"Im mela lle!" Elrohir felt a gentle hand carressing away the tears from his cheeks. "I am so sorry for leaving you, melme-nin but we both knew this would happen sooner or later. Seas, my love, stop crying." "Im mela lle."
Elrohir nearly chocked on those often spoken words. Speaking them today was different, sad... "You cannot leave me. You cannot do this to me. I love you."
"And I love you too and it breaks my heart to see you cry like this."
"I will die soon, melme. I feel it in my heart."
"No."
"I will and there is no denying it."
"You cannot. We have always been together. We wanted to stay together till the end of the world."
"I know I promised it, but I just cannot keep it. We did not leave on time."
"We could leave now."
"I would rather spend the time that is left to me with you than try to get to the havens in time."
"But there you would not die."
"It is still four days till we get there. I will not make it that far. I am feeling that I am getting weaker. I have to focus hard on not falling asleep even while we are speaking."
"It is just four more days. We can make it. Promise to try."
He gripped his lover's arm and looked into his grey eyes. "I will. But you will have to promise me something else." Elrohir faced him with a slight frown on his forehead.
"As you wish. I will promise it, if you promise to try to reach the havens."
"You will not take your life when I'm gone."
"But I cannot go on without you."
"You will carry the thought and the memories of both of us."
"But I cannot go to the havens without you. I do not have the strengh for it. I cannot leave you in Middle-earth if I leave."
"I do not ask that of you. Burn my body. Take my ashes to the haven with you. As well as my heart, my memories and my love."
"I could never burn your body."
"But you cannot keep a corpse close to you."
"If I would burn you I could never see your wonderful eyes again."
"You will. Just look into the mirror."
Elrohir faced his twin, his desperation clearly shown in the beautiful grey eyes that mirrored those that were focused on him. Elladan's eyes were filled with tears as well. They looked at each other silently and finally he nodded.
"A promise for a promise."
"Yes. I promise to try everything to get to the havens with me. And you promise not to take your life and never to forget me."
"I promise."
Elladan gently took his twins and hand and placed them over his heart, then placed his own hands over his brother's heart. "I love you, Elrohir, I know this is hard for you. It is hard for me as well. But I could not let you go, I could not die with the knowledge that the one I love the most will take his life." Elrohir rewarded him with a weak smile. "I love you as well. The knowledge that I carry our love and your heart will make me strong, but there is still hope that we reach the havens in time. Let us ride on." Elladan smiled and placed a sweet kiss on his twin's lips. "If that is what you wish we will do so."
And on they had ridden. But though there was only a few more hours of riding Elladan had shook his head and told him that he couldn't go on. He hugged his twin close and covered his face in the soft black hair. "I love you, Elladan Elrondion. And only for you it is that I will live on. Only for you I will go to the havens and burn your body. I would take my life immediatly after you closed your eyes if it was my choice. It is your choice to force me to go on. But I will never love again. I could not."
Elladan shook his head. "Do not say that, melme. I want you to be happy." He gently carressed his younger twins hair and kissed it desperatly, knowing he would never be able to be strong enough to live without his twin. But that was not for Elrohir to know. He needed him to go on. He needed to know that the love of his life wouldn't take his life and destroy all what was left of their love by taking their memories with him.
When Elladan felt that the life would leave him he held Elrohir away to look into the eyes of his love one last time. "Always remember I love you. Our love cannot die if you carry it with you. As I will not really die as long as you remeber me." Elrohir touched his twins cheeks tenderly. When Elladan was about to close his eyes he seemed to remember something. "This is for you, melme. You know I have carried ever since you gave it to me. They always teased me about wearing a necklace, but to me it was the symbol of our love." Elrohir smiled. "You should not have carried it if they teased you." "I would have done anything for you, Elrohir." Elrohir allowed his twin to put the necklace around his neck and looked at the pendant. Elladan nodded. "Yes, I added it, it will be useful if you are going to need something to carry my ashes with you." Elrohir swallowed. "Forgive me, melme. I am used to the thought by now. I did not mean to hurt your feelings." He felt Elladan tenderly kissing his lips.
"Im mela lle."
"And I will love you for all my life."
"Tell ada and nana that I loved them. I really did. As much as I loved Arwen. But never as much as you. I never loved anyone as much as I loved you, Elrohir."
"I know. I can feel it, I am feeling the same."
"Promise that you will try to lead a happy life. Promise to remember the happy memories as well as the sad ones."
"I promise, melme, do not trouble yourself."
Elrohir knelt above his love and kissed him. First on the cheeks, then on the forehead, after that on the eyes and then he captured his brother's lips, trying to deny the truth, pretending that his brother wouldn't die, wouldn't leave him alone. But he did. He felt it when Elladan stopped responding, when his arms fell down. When he closed his eyes. And it was then when he started to cry again.
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Love and Sorrow by Milly
Story notes: This fiction is written for Az, I personally hate character death.
