Legolas sat quietly in the forest away from the fellowship. He could see them with his keen elvish sight. He knew they could not see him and that is exactly what he wanted. He slowly unlaced the leather bracing on his left arm. He rolled up the sleeve of his silver undertunic. He stared at the smooth flesh. Then he unlaced the bracing on his right arm and rolled up his other sleeve. He stared at the mass of scars that ran from his elbow to his wrist. Thin lines some were white and years old. Some were red and were only days or hours old. How long had he been doing this? How many years had he been taking pleasure in the mortification of his flesh? he thought to himself. He pulled out his dagger and gazed back at his left arm. He placed the tip of the dagger at his wrist and prepared to pull up. As he started to cut he heard a noise and he cut deeper then he had intended. Much deeper. Gasping in pain he realised he had cut down to the main vein in his arm. He laid back on the forest floor as the blood poured out of his arm.

Soon it would be over. Soon the pain would stop. Soon. he thought as tears slipped down his face.

---

Aragorn sat listening to the hobbits tell jokes when a sense of dread hit him. Something was not right. He looked around the campfire to see who was missing. Gimli was polishing his axe, Boromir sat thinking, and the hobbits were telling jokes. But where was Legolas? He had been gone far to long. Aragorn thought as he stood up. He walked in the direction he had seen Legolas go. He walked swiftly through the forest calling his friends name. He saw a figure laying on the ground, blood pooling under him. A deep, vicious cut ran from his wrist to his elbow. Blood poured out of it at a alarming rate. With a strangled moan Aragorn knelt next to his friend. His knee brushed something cold and hard. He reached down and picked it up. It was an elvish dagger and it was smeared with blood. Aragorn tore a strip of cloth from his cloak and tied it tightly around Legolas left arm, slightly above his elbow. The flow of blood slowed considerably but did not stop. He tucked the dagger away before he picked up Legolas. Why would he do this? Why? Why? Why? ran through his mind as he raced back to camp.

The rest of the fellowship looked up as Aragorn came running back. Frodo gasped when he saw the vicious cut on Legolas' arm.

"What happened to Legolas?" Frodo asked worried.

Aragorn laid Legolas down next to the fire and rummaged around in his pack. Aragorn pulled out a needle, bandages, healing herbs, and some horse hair.

"Sam boil some water. Boromir as soon as I start stitching him together he will wake I will need your help to restrain him. Frodo hold his arm I need it to be straight and flat." he said as he threaded the needle with the horse hair. Kneeling next to Legolas he began to stitch the cut flesh together again. As Aragorn predicted when the needle pierced his skin Legolas' eyes flew open. Crying out Legolas tried to shake them off. Aragorn cursed under his breath. If he didn't stop he would only aggravate his injuries.

"Boromir sedate him!" Aragorn snapped as he struggled to finish suturing. Boromir struck Legolas' face hard enough to render the elf unconscious. Finishing he tied off the hairs.

"Sam is the water ready?"

Sam nodded and handed Aragorn a cup of water. Aragorn softly washed the cut to prevent infection. He swiftly wrapped bandages around the arm. He then removed the cloth from his upper arm. He watched intently to see if any blood seeped from the wound. When none did he wrapped Legolas up in a blanket and left him to sleep.

Aragorn sat next to the elf his mind racing. Why had he done this? He then noticed that the right bracing was removed as well. He rolled up the sleeve and gasped at the myriad scars and welts. He realised that Merry was talking to him.

"I'm sorry Merry can you repeat what you said?"

Merry nodded "Who did this to him?"

The rest of the fellowship nodded they were all wondering the same thing. Aragorn silently pulled the dagger out and placed it in front of everybody. They all looked at it comprehension slowly dawning on them.

An elvish dagger smeared with elvish blood. The same dagger they had all seen Legolas use in the mines.

"He.........he did this to himself?" Frodo whispered disbelief evident in his tone.

Aragorn held out Legolas right arm so they all could see the old scars. "It seems he has been doing this for awhile......only this time he went to far." Aragorn whispered "Rest everybody I will take first watch."

Legolas slowly opened his eyes as consciousness returned. His head hurt, his arm hurt, and most of all his heart hurt. He looked around and realised he was still in the forest.

I'm alive? How? he thought as he looked at his arm.

White bandages ran from his elbow to his wrist. Someone had found him and brought him back. He knew Aragorn had healed him, probably even sutured the wound closed. Yes he did stitch the wound closed. He remembered waking up and feeling pain then Boromir and 'sedated' him. Shame swept over him he had failed again. Tears ran down his face when would he stop failing? he wondered. His father was right he was nothing but a useless failure.

His mind wandered over the many times his father had told him that.


1564 years ago in Mirkwood

Legolas shot an arrow and hit his intended target he stood a minute pleased.

"LEGOLAS!" his father bellowed behind him.

Legolas turned wondering what he had done wrong. His father marched up and tore the bow from his hand.

"You failed! You missed the bulls eye. If that was an orc you would be dead! Why must my heir be such a failure?" Thranduil yelled at him as he handed him back his bow.


1000 years ago in Lorien

Legolas stood in front of Lord Celeborn and Lady Galadriel apprehensively. He had been sent here along with 50 elves to support the golden wood from the increasing orc attacks. He had been put in charge of the border patrol. He had beaten back the most sever attack and driven the orcs away. Lady Galadriel smiled at him she looked into his eyes as she spoke.

"I thank you Prince Legolas you have saved our realm from the vicious......." her words stopped when Thranduil strode into the room. He backhanded his son viciously. "You failed Legolas! I sent you here to help and you failed!!"

Lord Celeborn stepped between father and son "What is the meaning of this Thranduil? Your son drove away the orcs! We are most grateful for his efforts." he said angrily.

"Yes he did drive away the orcs but he lost a man! No true warrior lets a man die! He failed that man, his family, and me. He is nothing but a failure!"


9 months ago in Mirkwood

"You failed Legolas! I put you in charge of watching the creature Gollum and you failed. He escaped."

"But father he had help! Those orcs set him free they 'rescued' him!" Legolas whispered

"YOU FAILED! You will go to Rivendell and tell Lord Elrond of your failure!"

End

---

Legolas sighed he knew his father would never like him. But he had to admit he was right he was a failure. The soft rustle of fabric jolted him out of his thoughts. He saw Aragorn coming back from the forest. When he saw Legolas was awake he knelt next to him to check the dressing.

"Why?"

The soft query jerked Aragorn from his ministrations.

"Why what?" Aragorn answered confused.

"Why didn't you let me die? Why won't you just leave me alone?" Legolas asked as he felt the pain of failure overtake him again.

"You are my friend I couldn't let you die. Talk to me please tell me what is wrong?" Aragorn pleaded.

"Leave me alone. Just let me die."

"Legolas........." he started to say

Legolas turned his head away he didn't want to talk. He heard the others start to wake up. He knew they would all hound him until he talked to them. They thought he was one of them but he wasn't. They could all talk and joke with each other but he couldn't. He felt apart from them.

They will all think I am weak and pitiful. he thought angrily. I don't want or need their pity! Legolas slowly sat upright waiting until the dizziness passed. The rest of the fellowship was awake and starting their morning routine. Boromir went to gather more firewood, Merry and Pippin were playfully arguing, Gimli sat brooding, Sam and Frodo were cooking breakfast, and Aragorn sat smoking his pipe. Only he had nothing to do. He sighed as his torturous thoughts continued. Why couldn't he be happy? Why must his heart hurt so much? Why was everything his fault? He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he did not see Frodo approaching.

"Legolas? Do you want to talk?" he asked gently sitting next to him. Legolas sighed he knew this was coming so he responded in kind.

"Fine." he snapped loudly addressing the fellowship. "You all want to know what's wrong? Fine I will tell you. I care not."

The fellowship all looked at him as they sat patently waiting for him to continue.

"I do this..." he said gesturing at his scarred arm "Because I am a failure. I failed my father, my kingdom, and my race. I was in charge of Gollum but I failed. No matter what I did it was never good enough for my father. Everyone here has noble reasons for being here except me. I came hoping my father would be proud of me. Gandalf was my friend and I failed him. I fail at everything I do. I contribute nothing to the fellowship, nothing! You all joke, laugh, and cry together I cannot do these things. I have no friends none! You all say you are my friends but your not no can be my friend. I am distant, cold, unforgiving, stubborn, and hateful. I am flawed and imperfect. I fail at everything even love. I hate myself and I want to die. I do not say anything witty, do anything right, I always screw up. My father was right I am a failure I am unworthy of his love, his title, his throne. I am tainted by cancerous feelings of lust. I do not like maidens and my father says i will never inherit the throne unless I marry." he buried his head in his hands and cried. They will hate me now.

The fellowship stared and his revelations and said nothing.

The fellowship sat stunned by Legolas' words, by his thoughts.

How could such a perfect being think he was a failure? Frodo wondered. He idolized the elf, he thought that Legolas was the best one in the fellowship.

Aragorn sat silently thinking about his friends words. He had always known that Thranduil was a hard man. But how could he say those things about his own son? Legolas was an excellent fighter, good friend, loyal and true. But years of put downs, name calling, and much worse had tainted his self worth. He believed what his father told him, what others said did not matter. No one knew what to say to Legolas, let alone what to do. He had bared his soul and they did not know how to lessen his pain. He sat across form them crying and wishing he was dead.

What can we do to help him? Frodo thought sadly. He suspected that whatever they did Legolas would fight them. He thought that he had no friends, that he was cold, and arrogant.

"Legolas you are my friend and I don't think that you are distant, cold, unforgiving, stubborn, and hateful. I definitely do not consider you a failure. I think your father is a pompous pig headed asshole for saying those things to his own son! And I'll let you in on a secret........everyone is flawed.........even kings and princes." Aragorn said suddenly and quietly.

The rest of the fellowship nodded, agreeing with him. Legolas looked up at them, hope glimmered in his eyes. "You all are really my friends?" he asked hopefully.

Frodo got up and walked over to Legolas, kneeling next to him he gave him a hug. "Yes we are really your friends."

Legolas smiled for the first time in 60 years and felt that everything would be alright. As Frodo sat back down Aragorn handed Legolas a cup of hot tea.

"Drink this Legolas and then rest you still have a long way to go before you are completely healed." In body and spirit. he longed to say. "We will stay here for today. I suggest everyone rest today."


Later that night

Aragorn sat watching the fellowship sleep, he had taken the first watch. Mostly because he was worried about Legolas. Aragorn knew that Thranduil had not been an attentive father but he had no idea he was an abusive father. He had mentally abused his son for close to three thousand years! If Aragorn ever saw or heard Thranduil putting Legolas down he would kill him, kill him very slowly. Aragorn heard a rustle and he glanced around looking to see if anything was amiss. He saw Legolas get up and walk toward the forest. Fear had Aragorn following him. Fear of what Legolas would do to himself, and fear of what he wouldn't do. He saw Legolas sit under a tree near where Aragorn had found him. He saw Legolas pull out his dagger (where he got it Aragorn didn't know) and place it on his right arm. Aragorn knelt next to Legolas and he put his hand over Legolas'. Legolas looked at him, despair in his eyes.

"I am not trying to kill my self........I just need to get rid of the pain." he said sadly.

"I can think of better ways to get rid of the pain....." Aragorn replied as he took the dagger from Legolas.

"How?"

"Like this........." Aragorn said as he framed Legolas' face with his hands, he then leaned forward and kissed Legolas' lips softly.

Legolas's arms twined around Aragorn's neck, pulling him closer. Seeking the warmth, comfort, and security that Aragorn offered. For the first time in many, many years he truly felt loved. Aragorn broke off the kiss and stared deeply into Legolas's eyes.

"Do not ever try to hurt yorself again. Please let me help you mellon." Aragorn said as his thumb idly brushed Legolas's cheek.

"I am afraid that no one can help me. It's like a darkness is eating at my heart, I can hear my father over and over." Legolas cried out.

Aragorn pulled Legolas into a tight embrace, he could feel the elf's tears on his shoulder. For the thousandth time that night he cursed Thranduil, for his treatment of his only son. Aragorn ran his hand up and down Legolas's back trying desperately to soothe him. After many minutes the elf's sobs subsided, and Aragorn pulled them both to their feet.

"Come, you need to rest some more." Aragorn said guiding Legolas's back to their campsite.

The next morning the fellowship started out once again, they would reach the golden wood in a few hours. Legolas had been angered when he discovered that his twin swords and dagger had been taken from him. Boromir carried the swords while Aragorn had the dagger in his pack.

They treat me like a child. he thought sullenly to himself, he knew they ment well but it still upset him. When they entered the golden wood he felt most of his troubles disappear. Suddenly he heard a slight noise, barely distinguishable even with his elven hearing. He pulled out his bow and notched an arrow to it, just as elvish archers surrounded them. His eyes darted to the left then to the right, looking for a target.

"The dwarf breathes so loud we could have shot him in the dark." Haldir said.

Legolas's eyes widened as he recognized Haldir's voice.

"Haldir of Lorien we need your protection." Aragorn said in elvish.

"Aragorn these woods are perilous we should leave." Gimli blustered angrily.

Haldir looked around at the fellowship, his eyes widened slightly at the sight of Legolas.

"You cannot leave, Come she is waiting." With that Haldir turned and started walking towards Lorien.

"Are you all right my friend?" Haldir asked gently.

"As if you care, my friend." Legolas said scarcasticaly.

They fell silent as they continued on to Lorien, although Haldir never left Legolas's side. Around midday their guides called a halt to let them rest. The hobbits sat own gratefully, for their feet hurt dreadfully. As the fellowship rested Legolas fet restless. Sighing he stood and left the fellowship to wander about in the woods. He half expected Aragorn to follow him, but he obviously knew that he needed time to himself. As he wandered he thought about all the fun times he and Haldir used to have. Haldir used to vist Mirkwood at least once a season, those times were the only times Legolas had been really happy in his youth. Then about 100 years ago Haldir stopped coming, stopped writing, and he had never heard from him again. Untill now.

"You should not wander by yourself, there are orcs about. Even here in the golden wood."

Legolas started he had been so wrapped up in his thoughts that he did not hear Haldir approach.

"Leave me be." Legolas growled.

"I wish to explain why I never sent word to you." Haldir's voice was soft and pleading.

Legolas turned to face his friend. "You had the chance 100 years ago! But no, you decided to sever our freindship without my consent. So what can you say now to make it better?" he snapped.

"I was told by your father to never come back."

Legolas's eyes widened in shock, had he heard right?. Haldir nodded sadly confirming his worst fears.

"He said I was a bad influence on you. That I was to leave and never contact you again. If I did he said he would tell Lady Galadriel that I had taken improper liberties with you." Haldir finished

"But we never.............." Legolas could not finish the thought.

"I wanted to contact you so badly mellon, you must believe me! I came every season to make sure you were stil alive. I knew of the terrible thngs your father said to you, I knew that you were sinking into dispair. I wanted to help you." Tears rolled down Haldir's face as he spoke. Legolas said nothing, instead he removed his bracers and showed Haldir his scarred right arm. A strangled cry escaped Haldir's throat as he softly kissed the scarred flesh.

"Oh Legolas why do this to yourself? If only you told me I never would have left. I would have told your father that he could go to hell."

Again Legolas said nothing he simply showed Haldir his left arm. "I tried to kill myself three days ago. Aragorn saved me."

"I am glad he did." Haldir said as he embraced Legolas.

The fellowship slowly walked up the winding staircase on their way to meet the Lord and Lady of Lorien. Legolas felt apprehensive he knew what powers the Lady possesed, she could see through your soul. See things even you did not know about yourself, see things you did not want her to see. He was terrified that she would think him weak, or worse that she would pity him. It never occured to him that she would be outraged at his father. The fellowship stood in front as the Lord and Lady descended to meet them. Celeborn looked at the members and noticed that Gandalf was missing, before he could inquire Galadriel noted that he had fallen into shadow. She looked at each member of the fellowship, offering words of comfort that only they could hear. When she loooked upon Legolas her eyes widened as she divined the truth behind his sorrow.

Oh my dear child what have you done to yourself? Her thought speach entered his mind. If only I could take away your pain.

His thoughts ran amok through his mind, all the years of torment, lonliness, and dispair were trasmitted to her in a heartbeat. Did she know about his father? Haldir?

No. I did not know about your father, had I know I would have called council and demanded that you be fostered to someone who cared. I knew that Haldir had been asked never to come back but I did not know the reason.

His soul seemed to crumble under her kind words, she truly understood.

Two people can help you Legolas, Two who care a great deal about you. One can give you hope, the other can give you strength.

Hope and strength. Aragorn and Haldir. He could feel a tiredness overwhelm him, he could barley make out Galadriel's spoken words.

"Do not let your heart be troubled, go now and rest."

Legolas vaguly saw Rumil and Orophin guiding the rest of the fellowship out to their resting places. He felt a hand on his shoulder, and a voice asking him if he was ok. He shook his head because coherent speech was beyond him, he sensed another person coming toward him. He realized that it was Haldir and Aragorn. His strength and hope. He felt them support him, guide him as the tiredness grew stronger. He felt his weapons being removed, followed by his cloak, then he was laid upon a bed. Before sleep claimed him he felt someone lay on either side of him, knowing he was safe he drifted off.

---

Aragorn and Haldir had a time getting Legolas into bed, he was so exhausted that he could barely stand. They removed his weapons, cloak, and boots. When he was resting comfortably Aragorn removed his own weapons and boots, then he laid next to Legolas as Haldir laid ont eh other side of him. Aragorn felt tired as well but he fought against it wanting to stay awake to protect Legolas fromthe bad dreams he knew he would have. Smooth elvish words broke into his thoughts, it took Aragorn awhile to realize that Haldir was speaking to him. Aragorn asked Haldir to repeat what he said.

"I said that you should rest as well, Estel. The journey has been rough on both of you. You require sleep. Besides you are as weary as Legolas." Haldir said

Aragorn felt himself drifting off "Dreams............He will............Scared." Aragorn mumbled.

"I will be here to protect you both, sleep Estel." Haldir said as Aragorn slid into sleep. "I will watch over both of my loves."

Haldir had never told either of them that he loved them, how could he? He didn't understand how his heart could love two people. The seven of them had grown up together, first it had been just him, Rumil, Orophin, Elladan, Elrohir, and Legolas. They had travelled between the three kingdoms twice a season, the rest of they year they spent with their own families. Then 100 years after their majority Elrond had found Estel and began rasing him. The six of them became like brothers and helped Elrond teach the young human. Around Aragorn's 18 th birthday Haldir came to Imladris, crying. Thranduil had forbidden him and anyone else from seeing his son. Elladan, Elrohir, Rumil, and Orophin were waiting for him and legolas to arrive for Estel's supprise party. They were angered when Haldir told them of Thranduil's decree. It was then that Haldir realized that he loved Legolas. He stayed at Imladris from spring untill winter, during that time he began to fall in love with Aragorn.

Haldir sighed and slipped off into the elvish realm of dreams.

Legolas opened his eyes and saw he was in an unfamiliar room. He felt safe and content. Stretching his hand brushed against someone. Turning he saw Haldir laying at his left and Aragorn to his right. His strength and hope had not left him. Smiling he gazed at Aragorn, the man looked peaceful. Almost child like. He reached out and brushed aside a lock of Aragorns hair. It felt silky against his hand. He looked over at Haldir and sighed. Haldir's blonde hair was spread over his pillow, his clear blue eyes were vacant. He looked so handsome, they both did. Legolas leaned over and kissed Haldir on his lips. Haldir smiled when Legolas ended the kiss.

"Good morning to you to Legolas" Haldir said.

"I forgotten how handsome you are in the morning."

Haldir simply smiled.

"Haldir is it possible to love more than one person?" Legolas asked softly

"Yes. I like to think so. Whom do you love?" Haldir said sitting up.

"Aragorn and you." Legolas whispered sitting and staring at his hands. Haldir gently raised Legolas's chin so he could look at him in the eyes.

"Really? For I love Aragorn and you."

The relief in Legolas's eyes was apparent.

"What about Aragorn, Men frown on his sort of thing." Legolas whispered.

"Not all men." Aragorn said.

Haldir and Legolas looked over at him startled. They realized he had heard everything. They saw the love in his eyes. The three of them smiled. Suddenly a knock sounded at the door. Haldir got up and opened it, a young elf maiden stood there.

"Pardon milord but Lady Galadriel thought that Prince Legolas and Aragorn might wish to bathe."

Haldir nodded smilling, Legolas and Aragron bathing. Aragorn and Legolas naked.

"Please come in my dear." Haldir said smirking.

The young elf maiden quickly walked toward the bathing chamber attached to the room. Aragorn and Legolas looked at Haldir confused.

"Lady Galadriel thought you might want to bathe. Both of you." Haldir explined impishly.

Aragorn nodded and replied, "Of course, but first I need to change Legolas's bandage."

Legolas rolled his eyes good naturedly.

"Do you need to?" Legolas whined.

"Yes." Haldir and Aragorn said at the same time.

"There are two of us and only one of you." Haldir warned.

Legolas sat up and removed his tunic. Aragorn quickly unwound the old bandage, nodding when he saw that the wound was almost healed.

"In a few days the wound should be completly healed." he said as he placed a fresh bandage on the wound.

"Remember you cannot get it wet."

Legolas rolled his eyes "I am not a child Aragorn."

The door opened suddenly, and Haldir re entered. They had not even seen him leave!

"The bath is ready." was all he said.

Aragorn, Legolas, and Haldir walked into the adjoining bathing room. A medium sized pool was sunk into the ground, around it's edge was everything they'd need for bathing. Legolas looked around the room then back at Haldir.

"Who's going to be our bathing attendant?" he asked with a smile on his face.

"Me." was all Haldir said.

Grinning widely Aragorn and Legolas removed their clothes and got into the pool. Legolas was careful to keep his injured arm above the water. He relaxed as the hot water soothed his tired muscles. He vaugly heard Haldir puttering around the pool. He jumped when he felt Haldir washing his back.

"Relax, I'm not gonna hurt you." Haldir teased.

Legolas responded with an inarticulate sound of pleasure. Haldir looked at Aragorn above Legolas's head. They would show Legolas that people did care for him, that people could love him. Aragorn sat directly in front of Legolas, thus trapping him quite effectively. Haldir slowly washed Legolas's back while Aragorn ran his fingers over his chest. Legolas's eyes slowly slid shut, his body trembling from the sensations. Aragorn leaned in and captured Legolas's mouth as Haldir nipped and licked at his ears. Legolas sighed as Aragorn slid his tongue into his mouth. By this time Legolas was rock hard, he squirmed when he felt Aragorn's hand grip him. Moaning Legolas let his head fall back against the pool rim. Aragorn released Legolas's lips and he began to stroke him in earnest. Haldir quickly claimed Legolas's mouth while his fingers continued to stroke his ears. Under this double assult Legolas knew he would not last long. Arching his back he came hard into Aragorns mouth.

Legolas stood just outside Haldir's talan watching the hobbits below him. After the bath Aragorn, Haldir, and Legolas had spent the rest of the morning in bed. But then Lady Galadriel had to speak with them so here he stood watching, and waiting. Legolas sighed and decided to take a walk around Lorien to clear his mind. Near the front entrance he noticed a commotion, a rather large band of elves was being escorted in by Haldir's brother Rumil. The five strange elves wore brown and green raiment, but the elf in the middle caught his attention. He wore a raiment of green and silver, his hair was long and slivery blond, and he wore a silver brooch. Thranduil.

My father is here in Lorien? Legolas thought frantically as he raced back to Haldir's talan.

He had to change! If his father saw him like this, in his travel clothes he'd never hear the end of it! He was grateful that Galadriel had given several outfits for him to wear while he was here. Inside the talan he tore off his old clothes and put on black leggings, a silver tunic, and black boots. He was in the process of brushing and rebraiding his hair when Haldir and Aragorn entered. They didn't have to say a word, he knew they were here to take him to see his father. Legolas turned to look at them, his fear was evident in his eyes. Haldir stepped forward and hugged him, while Aragorn finished braiding his hair.

"He will never hurt you again. We will not stand for it." Aragorn swore to him.

Legolas nodded and stepped back, it was time. Haldir led them to the study where Thranduil, Lady Galadriel, and Lord Celeborn were. Haldir bowed to his lord and lady then he turned to leave, as did Aragorn.

"Haldir my son I wish for you and Aragorn to remain." Celeborn stated his look daring Thranduil to disagree.

Thranduil wisely said nothing.

"Legolas I know you have suffered recently and I am reluctant to add to your pain. If you wish to go you may." Galadriel offered him.

"Nay, milady I.....I will stay." he whispered staring at the ground. "How did you know I was here?" he asked his father.

"Lord Elrond sent me a message stating you went off on some foolish quest. I knew you'd have to stop here for rest." Thranduil sneered. "You are to come home with me at once! You neglect Mirkwood and shirk your duties once again."

"What about my duties and obligations to the fellowship?" Legolas asked as he finally looked up at his father.

"Lord Elrond said you could return if you wish to."

"I do not wish to."

"What? What did you say to me?" Thranduil took a menacing step toward Legolas.

Legolas's heart thundered inside his chest, he cringed waiting for the blow that would surely follow.

Thranduil raised his hand to strike his son but was shocked when the human grabbed his arm.

"If you so much as touch him, your highness, it will be the last thing you ever do."

Aragorn said rage coloring his every word.

Thranduil wrenched his arm back "And just who are you human?"

"I am Aragorn, leader of the fellowship your son is under my command and my protection." Aragorn stepped back to stand next to Legolas.

"Thranduil! Sit down there and shut up!" Celeborn snapped as he stood up. "We did not ask you here so you could berate and hit your son! He has suffered quite enough and most of it is your fault!"

Thranduil paled as he sat "How do you know what I have done to my son? What lies has he told you now?"

"He has told no lies for the heart doesn't lie. I have seen his thoughts, his pain, his very soul." Galadriel stood next to her husband. "I have seen the millennia of torment, name calling, and abuse you have heaped on your son. Tell my why Haldir, Rumil, Orophin, Elladan, Elrohir, and Estel were suddenly kept away from him. Why did you forbid them?"

"Because they were bad influences upon my son." Thranduil said looking not at Galadriel but at the floor.

"So say you. Did it ever occur to you that the only times he was truly happy was when he was with his friends?" Galadriel paused when she saw the look that flashed across Thranduil's face. "Ahhh now I see, it did occur to you.....You were and are jealous of anyone who gets close to your son."

Thranduil looked up at Galadriel "Yes it does bother me. My son would rather spend time with his friends and not his family. He is the only family I have left. Can you blame me for wanting him to stay home? Believe it or not I do love my son very much. Jealousy can make a person lash out in unexpected ways."

Legolas was dumbstruck by his father's revelation. He loves me? He was just jealous and it made him lash out?

"It matters not the reason why you did it you still did!" Legolas yelled at his father.

"Did you.....Do you know that I wanted to die? I tried to kill myself many many times because of you! I would not be here if it wasn't for Aragorn!" Legolas rolled his sleeve up and removed the bandage on his left arm, he showed his father the long vicious cut. "He saved me because he loves me! ME! The one you said no one could love! I am tired of listening to your lies! I hate you! I hate you for everything!" Legolas then rolled up his other sleeve and showed his father his scars. "I have been doing this to deal with the pain you caused."

Thranduil's eyes widened at his sons outburst, he looked down again but not before Legolas saw that his father was crying.

Legolas was shocked My father is crying? I made him cry? suddenly he couldn't stay here anymore. He turned and ran out of the room, ignoring the cried telling him to stop. He ran down the stairs and out into the woods, tears pouring down his face. He stopped when he reached the river, he saw someone was bathing there. It was Rumil, his clothes and weapons lay on the bank next to his feet. Without a thought he grabbed Rumil's dagger and ran off into the woods to be alone.

Why can't I stop hurting people? Why? Legolas fell to his knees as he cried. There was only one way to solve this, only one. He took the pilfered dagger and placed on his right arm, he slowly cut himself once, twice, three times. The cuts were long and shallow so they were not life threatening, so he slowly placed the dagger on his flesh for a fourth and final cut.

"Legolas Greenleaf what in the name of the Valar are you doing?"

Legolas was startled by the shout, he had not heard any one approach. He looked behind him and there was Rumil, an angry look upon his face.

---

Rumil had been swimming to cool off when he saw a movement out of the corner of his eye. He turned in time to see Legolas run off with his dagger.

What is he doing? he thought as he swam to shore, Rumil quickly dressed and followed Legolas.

His eyes widened when he saw Legolas cut him self three times, then he prepared for a fourth cut.

"Legolas Greenleaf what in the name of the Valar are you doing?" Rumil shouted angrily at him for he knew Haldir would be devastated to learn his love was hurting himself on purpose again! Legolas turned and saw him, shame coloring his face.

"Tis not your concern Rumil.......Just leave me alone!" Legolas shouted at him.

"I cannot do that Legolas, you are one of my oldest friends. Tell me what ails you." Rumil knelt in front of Legolas and took the dagger from him. Frustrated Legolas told Rumil the whole tale.

---

Celeborn, Galadriel, and Thranduil sat talking in low voices, while Aragorn and Haldir waited for Legolas to return. Suddenly Galadriel stopped talking she stood up and walked over to the window.

"Legolas has hurt himself again!" she cried out terrified for him "Oh thank the Valar........Rumil is with him." she sighed relieved.

Haldir and Aragorn raced out to find their beloved.

Aragorn and Haldir ran out of the talan and deep into the woods, fear driving them. They stopped and asked a sentry if he knew where Rumil was.

"Yes milord, he went to the river to swim." the sentry told them

Haldir thanked the sentry and they continued on their way, when they got to the river they saw impressions in the ground. They followed the footprints until they came to a heartbreaking scene. Rumil held Legolas trying to soothe him, Legolas was crying and had three long cuts on his arm. They were talking quietly, or rather Legolas was talking Rumil was simply listening. Haldir and Aragorn approached the pair quietly so they would not disturb them. Rumil looked up as he sensed his brother close by, they saw sadness, rage, and hate in his eyes. Haldir and Aragorn realized that Legolas was telling Rumil what they already knew.

"Legolas? You have company." Rumil whispered into the other elf's ear.

Legolas looked up and saw Haldir and Aragorn standing a few paces away, he lowered his eyes in shame.

"I will leave you now Legolas........You will get through this. Always remember I am your friend." Rumil gave Legolas a hug then he stood. He bowed to Aragorn and Haldir before he picked up the dagger and left.

Haldir swiftly knelt in front of Legolas, he hugged him close to him hoping to drive away the demons. Aragorn inspected the cuts on Legolas's arm, he sighed relieved they would heal soon. Aragorn moved behind Legolas until the three of them were embracing each other. They stayed that way for some time.

---

Rumil walked swiftly through the forest silently cursing Thranduil, he reached out with his mind and felt out where his parents were. He climbed up the stairs that led to his fathers study, he hoped Thranduil was inside. He was not disappointed. Thranduil, Galadriel and Celeborn looked up as the doors were thrown open. Rumil stalked inside his eyes were on Thranduil, Celeborn stood immediately recognizing the look in his son's eyes.

"You son of a bitch! You arrogant pig headed bastard." Rumil swore as he grabbed the front of Thranduil's tunic and hauled him to his feet. He then tossed the king against the wall, curses filling the air. "You are not worthy of your title, or to call yourself an elf. I should kill you right now and spare Middle Earth of your foul presence." One of his hands circled Thranduil's throat and squeezed.

"Rumil! Stop it at once!" Celeborn shouted at his youngest son.

Rumil released Thranduil, he watched the king fall in a heap on the floor. He pulled out the dagger Legolas had cut himself with. He tossed it in front of Thranduil.

"See what you drive your only son to do? That is his blood drawn by his hand! His actions are on your head because of the foul way you treat your only kin. Your only son. An orc could have raised him with more tenderness then you have shown him." Rumil spat out.

"Rumil! Thats is quite enough." Celeborn said but gently this time as he walked over to his son.

"I.....I....I am sorry Ada.......I.....I" Rumil stopped as he realized what he had done, his anger was gone replaced by shame. His slim frame began shaking as he understood what he had almost done.

Celeborn hugged his son and smoothed his hair in a comforting manner. "Shhhhhh......It's alright my son. You care deeply for Legolas, tis only normal that you defend him. Tell me is he alright?"

"Nay. He stole my knife and cut himself........He wanted to kill himself." Rumil hugged his father back grateful that Celeborn had always treated him like a son. Celeborn kissed his son on the cheek and stepped back. "Go now and rest Rumil. My son." Celebborn smiled and turned to his wife. Galadriel was kneeling next to Thranduil, inspecting his neck.

"Do you understand the depths to which you have thrown your son? Do you not see that you treat Legolas as you were once treated? I saw how Oropher yelled and belittled you. I know of how you cried yourself to sleep at night wishing, hoping, praying for his love and approval. You have only repeated a deadly cycle." Celeborn said as he knelt in front of Thranduil.

"Aye.....I finally understand only it is to late.....I wish I told him I love him and how much he means to me. I only wanted him to be strong and wise." Thranduil sighed and looked at his son's blood on the knife.

"It is never to late....You may never be father and son but you can still be friends. Twill not be easy but you will prevail." Galadriel said as she looked up. She noticed that Rumil had not left as asked. "Rumil will show you to a talan where you can stay." she looked at Rumil and noticed the horrified look on his face. "My son you must apologize for your actions and words. Go now and rest Thranduil. We will speak more tomorrow. Oh and Rumil? Make sure some food is sent from the kitchens, we do not want him to starve."

"Yes milady mother." Rumil bowed and started for the door, he waited until Thranduil followed him.

---

Rumil walked out into the cool night air, he sighed and made his way to another talan. He paused briefly to speak to a young elven house maiden. She promised that food would be sent to Thranduil before she walked away. Rumil stopped in front of a door, he turned to Thranduil "I am sorry for my words and actions your highness. Here is your room if you need anything my room is next door."

"There is no need to apologize Rumil. I am glad that someone finaly said what needed to be said. I only wish me and my son were as close as you and Celeborn." Thranduil said as he walked into his room.

"Good night milord." Rumil said stunned by Thranduil's words.

"Good night young Rumil."

---

Aragorn and Haldir stayed in the forest hugging and soothing Legolas until the prince fell asleep. Haldir picked him up and they started for his talan, Aragorn followed them troubled by what he had seen in Rumil's eyes. Once they were inside Haldir's talan Aragorn helped to remove Legolas's boots. The three of them lay down and slept.

Legolas woke the next morning slightly confused as to where he was. Then he remembered what he had done yesterday. He sighed he was sure that Haldir and Aragorn were upset, maybe even angry with him. Why couldn't he stop hurting the ones he loved? Suddenly a calm overcame him and he knew what he must do. Legolas quietly climbed out of bed and dressed, he walked into the adjoining room. He spied a tray of food on a table near the door, upon the tray were also eating implements. He picked up one of the small eating knives as he walked out the door. He walked until he reached a small clearing just paces from a small garden. He leaned up against a tree and pulled up both of his sleeves, he then unwound the bandage from his left arm. Legolas swiftly cut the stitches and healing flesh back open, then he slashed his right arm from wrist to elbow. The knife slipped out of his nerveless fingers, he closed his eyes and waited to die. Know that once he was gone his loved ones would move on.

---

A shrill scream brought Aragorn and Haldir to wakefulness, they realized that Legolas was gone. Jumping up they had almost reached the door when it burst open. A young maiden stood in front of them.

"Milord! Milord! Oh Valar help him milord! You must help him! Oh Valar!" the woman said on the verge of hysteria. "Down by the garden! Myandel went for Lady Galadriel but I fear she will be to late!"

Aragorn and Haldri ran out into the garden where they saw Legolas bleeding profusely from both arms, his pallor was a horrid shade of blue and grey. Galadriel and Celeborn were kneeling next to Legolas, they were trying to heal him.

Galadriel looked over at them, her beautiful face was full of sorrow. "Mandos calls to him. His spirit is to weak it resist it's call.....We can do nothing for him."

"No! There is a way and you know it milady." Haldir said "I will bond with him. I will bring him back to Middle Earth. It's the only way and you know it!" Haldir was desperate.

"It is the only but I do not know if it will work. His heart belongs to both of you. His soul has already chosen both of you. I do not know if he will awnser only one of you." Celeborn broke in.

"You mean we both have to bond with him?" Aragorn asked incredulous. He had never heard of such a thing!

"Yes. It can be done. It must be done if you wish to save him." Galadriel said.

Aragorn and Haldir nodded they would do this, Legolas could not die!

"Come let us away to the House of Healing." Celeborn said as he picked up Legolas and started walking. Behind him Galadriel, Aragorn, and Haldir followed.

"Has someone told Thranduil?" Haldir asked ignoring the dirty look Aragorn shot him.

"Aye. I sent Myandel he is waiting in the study for word. He knows to stay away, for is afraid of what you or Aragorn might do. After what Rumil did last night I don't blame him. You should know that he truly regrets what he has done." Galadriel stated.

Aragorn and Haldir said nothing as they made their way to the healers. Once there Celeborn laid Legolas down on a bed, he motioned for Aragorn and Haldir to lay on either side of the prince. Celeborn took a knife and held it in the fire for a second, before he cut Aragorn's palm. He placed Aragorn's hand over the gash on Legolas's right arm. He then cut Haldir's hand and laid it on Legolas's left arm. As their blood and life force flowed into the golden prince, Celeborn said a quick prayer that they would be strong enough to pull Legolas back. He hoped he had not committed the three of them to death. After many long tense minutes Legolas stirred and moaned, Galadriel sighed apparently the bonding had worked. They laid Aragorn and Haldir down next to Legolas making sure the three of them were touching.

He heard voices, familar voices, he couldn't make out the words though. He felt somone softly stroking his hair. What was wrong with him? What had happened? His whole body ached, he longed to slip back into the quiet darkness. Slowly the voices cleared up he could hear and understand the words now.

"Why dosen't he wake?"

"Haldir, he is mortal. Unlike you or Legolas his body dosen't heal as fast." Galadriel said. "It is easy to forget that."

"What do you mean?"

"After the bonding we stitched up Legolas, you, and then Aragorn. He lost a lot of blood."

"Why wasn't I told of this before?"

"We knew how you'd react."

Aragorn forced his eyes open, he moaned the light was so bright. He was laying on his side behind Legolas, so they were spooning. His head was nestled among the soft, gold locks of Legolas's hair. Aragorn heard the soft rustle of fabric as Galadriel bent over him.

"Rest Estel. You lost a lot of blood." she smiled down at him.

"Legolas...." He managed to get out.

"Is fine, Haldir is fine. You are not, you need sleep." she admonished him.

"No....I am fine" Aragorn whispered as he tried to sit up. A pair of hands came from behind him and gently pushed him back down. Aragorn looked over his shoulder and saw Haldir smirking at him.

"As you once told Legolas, there are two of us and only one of you." Haldir said as he brushed the hair out of Aragorn's face. Aragorn didn't have the strength to argue, the darkness swirled around him and finaly pulled him under.

---

Haldir watched as Aragorn fell asleep, his hands carressing the young rangers face. He sighed and looked at Galadriel,

"He is so young compared to us." he whispered mostly to himself.

"Yes he is but..." Galadriel tralied off as a knock sounded at the door. She walked over and opened it. Thranduil stood there staring at the ground.

"I just wanted to know if my son was ok." he whispered, ignoring the glare Haldir gave him.

"He will be. Aragorn and Haldir saved him by bonding with him." Galadriel said as she took Thranduil by the arm and guided him inside. Thranduil stared at his only son for a minute.

"I am pleases that he is so loved. I do love him, in my attempts to keep him close I drove him away. I drove him to this. I love him so much." tears ran down Thranduil's face as silent sobs wracked his body. "I know he can never love me back. I have done him to much harm. He will never love me." Thranduil turned to leave the room.

"Your wrong." a soft voice said.

Galadriel, Haldir, and Thranduil turned toward the bed where they saw Legolas looking at them. He was pale and very tired but love and determination radiated from him. Thranduil sighed and shook his head, he walked over to his son.

"Rest Legolas, we will talk more later. Right now you need your strength. Rest my son." Thranduil leaned forward and kissed his son ont he forhead. Legolas smiled and snuggled closer to Aragorn before falllingback to sleep. Ignoring Haldir and Galadriel, Thranduil left the room. Outside he stood crying, What kind of father was he? How could he have treated his son like this? He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he didn't hear Rumil approach.

"What ails you milord?" Rumil politely inquired

"Nothing young Rumil."Thranduil sighed he didn't know what to do anymore.

"Come milord, I know a privte place where we can talk. You look like you ned someone to talk to." Rumil insisted. Thranduil did not have the strength to argue. He let Rumil take him away.

Thranduil followed the young guardian through the forest untill the reached a secluded glade. Rumil turned and looked at the king. Why did he look so afraid? What was going through his mind?

"Your son will be ok. He will love and respect you eventually milord." Rumil spoke with quiet authority.

Thranduil rasied an eyebrow "How do you know such things young one?"

"I saw in my mothers mirror last night."

"Ahhhh I understand now. What else did you see?" Thranduil asked as he sat under a tree.

"Many things." Rumil vaguly replied as he sat next to the king. "I saw my brothers, my parents, the fellowship, and you."

"Me?" Thranduil was confused. Why would the Valar show Rumil him? "What was I doing?"

"Kissing me." Rumil whispered as he stared at the ground, a faint blush creeping across his face.

Thranduil stared at Rumil dumbfounded. Had he heard correctly? "I was......kissing you?" he echoed incredulous.

Rumil nodded not looking at Thranduil, "Yes kissing and talking. Under a tree in a glade like this."

"Is that why you sought me out?" Thranduil demanded.

"No. It did not occur to me. I saw you crying and thought you need to unburden your soul. The things in the mirror are possible futures. Nothing is certain." Rumil looked up and into the king's eyes, Thranduil could see the sincerity in them.

"I apologize for my words, you just took me off guard for a moment. Believe me that dosen't happen often." Thranduil smiled at the guardian.

Rumil smiled back at Thranduil suprised at how beautiful the elf king was. It was shocking to realize that he wanted that future to happen, he wanted Thranduil to kiss him. Oh how Rumil wanted him. That in itself was startling because just a few days ago he had wanted to kill the king! Thranduil looked over at Rumil, why was he being so quiet? What was he thinking?

"How is Legolas?" Rumil inquired.

Thranduil started he had been so wrapped up in his thoughts that he had forgotten that Rumil was there.

"He will survive. Aragorn and Haldir bonded to him, he will live and love. I pray to the Valar that he will one day forgive me." Thranduil admitted, blushing slightly.

"He will." Rumil smiled at Thranduil as they lapsed into silence, enjoying the others company.

While Rumil and Thranduil talked the Lady Galadriel stood in her talan daydreaming. She gazed out a window as she sang, her heart was glad that Legolas would be alright. Celeborn stood in the doorway smiling as he watched his wife.

"Did you tell Thranduil about Rumil's vision last night?" he asked as he walked over to his wife. He wrapped his arms around her waist in a light hug.

Galadriel smiled and leaned against her husband. "No. Rumil is honest he will tell him." she laughed slightly. "First Haldir and now Rumil. Soon Orophin will find a love then we shall be alone."

Celeborn kissed the top of her head, he could hear the sadness in her voice. "I know melamin. We see them as children even though they are well over three thousand years old. Do not dispair for they will love you always. They are your sons."

She nodded sighing as she spoke. "I know but love can be tricky. I haven't even figured it all out yet!" she teased her husband.

Celeborn laughed and turned Galadriel around so he could kiss her mouth. He ran his fingers through her lovely golden hair.

"Come melamin show me what you do know of love." Celeborn whispered into her ear before he nipped the tip of it.

Galadriel shivered and grasped her husbands hand. "If you insist milord." she laughed as she led him to their bed.

---

Haldir watched Legolas and Aragorn sleep, they both looked so peaceful. Sighing he got up and walked to the window. He looked out upon the splendor of Lorien but it held no peace for him. He could still see Legolas laying on the ground his lovely face pale, crimson blood staining the ground. Haldir felt the tears run down his face, he was shocked he hadn't cried since his parents died. Rumil and Orophin had been to young to remember them but he did. He remembered the day Galadriel and Celeborn had come to bring them to their home. Haldir shook his head trying to shake the images in his head. But they continued to torment him, sobbing he laid his head upon the windowsill. He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he did not hear someone approach him. Before he knew it he was being turned into a loving embrace, his head rested upon a soild chest. Haldir clutched at the person not caring who it was, he just needed someone to hold him.

"What is wrong melamin?" Aragorn asked Haldir while he gently rubbed his back.

Haldir smiled slightly he should have know it was Aragorn. "I was thinking about my parents, my biological parents I mean. I was thinking about Legolas also. I can't seem to stop thinking."

"Come back to bed then, you need your rest also. Besides Legolas needs both of us close by."

Haldir nodded and followed Aragorn back to their bed he lay down behind Legolas. Aragorn lay in front of him, together they held him in a warm loving embrace.

---

Thranduil wondered what he should do, the young one had fallen asleep. They had talked for hours about anything and everything. When Rumil had yawned Thranduil had smiled pulled him closer. Rumil had smiled and snuggled up against the elder elf and fell asleep. It could not be comfortable sleeping on the ground that much he knew. Without a second thought he picked up Rumil and carried him back to his talan. Thranduil laid him upon the bed and pulled the covers over him. He then pulled a chair up next to the bed and sat, watching as the young one slept.

Pain.

That was all he knew was pain, physical and emotional pain. He took it and he dished it out. But that was all he knew was pain.

No.

His mind rebelled against that thought.

You know love. his mind said.

No. I hurt them. Haldir and Aragorn will be better off without you.

NO! They love you. Your father loves you. his mind reminded him stubbornly.

I hurt my father.

No more then he hurt you. You can start over now. Start a new relationship.

Legolas moaned as pain raced through his body and heart. He tried to open his eyes, tried to wake up.

"Relax melamin. Rest." a ghostly voice floated into his mind. "You are very weak. Mandos still has a grip on your mind."

Legolas was confused the voice sounded like Haldir, he could sense Haldir close by. Soft hands brushed against his forehead, cheeks, and lips.

"Rest we are here for you. Please my love rest then come back to us." a new voice said.

Legolas was stunned was this new voice Aragorn? They were still here with him?

"We love you." the voices were growing faint and faraway.

They loved him? But how? All he knew was pain.

No. he reminded himself I told you so. Now rest they are waiting for you.

Legolas obeyed his body and sank down into the darkness.

---

Haldir and Aragorn watched as Legolas's face smoothed out and was peaceful again. They sighed and lay down next to him. Sleep claiming them almost immediatly.

---

Galadriel sighed and cuddled against her husband, sated and content.

"Hmmm. We haven't done it 3 times in one night in years." Celeborn sighed unable to move.

Galadriel laughed "3, 678 years to be exact."

Celeborn laughed and curled up against his wife. "I wonder how Thranduil and Rumil are faring."

"Fine. They will be fine, they will do well by each other. They can help each other." Galadriel sighed and began to lick, kiss, and nibble a path to Celeborns ear. "Are you sure three times are your limit?"

Celeborn groaned and kissed his wife hard on the mouth, passion and desire taking over him. He cupped her full breast while he toyed with her nipple.

"Are you sure three times are your limit?" He teased her.

Galadriel responded by straddling her husband and smiling down at him. "Why don't we just see?"

Celeborn laughed and let his wife set the pace.

---

When Rumil awoke he saw Thranduil sitting next to his bed, asleep in a chair. Gods he was so handsome, just looking at him was pure pleasure. Rumil reached over and softly stroked down Thranduils face and neck stopping over his pulse. It was racing. Startled Rumil looked up at Thranduil he was shocked to see he was awake.

"I.....I...Sorry." Rumil stammered as he withdrew his hand.

Thranduil smiled and lay down next to Rumil, he leaned over and kissed the young elf.

"Whatever for?" Thranduil asked when he release Rumil's lips.

"For touching you. You are a king. You are far above my station." Rumil gazed into deep blue eyes.

"What if I said I wanted you to touch me? As much as you like? What if I said that I wanted to touch you?" Thranduil countered as he rubbed Rumil's nipples through his tunic.

"Then I would say who am i to refuse such a pretty request." Rumil smiled and kissed Thranduil, pulling him closer.

Thranduil smiled and sank into the deep, endless kiss......

Celeborn idly ran his fingers through his wife's hair, he enjoyed the feel of it. She sighed in her sleep and cuddled close to him.

"Whats wrong melamin?" she mumbled sleepily.

"I don't know what I would do if I lost you." he sighed and pulled her close.

"You would move on because I would not wish you to pine to death." Galadriel looked into his eyes.

"I don't know if I could, my love." Celeborn responded honestly.

Galadriel sat up and looked deep into his eyes. "There is another. You know of whom I speak, love."

Celeborn's eyes widened at her words. "You know of him? I swear that was ages ago!"

Galadriel placed her hand over his lips and smiled. "I know. But true love never dies, never fades, and never goes away. He loves you also." she smiled at the shocked and angry look in her husbands eyes. "And yes he loved our daughter. Celebrian and I know how to share, know that an elven heart is big enough for multiple loves."

Celeborn was struck dumb, speechless for the first time in a milinneum. Galadriel smiled and lay down next to him sighing.

"Sleep love for we have had an exhausting night." she giggled at the blush on Celeborns face.

---

Legolas woke up and for the first time in a long while there was no pain. The constant ache in his heart was gone, the gashes on his arms were healed, and so was his soul. He felt complete. He smiled as his surroundings set in, Haldir and Aragorn on either side of him holding him. He felt safe, warm, and most of all loved. He sighed maybe he could love, and be loved in return. Maybe, just maybe he could be happy now. He knew he had to move on, forgive and forget, and start over. He knew his father was truly sorry for his actions. He just hoped Thranduil could be happy as happy as he was. Legolas shifted slightly to see if he could get up without waking his lovers. But the instant he moved Haldir woke and smiled at him.

"Good morning my little Greenleaf. How do you feel?"

"Better. How are you and Estel?" Legolas asked stunned for he had never called Aragorn that.

"I am fine but Estel....." Haldir trailed off not wanting to scare Legolas.

"What? Damnit what?" Legolas snapped angry.

Haldir pulled Legolas closer to him. "He lost alot of blood buring the binding. Ada and mom forgot that he was human. They tended hihs wounds last."

Legolas closed his eyes as pain and relief flooded over him.

Haldir felt Legolas tense up. "Do not worry he will be fine. He just needs rest."

"How fares the fellowship?"

"Fine. They worry about you and Estel. Boromir is doing an admirable job at keeping them occupied. Rest a bit more Legolas, you have been through alot these last few years."

Legolas nodded and closed his eyes, sleep claiming him once more.

---

Rumil moaned and shifted restlessly under Thranduil. It was to much and yet not enough. He wanted more, he needed more. He needed , hell he didn't know what he needed. Suddenly he was scared, he had never lain with another before! Thranduil noticed the change in the elfling, he lay down next to Rumil idly stroking his hair.

"What is wrong?"

"I.....I have never....." Rumil's face burned with shame so he looked away.

Thranduil cupped his fingers under Rumil's chin forcing him to look into his eyes.

"It is nothing to be ashamed of. Do you trust me?"

Rumil nodded he wasn't sure he could even speak. Thranduil smiled and kissed Rumil deeply as his fingers swiftly unlaced the leggings that were in his way. Rumil gasped when he felt Thranduil's hand close around his erect member. Rumil arched his back as Thranduil stroked him, long, sure strokes. Rumil tore his mouth from Thranduils, then he kissed the kings ear. Thranduil gasped and sped up his strokes. Rumil smiled as he nibbled and sucked the ear in his mouth. Rumil gasped he could feel something building up inside of him, strong and powerful. He screamed Thranduil's name as he came. Thranduil held him as the trembing subsided, he forgot that the first time was rather intense. Rumil looked into Thranduils eyes in wonder "Do you want me to?"

Thranduil smiled "As lovely as that sounds I think you need your rest."

Rumil tried not to yawn, he smiled and kissed the king. "Yes that sounds lovely. I.....I love you."

Thranduil started but he smiled even wider "Good for I love you also."

Rumil slid into sleep comforted by his loves nearness.

Aragorn awoke the next morning knowing the fellowship would be moving on soon. They had to move on and soon. Aragorn sighed if Legolas was not well enough then perhaps he coould stay behind. He got up and walked to the window, he could see the hobbits and Boromir talking. Aragorn realized that since his arrival in lothlroien he had basicaly ignored the other fellowship members. Shame swept through him. What kind of leader was he? He ignored those he was responsible for! Aragron jumped at the hands that gently rubbed his shoulders. Damn he hated being caught off guard!

"You will be leaving soon." Haldir stated as he rubbed Aragorn's shoulders and neck.

"Yes. If Legolas is not well he can stay behind." Aragorn sighed as he felt the tension drain out of him.

"He won't. We both know this. Galadriel said he should be well enough to travel on the morrow." Haldir pulled Aragorn into a brief hug.

Aragorn nodded and returned the embrace. "Tomorrow then. Stay with him? I must tell the others."

Haldir nodded and moved back toward the bed as Aragorn left the room.

---

They had been in lothlorien for a week and in that time Aragorn hadn't spent anytime with them. Boromir knew that Legolas required his attentions but he still felt forgotten. The hobbits had been enjoying themselfs immensly. The elves had been kind and kept the hobbits occupied. But Boromir still felt ill at ease here. A few minutes ago Haldir's brother Orophin had taken the hobbits for a walk and a picnic. He had been invited but the elves made him feel odd. The only elf he felt comfortable with was Legolas. He was so deep in his thoughts that he did not see Aragorn approach.

"What ails you son of Gondor?"

Boromir jumped and turned around glaring at the ranger. "Nothing. I as mearly thinking. Why are ou here? Does Legolas no loger require your attention? How does he fair?"

"He is fine. He recovers quickly and nicely. We will be leaving tomorrow. Where are the hobbits? I saw them with you not to long ago." Aragorn wondered why Boromir hadn't gone with them.

"Orophin took them for a picnic. Tomorrow you say? Is Legolas well enough or will he stay behind?" genuine concern laced his words.

"He is well enough." Aragorn sighed. "I must get back. Please tell the others for me? I am sorry I have been negligent to you and the others."

Boromir was taken aback by the apology. "Do not apologize. We understand that Legolas needs you now. How will Haldir take your leaving?"

"He understands. I wonder about the future though. When elves bond with mortals the elf becomes mortal and dies when the mprtal does. But there are two elves and a mortal in this bond. I wonder did I doom them both to death?" Aragorn mused aloud.

"I serously do not know. Why do you not ask the Lord or Lady?" Boromir suggested.

Aragorn nodded and gave Boromir a brief hug before he rose and left. Boromir stared at the rangers retreating back. Sighing he got up to tell the others that they would leave tomorrow.

---

When he re entered the room he saw Lady Galadriel and Lord Celeborn sitting across from the bed. Legolas was in a sitting positon propped up by pillows. Haldir sat on his right. They looked up as Aragorn entered, dread hit him. What was this about?

"Please sit Estel." Celeborn asked him.

Estel. Not a good sign, his father only called him that when he was upset at him. Aragorn sat on Legolas's left and he looked at the Lord and Lady.

"We need to talk to you about your unique bond." Galadriel started. "You all know that bonding to a mortal means that your immortality is surrendered." Galadriel looked over at Estel for a moment. He looked sad and guilty. "But it is not so in this case. When Estel dies and passes on to Mandos his love will have been enough to keep you two alive. Your immortality and his love over many many years will be enough to sustain these two." Galadriel smiled at the increduilty in their eyes.

"We know that tomorrow the fellowship will move on. Will you join us at a farewell feast tonight?" Celeborn asked them.

The three of them nodded. The Lord and Lady smiled and stood and left the room.

---

Rumil wandered through the forest trying to understand all that had happened in the past few days. Thranduil loved him and he loved Thranduil but what would Legolas think about the situation? Sighing Rumil sat under a tree as he tried to calm his mind. Tomorrow the fellowship was leaving so they had to talk to Legolas tonight.

Legolas sat brading his hair in prepration for the farwell banquet tonight. Aragorn and Haldir had left earlier to help Lady Galadriel. He was glad to be alone, he needed to rebuild their trust in him. He swore to himself that he would always think of them before he did something stupid. He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he didn't hear the door open. Thranduil watched his only son as he braided his hair. Thranduil was so ashamed at how he had treated his son in the past. He hoped he could have, at the least, a friendship with Legolas.

"Legolas?"

Legolas jumped and whirled around to face his father.

"Ada!" Legolas jumped up and gave his father a hug. "What brings you here?"

"I wanted to say I am sorry. I know words can never be enough but I am sorry. I am glad that you are ok." Thranduil smiled and hugged his son back.

Rumil watched them from the doorway smiling at the sight. He hoped Legolas would understand, he hoped he would accept him. Thranduil released his son when he heard his lover enter the room.

"We need to speak with you Legolas." Thranduil said as he motioned for Rumil to enter.

Legolas looked from his father to Rumil then back again. "About what?" he was still embarassed that he had stolen Rumil's dagger.

Thranduil and Rumil sat on the bed across from Legolas. Both looked uncomfortable and slightly embarassed. What on earth was wrong with them? Legolas wondered. Wait...That look the just exchanged. Could it be? No that was absurd. Or was it? Did they love each other? By the Valar they did! And they wanted his blessing as Thranduil's son! Legolas smiled at them, he was certain what he would say now. Thranduil looked at Rumil, neither one looked ready to talk. Legolas took pity on them.

"It's ok. I understand and I am happy for you." Legolas said suddenly as he began to rebraid his hair.

Rumil and Thranduil looked over at him in shock. Neither had expected Legolas to accept them with such ease.

"Thank you my son." Thranduil rose and kissed his son on the cheek. "We must go see Celeborn now. I...We will see you at the banquet.

Rumil stood next to Thranduil and bowed slightly to Legolas before he followed Thraduil. Legolas laughed and finished his hair before he went to find Aragorn and Haldir.

---

Aragorn, Haldir, and Galadriel stood in the middle of the empty ballroom glaring at their problem. The problem being a very stubborn squirrel that refused to leave his nest. Suddenly Haldir started laughing.

"The Great Lady Galadriel confounded by a small squirrel!"

Galadriel shok her head at her son but soon she was laughing also. Aragorn looked at the two of them and decided that they were unbalanced. Shaking his head he leaned a ladder against the wall, he climbed up untill he was face to face with the squirrel. He carefully picked up the nest and squirrel and he climbed down the ladder. He walked the squirell outside and deposited it in a new tree. The squirell squeaked as if to say thak you.

"What is the great king of Gondor doing in a tree?" came a laughing voice from below.

Aragorn looked down and saw Legolas looking up at him. "Talking to a squirell oh princeling of Mirkwood!" Aragorn jumped lightly to the ground beside one of his loves. "How do you fair today?"

"Fine!" Legolas kissed Aragorn lightly on the lips. "Come else Haldir will get jealous."

Laughing they went inside to greet Haldir.

As we rowed away from Lorien my mind wandered to last nights farwell banquet. There had been food, music, and dancing. After dinner Lady Galadriel gifted us with many things including cloaks with pins, and many provisions. She had given each of them a specialized gift for their journey. After that the hobbits, Boromir, and Gimli headed off to sleep. For they had a long trek ahead of them on the morrow. Haldir, Aragorn, and I consumated our bond afterward we cried because we had to part. As we rowed away I could see him standing next to Galadriel and Celeborn. He loked so sad and lonely. He had made them promise that they would come back to him alive.

"Legolas?" a voice inturrupted my thoughts.

"Yes Master Dwarf?" I asked smiling trying not to show my sadness. It didn't work.

"Do not fret my fried you will see him again." Gimli said patting me on the shoulder.

"Thank you my friend." I said really smiling for the first time all day. Up ahead I could see Aragorn signaling for us to stop for the night. After we drug the boats ahore far enough so the tide did not reach them. I started a fire for it was growing cold. Sam cooked for everyone except me. I ate some lembas and tea, meat just did not sound good to me. I saw Boromir and Aragorn talking...Arguing really. Boromir was a good man, it was just the ring corrupting him. Then I heard Aragorn say something I did not expect.

"I would not take the rings within a hundred yards of your city!" Aragorn snapped as he walked away.

I saw anger, sadness, and many other emotions rioting through Boromir's eyes. Soon after Boromir and the others lay down to sleep. Only me and Aragorn were awake.

"Go to sleep Aragorn. I will keep watch." I said rather shortly. He dropped his head into his hands.

"So your mad at me also?"

"Yes." I snap. "He is only trying to help his city! He is a good man it is the ring that makes him think those things. He is trying to help YOUR city!"

"I know. But the ring cannot be used." Aragorn sighed and looked up into my eyes. My anger quickly melted at the emotions I saw in his eyes.

"I know. But you should apologize to him not me." I said softly as I pulled him into my arms. He eagerly returned my embrace. "I miss him also." I said guessing what was truly wrong with him. "I know." he whispered.

"Go to sleep Aragorn I will watch all night long." He settled down next to me and was soon fast asleep.

---

The next day was hell on earth. We landed at the Rauros falls while Aragorn told us what route we would take. Gimli was as usual displeased and was complaing very loudly. I looked around and noticed that Frodo and Boromir were gone. We all split up and went to look for them. When I came upon Aragorn fighting me and Gimli joined the fray.

"Aragorn go!" I shouted hopeing he understood I wanted him to find the halflings. No sooner had he ran away when I heard a sound that made my blood curdle.

"The horn of Gondor." I said feeling dread shroud me.

Me and Gimli ran to find Boromir but what wwe found made us cry. Aragorn was holding a dying Boromir, the halflings were missing. I watched my beloved talk to his kinsman, I watched Boromir die.

"I will not let the White City fall." I heard Aragorn swear. I would help him make sure of it I swore to myself. We placed Boromir's body, his weapons, horn, and many weapons of his slain enemies into a boat and let it drift down the falls. I watched Aragorn put on Boromir's bracers honoring his lost kinsman. I began to push the boats into the water but Aragorn stopped me. "You mean not to follow them." I said incredulous.

"We cannot abandon Merry and Pippin to torment and death. Not while we draw breath. We travel light. Lets hunt some orc." He said as he led us on the trail on the Uruk Hai.

---

We chased the Uruk for many days and nights untill human and dwarven phisology demanded we stop. Gimli started a small fire as I passed out lembas and water. Aragorn refused food but he drank water. He appeared distracted, he kept fingering Boromir's bracers. I knew Boromir's death affected him alot. Gimli offered to take watch so Aragorn walked out of the firelight to be alone. I followed him.

"Leave me alone Legolas." he said sharply. His words cut me deep, more so then he will ever know.

"I cannot. We are bonded I feel what you feel. Let me help." I plead with him.

"You cannot help me. Now let me be." Aragorn said rudely pushing me aside.

Tears of hurt welled up into my eyes as he pushed me aside. I felt wortless again like he didn't love me anymore. Hurt I turn and run away into the forest. I came upon a rock so I sat down crying. I pulled out my dagger and stared at it. I remembered the first time I cut myself I had used this very dagger. My father had given me this dagger when I came of age, he had been so proud of me. It had been after and Orc hunt, I had been injured with scratches and bruises. I noticed the more they hurt the less important the ache in my heart became. That night I secluded myself in my tent and I cut my arm for the first time. It felt good, it felt right. Soon the ache in my heart lessened and I began to do it on a daily basis. I roll up my sleeves and I place the tip of the dagger on my left arm. I allowed the tip to graze my arm causing a white line to appear. I played the tip gently on my arm causing many thin white lines to appear. As I prepared to cut deeper a hand stopped me. Startled I look up into the eyes of Aragorn. He said nothing he simply rearranged the dagger in my hand untill it was pointed outward at him. He guided my hand untill the dagger tip was placed at his heart. I look into his eyes and saw how determined he was.

"If you want to cut yourself then you'd better drive this dagger into my heart right now. Everytime you hurt yourself a part of me dies. So do it swiftly instead of slowly." I saw tears spring into his eyes. "I am sorry I pushed you. The fellowship has broken...But I will not fail the little ones."

Saying nothing I dropped the dagger and kissed him hard on his lips. He truly cared for me! My heart sang as he gathered me into his arms and kissed me back. We slowly made our way back to camp where Gimli sat waiting, he smiled at us and told us to sleep. Aragorn laid down and pulled me into his arms again and we drifted off to sleep.

By the time I awoke Legolas and Gimli were already awake and ready to go. Sighing I stood and got my things ready for the days trek. I refused the lembas and water that Legolas offered. I saw him and Gimli exchange a worried glance. Shrugging it off I started on the trail of the Uruk again. Legolas caught sight of them several hundred yards away. We were finally catching up with them. We began to run again. We ran for hours and hours stopping only once when something odd caught my eye. It was a lorien leaf brooch.

"Not idly do the leaves of Lorien fall." I muttered. "They are still alive. Come on!"

We started running faster if thats possible, spurred on by the tidbit we received. Suddenly the wind changed and the Uruk picked up speed. I knew they had caught our scent. We ran untill we reached a big stand of rock. Upon reaching it we heard tons of hoofbeats approaching. We quickly ducked behind the rocks. We saw hundreds of thousands or Rohirrim run past us. We jumped out revaling ourselves.

"What news of the east riders of rohan?" I shouted trying to get their attention.

Immediatly they surrounded us with spears pointed and ready to strike.

"What busines does an elf, dwarf, and a man have in the Riddermark?" their leader sneered at us.

"I will give you my name in exchange for yours." Gimli snapped. The leader glowered at him and dismounted saying.

"I would cut your head from your shoulders if you stood but a bit higher." the leader threatened steping toward Gimli.

Legolas quickly drew back his bow and aimed it at the leader saying, "You would be dead before your stroke fell."

At once several riders made to kill my beloved. Raising my hands I stepped in between Legolas and the leader.

"We are tracking a group of Uruk Hai westward across the plains. They took some of our group." I explain. "I am Aragorn son of Arathorn, this is Gimli son of Gloin, and Legolas Greenleaf from Mirkwood."

"I am Eomer. We tracked and killed the Uruk last night. Wwe stacked and burned their bodies oveer there." Eomwr pointed a bit behind them and I could see a smoldering pile of ashes.

"Were there two hobbits with them?" Gimli asked desperatly.

"They would be but children to your eyes." I clarified.

Eomer shook his head slowly his eyes showing his sadness. Legolas stepped forward and gripped Eomer's tunic desperatly. What ever he had started to say was cut short by a man. One of the men nearest to Eomer and Legolas raised his sword and hit Legolas over the head with the hilt. Legolas crumpled to the ground under the force of the blow. I gave a low cry and caught him before he fell. I lowered him gently to the ground. A shiver of dread ran up my spine a gash ran across the side of his face and his eyes were closed.

"Legolas! Legolas!" I said over and over while slapping him lightly on the face trying to rouse him. He lay limp and unresponding in my arms. The gash was so close to his temple.

"Can you help him Aragorn?" Gimli asked worried.

"I do not know. The blow was so close to his temple and elves never close their eyes." I could feel tears threating to spill over.

Eomer knelt next us anger and sadness written on his face.

"HE WASN'T GOING TO DO ANY THING! HE WAS WORRIED!" I cried out angrily. "The little ones mean the world to him."

Eomer nodded knowingly. "He will be properly and severly reprimanded later. What do you require now to help him?"

I pondered the question for a moment. "A fire and hot water. I have the proper herbs and salves but..."

"Come to our camp it is in a secure location. We will help you." Eomer offered rising and calling for horses.

I nodded and scooped Legolas up into my arms. Standing I turned to Gimli. "Will you go and look for the hobbits where the men told us?"

Gimli nodded and began to walk toward the ashes. I saw two men follow him alarmed I turned to Eomer.

"Do not worry they go to protect him. I thought you would ask him to search for your friends." he shrugged embarrassed.

"Thank you." I handed Legolas to Eomer while I mounted the offered horse I then took him from Eomer.

I followed them to their camp a few miles away, it had trees along one side and rocks alonger another side. It was well protected. Eomer took Legolas from me and entered a tent. I followed and watched him lay Legolas on the small cot. He left and I dug out herbs and bandages. Eomer reentered carrying a pot of hot water, several cloths, and a mug. After he sat the items on a small side table he turned to leave.

"Please stay." I ask. "I may need your help."

He nods and sits in a chair and watches my actions. I put some water in a mug and put a handful of herbs in to steep. Then I tenderly bathe his wound and I place a salve on it followed by a bandage. When I am done he slowly opens his eyes. He sees me and smiles but then he grimaces as a wave of pain hits him.

"I hurt..." he whispers in elvish.

"It's a good thing ou have such a hard head." I feebly joke talking in elvish also. "Drink this. Twill get rid of your pain."

I make him drink it all down and he lays back against the pillows exhausted. "Where am I?" he wonders aloud.

"My camp close to Edoras." Eomer replies in kind.

We stare at him for a moment taken aback that he not oly knew elvish but spoke it flawlessly as well. He shrugs.

"I am always the envoy to Lorien for my uncle King Theoden."

"Your kin to Theoden and your out here in a camp?" Legolas says shocked.

"His mind has been taken over, He is not himself. Orcs roam over our land freely, Saruman looks to Rohan for his own. Me and my men have been banished from Rohan simply because we want Rohan free." Eomer says vhemently.

I sighed it did sound like Sarumans tricks alright but I did not ay anything.

"Milord?" a young man poked his head inside.

"Yes?" Eomer asked rising.

"The dwarf approaches with three men...I thought only two stayed behind?" he looked confused.

"Two did." Eomer strode out of the tent and I followed him.

As they approached I could not believe my eyes. It couldn't be! Could it? Gandalf smiled at me as he dismounted.

"Greetings Aragorn." he said.

I look over at Gimli disbeleiving. "The hobbits?" I ask Gimli suddely terrifed at what the awnser might be.

"They are fine and alive. They are with Treebeard the Ent." Gandalf awnsered my querry. "Now what is wrong with Legolas?"

I lead him inside the tent to where Legolas lay sleeping. I explain what had happened. Gandalf nodded and said "He should be healed by tomorrow." I nod agreeing with ihs assumption.

"Whats this?" he askes rolling up Legolas's sleeves reavaling the myriad scars on his forarms. Wearliy I tell him everything that had transpired since his fall. I tell him about the cutting, the hate, the torment his father heaped on him, his attempted suicide, and finely the three way bond me, him and Haldir share. Gandalf sat listening to my tale.

"I belieive I shall talk with Thranduil later." he muses out loud.

"No need." I say as I proceed to tell him about Thranduil coming to Lorien, about Thranduil and Rumil, and about how he had got hurt this time. I also talk about Boromir's fall and the guilt I carry. We sat and talked for hours untill Gandalf rose and ordered me to bed. I balk at the idea but he isn't having any of it.

"Into the bed with you mate young one. We leave for Edoras tomorrw now sleep. I shall make sure Gimli does as well." his eyes twinkle with mischeif. "Do not worry I shall mak sure no one inturrupts you use of a real bed."

I blush and the innuendo in the statement but shrug and climb into bed next to Legolas. I carefully gather him into my arms and fall into a dreamless slumber.

When I awake in the morning the pain is all but gone. The barest twinges remain and soon those are gone as well. Aragorn is holding me and for that I am grateful. We have had only one chance to be alone since Lorien. It was after we camped for the night and Boromir had first watch. I slipped away to be alone and Aragorn followed. He was afaid of what i'd do. We talked about Haldir alot and finaly we found solace in each others bodies. The tent flap is pulled back shaking me from my memories. Gandalf stands there smiling at me.

"Well well Legolas you look none the worse for wear." he said teasingly. "How do you feel? Can you ride?"

"I feel fine and yes I can ride." I awnser in a low voice so I did not wake Aragorn.

Gandalf nodded "We leave in half an hour. Someone shall bring you breakfast."

I nod as he leaves then I turn to Aragorn to wake him. I see that he is already awake and smiling. He says nothing as he kisses me. I want this to turn into something more but the arrival of breakfast makes it not so. We eat and dress for the day within the hour we are riding toward Edoras. When we get there we are ordered to disarm. I hand them my knives and bow my eyes promising swift retibution if they are taken or mishandled. They wish to take Gandalfs staff but after he assures them it is harmless we are allowed to pass. A smarmy man hisses at us and whispers things into the Kings ear. Gandalf attempts to free him from Saruman's grasp. Me and Aragorn take care of all that oppose him. Soon Theoden is freed and Grima is running toward Isengard. Aragorn and Gimli sit eating and smoking whilst Gandalf and the King speak. I stand near my love. I hear the king say he will not risk open war.

"Open war is upon yu weather you risk it or not." Aragorn points out only to geet a sharp reply.

"Last I checked Theoden not Aragorn ruled in Rohan." he sneered before he told us that him and his people would make the stand at Helm's Deep.

I ahake with anger at the King's words. Aragorn is heir to Gondor not just some lowly ranger! He is trying to help Theoden's people. I glare at the king and he gulps and turns away. Gandalf rides to find Eomer to bring him to our aid. Soon all the women, children, old, sick, well, and young are marching with us to Helm's Deep. I ride next to Aragorn and Eowyn. Gimli is regaling her with dwarven tales and Aragorn is flirting with her. I feel jealousy stir within me but I squash it. He is just being nice. Right? I say nothing as I ponder my beloveds actions. He looks sidelong at me and smiles reassuring me of our bond. Suddenly wargs are upon us and we stay back to fight and protect the people of Rohan. I lose sight of Aragorn in the melee and instead concentrate on staying alive. Soon it is over and Aragorn is nowhere in sight. We question an Orc and he tells us he fell. I kill the Orc in my anger. I stand next to the precipice crying, screaming at the gods. I cannot feel him. He is dead. Only Haldir's bond is keeping me alive. I hear Theoden approach.

"Leave the dead I hear him say as he squeezes my shoulder. We ride away. I cry the whole way to Helm's Deep. When we arrive Theoden gives me and Gimli rooms and leave us to ourselves. I lay on the bed crying for hours I lay there alone. A soft rap startles me.

"Come." my voice is raspy from the hours of crying.

The door opens and Theoden enters. I sit up startled even more.

"Please sit milord." I geasture to the only chair in the room.

He sits. "You do not have to call me lord Legolas. Gimli tells me you are a Price of the elven realm of Mirkwood."

I nod.

"We are equals then. I wish to ask you something."

I sit waiting.

"You and Aragorn were lovers were you not?"

I sit speechless. "Yes." I say hesitantly know how some men viewed homosexuality. His next words reassure me.

"Oh do not worry I understand the bond between warriors. Before my marrige I had a male lover. HE fell in battle also."

Tears well up in my eyes. He understood how I felt.

"But I am confused I was told that when an elven heart is broken the elf dies also. Why are you still alive Legolas?" he asked gently.

"We were also bonded with another on my kin. A sentry of Lorien named Haldir. Tis our bond that keeps me here. My love for him is strong. Should I die here he shall perish also." I say slowly.

He nods. "Rest Legolas I feel that things will be alright. I nod but my heart tells me nay. He smiles at me and he exits the room.

---

The next day I am standing outside with the sun on my face. I take joy in the simple things now for soon I feel that I will be dead. Gimli sits next to Eowyn and they speak in low voices. I can tell that they are worried about me. I say nothing my attention rivited by a commotion at the gates. I gasp as I see Aragorn wearily walk up to me. Stunned I say the only thing that comes to mind.

"Your late."

He smiles and hugs me and I eagerly return the embrace. I hand him the evenstar pendant and he takes it gratefully. I know that he loves her also so I am not jealous. After the war he will marry her and me and Haldir will live in Gondor close to our beloved. Arwen being a elf will not hinder our relationship and we will not hinder hers. For neither I nor Haldir can give Gondor an heir.

"You look terrible." I say smiling this time. He smiles back and asks me to take him to Theoden.

---

Later on at night our plan laid out I drag Aragorn to my room. I make him rest knowing that soon we could be parted forever. When I awake he is gone I find him in the armory surround by the 'troops'. That word being not enough to describe what I see. The old and the extremly young beiing outfitted. Only three hundred of them. I am outraged. I turn to Aragorn angrily, spoiling for a fight.

"three hundred against ten thousand? This is folly! They will all die!" I shout. All the men fall quiet as Aragorn says.

"Then I shall die as one of them!"

I stare at him before I turn and leave the room I cry and rage in our room for a few hours before I seek him out.

I find him putting on his armor. I pick up his sword and hand it to him before he can. He looks shocked as I say.

"I was wrong to give into dispair. You haven't led us wrong yet. Pplease forgive me." I whisper not looking at him. He rasies my chin and smiles before he kisses me

Suddenly a horn sounds. It was not a horn of man but of an elf. Startled we race for the stairs untill we reach the courtyard. We see hundreds of thousands of elves marching in. At the front is Haldir! My heart gives a leap he is speaking to Theoden. He says that men and elves should honor the alliances of old. Theoden looks slightly shocked as Aragorn leaps down and hugs Haldir. Haldir is taken aback but hugs his lover back. I stand watching untill Theoden turns and requests Aragorns presence in ten miuntes. Aragorn leads Haldir to me and I hug him then we leave to go to our room.

I follow Aragorn and Legolas to their room to spend a few miuntes alone with them. Aragorn must wait upon the king in less the nine minutes. Only nine minutes alone with one of my loves. I will spend a bit longer with Legolas. What they do not know is I looked into Galadriel's mirror and I know my fate. I will die tonight. I will battle an Uruk and he will kill me. Aragorn shall cradle me as I pass into the halls of waiting. I shiver as I think that I have less then four hours to live. I will spend them with the ones I love. We reach Aragorn and Legolas's room and enter it. I sit upon the bed and watch as Legolas bids Aragorn goodbye. But before he can leave I must ask him something imporant.

"Aragorn will you lead the elves tonight? FOr you are fluent in common and elvish. I am not good in common neither is any of our men. Someone must be fluent in both in order to command both men and elves." I ask standing.

He nods and extends his hand and I clasp it in the warrior way. He pulls me in for a quick hug and kiss then he is gone. I watch him leave before I turn to Legolas. We are both dressed for battle do this is not the time for carnal needs. He lays on the bed and I lay facing him. We hold each other and rest for several hours before a knock on our door rouses us. He gets up and opens the door, Rumil stands there looking for me. Orophin did not, could not come. He has a wife and young child to care for and this is a suicide mission. I beckon my brother inside he looks at Legolas for permission. Legolas reaches out and hugs his fathers lover. We lay on the bed holding and talking to each other. Thranduil wanted to come as well but Mirkwood's prince was already here and they needed their king. He was reluctant to let Rumil come though knowing many would die. But in the end Rumil won and kissed his lover goodbye as we marched to our deaths. I do not know Rumil's fate for that was clouded int he mirror. I only know my fate and know next to nothing could stop it. I hold my brother and lover close, telling them how much I loved them. They seemed worried about my behavior. For I told no one about my visions only Celeborn and Galadriel knew and that was to many already. All to soon Aragorn comes and tells us that the Uruk are coming. The four of us hug and say our goodbyes just in case we did not get the chance. We walked out on to the battlements where the elves and men waited. I stood in between Aragorn and Rumil as we watched the Uruk coming closer and closer. We made our bows ready and soon the Uruk were charging and we loosed our arrows. We barely made a dent in their ranks as they came closer and closer. Soon we were out of arrows and we used our swords. There were so many of them and not enough of us. We slayed all that approached and we knocked down ladder after ladder. Many men fell and did not get up. The children were slaughtered next to the old men. We fought bravely but it was folly we could not win this alone. Suddenly an explosion ripped apart the walls of the fort. I saw my brother caught in the explosion fall and not move.

"Rumil!" I screamed racing to his side. He was alive but barely so, his breathing was shallow. If this battle did not end soon he would die. I jumped to my feet and stood protecting him from all who approached. I heard Aragorn yelling for me to retreat, I turned to see him when a burning pain raced up my back. I turned and saw a huge Uruk behind me. I fell to the ground, the last thing I saw before my eyes closed was the bodies of my kin, my brother lying on the ground dead. It struck me as useless and dispair swamped me. There was no hope we would all die and Sauron would take back the ring. I closed my eyes as I hit the ground. I would die here cold and alone surrounded by my kin, my brother, and soon my lovers.

---

A/N: Now it's Aragorn's POV.

They are everywhere slaughtering our paltry defenses. Taking no pity and showing no mercy. They relished the kill and our blood, be it elven or human. I hear Theoden shouting for a retreat back into the citadel. I yell at Haldir but when he turns I see him get hit. The Uruk behind him is grinning as he slays my loveer. Screaming I run to where he lays and I slay the Uruk that dared to touch my lover. I cradle the broken, bleeding body next to my heart. His eyes are closed and his breathing is shallow. I know he will not live long, I pray that he will live till battle's end so I can tend him. I place him on the ground before standing. My breath catches in my throat as I see Rumil laying next to Haldir. Rumil was just as bad off as Haldir. I send a prayer to the Valar to keep them alive. I signal to Legolas he runs over and we manage to carry them back into the citadel. Theoden is watching us as we lay them on the ground in a safe place. Legolas told Theoden about us and Haldir when I was gone. I convince him to ride out with the remaining troops in one last glorious stand. He agreess and we ride out together to face our destiny. Suddenly I see Eomer and Gandalf riding down the hill toward the keep. They quickly dispached the remaining Uruk Hai. I race back into the keep and to Haldir's side. Gandalf enters a moment later and he examines Haldir then Rumil. When he turns to us his face is grave.

"They are both in dire need of help. Human healers can do nothing for them and I am only one man. I can save one of them. Which one shall I save?" He says looking at me and Legolas awaiting our answer.

Legolas shoook his head in disbelief. How could they choose? Who should decide? His friend or one of his bond mates? He turned to Aragorn, tears running down his face. Aragorn saw the indecision in his lovers eyes, saw the tears running down his face. He turned to Gandalf.

"I cannot make such a decision. Save whichever one you think will live. Save one of them. Saes," Aragorn said lapsing into his first tongue.

Gandalf nodded and turned to Rumil and he began his work. Legolas shook his head violently at Gandalf's choice. He quickly turned on his heel and ran out into the night. Aragorn's cries echoing behind him. He ran out onto the battlements and froze at the sight. Hundreds of thousands of bodies lay under the bright light of Ithil. He gasped at the sight of his comrades dead, his friends bodies cold and unmoving. In all his long life he had never faced such carnage before. Elves were immortal! They were not meant to die in such a manner then discarded and forgotten. He could see Eomer's men seperating the bodies. The Orc and Uruk were tossed into a heap to be burned, the men and elves laid out reverently. Legolas stumbled away into the night, running for the keep. He ran up the stairs and into a small tower balcony. He knelt on the floor staring out over the battlefield. Dispair was once again his constant companion. Without hesitation or regret he yanked out his dagger. He bared his right arm before he slashed and slashed his arm. He sobbed uncontrollably as he did this. This was his pain, his pleasure, his constant companion, and his life. But not his love. Haldir would die but he would stay for Aragorn untill Aragorn passed. Then he would die of a broken heart. Gandalf had chosen Rumil's life over Haldir's and Legolas knew he could forgive Rumil but never Gandalf. He switched the dagger to the other hand and slashed and slashed at his left arm. Soon the bright, crimson blood was racing down his arms and onto the stone floor. He bent over and cried his broken heart onto the ground.

---

Eomer watched his men clean up the carnage from the battle. He said a quick prayer to the Valar that all the fallen men and elves would at last know peace. He saw a golden light at the corner of his eye. Turning he saw the elf Legolas standing and staring at the aftereffects of battle. He saw wild and untamed grief and dispair in those pale blue eyes. So much that it worried him when Legolas ran bacck into the keep. Eomer followed him slowly, giving the elf time to himself. His pace quickened when he heard crying. Crying filled with dispair and hoplessness. He turned and saw Legolas bent over his knees sobbing uncontrollably. Eomer moved over till he was in front of the elf and he pulld him into an embrace. Legolas unconsiouly leaned into the embrace, forgetting about his cut arms. He heard Eomer gasp and pull away. Legolas suddenly remembered the cuts and he tried to get away. Eomer held onto Legolas preventing his escape. He had seen the violent cuts and wondered who had hurt the elf. Then he saw the elvish dagger on the ground and he swore softly.

"Legolas! What hapened!" Eomer said as he took Legolas's chin in his grip, forcing the elf to look into his eyes.

"Nothing!" Legolas said as he tried to squirm free.

"Like hell. Why did you do this? Why?" Eomer asked as he tore his outer tunic and bandaged Legolas's arms.

"Because it makes me forget the pain! Makes me feel do ALIVE! My lover is dying on a table in YOUR great hall and you ask why I do this?" Legolas shouted angrily at the horseman.

Eomer's heart broke at the imapassioned, tearful voice. "Aragorn is dying?"

"Nay. Me and Aragorn bonded to another elf. His name is...was Haldir. He was captain of the elves tonight. Him and his brother, Rumil, were wounded so bad human healers cannot help them. Gandalf can only save one and he chose Rumil." Legolas made another attempet to get away from Eomer.

Legolas could hear footsteps approaching them in the tower. Eomer heard them also and he stood to face whomever it was.

"Elf are ya up here?" came Gimli's rough voice.

Legolas's eyes widened at the thought of Gimli finding him like this! But before he could awnser the dwarf turned the corner and spied them. Gimli's eyes narrowed when he saw blood on the floor, and Eomer keeping Legolas from fleeing. Then he saw the knife.

"Legolas! Tell me ya dinna cut yerself again?" Gimli said coming forward and looking into the elfs eyes.

"Aye he did. Does he do this often?" Eomer asked the dwarf.

"Aye. Thought he quit doing it though. Legolas Aragorn wants to see you." Gimli said taking Legolas's hand in his.

Legolas and Eomer stood and followed the dwarf back into the main hall. Legolas stared at the sight before him. A blonde elf leaned over Haldi's prone form, healing him. While Gandalf helped Rumil. The elf looked so familiar to him. Aragorn turned and smiled when he saw Legolas, but the smile quickly disappeared when he saw the bandaged arms.

"Legolas! Oh Valar what did you do?" Aragorn said as he embraced his lover.

Legolas shook as tears fell down his face. "I'm so sorry Aragorn. Please forgive me." he whispered as he buried his face in Argorn's neck.

"Shhhhhh. It's alright." Aragorn said as he rubbed Legolas's back in a comforting manner.

"Who is that helping Haldir?"

"Glorfindel."

Legolas stared at Aragorn incredulously. "He came from Imladris to help them humans?"

"Aye. He heard about our bonding and Galadriel told him somethg bad would happen to Haldir. SO he came along. He knows alot about healing as Lord Elrond has showed him."

Legolas nodded and stared at the blonde elda's back as he worked on his other lover. Finally after what seemed like an eternity Gandalf smiled and had Rumil moved to bed. He would be ok, sore but he would live to go home to Thranduil. Glorfindel straightened and smiled slightly at Legolas and Aragorn, his brow furrowing at Legolas's bloodstained arms. Galadriel told him about the prince's cutting bu the didn't belive it...till now.

"He should be ok. We need to move to a more comfortable place." Glorfindel said staring at the prince.

Aragorn nodded and gathered Haldir up into his arms, while Glorfindel took Legolas aside.

"Legolas tell me what has happened to make you do that." Glorfindel said pointing at the elf's cuts.

Glorfindel sat Legolas down and unwound the bandages on the prince's arms. He bathed the angry red cuts and re wrapped them with clean bandages. He silently mixed a few herbs into a glass of mulled wine. He handed the cup to Legolas and watched him drink it all. All this was done in complete silence. Legolas was mortified that the elda knew his horrid secret. Glorfindel was horrified by the prince's actions. In all his long life he had never witnessed an elf self destruct like this one seemed to be doing.

"Why?" he asked sitting in front of Legolas.

"At first because of my father but now things are progressing. I can't seem to stop! I try I really do but..." Legolas looked down into the empty goblet.

"But what?" Glorfindel prodded taking the goblet and setting it aside.

"When I don't do it, my arms itch and burn. I feel this compulsion to cut! I don't know whats wrong with me! I finally have everything I wanted! My father, bond mates, respect...But I still feel the need! Whats wrong with me???" Legolas whispered shaking at the depth of emotion that ran through him.

Glorfindel reached out and embraced the young prince. He didn't know what to do! He had never heard of such a thing before.

"I had word sent to Lord Elrond about Rumil and Haldir. I am certain he will come. Perhaps he will be able to help you. I am sorry mellonamin I just don't know how to help. But I will be here if you ever need to talk."

Legolas nodded and tears fell down his face at Glorfindel's words. Could Lord Elrond help him? No one else seemed to be able to. He has once felt like no one cared, like he didn't matter. Now many were supporting him, helping him. Had they been there all along? Had he refused to see that he was liked? Galadriel, Celeborn, Glorfindel, Haldir, Aragorn, and many, many others were desperatly trying to help him. Why? Was he worth saving?

Yes

The word appeared in his mind from out of no where.

They love you. They have always loved you. They always will. Do not dispair young Greenleaf I will help guide you. The darkness cannot have you. I will not allow it!

Legolas gasped as darkness consumed him, he slid down into his own mind. The last thing he heard was Glorfindel saying his name over and over.

---

He was standing in a empty room, in a place that looked like Rivendell. It looked like Lord Elrond's library. Legolas looked around confused and vey scared.

Do not be scared little one

Legolas turned to see who was in the room with him. He saw a stunning elf woman. She had long black hair, blue eyes, and she wore a white shimmering gown.

"Who are you?"

I am of the Valar sent to help guide you.

"Guide me?"

Your soul cries out in pain and agony. Your heart has gone dark with dispair. This is not natural of the first born.

Legolas cried at the tender words. "I do not know how to stop!"

That you are able to admit you have a problem is the first step to peace and healing.

"Is it? Whats next then? I feel such pain! I know my problem worries my friends and family but I do not know how to stop!"

The Lady Valar embrace the distraught elf.

Next you must make peace with your past. You need to speak with your father. Only once the past is buried then you can begin to heal and move on.

"But I have talked to him. we are starting over!"

"Yes you did talk...about everything but what you need to talk about. You talk around the past. Around his words and actions. Around you mother."

"My mother?"

She is the key. Once you talk about her you will understand. I will always be here little one. Go now and rest comfortably knowing I am near.

"I thank you lady...." Legolas whispered as darkness again consumed him.

---

A cool cloth was resting on his forehead, blankets surrounded him, and a sense of peace penetrated him. He was safe and loved. The Valar be praised for their help, love, and understanding. He forced his eyes open and he looked around. He saw Aragorn and Glorfindel talking in low voices. Glorfindel was saying something about exhaustion, stress, and emotional overload. He realized they were talking about him! He moaned slightly as pain raced throug his over abused arms. Instantly Aragorn was by his side.

"Shhhhh...Your tired both physicaly, emotionaly, and mentaly. You need rest. Sleep. I love you." Aragorn said as he softly kissed Legolas.

Legolas smiled feeling warm and comfortable again. He droped off in to elven reverie.

Aragorn sighed at Theoden's words and had to admit that the King was right. Gondor needed help and needed it now. She needed her rightful heir and king. But Aragorn was lothe to leave Legolas and Haldir behind. Both needed lots of rest and time to recover from their various injuries. Legolas seemed to be exhausted emotionaly mostly. He had watched hundreds of elves die. Death just wasn't part of the elven lifestyle. They were immortal and deadly with a bow so seeing ones comrades die just wasn't usual. Once of twice they would lose an elf or two to an Orc attack but nothing of this magnitude since the last Alliance. He didn't know if Legolas would even stay behind. He was stubborn like that. He, Gimli, the remaining elves, and Rohan men would march to Gondor. Aragorn went to the room where Rumil and Haldir lay recuperating. Haldir had woken late last night and was stunned that he wasn't in Mandos. He had smiled weakly at Aragorn before he fell asleep again comforted by his lover's nearness. Rumil was practicaly healed as his wounds were of the magickal nature. The magickal blast conjured by Saurman had preyed on his deep doubts and fears. Fears about his love for Mirkwood's king, Galadriel's leaving, and Orophin's distant nature. Aragorn sat at Haldir's bedside and watched the handsome elf sleep.

---

Legolas awoke to a beautiful day and a light heart. For the first time in a long time he didn't feel the need to cut. The darkness had left his heart and he was free to feel without doubts tinging his mind. He got up and dressed in freshly laundered leggings and a tunic. He brushed his long hair and braided it. He walked out into the hall and outside. He saw Eomer standing and watching the bodies of his men being laid out. So many had fallen, so many had died. He would make sure they did not die in vain.

"I wish to thank you for all you did to help me." Legolas said to Eomer.

Eomer turned and smiled at the hesitant elf. "Your welcome."

"I wish to explain myself to you. Lest you think less of me..." Legolas began but he was cut off by Eomer.

"You do not have to explain yourself. I do not think less of you for your faults. Elves may appear perfect but they are not. You are as just fallible as men, hobbits, and dwarfs." Eomer said gently.

"Yes I know that now. I have never seen so many elves die in such a battle. I have lost an elf or two. But not so much at one time." Legola said sadly.

"Did you know many of them?" Eomer asked geniunely concerned.

"Yes. Many of them I helped Haldir train in the arts of warfare." he explained gently.

"I'm sorry for your loss." Legolas was inturrupted by the arrival of Eowyn.

"Legolas? Haldir is awake and he wishes to see you." she said smiling at how he perked up.

"I will go see him then. Good bye milady, Eomer." he said as he turned and raced inside.

Eowyn and Eomer smiled at one another and continued to watch the clean up and pray for the lost souls.

---

Legolas knocked on the door to Haldir's room before he entered. He saw Aragorn talking to Haldir who looked much better. Both smiled at him as he entered but he saw the sadness lurking in Haldir's eyes. He knew that Aragorn had told him about his cutting. He sat down on the bed next to Haldir. Being careful not to jostle the bed to much lest he hurt his love.

"How do you fare?" Haldir asked.

Legolas laughed slightly. "I should be asking you that melamin."

"I know."

Legolas sighed and lowered his eyes to the ground not saying anything.

"Why?"

"I thought you would die and I wanted to hurt." was all he said.

Haldir and Aragorn didn't say anything for a long minute. Coming to some unspoken decision Aragorn spoke.

"I have to lead the remaning men and elves to Gondor. You and Haldir must stay behind to recover."

"WHAT??? I am not staying behind!" Legolas jumped up and started pacing.

"Haldir needs you more then I do. If one of stays behind it will aid in his recovery. The bond will help him." Aragorn explained gently.

Legola's shoulders slumped slightly. "Is this a punishment?"

"What? No! Why would you think that?" Aragorn got up and pulled Legolas close to him.

"I don't know. Will you come back alive to us?" Legolas asked pulling Aragorn close to him.

"Yes. I promise." He said as he lay Legolas on one side of Haldir and he lay on the other. Together they offered comfort to one another before they fell asleep. Tomorrow they would seperate....possibly forever.

---

Aragorn rose early the next morning and bid his lovers goodbye. He promised them he would stay alive and come back for them. Haldir, Eomer, and Legolas stood watching Aragorn, Theoden, the twins, and the armies leaving. They stood and watched untill they couldn't see them any more. Eomer turned and went inside followed by Legolas and Haldir. The days and weeks went by oh so slowly. Rumil and Haldir recovered with no other ill effects and they listened to Legolas. Legolas talked and talked knowing it would help him to recover from the darkness. Eomer gave them duties so they would have somehing to do. A month later a convoy of elves stopped at Helm's Deep led by Lord Elrond. Arwen hugged Haldir and Legolas happy for them and grateful they were alive. She knew about the bonding and she told them she would marry Aragorn and the four of them would be happy. She would not intrude upon their relationship and they would return the courtesy. Aragron needed heirs and they could not give them. Elrond smiled at the elves assuring them that he to was happy for them.

---

Several weeks r anr an official summons arrived from Gondor. Frodo had destroyed the ring, Sauron was defeated, and Aragorn was to be crowned king. The summons asked that Haldir, Legolas, Rumil, Arwen and Elrond come to the coronation. It also stated that Lady Galadriel and Lord Celeborn would be there as well. A seperate summons told the sad tale of Theoden's death. Aragorn expressed his deepest sympathies to the new King Eomer. He also invited Eomer even though he knew theking cold not come. Eomer had to lead his people back to Edoras and begin re building Rohan. They rode out a first light and arrived at Gondor two days later. Haldir and Legolas spent that night wrapped around their lover and bond mate. They reassured Aragorn they would stay in Gondor and help him re build. Arwen was just another part to their complex relationship and she would make them all happy. It is not in the nature of elves to be jealous. Why spend time hating someone else when sharing is s preferable option? Elven hearts hold no such ideas like 'mine' and 'don't touch'. It is normal almost common place for multiple elves to share amongst themselves. The next day Aragorn and Arwen were married human style and crowned King and Queen of Gondor. Faramir was proclaimed Steward and Haldir was made Captain of the Royal Guard and Advisor to the King. Legolas made Chief Advisor which made Erestor snicker because poor Legolas had no idea how trying such a position could be. The day ended with much dancing and merry making for now an era of peace had begun.



Finis?