After a few minutes spent in silence, Legolas asked about the silver thread meandering across the land; a river that seemed to enter the forest before leading away from the other side. "Can we go there?"
Haldir nodded and his head disappeared under the leaves. Legolas followed.
"Would you like to swim?"
"I didn't bring any swimwear."
"Warriors here do not wear swimwear when they jump into rivers," Haldir smirked.
"There is nothing wrong with being modest," Legolas sniffed.
"I agree, but swimwear is just another thing to carry when going on patrol and best left at home." Haldir was intrigued. Neither the elves in Mithlond nor Imladris wore swimwear, so he wondered if the elves in Mirkwood really didn't or whether Legolas was not like most warriors.
"We do not swim in the rivers when on patrol; the Enchanted River is a death trap and the Forest River has all sorts of biting fish and other dread creatures living in it. We do not wear clothes in the communal baths, but I hardly know you so it wouldn't be seemly." Legolas looked away.
"How about whether I would find it seemly?"
Legolas stopped descending the steps. "I get the impression that you do not find anything unseemly."
Haldir wanted to bite but said nothing. Instead he walked past Legolas and continued going down. Then annoyance got the better of him. "You seem repressed to me."
"I beg your pardon?"
Legolas shot past him and called back that he would ask Lady Galadriel for a different bodyguard, one who possessed manners if nothing else.
Haldir ran down and caught Legolas' arm. "Do that and I will tell her that you are scandalised because I wear nothing when jumping in rivers. I will suggest you are hiding something, like three cocks in your undies." Haldir grinned. "The elves here would think it extremely odd if you wore clothes to get wet while swimming and some would find your remarks about me being unseemly rather offensive. After all, I am a many times decorated war hero."
"I am many times decorated too," Legolas snarled.
"Then we are the highly decorated hero twins, aren't we?" Haldir turned with a smirk. "Come along. The river is waiting."
"I don't see why I should go anywhere with you!"
"Because I am supposed to be showing you around. Let's not escalate this into an argument that neither of us will back out of. Otherwise we do the evil one's work for him."
"How is he in any way an influence on how we get along?" Legolas' mouth hung open for a swift second.
Haldir shrugged, a gesture that Legolas found appealing, much to his annoyance. "I don't know. It sounded good. I bet you thought it sounded good but you will say it sounded like a goat farting just because you are determined to argue with me."
"What? What has goats farting got to do with us arguing?"
"Nothing really. I thought it was amusing."
"For Valar's sake," Legolas muttered as he walked past Haldir again.
"Come on, don't you find me a little bit funny?"
"In a puerile way," Legolas sniffed.
"Is that because you are repressed?" Haldir tried his cheekiest grin.
"Oh stop that." In spite of himself Legolas smiled. "I am not repressed."
"Prove it."
"You will not get to me that easily."
Haldir merely shrugged and gave an inscrutable smile. Legolas decided to ignore him.
At the bottom of the tree Haldir led the way. "It's not far."
They joined the main thoroughfare winding through the trees towards an area not quite as nice as the one he lived in and followed on until they reached the area where the wealthier elves lived; larger mallorns grew there so could support more spacious flets.
"The Celebrant forms a bow shaped curve in the forest. We will go to the nearest part." Legolas did not see the slight smile on Haldir's lips.
The Royal apartments looked over a serene part of the Celebrant, whereas further up river there were elves washing their clothes, chatting and singing. Small elflings frolicked in the water and occasionally one of the women would shout at them to be careful. It looked as if some elves were bathing. Way beyond them stood a figure in a white ceremonial dress casting flowers over the gently flowing waters, loudly asking for Yavanna's blessing.
"How did I not see the river before now?" Legolas peered upstream at the crowds enjoying themselves and working.
"Possibly because it was dark when you arrived and the entrance to the royal apartments faces away from the river?"
"Surely I would have heard it?"
Haldir smiled. "Our Lady commands the Celebrant to be silent at night; she doesn't sleep well otherwise. The crickets have to be quiet too, and the birds are not allowed to start singing until nine in the morning."
"Sometimes I do not know whether you are joking or not." Legolas walked ahead, not waiting for Haldir.
"I expect you could go in our Lady's private stretch of river." Haldir caught up with Legolas. "After all, you are her honoured guest."
"I expect I could indeed." Legolas looked up river again. "This will never do."
"What's wrong?" Haldir looked up the river towards the noisy crowds, singing and laughing and generally enjoying themselves. He could see nothing to frown about.
"I refuse to remove my clothing in front of others. It is not seemly, at least where I come from."
"If you feel uncomfortable, then we could sit by the river instead." Haldir sat on a large rock. "Come, sit beside me. We can watch the fish." His hand patted the smooth rock. Inside he smiled; Legolas was tempted.
"So we look like a loving couple?" Legolas raised one eyebrow, leading Haldir to sigh.
"I like to look at the fish swimming. They haven't a care in the world. Or they look as if they haven't." Haldir got off the rock and lay on the grass, his head hanging over the river. When he submerged his face he could see sticklebacks darting to and fro, around the rocks and plants on the sandy bed. Behind the larger rocks lurked larger fish, more timid because they had reason to be. Sticklebacks were without a care because they were unlikely to be caught by worms skewered by iron hooks.
He sensed movement beside him, rather than hearing anything. When he looked to his left he saw Legolas staring at the fish. He turned his head slightly and smiled. A stream of bubbles escaped his mouth as he tried to speak. Quickly he raised his head, as did Haldir.
"I was saying that I have never stared at fish in the river like that before." Legolas grinned widely. "It looks pretty safe in there."
"It is safe," Haldir said, knowing now the reason for Legolas' reticence. It wasn't about whether he had trunks to wear but about what might happen to him. "Do you want to go in now, or would you like to just sit here. Whatever you want to do we will do it."
"You have to understand. We dare not do that in the rivers where I live. This is all new to me." He picked a blade of grass and crushed it between his fingers, rubbing it in circles so it stained his skin.
Haldir tried not to watch. "Legolas, you are one of the bravest elves I have ever met. Don't look surprised. You have to deal with terrors that elves here can only imagine. You have told me hardly anything, and yet I am full of awe for all the horrors that you have endured and do so on a daily basis. Because of you and your warriors your people know peace. Maybe they complain about their lot in life, or say that they wish they did not have to live as part of a closed society, but at the heart of it you and your warriors are the most affected and yet you make sure the realm survives. The Mirkwood Army must be a fine body of elves indeed." Haldir paused, wondering whether to carry on. "If you do not want to get into the water then I am certain there are very good reasons for your decision not to do so. I will not push the point further."
"I do want to get into the water but I dare not. I know this river will not hurt me, but my mind cannot get away from the creatures and foul substances lurking in the rivers that run through Mirkwood." His voice lowered. "I have seen what they do to elves."
Haldir was intrigued but resisted asking for an in depth description. "Then you have good reason not to swim in any river."
"I know I am being silly but it will take time for me to feel safe after all the awful things I have seen. Shall we go?" Legolas looked longingly at the water.
Haldir stood up. "Where to?"
"Anywhere."
Legolas turned and looked at the elflings playing in the river upstream. They were not far away and obviously safe. He sighed.
"Come on," Haldir said softly. "We can go to my tavern and drink ourselves senseless and then we can brag about all the dangerous and brave things we have done, and even how many orcs we have killed."
"If I...If I go in.... " Legolas looked around, eyes resolute. hiding his apprehension.
Haldir placed his arms around Legolas, aware that he was being rather forward. "I will be right beside you. I promise you, there are no hidden surprises in these waters."
"I can see the children over there enjoying themselves and I know their mothers would not let them come to harm. I also know that Lady Galadriel keeps the realm safe..."
"We will be fine," Haldir said softly.
