!" Pippin screamed. He caught his footing and began to pull himself in the other direction. The guard yanked him forward. "He's taking too long, my lord," a voice came from behind him. "If he continues this way, we shall be seen." "Carry him," Denethor commanded. The men tried to pick up Pippin, but he kicked and screamed. He twisted and turned so they could not grip him. "He struggles, Lord Denethor." "Must I do it all myself?" Denethor replied, irritated. Pippin heard his footsteps approaching. He felt something knock him on the head. A wave of pain washed over him, and he felt himself begin to fall. He blacked out and never felt himself hit the ground. ********************************* Pippin stood in the middle of a huge hall. It was dark, and his cheeks burned from the cold wind gushing through it. He saw a light at the end and began walking towards it. He turned to his left, and there stood Frodo. Pippin stopped and tried to open his mouth, but no words came out. A great shadow came over Frodo, and Pippin tried to scream to warn him. But Frodo fell. Sam came up behind Frodo and caught him before his limp body hit the ground. Pippin tried to run over and help them, but his feet wouldn't move. The shadow hovered over the unsuspecting Sam, who held Frodo in his arms. Pippin continued forward. He turned to see if they were all right, but all that was behind him was darkness. It was thick and heavy. He could not see through it. He felt someone grab his arm. He turned quickly to see Boromir. Boromir, who had loved him and Merry so deeply. Boromir, who had saved them, stood now before him. As he looked closer he saw that it was not Boromir, but Faramir. Faramir stood with a warm smile, and for a moment, Pippin felt comforted. He felt something fly past his head and before he knew it, Faramir had a twisted look of pain on his face. An arrow had shot him right in the chest. Pippin's heart skipped as he remembered the familiar look on Boromir's face. He felt compelled to continue walking. He turned and saw Merry, in full armor, next to him. He smiled and went to embrace his friend. Merry frowned and stepped away. Pippin's heart fell as he saw a shadow come over Merry. Merry looked up and saw something begin to fall towards him. Pippin was paralyzed; he wanted to push him out of the way but neither could move. Pippin closed his eyes and flinched as he saw a great mass fall on Merry. When he opened his eyes he was at the end of a dim hall. He could see a light shining for a little ways away and ran towards it. As he got nearer the light suddenly turned blood red. Pippin was taken aback. He felt someone grab his hand. He turned around to see Denethor. Instinctively, he bowed to the steward, but Denethor grabbed his hair and threw him to the ground. ********************************* Upon regaining consciousness, he found himself laid in an unfamiliar bed. It was large and the blankets were fur. His head was throbbing in pain. He suddenly remembered what had happened. He sat straight up and began to panic. "Gandalf?" Nobody answered. He heard someone enter the room. It was Denethor. He was carrying a tray with two glasses on it. "You'll have to forgive me for earlier. You put up quite a fight," Denethor chuckled. He sat on the bed. "How is your head?" "A little sore," Pippin rubbed the bump. Denethor offered him a glass. Pippin sipped it quietly, before setting it onto the table next to them. He looked around the room, "Where are we, my lord?" "This is where Boromir used to stay. I understand you were fond of him." Pippin bit his lip. He did not now how to respond. He simply nodded. "Well this is why you pledged your fealty to me, is it not?" "I pledged my fealty to Gondor," Pippin replied. The tension was thick and neither spoke. "Are you prepared to do whatever you must for Gondor, Master Peregrin?" Denethor broke the silence. Pippin hesitated. Then Gandalf's words rang in his head: 'You're in the service of Gondor now. You will do what you are told.' "Yes I am," Pippin said softly. He did not like the idea of dying in battle. The images of Merry and Faramir from his dream flashed through his mind. He flinched as Denethor's hand cupped his face. "I award bravery such as yours, Peregrin Took," Denethor pulled Pippin's face closer to his. Pippin felt the blood in his veins run cold. Denethor leaned in. Closing his eyes he felt Denethor's lips kiss his own. He pulled back. "What are you doing?" Pippin asked, perhaps a little harsher than he should have. Denethor's face looked hurt briefly, before it grew compassionate. "I am rewarding you for that which is honorable. You have been very brave, young hobbit. You are very courageous. Courageous and beautiful, Master Peregrin." Then it occurred to Pippin what Denethor meant to do. He looked around. A room people would not think to look in. A large bed and only one door, which was most likely guarded. Pippin pulled the covers up to his shoulders. "Don't be shy, young halfling." "You think to reward honor with that which is dishonorable?" Pippin hissed. Denethor's look turned callous and bitter. He walked over to Pippin and grabbed his face, squeezing his cheeks in a hard grip, rage plain in his eyes "You dare to assume that Shire-folk know more of honor than the Steward of Gondor?!" "You know nothing of honor. You will not even bow to the true king!" Pippin spat out, immediately wishing he could suck the words back in. He felt his heart sink, his stomach churn, and he pulled the blanket up to his mouth. Denethor stomped over to a drawer and pulled out a few pieces of rope. Pippin's eyes grew wide with fear. Denethor's eyes were full of rage. Pippin had never felt so small. He shrank back as Denethor pounced on top of him. Pippin began to struggle, but Denethor was too strong. He turned Pippin over and tied his arms to the metal bed posts. Pippin kicked out at Denethor, catching him in the jaw. Blood began to trickle from Denethor's lip. He grabbed Pippin's legs and tied his feet to the posts at the bottom of the bed. Pippin tried to scream, but Denethor shoved the hobbit's face into the bed. He could not breathe. He grew light-headed as Denethor smothered him. Then the man let go. Pippin felt the air rush back into his system. Denethor got off of him. He was relieved until he climbed back onto the bed. Pippin felt a blade slicing through his shirt and pants and then greedy hands tearing them off. Then, perhaps most frightening of all, he heard the rustle of the steward disrobing. Pippin felt himself flush. He never thought that pledging his allegiance to Boromir's father meant he would be burdened with such shame as this. A cool breeze blew across his back causing his hair to stand on end. He felt Denethor's cold, harsh hands running up his leg, across his buttocks and his back. He felt kisses being planted down his spine. He shuddered at the thought of what was happening, and his breathing hitched. "Help me! Please!" he screamed as loud as he could, although, he knew in his heart no one would hear him. Denethor laughed and slapped Pippin across his backside to prove a point. Pippin arched his back in pain. He began to cry and whisper pleas to anyone who would listen. "Please...someone help...stop him..." Pippin felt hot tears running down his cheeks. "Why are you crying, my love? I have not given you cause to weep. Do you want a reason to cry?" Out of the corner of his eye Pippin saw the man's hand fumble through a bed-side drawer and pull out some kind of lubricant. Pippin's breath came in short, rough gasps. He knew what was going to happen. As he lay there he knew he would be stricken with immense pain, yet could do nothing to stop it. He closed his eyes and waited for it to come. He tried to focus on something other than his pain. He heard noises coming from outside the door. He could hear yelling, although he could not distinguish what they were saying. He heard the door swing open. "Father?" Pippin recognized the voice, "Father! What are you doing! Let him go!" The halfling turned his head as best he could to see what was happening. Faramir ran forward, in an attempt to stop Denethor. "Faramir, if you were wise you would leave and forget this," Denethor said calmly, rubbing the oils on himself. He was erect and eager to continue. Faramir's face grew disgusted, "Father...leave Pippin be. This isn't going to prove anything. It will only reinforce the fact that you have no valour," Faramir struggled to finish, "...that you are not half the man that Aragorn could be." Denethor backhanded Faramir, who fell against a cabinet. He pulled himself back up and touched the blood running from his nose in shock. His father had never struck him like this, even as a child. To have it happen for the first time over a matter such as this… That thought caused such an ache in his heart and blow to his spirit that he stood frozen, his eyes locked on the blood that still stained his fingers. He vaguely heard Denethor call for the guards but could not bring himself to move. The guards immediately marched in, but stopped short after seeing the awkward state of the bedroom. Denethor commanded them to tie up Faramir and they hesitated. Denethor glared at them with eyes of fury and they complied, leaving him stood in the corner, for fear of Denethor's wrath. They then promptly left and continued to guard the door. Denethor walked over to Faramir and stood face to face with him. Faramir saw his father's face, but did not know the stranger who wore it. "I see now that you would betray me; betray our family. *You* do not know the meaning of valour." Denethor hissed, then spat in his son's face. Faramir didn't flinch, his look remained stern. Denethor's attention quickly went back to the now- shaking Pippin, who buried his face in the bed. He felt Denethor climb on top of him. He felt him caress his backside and rub the oils inside and out. His hands were rough and cold. Pippin bit the pillow. He wanted so much to be home, in the Shire, with Merry. He felt harsh hands spread him apart. He held his breath, and Denethor entered him. His body screamed. He was paralyzed with pain. He felt as if he were on fire. Thoughts of wriggling free almost overwhelmed him but he knew that doing so would only cause more pain. He held his breath and allowed Denethor to continue. He began to succumb to the pain. Turning his head, his eyes locked on Faramir's, and he could see the compassion in the man's eyes. He saw Faramir mouth 'hold on', but the agony was too much for his small body. He bit his lip, tasting blood, then he saw and felt no more. Forcing his body's need to escape down he held his breath and 'allowed' Denethor to continue. ************************************************ "Let me go! Let me go!" Pippin wailed, as Faramir held him in his arms. "Pippin. Pippin, it's all right. You're safe now. I've got you..." Faramir wiped the sweat off of Pippin's brow. He opened his eyes to find that he was in his bright, sunny, bedroom. Denethor was nowhere in sight, only the smiling face he knew as Faramir. "What...what happened?" Pippin started to sit up. A sharp pain shot up through him. He scooted over and looked at the bed sheet. It was stained with blood from where he had been lying. "I'll clean that up," Faramir replied, getting new bedclothes out of his drawer. "You are in your own room. It is safe here." He sat down on the bed and looked Pippin in the eyes. "I am sorry for what he did. I cannot control his actions. If you wish, I will tell Gandalf, but as long as I live, I will make sure my father does not lay another finger on you." "How did you know to look in Boromir's room for me?" Pippin asked quietly. "Honestly, I wasn't looking for you. I often go to Boromir's room when I need to feel comforted. He loved me. In his eyes I was never a failure. It brings me courage when I sit in his room and remember his love. I was going to his room, and I saw two guards in front of it. I commanded them to let me go in. I didn't expect to see you there." Faramir looked out the window. "You saved me. Thank you," Pippin whispered. Faramir smiled sadly. "I did nothing. Do not thank me." "Yes, you did. You saved me." "I could not stop him from...from hurting you," Faramir sighed. Pippin was then fully struck with the realization of all that had happened. He began to cry. Faramir held Pippin in his arms as he fell apart. He was broken. He'd lost his innocence. Faramir felt the small body shaking against his. He didn't know what to say to him. He cupped Pippin's face in his hands. "Pippin...you must know...this wasn't your fault," Faramir said in a calming tone. "You have no reason to feel guilty." "I know..." Pippin whimpered. "It is just that...nobody expects me to do anything right. They only know me as a failure. I had almost proved myself, when...*this*..." Pippin bit his lip. He couldn't cry anymore. There were no tears left. He began shaking again. He flinched as he adjusted himself in the bed. It hurt to move. His legs, his bottom, his whole body hurt. He looked down at his shoulder to see a deep bite mark in his flesh. He shuddered to remember. Faramir gently touched the mark. "I know that feeling all too well, Pippin." Faramir looked at his feet. He felt himself begin to sweat. Pippin remembered how Denethor had treated Faramir. "You are honorable, whether your father recognizes it or not." "My successes are overshadowed by my brother..." Faramir replied softly. "To my father I was only good for one thing." Pippin felt his stomach drop. Faramir continued quietly, "When my brother would be out defending our people, he'd take me to his room and do as he pleased." Pippin was shocked. Never in his wildest dreams had he imagined that Denethor would do that to his own son. Faramir and Pippin spent the rest of the morning together. They talked about their childhoods, and their homes. They talked about how they felt like nobody ever had expectations for them. They talked about love and war, family and friends. Pippin had never realized how alike he and Faramir were. He had only known him a few days, but he loved him. Boromir had mentioned him a few times, but Pippin never imagined someone as wonderful as this. "Pippin, I must go now. It is almost midday, and people will grow curious." Faramir got up to leave. Pippin grabbed his arm. "Will you come back to me?" Pippin's eyes were wide. "Pippin..." Faramir sighed, sitting down next to him. On impulse Pippin leaned in and kissed the man. They both sat back in shock. Both had felt the connection, but neither had wanted to act on it. Faramir leaned in again and kissed Pippin. He felt Faramir's tongue exploring his mouth. All the pain he had in his mind now faded from existence. His memory was hazy. Faramir released his grip on Pippin and stood up. Pippin smiled, almost as if he were drunk. Faramir grinned wider than Pippin had ever seen him grin before. Faramir took Pippin's small hand in his. "I must go. My father needs someone to take back Osgiliath. I am the man to do it." Faramir smiled softly. Pippin's heart stopped. That was the face that had haunted his dream. In the dream...Denethor had hurt him... In the dream...Faramir had fallen... Pippin could not breathe. He didn't know what to say. Upon seeing the alarmed expression on his face, Faramir sat down. "What's wrong, Pippin?" Faramir brushed Pippin's hair out of his eyes. "I...I just don't want you to leave...you cannot leave me..." Pippin whispered, holding back tears. "I must go..." Faramir licked his lips. He tried to think of the right words to say. But he had none that would reassure that he might come back because they both felt, in truth, that he would not. "No..." Pippin sobbed. Faramir grabbed Pippin's hand and held it for a moment, before he got up and left the room. Pippin sat, weeping for Faramir. Weeping for Frodo...and Sam...and Merry...and Boromir. Everything was going wrong. His dream was coming true. Merry would fall. Frodo would fall. Faramir would fall, and he himself would be left in shame. He had no reason to live anymore. All that was good, all that he loved, would be gone. He had been so young and naive. So innocent. Now he was exposed. He now knew the world for the wretched place it was. He slowly walked over to Faramir's drawer. Finding a mirror he flung it to the floor and watched as it shattered. Shattered like his life now was. He slid to the ground and picked up the sharpest piece. Bracing himself he dug into his wrist. He had hit a vein. It began to throb as thick blood oozed from the cut. He felt a tear sting his eye. He grabbed the cut and gasped. The blood was gushing rapidly, and Pippin began to grow faint. He heard the door begin to open and looked up just in time to see a surprised Gandalf enter. "Pippin!" Gandalf ran over to him. "Peregrin Took, what on earth are you doing!" Gandalf grabbed the sharp glass from him. Pippin's eyes grew heavy. "Gandalf?" Pippin squinted. He blinked slowly. Gandalf caught him just before he went limp and hit the ground. Gandalf placed him in the bed. He wrapped up Pippin's wrist and spoke prayers of healing over him. Pippin's eyes opened slowly. But before Gandalf could get a word in, he grew hysterical. "He is leaving, Gandalf...he's going to Osgiliath..." Pippin sobbed. "I had a dream, Gandalf. I saw four things in my dream. Frodo was overtaken by a shadow, Merry was killed in battle, Faramir fell and..." Pippin could not bring himself to tell Gandalf of Denethor. In Gandalf's mind he was already nothing but a disappointment. "It came true, Gandalf. And Frodo...he is sure to fall...you said that there was no hope. There is no hope, Gandalf. It will all fall to pieces! I will fail! I will never be anything. They will die in honor and I will be the failure who was good for nothing! I will die in shame!" Gandalf's hand shot over Pippin's mouth. "Be still, Peregrin. There is always hope. And doing this," Gandalf motioned towards his wrist, "will not bring you honor. You are not done in this tale, young Pippin. You have yet to show your courage, and there is no doubt in my mind that you will. As for Faramir, he believes he is showing courage by doing this. He is blinded by his father's words." "But Gandalf..." Pippin settled down, "I don't want him to leave..." Gandalf then fully understood. Pippin loved Faramir. It was the same love that Pippin had felt for Boromir. Gandalf had sensed it then, and he felt it again now. Pippin wiped his nose on his sleeve and spoke sadly, "My mother used to always tell me that if I were to only do one thing in my life it should be to hold on to the ones I love. I let Frodo and Sam leave. I lost Boromir, and I might lose Merry. I don't want to lose Faramir too." "Those are the consequences of war, Pippin. Not all is as simple as we'd like it to be..." Gandalf looked into Pippin's eyes. "You lost no one Pippin. Boromir loved you so much he died for you. And though it sometimes seems unlikely, you very well may see Frodo, Sam, Merry and Faramir again. There is always hope." Comforted by Gandalf's words, Pippin lay back on the bed and closed his eyes. Gandalf gently ran his fingers over the closed eyelids. "Go back to sleep, Pippin, I will wake you when the time comes." Pippin gently dozed off into a sweet slumber. No nightmares would haunt his dreams that night. ******************************************** As much as Gandalf had comforted Pippin with his words, Pippin had frightened Gandalf with his. Pippin's dream foretold of failure and death. Frodo and Sam were out of his hands, but as for Faramir, Gandalf could still stop him. The Istari ran out to the streets of Minas Tirith to see Faramir and his men riding off to Osgiliath. Flowers were scattered across the ground, and women wept for the men they loved. Gandalf yelled after him, "Faramir! Stay! Your father's will has to turned to madness!" Faramir turned to him. "Where does my allegiance lie if not here?" he replied bitterly. Gandalf ran over to Faramir. He could see the fear in his eyes. Faramir did not want to leave. "Stay for Pippin." Gandalf pleaded. Faramir paused. He pursed his lips together to hold back tears. One small drop escaped his eyes and rolled down his cheek. His bottom lip began to quiver. He placed his hand over his mouth and closed his eyes. He regained his composure and turned to the old wizard. "Send him my love," he whispered. And with that, he rode away. ******************************************* He was gone. Faramir had left him. "Hold on to the ones you love, Peregrin Took, hold on." Faramir had gone to Osgiliath, never to return. Pippin stood in the great hall. Denethor sat at his table, feasting on his food. Pippin was utterly disgusted by the man before him. Faramir had promised to protect him from his father, but now Faramir was gone, and Pippin was alone with him. A chill was raced his spine. Denethor turned to him but Pippin could not look him in the eyes. He had to stare at the floor. "Can you sing, master hobbit?" Pippin was taken aback by the odd question. "Well...yes, I suppose...at least well enough for my own people...but we have no songs for great halls and," Pippin paused, glaring at Denethor, "evil times..." "And why should your songs be unfit for my halls?" Denethor grumbled, stuffing food in his mouth. Pippin swallowed hard. "Come, sing me a song" Pippin held back his tears. He grabbed his aching wrist and thought of Faramir. How could a man so beautiful come from such a beast? Denethor continued to shove the food messily into his mouth. Pippin took a deep breath and sang as best as he could without breaking down. "Home is behind...the world ahead there are many paths to tread... through shadow, to the edge of night until the stars are all alight mist and shadow, cloud and shade all shall fade... all shall fade..."