"-and that's when Mr. Baggins said, 'Go on and have a good look, lads, 'cause you an't getting your hands on a bit of it!'"
Sam was seated at the large, circular table in the middle of the servants' dining hall, with three maids and the pantry-boy hanging on his words. Mrs. Scrubbs, the cook, had provided him with a cup of tea and some currant-buns fresh from the oven, and stood listening from the kitchen doorway while she kept one eye on the luncheon leg-of-lamb on its spit and several boiling pots on the stove.
Frodo, returning from his own interview with the Thain, stopped at the entrance on the opposite end of the room. He couldn't help smiling at the sight of the enthralled audience gathered around his friend. Sam had a way with maid-servants and older women. He didn't, however, recall saying anything like the sentence Sam had just attributed to him.
"You never saw nothing like how those Longchalk lads fell over themselves when Mr. Baggins told 'em how he'd seen through 'em," Sam went on with his story. "They didn't think the Mayor's son was cheating at racing at all, but only wanted to make a scandal by saying so. Meek as mice, they were, once we called 'em out on it."
"But what did they want the gold for, then?" one of the maids asked.
"If Lad Whitfoot'd given it to 'm, that'd be like proof that he was guilty as they was saying, and nobody'd believe contrary-wise and his reputation'd be ruined. Because of Mr. Baggins, he was saved."
With horror, Frodo realized which investigation of theirs Sam was recounting. "Ah, Sam-" he said tentatively, blushing as all eyes turned to notice him, "you aren't telling them that story?"
"Not all of it, Frodo," Sam assured him, and introduced his audience around the table. "This is Miss Elsey Cragtop and her sister, Miss Tilsey, and Miss Lacy Appledore. The lad here is Jeddy Tubrose. I was just telling 'em that you snuck out o' the inn under the very noses of them Longchalks to find me. That's all."
"It must be wonderful to have so many exciting adventures, as Mr. Gamgee's been telling us, Mr. Baggins," Jeddy said wistfully.
"You were supposed to be asking questions, not telling stories, Sam," Frodo chided.
The maids came vigorously to Sam's defense. "Oh, he did!" the same girl who had spoken before, Lacy, protested. "He asked us whether anybody else was here in the kitchens afore his Thainship took ill."
"And we told 'm!" said Tilsey. "Everything we could tell, Mr. Baggins. On our honor!"
"I'll tell you the same and I told your friend here, Mr. Baggins. There's been nobody here in my kitchens as didn't ought to be," Mrs. Scrubbs said, and brandished the large wooden stirring-spoon she held in one hand as if she intended to drive out any would-be intruders with it.
"The maids said as how they'd rather go walking out with their sweethearts out-of-doors when they get the chance," Sam reported, which provoked delighted giggles from all three girls.
"Might someone have gotten into the butler's pantry or wine-cellars unnoticed?" asked Frodo.
"Not through my kitchen," Mrs. Scrubbs insisted. "If I'm not here from breakfast-time 'til the dinner dishes is washed and put away, at least one o' my girls is. And Mr. Tulipant's always about if he's not looking after his Thainship. There's only the one door that goes out through the scullery, and it goes up to the gardens and the rubbish heap at the top o' Eastsides Hill. There's a cart track that runs up that way, for deliveries 'n' such, but it's a climb for any visitors to take if they want to call upon us. Better they knock at the front door!" It was then the cook noticed that one of the pots on the stove behind was boiling up dangerously and she went to attend to it.
"You'd never think it was one of us, Mr. Baggins!" Jeddy asked. "Nobody aside from Mr. Tulipant serves the wine, and he'd never let me touch a glass as had the Thain's Special in it!"
"Poor Mr. Tulipant," said Lacy. "He's taken it awful hard--as if it's all his fault for carrying the wine to his Thainship."
"I don't suspect you," Frodo told the boy. Unless one of these young hobbits bore a grudge toward their master, he doubted they could have taken the trouble to poison him. Did they even have the opportunity to do so? "You've all been trusted in the Thain's service for many years."
"Not so many years for me!" answered Jeddy. "I only came to work at the Hall last summer, though I used to help out my dad in the garden since I was a little lad."
"And none of us has been here more'n four or five years," said Elsey. This was usual; most young girls from the local farms and villages who took work as servants in a grand household only intended to be there for a short while. It gave them a chance to get out of their homes, see new places and meet new people, learn more about housekeeping than their mothers had taught them, and earn some money before they married. Few made a career out of service.
"I suppose Mr. Tulipant's been with Thain Brabantius longer than anyone else," said Frodo.
"Not longer'n my dad," said Jeddy with a note of pride. "He's been here since his dad was gardener."
"And what about Mrs. Scrubbs?" asked Sam. "She must've been here for ages."
"Oh, not Mrs. Scrubbs," said Tilsey. "She only came last year, after our last cook left. Her Ladyship hired her."
"It's not us. It's them you're thinking of, isn't it?" asked Lacy. "One o' his Thainship's family?"
Frodo didn't answer this, but Sam's eyes briefly met his and the maids understood.
"Oh, how horrible!" cried Elsey. "'Tisn't any wonder his poor Thainship's been in such a state."
"Which one d'you think it is, Mr. Baggins?" asked Lacy.
"I'll wager anything you like it's that new Missus Stuck-up," Tilsey said. Her frankness and the disrespectful nickname astonished both Frodo and Sam.
"You mean her ladyship?" asked Sam.
"No! I meant Missus Persifilla, as is Mr. Ulfidius's wife," the girl explained. "I do her lady-maiding for her and she's a wrong un, I can tell you! Greedy. Gives herself airs like she's Lady o' the Hall already. Gave up a good lad for it, too. No, I never meant her ladyship, Mr. Gamgee. I wouldn't say a word bad about her."
"You'd best not, Tilsey Cragtop!" said Mrs. Scrubbs. She had finished attending to her pots on the stove and stood in the kitchen doorway regarding the maid with hands on her hips and a fierce scowl on her face. "Her ladyship's as fine a lady as ever there was and I won't hear no word against her. There's enough o' that from his Thainship's family, as ought to know better."
Frodo was surprised that Mrs. Scrubbs should show such ferocious loyalty toward Lady Iris, when Iris had only hired her a few months ago. He wondered if they had known each other much longer than that.
"I didn't, Missus Scrubbs," Tilsey defended herself. "I like her ladyship. If anybody says she did it, I wouldn't believe 'em."
"Nor more'n I would. Now you girls and Jeddy've spent enough time chattering with these detectives," Mrs. Scrubbs answered. "They'll be wanting their lunch laid out in the dining-room soon enough, and we'll be wanting ours laid out here. Beg your pardon, Mr. Baggins, Mr. Gamgee, but we've got work to do and I need my maids to do it. You'll have to go." She was adamant; any further questions would have to wait. Frodo asked if he and Sam could go out the back way and see the kitchen gardens and, once Mrs. Scrubbs' permission had been granted, they got out of her way.
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